The Next Great Adventure
by Marie Kollman
Summary: When a mysterious woman from Shepard's vision on Eden Prime suddenly appears years later on the Silversun Strip, the finest minds aboard the SR-2 work to uncover her origins. But, as the crew soon discovers, science doesn't hold all the answers. How could Abby Cousland have sacrificed her life to save Ferelden only to awaken on the Citadel? And, more importantly, why?
1. Arrival

_**Author's Note: We're going to move in and out of canon in this story. The events will intertwine with much of the timeline of Mass Effect 3 but we won't be following the exact order of events laid out in the game and some missions will not occur at all. The majority of the story will be set in the Mass Effect world, with a few scenes set in Dragon Age: Origins. We hope you enjoy unraveling the mystery!**_

**The Next Great Adventure**

**Arrival**

**The Normandy, 2183**

The first time he 'saw' her was just after Eden Prime.

Strange, disjointed images invaded his thoughts, offering tantalising glimpses which faded to nothing just before they took shape. Were they in his thoughts, though? Or could he actually seethem?

"Hey! Look!" he heard a far-off female voice cry. "He's coming round!"

One hand grabbed his shoulder, another clasped his own hand, which flailed wildly through the air. "It's okay, Commander," said a softer, male voice. "Just take it easy."

His eyes opened, and it took him a minute to register the three people who surrounded his bed. To his left was Kaidan, who was gently but firmly holding his shoulder down, and to his right was Ashley, who clutched his hand. At the foot of his bed stood Dr. Chakwas, wearing a perma-raised eyebrow, her face a study in professionalism and calm.

"Where is she?" Shepard blurted out, Kaidan's strong hand preventing him from sitting up. Shepard covered his eyes with his forearm and muttered under his breath while Chakwas and Ashley exchanged a glance.

"We're... right here, Commander," replied Williams, waving her hand in front of Shepard's face as he uncovered it and struggled to focus on her.

"No… the-the woman… where is she?" Shepard asked again, and propped himself up on his elbows, his eyes darting around the med bay.

Chakwas moved to the head of the bed – Kaidan stepping aside to allow her room – and looked down at Shepard before entering something on her datapad. "You were out for fifteen hours, Commander," she stated coolly, although her brow was wrinkled in concern. "What do you remember?"

Shepard stared blankly at the far wall for a minute, his eyes narrowing slightly as he struggled to make sense of the maelstrom swirling around in his head. And then his eyes widened, his breath rushing out of his lungs.

"I saw her again! She's here, in my head! Where…" He swung his legs over the side of the bed and attempted to stand but was body-blocked by Williams.

"Commander, you need to _lie down_," she said forcefully, hands on her hips.

Shepard sighed, feeling woozy and disorientated. He was in no shape to argue with the feisty woman and glanced at Chakwas, who touched Williams's arm, causing her to step back.

"What did you see?" prompted the doctor.

"I saw… I can't make sense of any of it. Machines… flesh… blood."

"Sounds like a nightmare," Kaidan commented, shaking his head.

"What about the woman? Who was she?" Ashley questioned just as Captain Anderson entered.

"It's the only thing that's clear," Shepard mumbled. "I kept seeing a woman with blonde hair and really vivid blue eyes. Pretty."

Anderson moved to the bedside, Ashley and Kaidan straightening up and saluting. Shepard attempted the same, but was stopped by Anderson's outstretched hand.

"How's he holding up?" the captain asked Chakwas, who passed her datapad to him for inspection. He took a minute to read it before nodding. "Hm. Well, glad to see you're on your feet, Shepard," he said to his XO before looking at Kaidan and Ashley. "Dismissed."

They gave another salute before Williams turned back to Shepard. "You know where we are if you need us," she said, and Kaidan shook Shepard's hand before leaving with Chakwas, who promised to return after the men's debriefing.

**9:30 Dragon  
****Outside of Lothering**

The first time she 'saw' him was just after her Joining. Ostagar had been lost and she and Alistair had barely escaped with their lives.

She'd slept in fitful spells, each short period of peace infected with the 'song' of the Archdemon. The visions of darkspawn monstrosity swallowed her whole, the heat of their lair, the smell of their foul forms permeating every moment until she heard an unfamiliar voice off in the distance.

It was then that the dream changed.

She wasn't sure of the purpose of the words he spoke. His language she knew, but his accent was one she'd never heard before. He didn't approach, just lingered at the edge of her dream, his outline clear, his dress foreign.

"Now! Go now!" he commanded, his blue eyes alight with certainty. She woke then, his voice still clear in her mind, her heart thundering in her chest.

"Bad dreams?" Alistair had asked her and it was then that he told her of her new connection to the darkspawn and the Archdemon.

She'd quietly accepted what he'd shared with her, but the images she'd seen plagued her, and finally, days later, she'd asked her fellow warden about the details of her dream.

Alistair had confirmed that much of the dream was shared, their individual visions apparently not so individual after all: the only deviation from their mutual vision was the man she'd seen at its close.

"No, there's no man in the dream, Abby," he'd answered, shaking his head. "Horrifying dragon that seems to be looking directly at you? Check. Stinking, putrid horde all excited about killing us? Check. But strange man in odd clothing… nope, no check. I haven't seen him."

"Is it possible that not everything would be the same?" she'd asked, her uncertainty at her understanding of what she'd seen increasing with each shake of his head. "Perhaps our dreams vary?"

Alistair had simply shrugged. "To be honest, Abby, you know about as much as I do. I wouldn't worry about it too much."

Eventually, when she'd grown accustomed to the nightmares, she'd learned to ignore the horror they struck into her heart. It would be months before she saw the man again, but when she did, she couldn't ignore the courage his words gave her.

**Knossos System, 2183**

The second time he saw her was after Liara had been rescued from the prothean ruins on Therum, and the newly-appointed Spectre Shepard had succeeded Anderson as CO of the Normandy.

This time, he regained consciousness more easily, and felt a gentle presence guide him back to the waking world. His eyes opened to find warm blue hands resting against his cheeks, and searching blue eyes gazing into his own.

"Shepard," Liara breathed, still cradling his face with her hands, "how was it?"

He blinked and glanced around, slowly remembering that he and Liara were standing in the conference room, his senior staff seated around them. "I saw the woman again!" he declared excitedly before Liara swayed, and he grabbed her by the arms.

"What did you do to him?" Ashley demanded of Liara, who Shepard was guiding to a chair.

"She helped me," Shepard defended with a stern look at Ashley as he took a seat next to the asari scientist. "I saw more of the blonde woman. She was standing right next to me. She's almost as tall as I am. Her clothing… it was so strange. Like a short dress, but there were… buckles, straps. Made of some kind of animal skin, I think. It's like she's from a different time. Maybe a long time."

"I wonder who she is?" Kaidan asked curiously. "And why do you keep seeing her?"

"I also saw her," Liara provided. "She was not a prothean, but human. She was quite beautiful."

"Glad there are still _some _humans around here," Williams commented sourly, and Shepard glared at her before Liara clutched her head.

"You should lie down," Shepard advised her. "Go see Dr. Chakwas. She'll check you over."

"Yes… all right," Liara mumbled, rising with a little assistance from Shepard.

"The rest of you are dismissed," Shepard ordered and waited as the senior crew filed out. "Williams," he said just before Ashley reached the door, and he didn't speak again until the room was clear. "Would you care to explain your comments just now?"

She raised her chin defiantly, meeting Shepard's hard stare. "Sir, I don't approve of aliens who we've only just met performing mind tricks on you. Who knows what she's put into your head?"

Exasperated, he paced a little before facing her and folding his arms. "Is that all?"

"Sir?"

"Is it really because she's an 'alien'," he said with emphasis, making air quotations with his fingers, "or because she's a woman? Or, more accurately, because her species _look_ like women? Just what is your problem?"

Ashley stiffened, her eyes glinting. "You've already made it clear that you're not interested in me."

"So it's the 'alien' thing, then?"

"I believe T'Soni's trying to manipulate you," she accused. "All the gentle touches, the dizzy spells… and she did something to your mind. She said she'd be able to help you make sense of your visions, but even she – an expert on the protheans – couldn't make sense of it. What was the point of it all?"

"Yes, she _did_ do something – she made the vision more vivid. Now I can see more of the woman's features. She has long eyelashes and a few freckles on her nose. I almost feel like I know her, but I can't place her."

"Excuse me, Commander, but listen to yourself," she retorted. "You're describing yourself – _you_ have blond hair, blue eyes and freckles on your nose." She stepped closer to Shepard, her arms folded. "This so-called vision was implanted in your mind by an alien device, and it was amplified by _another_ alien, one who seems to be soft on you."

"There is nothing 'so-called' about my vision, Gunnery Chief!"

"Yeah, and there's nothing 'so-called' about the way Liara looks at you, either. _Sir."_

Shepard stared at her in disbelief for a moment before scrubbing his face with his hands. "All right. For the record, I am not attracted to women, period. You need to stop taking this so personally, Williams."

Ashley's face fell and she appeared to pale a little. "Oh. I see." She swallowed and straightened up. "Sorry, Commander. I thought-"

"You thought wrong," he replied and paused for a beat, keeping his voice steady. "This needs to stop. And I don't want to hear any more about how the 'aliens' are trying to control us. Liara is an ally, as are Garrus and Wrex. And give me a little credit for having a mind of my own."

"Yes, sir," she replied with admirable steadiness and dignity, snapping a salute. "I'm sorry."

He watched her for a moment, and realised that part of him understood her fears and sympathised with her, now that he'd effectively crushed her hopes of a romance between them. "You're a damn good soldier, Williams, as well as a friend. I hope this isn't going to affect that."

She gave a single nod and turned on her heel, heading for the door. Before leaving, however, she looked over her shoulder. "Just so you know, Commander, if you have any designs on LT-"

"Kaidan's not my type," he interrupted, "and I'm sure as hell not his."

"Good answer," she replied tartly, and a faint smile passed between them before she sailed through the doorway.

**9:30 Dragon  
****Outside of Denerim**

She saw him for a second time just before the Landsmeet, but his appearance at the vision's close was almost forgotten.

The wardens again shared the dream of the Archdemon, but this time it was much more vivid and deadly in its message, and the man's call was nearly lost in the panic the scenes brought her.

Abby and Alistair awoke to a fierce fight, shrieks attacking the haven of their camp and it wasn't until long after that she could reflect on what had transpired.

Alistair was nervous, the knowledge that the Archdemon had actively sought them out rattling him, but for Abby, it had demonstrated something else altogether. It was no longer the sheer numbers of the darkspawn that made her blood run cold, but the Archdemon's choice to attack their camp. It proved it was thinking tactically and that made the entirety of the event all the more horrendous. And yet...

This time, the strange man's call, "Now! Go now!" had been heard at a crucial moment. Had he not cried out to her, had she not seen the red stripe on his uniform, the odd number on his chest, would she have awoken before being sliced in two by the shriek that stood over her?

Again Alistair didn't know of the man she spoke of, again and again he discounted the value of the mysterious person's role in her dream, but she could not. Everything within her knew he was more than a straggling idea and she understood that he'd saved her life.

The question that plagued her stopped being _who_ and grew into _why_. And, weeks later as she drove the shard of what remained of her father's sword into the Archdemon's body, as the light and heat of its death tore through her, she heard the mysterious man again.

"_Now! Go now!"_

And then she heard nothing more. Not for a very long time.

**The Normandy, 2183**

The third time he saw her was at Saren's base on Virmire just before encountering Sovereign for the first time. As he was accompanied by Liara and Williams, however, he kept it quiet.

Upon his return to the Normandy, he and the rest of the crew were too devastated by Ashley's subsequent death to discuss the mission in anything more than a perfunctory manner. After sending his report to the Fifth Fleet and deciding, on this occasion, not to inform the unsupportive Council, he checked in on Kaidan before retiring to his office on the Crew Deck.

A few hours later, Kaidan visited Shepard, finding the commander with his omni-tool activated, a large screen suspended in mid-air above his desk.

"Is that the woman?" Kaidan asked, looking up at the screen as he sat down.

"Best I can get her," Shepard answered. "I've been trying to draw her while the memory's fresh. Way to take my mind off things, I guess," he added with a half-hearted shrug. "Shame I can't draw."

"Does it _look_ like her, though?" queried Kaidan, glad for the distraction.

Shepard looked up at the screen, committing his drawing of her face to memory before closing his eyes and sighing. "Kinda. But something's not right. I don't know what. It's really bugging me."

He opened his eyes and took a second look, realising that he hadn't quite got her eyes right. He re-opened the image creator program on his omni-tool and tinkered with his creation, grunting in annoyance when his efforts proved unsuccessful. "It's her eyes. I can't get them to look like the picture I have in my head."

Kaidan tilted his head and studied the drawing for a while. "You know... she kinda looks like you. Similar lips, and the nose is almost an exact match. She has the same colouring as you, too."

"Huh," Shepard mumbled. "Ash said something like that. Maybe my memory isn't as reliable as I'd thought."

"Well, maybe you should ask Liara? She saw the woman as well. Maybe she could help out?"

"That's a good idea, Lieutenant," Shepard replied, but made no move to stand up, and both men stared into space for several minutes before Shepard broke the silence. "I shouldn't be doing this. I'm still waiting to hear from Ash's family. Alliance Command's informed them, but I wanted to speak to them too. Just wish I knew what the hell to say."

"Tell them the truth," advised Kaidan. "She died a hero."

Shepard stared down at his boots. "She died because…" He shook his head, and Kaidan leaned forward in his chair, clasping his hands together.

"You spent more than an hour with me this afternoon convincing me that it wasn't my fault. Well, it wasn't yours, either, sir. You _had_ to make a decision, and fast. If I'd been down on the ground, you would have made the same decision, because it was the one that saved the most lives, and you'd be having this conversation with Ash. You're our commander because you _can_ make the hard decisions – you didn't hesitate, even though it's tearing you up right now. You did the right thing, Shepard," he said with conviction, though his voice faltered. "Ash agreed."

Shepard stared up at the screen, and the reproduction of the mysterious blonde woman. "I'm insulting Ash's memory by _playing _with this thing," he said, irritated with himself. "Come on," he invited Kaidan before standing up. "We've got a memorial service to arrange."

The image of the blonde woman fizzled out as Shepard deactivated the screen, and he forgot about her for a very long time.

**After the Killing Blow**

Nothing made sense to her, everything was bright and moving, and she felt like she was swimming in the chaos around her, maybe even drowning. Her eyes couldn't keep up with the commotion, her focus lost.

The pain was extraordinary and completely unexpected. She'd done what Riordan had commanded: she'd turned down Morrigan's offer and had sunk her blade into the beast, so why wasn't she dead?

She felt people around her, touching her, speaking to her and over her, but as her vision fixed on what surrounded her, she was overwhelmed with fear. Lights flashed and music thundered near her, and the structures that seemed to touch the very sky had pictures moving across them.

Was this the Golden City?

A stabbing pain shot through her and she closed her eyes against it, the intensity making her cry out. The people around her, many of whom looked like nothing she'd ever seen before, drew closer and she sensed their concern.

And then, she saw him for the third time.

Kneeling close, his features finally clear, she saw his kind blue eyes and heard his words, and tried to hold onto him, to latch on before he slipped away and she was left alone in the noise and the lights.

She felt a touch and then, he was gone.

**The Citadel, Present Day**

"Well, Joker. I guess that's answered _that _question."

"Bite me, Cortez."

The flight lieutenants deactivated their tech armor and stepped out of the Armax Arena onto the Silversun plaza, one of them looking very pleased with himself, the other less so. Behind them – trying but failing to maintain their stern demeanours – were the commander of the Normandy and his sometimes-XO, Major Alenko.

"Didn't know you were into that kind of thing," purred Steve with a wink at the affronted Joker, who held his hands up and limped ahead.

"Children," Kaidan remonstrated good-naturedly. "So you had a bet, and one of you lost. Why don't we all be mature adults about this?"

"Yeah, why don't we?" Shepard interjected with a pointed look at Cortez. "Wouldn't want to give anyone the wrong idea, would we?"

Cortez dropped back a little and sidled closer to Shepard. "I was just trying to soften the blow of his humiliating defeat. You know I only have eyes for one man," he finished on a whisper.

Shepard cleared his throat, firmly suppressed a grin and walked after Joker, leaving a beaming Cortez to catch up with Kaidan. "Hey, Joker!" called the commander. "Wanna grab some noodles?"

"Only if _he _quits rubbing my nose in it," Joker griped, nodding towards Steve. "So you won. Whoop-de-fucking-doo."

"Hey, I'm magnanimous in victory," declared Cortez, holding his arms wide open. "How about a hug, show there are no hard feelings?"

"Yeah, it's _hard feelings_ I'm afraid of. I'll pass on the hug, thanks." Joker moved to Shepard's side and pointed at Cortez. "You can sit opposite me. And _no _footsies."

"Hey, what's that? Guys, take a look over there," Kaidan said, turning to look at a small commotion further down the Strip. Quickly, Shepard moved to his side and they watched as the small contingent of C-Sec officers attempted to hold back the growing crowd.

"Come on, Spectre Alenko," said Shepard, and both men, who were still fully-armored, made their way towards the clamour, pushing past the spectators.

"What's going on here?" Shepard demanded, his eyes widening when he looked down at the ground.

"I don't know, Commander," answered a baffled C-Sec officer. "She just… appeared."

"Jesus, give her some air!" Kaidan commanded, and the people in the crowd stepped back but did not depart. He crouched down next to Shepard, who was examining the bloodied, battered body of a barely-conscious human female wearing a very odd ensemble of clothing. "How bad is she?" Kaidan asked as Shepard scanned her with his omni-tool.

"Bad," Shepard said gruffly, administering medi-gel, and he indicated that Kaidan should do the same. Shepard looked up at the crowd and pointed to the far end of the Strip. "He _said_ give her some air! Get outta here!" he ordered, and the spectators, wisely deciding not to disobey him, slowly started to leave, any stragglers moved along by C-Sec.

"What the hell?" asked Joker, who had been held back by the departing spectators, and Steve squatted next to the two Spectres.

"Shhh, she's gotta be terrified," Cortez said, watching her with concern. Her eyes met his. "Ma'am? It's okay, you're safe."

Her gaze darted away and she stared straight up, her vivid blue eyes unblinking, and Shepard felt his stomach flip as he recognized them.

"What's she looking at?" Joker asked, also glancing up at the sky cars which hummed overhead, and the dazzling neon displays along the Strip.

"Steve's right, she's terrified," Shepard deduced from her rapid breathing and stiffened posture. He tapped his omni-tool and frowned at the readout. "Shit, her heart rate's sky high. We need more than medi-gel, we need Chakwas! Steve?"

Cortez leapt to his feet and nodded.

"Now! Go now!" Shepard ordered as he watched her heart rate spike on his screen, and Cortez raced off. "Kaidan, can you–"

"I got it." Kaidan entered a rapid command and administered a sedative, which quickly took effect. The woman's eyes began to flutter closed before they became fixated on the N7 logo on Shepard's chest plate. She gasped and tried to grab him but her arm didn't quite reach him and flopped onto her chest, her eyes closing and her body falling limp.

"What now?" Kaidan asked Shepard, who was already scooping her up into his arms.

"We get her somewhere quiet and safe. Then we need to figure out who she is."

At that moment, one of the C-Sec officers walked over to them, having dealt with the hangers-on. "Do you know this woman, Commander?" he asked.

"Uh… yeah, I think so," he mumbled, hardly able to believe what he was saying. Ignoring the curious looks he was receiving from his friends, he clutched her tightly against his chest. "I'll take responsibility for her, Officer. Spectre authority."

"Of course, Commander, Major," said the turian officer, who entered a quick report onto his datapad before leaving.

"Let's take her to the apartment," Shepard said. "Hopefully Steve will return with Dr. Chakwas soon and we'll figure this out."

"Wouldn't Huerta Memorial be better for her?" Joker asked as Kaidan picked up a few strange objects from the ground.

"No, that's not an option," Shepard stated. He didn't know what was happening, but he did know she needed to be around as few people as possible, and that once she awoke, they'd need a chance to speak privately. "Let's get her moved and quickly."

"What the hell?" Kaidan muttered, examining the woman's possessions.

"What have you got there?" Shepard asked Kaidan, who held a small pouch containing thin wooden sticks and a large, curved piece of wood, joined at each end by a taut string.

Joker took one of the sticks from the pouch. "Never seen anything like it," he commented, examining the arrow in his hand, noticing the engravings down its shaft.

"Maybe for hunting? But why would she have it here?" Kaidan wondered as he separated the quiver from the bow. "It can't be offensive. Our armor would snap those things in half or fry them."

"Bring them with us," Shepard directed and Kaidan nodded. "Let's get her upstairs and quickly. Come on."

"Okay," Joker began, "but I still think the hospital's-"

"Objection noted," Shepard interrupted sternly, his tone brooking no argument. Carefully, he steadied the woman into his arms and moved toward the elevator that would take them to the apartment.

~o~O~o~

Shepard roamed the kitchen of his apartment aimlessly, his nerves jarred by the arrival of the woman. Steve had, of course, made good on his promise to bring Chakwas back quickly, and while the men waited, the doctor assessed their mysterious guest's condition.

James had come in from his night at the arcade and had quickly been given an update on the evening's events. He, Kaidan and Steve were lounging by the fireplace, speaking in low voices as Shepard prowled the rest of the main floor, waiting to pounce on Chakwas when she emerged from the back bedroom.

He paused at the island in the center of the kitchen again and moved around a few pots and pans, his fingers tapping on the cool countertop before he pushed away and began another lap of the apartment.

"You're gonna wear the floor out," Joker said. The pilot was seated at the island, a beer in hand, and had quietly been watching Shepard pace for the last twenty minutes or so. "Plus, you're getting on my nerves with all this pacing. What're you so worked up about anyway?"

Steve entered the kitchen before Shepard could reply.

"Actually, I was about to ask you the same thing, Adam," Steve began. "I know finding that poor woman was a bit unexpected, but to be honest, you've had more interesting surprises than that before, most of which didn't even faze you."

Shepard sighed and nodded. "There's more to it than that," he explained. "I think… I believe I may know her. Or at least, I've seen her before. And if I'm right, then I can't begin to understand what it could mean."

Joker laughed. "Hey, man, I'm sure that whatever you need to share with us, Cortez will understand that we all have a past. Don't sweat it."

Steve smiled softly but Shepard shook his head.

"She's the woman from your vision, isn't she?" Kaidan asked as he too entered the kitchen, James at his side. "It took me a little, but I remembered that drawing you made after Virmire. It's her, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I think it is," Shepard replied, his voice hollow.

"Vision?" James asked, looking between the major and the commander. "Is this the one you got from that beacon on Eden Prime?"

"The first hints we had of the Reapers," Steve muttered under his breath. "But I've read that report, it doesn't say anything about a woman."

"It does," Shepard countered. "It's just not all that specific in her description."

James nodded slowly, his hands on his hips. "There _was_ a part that talked about you seeing a female that you implied was possibly human. But the analysts didn't think it was related to the core message, they figured it was a lingering image of some sort."

"Right," Shepard nodded. "The consensus was that she was separate from the intended communication. Her appearance didn't seem to connect with anything that was seen and since the original report was made, we've met Javik, who's confirmed humans weren't affected by the last cycle."

Kaidan leaned against the end of the island and crossed his arms. "Javik's information seemed to solidify the general belief that the woman in the commander's vision was unrelated. But I remember how clearly you saw her, how certain you were at the time that she was connected in some way."

"I was," the commander agreed, gesturing to the back bedroom where the woman was being treated by Chakwas. "Looks like I was right, too. But as much as I love proving anyone sitting in a lab analyzing my work wrong, it's opened a real can of worms. Who is she? Why is she here? And what the hell does she have to do with the Reapers?"

"I'd like to add a question to that list of yours, Commander," began Dr. Chakwas as she entered the kitchen from the back hall. "How is she alive?"

Shepard arched an eyebrow. "Isn't that what you do? Keep people from dying?"

She grinned at his cheeky comment. "I do and rather well, as the woman back there can attest, but that's _not_ the point of my question. I've run extensive blood work and while I'd very much like to have Mordin's opinion on what I've found, I do know one thing for certain. Your young lady, who looks to be no more than twenty-two or twenty-three years old, is far older than that."

Kaidan frowned. "How much older? Even covered in blood and wounds, it was hard to miss that she's probably in her early twenties."

"Genetic markers, as well as the inherited immunity traits present in her blood, indicate she is very likely over one thousand years old," Chakwas explained.

"You gotta be kidding me," James said quietly, shaking his head. "How's that possible?"

"Good question," Kaidan added. "Is she even human?"

Joker pulled a face. "If she is, she's using a damned good wrinkle cream."

"She's human, that much I can confirm, but how she's managed to outlive even an asari matriarch is beyond me. And it's possible I'm shaving several hundred years off her actual age."

Shepard's handsome features revealed nothing and his voice was even and steady. "Is she all right?"

Chakwas nodded. "She is. Thanks to your and Kaidan's quick thinking, those medigels saved her life. I merely fine-tuned what you two started," the doctor continued. "Whoever she is, though, she's seen her fair share of injuries, some of which were rather brutal. My scans revealed numerous healed fractures to her legs, one arm, and at least ten ribs. She also suffered from a cracked skull at one point and is covered in scars."

James frowned. "You don't think somebody was hurting her, do you? If so, we need to keep her safe from whatever douche bag might be out there."

Shepard laid his hand on James's shoulder. "I agree and we will, James, that I can promise you. Apart from what she needs, though, I still need answers. We need to talk to her and soon. When will she wake up?"

Kaidan answered that question. "I only gave her a small dose. She'll be up soon."

"Okay," Steve replied before turning to Shepard. "Would you share the details of her part in your vision? I'd like to be of some help in all this."

"You always are," Shepard replied sincerely, smiling softly at the pilot. "Good suggestion. Grab a beer, fellas, and I'll tell you what I saw."


	2. Connect

**Connect**

**Shepard's apartment, the Citadel**

The pain was gone, its departure stirring Abby from her sleep. She opened her eyes cautiously, uncertain of what would greet her.

She knew she was in someone's home, though it was more luxurious and different from anything she'd ever seen before. As she studied the smoothness of the furniture around her, the perfect curves of the small table by the bedside, the graceful shape of the torch that gave light without a flame, she realized there was only one place she could be that would hold such wondrous things.

"Maker, thank you for your mercy," she whispered reverently, her heart humbled that she would find refuge within His holy city.

She slowly sat up, expecting to feel sore or stiff from her injuries, but smiled softly when she understood there was no pain. Glancing down at her arms and legs, she felt a flutter of embarrassment that she was disrobed, and was only covered by her underclothes. With a gasp, she saw that her injuries were healed, the magenta blotches that peppered her skin the only evidence left of them.

Her bare feet touched the smooth floor, the wood beneath her toes marvelously buffed, gleaming like a polished stone. Biting her lip, she knelt and touched it, her fingers following the perfect swirls and curve of the wood grain. Nothing, not even the most beautiful piece of Dalish artwork, could compare with the grace of this floor.

She rose and moved from object to object. Tentatively, she studied the near-blinding light that was produced by the small torch on a bureau, finally, carefully, holding her hand over its shining source.

"No heat," she marveled and gingerly put her fingertip to it. "It didn't burn me," she muttered, studying the small torch. "Maker, this place is astonishing."

She drew a deep breath and noticed there was no scent to the air, no smell of wood, food or animal. She peered around a corner and noticed clothing in a tidy space, and she felt the fabric, free of imperfections and even seams. Did all in this holy place enjoy such riches? Even she, the daughter of a very rich man had never felt material as fine and skillfully woven as this.

It was then that an idea struck her.

"He's a spirit," she whispered, thinking of the mysterious man. "He's one of the Maker's chosen!"

Understanding blossomed in her heart and she knew that the memory of her arrival here was not false. It was _he_ who had knelt by her side, he who'd healed her and brought her to this marvelous place. The beings and other men she'd seen must also be the Maker's creations and she…

She was dead.

Looking around her, she noticed a modest sized robe of black, shining material, and could not resist taking it from its place. It felt wonderful and cool against her fingers and instinctively she pulled it on, pleased to be able to cover some of her body, though it slipped off her shoulder, revealing more skin than she'd have preferred. Still, her modesty was mostly satisfied, and she left the small room, returning to the main one.

She noticed a break in the pattern on the wall and moved toward it, realizing it was an exit from the room. Her confidence bolstered by her knowledge that she was in the Maker's holy place, she smiled softly and boldly stepped through.

~o~O~o~

James saw her first, a glimpse of long blonde hair and black fabric flutter past the side doorway of the kitchen.

"Commander?" he said quietly, gesturing toward the hall. "I think she's up."

Everyone in the kitchen turned to see the young woman emerge from the hall and step down into the well by the couches. She moved quickly toward the outside of the apartment where she then slowed, approaching the floor-to-ceiling windows with caution, a hand raised to touch the glass.

Kaidan began to go after her, but Shepard caught his eye, shaking his head. They watched as she placed her hand against the glass; it was obvious she was fascinated by it.

Shepard moved quietly out of the kitchen and gestured for the others to remain. When he neared the fireplace, he hesitated, not wishing to scare her.

"Hello," he said in as gentle a tone as he could muster.

"Please. How does this work?" she asked, her accent immediately familiar to him. She didn't wait for his answer, or look at him before she spoke again. "I thought perhaps I could move it, that it was a veil of some sort, but it's hard."

"It's called glass," he answered.

"We have glass at home, but it's nothing like this," she replied, running her fingers over the smooth surface. "Ours is all colored and is bumpy and it's in tiny little pieces, at least, compared to this. Artists will use them in a large frame to make wonderful pictures, the smaller parts making a whole, but this is amazing."

"Where is home?"

"Highever," she answered, finally turning to face him, her blue eyes meeting his.

"And where is Highever?"

"Ferelden. This is the Golden City?" she asked. "And you've brought me here?"

"This is the Citadel," he said, watching her carefully. "I'm not sure how you got here."

"The Citadel? That means it's a fortress? After what the magisters did, I suppose that makes good sense," she reasoned, smiling gently. "As for how I got here, well, I killed the Archdemon. The rest, I suppose, is the Maker's doing. And yours."

"Mine?"

"Of course," she replied. "I've seen you in my dreams and I knew you would help us. I just didn't understand until now. May I ask, what sort of spirit are you?"

"You've seen me?" Shepard arched an eyebrow, looking over his shoulder at his companions, who were watching. He looked back at her. "I'm not sure I understand."

"Justice? Honor? Fortitude?" she elaborated. "I hope it's not too impertinent of me to ask. Wynne explained that there are many of you and that if we're truly blessed, we may have the aid of a being such as yourself. Thank you."

"Unless there's a spirit of hard-ass, you're outta luck," Joker said, rolling his eyes.

"Lieutenant, now isn't the time," Shepard snapped, his tone hard enough to make the Normandy's pilot blanch. He met her eyes again. "You said you've seen me in your dreams?" At that moment, Kaidan and Steve arrived at Shepard's side, flanking him.

The pretty blonde nodded. "Yes. Twice. You came during the worst of them, when the very eyes of the Archdemon seemed to fall on me and I was paralyzed with my fear of it. You rallied me with your call and saved me," she explained, pointing to his chest plate. "Your symbol is the same, as is your voice. It was you and I'm grateful."

"Do you mean the commander's N7?" Kaidan asked, looking at the battered emblem on Shepard's armor.

"Yes."

"You said that before, Archdemon, isn't that what you called it?" Shepard began. "What is that, what do you mean?"

"In this Blight it was a dragon," she replied.

Joker snorted. "A dragon? What, like Puff?"

"Joker," Shepard growled, a clear warning to the pilot in his tone. He cleared his throat and met Abby's eyes. "Okay, I'm not sure I fully understand. What's a Blight?"

A soft frown came over her features and she seemed to watch him for a moment before replying. "How is it you don't know what a Blight is?"

Shepard realized his question was poorly timed. He needed to gain her trust without revealing he didn't fully understand why they were finally meeting. She seemed comfortable with him, to believe he was a _friend_, for lack of a better term. He chose to return to less invasive questions.

"What's your name?"

"Lady Abigail Cousland, daughter of the Teyrn of Highever and a Grey Warden," she answered, her chin lifting slightly in pride as she did. "May I ask, ser, how I should I address you?"

"I'm Commander Adam Shepard, Alliance Navy and captain of the SSV Normandy. It's a pleasure to meet you, finally, Lady Cousland."

"Please, if you'll excuse the informality, I'd like you to call me Abby," she replied, blushing slightly. "I'm humbled to be in your presence, ser. To be standing amongst the Maker's first…" she paused, seeming to search for words. "Forgive me, I had never imagined such a thing."

Shepard nodded, glancing at Steve briefly, and the man arched an eyebrow.

"Adam," Steve began in a low voice. "I don't think you're going to be able to keep the truth from her. You don't understand what she thinks you are and if she thinks you're lying..."

"This could go south and fast, right," Shepard agreed with a soft sigh. He met Abby's eyes again and stepped closer to her. "Abby, I'm sorry, but I'm not a spirit. I'm a man and I don't believe I had anything to do with your arrival here."

Abby's smile slipped. "Of course you did," she argued. "Spirit or not, you led me here."

"How _did_ you get here?" Shepard asked quickly. "Do you know?"

"It's simple. I'm dead."

"You think you're dead?" Kaidan asked softly, his eyes darting to Dr. Chakwas who had also quietly ventured from the kitchen.

"I _know_ I am, ser," Abby replied confidently. "The only way to slay the Archdemon is with the death of a warden, otherwise the tainted deity would simply move from one darkspawn to the next. I dealt the final blow, it died on my father's blade."

"And then what?" Shepard inquired. "Do you remember dying?"

"I remember the burst of energy and being thrown high above the beast and the tower. I felt its power slam into my body and then…" she paused, studying Shepard. "Then I heard you again and finally, I saw your face."

James and Joker were standing near the piano, listening to her story. Dr. Chakwas slowly approached Abby, her movements calm and deliberate.

"Commander, if I may?" the doctor asked. Shepard gave a curt nod and Chakwas turned to Abby. "Abby, I am Dr. Chakwas and I treated your injuries. I agree they were severe, but I assure you that you're far from dead."

Abby's back went straight as a lance. "Madam, if you assisted me then I owe you my gratitude, but I assure you, I did not survive my encounter with the dragon."

Chakwas pursed her lips but didn't argue. Instead, she looked pointedly at the commander.

"Abby, answer something for me, will you?" Shepard began. "What year is it?"

Again, she watched him with slight uncertainty. "It's 9:31."

Shepard sighed, put his hands on his hips and moved to the massive windows. She came to stand next to him. "Abby, I'm not sure what's going on, but you've seen me before and I'll tell you, you've been in my own dreams. I know, though I'm not sure how, that you and I have something we must do together. Will you let me show you something? Do you trust me?"

She glanced over her shoulder at the others watching their conversation. "Are these your companions? Do they travel with you?"

"They do, they're good, capable people," he replied evenly. "Abby. I think I know where we can start to figure this out, but I need your trust."

Their gaze locked and he felt anxiety begin to bubble in his belly, her eyes revealing nothing.

"Then you have it, Commander."

**The Normandy**

Shepard stepped into the med bay, which had been taken over by Mordin during his research into a cure for the genophage. The salarian scientist didn't look up from his station when Shepard entered, and the commander gave Eve a nod of greeting as he moved to Mordin's side, waiting patiently until the doctor was ready to talk.

"Shepard," said Mordin, his hands moving in a blur over his console. "Problem? Development? Wrex ready to give tissue sample?"

"No, I just wanted to show you something."

"Related to genophage?"

"Well, no. Not really. I thought you could use a break from that," Shepard said in his most charming voice.

Mordin glanced sidelong at Shepard. "Tone of voice suggests soliciting of _favour. _Would not interrupt genophage work for trivial reason."

Shepard shrugged and held out Abby's rumpled leather armor, which Mordin prodded.

"Animal hide of some kind. Not amphibian. Not reptilian. Perhaps-"

"It's cured leather."

"Earth bovine species?" asked Mordin, and Shepard nodded. "If material is known, what is nature of query?"

Shepard leaned against Mordin's console and laid the armor down. "I'm sure you've heard, but a lady supposedly appeared from nowhere and is currently staying at my apartment, under Dr. Chakwas's care. She was wearing this get-up when we found her."

Mordin nodded. "Yes. Human female found on Citadel. Had heard. Much speculation surrounding her origin. Rumours of time travel." He shook his head and quietly snorted. "Preposterous."

"That's what I thought, but time travel doesn't even come close. How about inter-dimensional travel? Alternate realities?"

"Please." Mordin rolled his eyes and returned his attention to his console.

"She's definitely human – Dr. Chakwas's scans confirmed that – but she claims she's not from Earth, or else a place on Earth I've never heard of."

"Many humans not from Earth. Colony-raised, space-born, many possibilities. Being Earth-born not prerequisite for humans."

"She says she's from the kingdom of Ferelden, in the realm of Thedas," said Shepard, smiling as Mordin's brow bone rose.

"No, no, not Earth. Other planet. Perhaps uncharted one."

"I'm not sure she even understands the concept of 'planets'. All she knew was this… Ferelden. That was her whole world."

"Fabrication, perhaps?" Mordin speculated. "Subterfuge to conceal true intentions?"

Shepard held his hands up, shaking his head. "I don't think she's lying – she doesn't seem like the sort. Besides, I really think she _believes _what she's saying."

Mordin turned fully to face Shepard, a finger at his chin. "Why special interest? Not your usual response to such an… absurd claim. No, usual response would be to dismiss as equine faeces."

Shepard sighed and took a minute to answer. "I dreamed about her."

Mordin shrugged. "Not unexpected. Arrival of female has generated much interest and speculation."

"No… I don't mean recently. I mean _before_ I met her. I first dreamed about her in 2183, when we encountered the prothean beacon."

"On Eden Prime?" Mordin frowned and again turned to Shepard, who pursed his lips and nodded.

"And before you ask, I'm _certain _it was her. No doubts."

Mordin saw the assuredness and determination in Shepard's eyes, and knew better than to impugn the commander's assertion, though he remained sceptical. He nodded and moved to Abby's armor, which Shepard had laid out on a neighbouring examination table.

"She was wearing that," Shepard said again, unnecessarily. "According to EDI, light armor of this type was used extensively on Earth's European continent during the Middle Ages. It was used for hunting and by those who needed to move quickly and silently, like thieves and assassins. Our guest was also carrying a weapon which James says is a primitive version of the omni bows they have in the armory."

"Go on," prompted Mordin, his full attention on Shepard.

Shepard's mouth twisted into a wry smile. "She believes that I'm an agent of a deity known as the Maker."

"Am scientist, Shepard, not storyteller," said Mordin in irritation. "Have work to do. _Important_ work." He went to turn back to his console but was blocked by Shepard's arm.

"Dr. Chakwas also has proof that our lady is over a thousand years old."

"Impossible. Human lifespan-" His words were cut off as Shepard thrust a datapad into his hand, and Mordin's expression veered between astonishment and disbelief as he read Chakwas's findings.

Silently, he laid down the datapad and paused for a moment before returning to Abby's armor. "Will conduct extensive tests on material and blood," he said, pointing to a red stain on the bodice. _"Could _use break from genophage work. Short one, of course," he amended with a glance at Eve.

"Thank you," Shepard said sincerely, moving to the door. "Let me know as soon as you have anything."

Mordin nodded. "Will contact you."

"Oh, there's one more thing, Doc. She also dreamed about me before we met."

Mordin looked up and frowned before shooing Shepard away with his hand.

~o~O~o~

Shepard didn't have to wait long to hear from Dr. Solus. The efficient salarian had summoned him only a couple of hours after they'd spoken, stating that he'd found something _interesting _in Abby's DNA profile.

When Shepard arrived, however, he found not only Mordin but Dr. Chakwas waiting for him.

"Commander," said Chakwas, waving him to a chair. "Dr. Solus and I have combined our findings on Lady Cousland's ancestry. We've discovered something quite remarkable."

"Is this something I _need_ to sit down for?" Shepard asked as he took a seat, crossing a leg over the other.

Chakwas glanced at Mordin, who activated his omni-tool, bringing up an image full of randomised black and white squares and bars.

"What's this?" Shepard asked.

"DNA profile of Abigail Cousland," said Mordin, waving a hand across the screen. "Shepard, Dr. Chakwas, you share 99.9% of DNA with each other, as well as all other humans, living or dead. Including Abigail Cousland."

Shepard nodded. "Okay…"

Chakwas stepped forward and stood at the side of the screen opposite to Mordin. "The other 0.1% is what provides us with our individual traits, such as eye colour, gender, height, sexual orientation, inherited diseases and so on," she explained. "It also contains the genetic information we inherit from our parents. However, we do not inherit _all _of our parents' DNA. We inherit something from everyone who has gone before us. Our grandparents, _their _grandparents, and going back several generations – perhaps hundreds or even thousands of years back."

"Yes, yes, yes," said Mordin impatiently. "But 0.1% also contains vestigial or redundant markers. Markers copied, over and over and over through generations. Mutations form in redundant markers. Inherited by offspring."

Shepard held up a hand. "Slow down, Doc. You've lost me."

"What Mordin is trying to say," said Chakwas, "is that each of us have sectors on our individual DNA profile which serve no obvious function. They may have been needed at some point in our history, but no longer." She waited for Shepard to absorb that information before resuming. "When we inherit some or all of these redundant 'markers' from our parents, occasionally something is lost or altered. Imagine an artist making a reproduction of a piece of artwork. No matter how skilful the artist, the reproduction will not be_ identical_. Each time the piece is reproduced, more anomalies appear. Even a digital copy is not always exact. Only a single pixel needs to be out."

"So… a single 'pixel' difference on someone's DNA map would be a mutation?" Shepard asked.

Chakwas nodded. "Precisely. That mutation would then be passed down to subsequent generations, providing a unique link which connects them with their ancestors."

"So Abby has a mutation in her DNA? That doesn't sound good."

"No. You misunderstand," Mordin stated. "Mutations not necessarily good or bad, unless mutation causes psychosis, cancer, birth defects… so many variables possible."

"Are you saying Abby has cancer?" Shepard demanded. "We can cure it, right? It's not some ancient form we know nothing about?"

Chakwas shook her head. "No, Commander, that was just an example. Cancer _is _caused by mutated DNA, but we've found nothing sinister on Abby's DNA map. Very often, mutations have no discernible effect on an individual."

Shepard exhaled and sat back in his chair. "All right. I'm not really sure where this is going."

"Dr. Solus, if you would?" Chakwas prompted, and Mordin entered a command into his omni-tool, which magnified a section of Abby's DNA map.

"Mutation in mitochondrial DNA, inherited from mother. Unique to bloodline and passed down if Lady Cousland produces offspring. Mutation also shared with siblings."

"My preliminary scan and examination of Abby revealed that she has never given birth, so has no children to pass her DNA on to," Chakwas clarified. "However, this mutation _has _been passed down by someone, indicating that she has one or more brothers or sisters."

"How do you know that?" Shepard asked. "Passed down to whom?"

A fleeting look passed between the two doctors and Mordin entered another instruction, bringing up a second screen with an exact copy of the pattern of Abby's mutated gene. "Identical match," said Mordin, "meaning shared ancestry between Abigail Cousland and…" He cleared his throat.

The screen zoomed out, and both doctors remained silent as Shepard read the identity of the second person.

_Adam Shepard, male, human, 1/11/2154 CE, Sol._

He silently gawked at the information for a long moment before finally standing and moving closer to the screens. _"What?" _he exclaimed in disbelief.

"It means that you and Abby share a common ancestor," Chakwas explained. "You cannot possibly be her brother – even if time travel _were_ possible, your DNA does not indicate such a close relationship. Siblings share as much as 75% of the 0.1% with each other, even more so than their parents. In other words, one's closest relation in DNA terms is their brother or sister. You and Abby are not that closely related."

"Just… give me a minute here." Shepard slowly moved back to the chair and slumped down in it before leaning forward and resting his chin on his hand. "You're saying we're _related? _That's ridiculous!"

"It would seem so, and yet there is the proof," said Chakwas. "Dr. Solus and I have been quite thorough. There is no mistake."

"All right, I wasn't accusing you of making a mistake. If anyone else was telling me this, I'd laugh at them. I just-I don't see how…"

"Time travel _not _possible," Mordin muttered. "Some other explanation."

"We've been having quite the debate," Chakwas said. "I'm not willing to discount anything at this stage, although the concept of time travel is rather far-fetched."

"So you're saying we're related but we're not brother and sister. What, then?" Shepard asked with scepticism in his voice. "Is she supposed to be my great-grandmother or something?"

Mordin waved a dismissive hand through the air. "No. Not possible. Not enough similarities in base pairs. Similar to brother and sister explanation. _Not _that closely related."

"The mutation was inherited from Lady Cousland's mother," explained Chakwas. "As Abby has no children, it must have been passed down by one of her siblings. Which makes _you_ her great-nephew, more than fifty times over."

"That can't be," Shepard refuted. "There must be someone else with the same mutation in their genes. It's just coincidence."

Mordin shook his head. "Mutations as unique as human fingerprints, patterns of iris. Same mutation in two different families even more unlikely than concept of time travel. Laughable notion."

"But… are you sure about this?" Shepard asked, his tone hushed.

"Quite sure," answered Chakwas confidently. "As you know, all humans undergo some form of gene therapy when they are infants to remove some of those markers which would tend the individual toward certain diseases, et cetera. Lady Cousland has had no such work done on her DNA profile. And the mutation you share with her is on a redundant marker, which is why it was not altered during your own gene therapy, or by Cerberus during Project Lazarus. The mutation has not been tampered with in any way. Both of you were born with it. There is no doubt about it – you _are _related, and the most likely relationship is nephew and great-aunt."

"Fifty times over?" Shepard scrubbed his face and sighed, considering his next response. He was not a man who was easily flustered, but for just a moment he was lost for words. After a short pause, however, he donned what Steve called his 'Commander's Hat' and went straight into problem-solving mode. He stood up and once again moved to the screen.

"I just defeated my own clone. What's to say this isn't another of Cerberus's half-baked plans? Could Abby have been constructed from my DNA?"

"No, Commander," Chakwas said decisively. "You are descended from her, not the other way around. And I strongly doubt Cerberus would have existed in Abby's time."

Shepard nodded. "All right. How did you even know to compare our DNA?"

"They didn't," answered EDI, joining the conversation. "When the mutation was found, I saw a match with your own DNA profile and presented Dr. Solus with the salient information."

"Without EDI, we wouldn't have known," Chakwas agreed. "We had no reason to compare Abby's DNA with any of the crews'."

"Who's a clever AI?" Shepard quipped.

"I am," boasted EDI before the comm. was cut.

"Okay," Shepard said. "You've discovered that somehow Abby and I are related. Now we need to know how she got here, and why. It's becoming clear that this was no random occurrence."

"That's a different prospect altogether," replied Chakwas thoughtfully. "Researching her DNA was a snap in comparison – we had all the facts to hand, we merely needed to consolidate them. Dr. Solus and I might not be able to offer you more than guesses when it comes to how and why she's here."

Shepard shook his head. "Mordin, you've done more than enough, and I'm grateful, but I need you back working on the genophage. The situation on Palaven's growing more desperate by the hour."

"Agreed," said Mordin. "Will be here if Dr. Chakwas is in need of assistance, but must make genophage priority."

"Then I will do all I can, Commander," Chakwas promised. "I rather enjoy a challenge."

Shepard nodded once. "Thank you, both of you. Now I need to get back to the apartment – Abby needs a change of clothing. Liara's provided me with some things that should fit, and hopefully won't be too 'alien' looking. Do you think I should tell Abby about all this?" he asked Chakwas.

The human doctor folded her arms and frowned. "She _should _be informed, but not yet. From your description, she was severely traumatised before Major Alenko administered the sedative. When she awoke, she was no longer alarmed because she believed she was dead and in a 'Golden City', which seems to be an allegorical reference to the afterlife, or heaven. You might have convinced her that you are not a spirit or apostle of her 'Maker', but she still believes she resides in this Golden City. Sooner or later, Commander, you will have to tell her the truth. And you will have to show her evidence of that truth.

I advise extreme caution with how much you expose her to and how quickly. She's an intelligent woman and will not be able to deny what she's seeing or hearing once provided with proof. Just consider how vastly different our world, our culture, will be from hers – and we know very little about that as it is. Find out more about her and I'm sure you will make the right decisions. But don't overload the poor girl's mind before she's ready. That's my advice, Commander."

"It's good advice, and I'll take it," said Shepard gratefully. "Doctor, I'd like you to accompany me back to the apartment and talk to her while I have a meeting with Kaidan, Steve and James – they're already at the apartment with Abby."

"Indeed," Chakwas said. "What will the purpose of the meeting be?"

"I want Abby on the Normandy. There are too many distractions and people coming and going at the apartment. I want her in quarters, where we can keep an eye on her and give her a peaceful environment. Well, as peaceful as possible, considering we're at war. We just need to figure out how to get her off the Strip and on to the Normandy without it being a complete shock to her system."

"You'll figure something out," Chakwas encouraged. "Why don't I take Liara's clothing up to Abby and have a girls' chat with her, find out what I can, while you and the others make plans?"

Shepard smiled and activated his omni-tool. "Good thinking, Doctor. Traynor – Dr. Chakwas and I are taking a shuttle to the apartment. I want to know immediately if there are any developments on Palaven or Tuchanka."

"Understood, Commander."

~o~O~o~

When Shepard arrived at the apartment with Dr. Chakwas, he was surprised and concerned to find the entrance door locked. Arching an eyebrow, he reached for the entrance sensor and waited until the security screen flickered, and James's face appeared.

"Oh, Commander, it's you. Just a sec."

"Everything okay, James?" Shepard asked as the door opened and the marine waved them in, saluting Shepard once the doors had closed.

"Everything's good, sir. No, it's just that… we had a few 'wellwishers' show up, who turned out to be the press, so I told 'em to get lost."

"I appreciate it," said Shepard with a slap to the other man's back. "How's she been?"

"Well as can be expected. We got her somethin' to eat – the major fried a steak with a few onions and stuff. She's never heard of coffee – you believe that? So she had water. Then we found some tea. She's drunk a shitload of that," he chuckled. "Esteban showed her around the apartment, but kept her away from the back where your terminal is. Mighta taken a bit of explaining. She's askin' a lot of questions, but we told her it's best to wait for you, and that you wouldn't be long. She's doin' okay."

"Where is she now?" asked Chakwas.

"Upstairs with Esteban. He found some clean slacks of Shepard's for her to put on. They're a little baggy, but they cover her legs. I think they're lookin' at the pictures on the walls now. She needs a shower," he whispered. "I know you cleaned her up, Doc, but she's got all blood and dirt in her hair. Glad you're here, actually. None of us wanted to suggest it in case she thought we were bein' inappropriate."

"I'll see to that," said Dr. Chakwas. "I have some clean clothing for her. I'll send Lieutenant Cortez down to you." With a nod, she headed for the stairs.

Shepard reached for Vega's hand and shook it. "Thanks for what you've done. Where's Kaidan?"

"Out back."

"Come on, then. We need to figure out how to get Abby on to the Normandy without freaking her out."

~o~O~o~

"We _could _give her a sedative again," Kaidan suggested with a grimace, "but I'm guessing that would be a last resort."

"Right," Shepard agreed. "We're trying to gain her trust and that's not the way we'll do it."

"Sorry," Kaidan offered.

Shepard held up a hand. "Don't be. I'll entertain any ideas any of you have. Keep 'em coming."

Cortez leaned forward and stared at the poker table for a minute, deep in thought. "If I could land the Kodiak real close to the apartment building, say right by the doors, we could get her in there without her seeing all the bright lights and sky cars. I think that's what really frightened her the last time."

"Not to mention the tons of people who don't look like _us_," James added, thumbing at his chest. "Imagine seeing a krogan for the first time? Or a salarian?"

"I think she saw a few non-humans when she first woke up, but she hasn't mentioned them since," Shepard stated. "Maybe she thought she was dreaming, I don't know. But James is right – she needs as few surprises as possible right now. I think Steve's on to something."

"But _could _you land the Kodiak that close?" Kaidan asked the pilot. "That's kind of a tight squeeze."

"I can do it," Steve confirmed with a nod. "The only obstacle would be C-Sec. I might need permission to land in an undesignated area."

"They'll give a Spectre permission," Shepard declared. "What about when Abby's in the Kodiak? How do we minimise her exposure?"

"I bring down the shutters," Cortez replied. "I don't need them up to fly. We're gonna need to keep her out back, though, and away from my console."

Kaidan gave a brief snort. "Yeah, all that tech'd be a real head trip for her. Okay, so I'll sit with Cortez in the cockpit, and Shepard, Vega and the doc stay in the back with her until we embark. Everyone okay with that?"

The other three men nodded. "What about when she's aboard the Normandy?" asked James. "I mean, she's gonna see a whole lot of tech once she's there."

Kaidan shrugged. "Sure, unless we blindfold her, she's going to see things, but she's seeing things in the apartment right now. Regardless, we need to make sure she's not overwhelmed."

"Port Observation Lounge," Shepard said. "I'll have a few people make up quarters in there for her, and I'll have Traynor inform the crew that it's being used as a private suite." He sat back and sighed. "The shutters will need to stay down in there for the time being, but I'll have to talk to her, tell her a few things – she can't stay in there forever. Let's just get her there first, though, and take it from there. We all up for this?"

"Yes, sir," answered Shepard's friends in unison.

Shepard stood up. "Okay. I'll make the arrangements with C-Sec. Once we're cleared with them, Steve and Kaidan will go down and prep the Kodiak. When Abby's ready to leave, I want you two already in the cockpit, and the doors closed, when James and I bring her aboard."

"Understood," said Steve, rising with the rest of them.

~o~O~o~

Shepard finished making the necessary arrangements for Abby's trip to the Normandy and climbed the stairs to his suite. He entered the seating area outside of his bedroom where Kaidan, James and Steve were talking quietly.

"Hey, Shepard, I think she's nearly ready," Steve began. "I hope you don't mind, but I let her use your bathroom. Chakwas said Abby seemed a little uncertain about using the shower, so I suggested she take her up to the Jacuzzi."

"It didn't occur to me, but I guess indoor plumbing may be a new concept for her," Shepard replied, his thoughts on Mordin's revelations that Abby was his ancestor. "If Abby's as old as the doctors say she is, there'll be a lot of things that she'll be uncertain about."

At that moment, Chakwas joined the group, sitting down next to James with a soft smile. "Before you ask, Commander, yes, she's finished bathing. I've shown her how to use the bathroom and basic toiletries, some of which I'm certain she believes I'm lying about."

James grinned. "Lying? Which ones?"

"The sonic toothbrush, for starters," the doctor shared, her smile still in place. "When I explained it to her, she was very curious and tried it briefly; the look on her face when it turned on was absolutely priceless. The poor dear practically threw it back at me!"

The others laughed but Shepard crossed his arms, his countenance thoughtful.

"Was she angry?" he asked. "Scared?"

"No, not in the least. Actually, I think she was a little embarrassed once she knew it wouldn't hurt her," Chakwas replied. "I like her, Commander. She's polite, composed, and even when throwing a toothbrush, there's a grace about her. The idea of her being in combat... well, had I not seen the injuries myself, I don't know if I'd believe it."

"She's a lady," James said defensively. "Aren't ladies supposed to act like that? All soft and, you know, beautiful?"

"I think the doc said Abby had _grace_, James," Steve argued with a shake of his head.

"Right, that's what I meant," the marine replied, flushing slightly. "Anyway, all I was saying is I agree with the doc. Abby seems like she's pretty nice."

A quiet beep sounded on the major's omni-tool and Kaidan looked at the commander. "Traynor says they're ready back at the ship."

"Good. Well, James, nice or not, let's get her back to the Normandy," Shepard said firmly. "I'm all for getting to know her, and I absolutely want her to feel safe and welcome, but we still have a lot of questions that need answers. The sooner we can get her moved, the better."

"I look forward to it," Abby announced, standing near the end of the hallway. James stood up and everyone else turned to face her as she continued. "I should very much like to see your ship, Commander. It's been some time since I've been aboard a vessel, but it's something I used to enjoy as a girl."

She moved toward them, her hair washed and combed back, a long plait over her shoulder.

"Thank you, Commander, for your hospitality. Your home is filled with wonders," she said with a smile, looking around her. "I'd never imagined having such luxuries. Thank you for sharing them with me." She met Dr. Chakwas's eyes and adjusted the jacket she was wearing. "Doctor, I hope that I'm acceptable? I believe I'm wearing everything as you explained."

Chakwas rose and nodded. "You are indeed."

Abby drew a breath and turned to Shepard. "Then, I, ser, am at your disposal, and ready to depart at your direction."


	3. Discovery

Travelling to the Normandy had proven remarkably easy, and Shepard was grateful for their thorough planning. Abby had sat quietly in the back of the Kodiak, her eyes intense but her manner calm. If spoken to, she answered softly, and had seemed at ease, though James observed that she held the small arm of her seat with a white-knuckled grip. She'd caught him watching her and, realizing he'd seen the tension in her hands, had carefully moved them to her lap.

She did not look up again.

Once aboard the ship, she had silently followed Shepard up to the lounge which had already been converted for her use.

As requested, Traynor had dropped the shutters over the massive floor-to-ceiling window that dominated that room. A small but comfortable bed was tucked into the far corner and somehow the resourceful specialist had managed to procure some additional clothing for their guest. It was all hung neatly in the area near Abby's bed.

Kaidan left them to speak with Mordin, but James and Steve lingered while Shepard explained the basics of the room. After showing her how to dim the lights and use the door – but deliberately avoiding the shutter controls – he shared with her a small collection of poetry books, replicas that Liara had asked Traynor to pass along.

He'd been hesitant to give her anything that could highlight the differences between her world and theirs, but the note he'd received on his omni-tool assured him that the paper items were what Abby would have accessed. The Asari scientist advised him she'd carefully chosen the titles to be as non-specific as possible and Abby had seemed delighted to receive them.

Hours later, as the day drew to a close, James and Steve departed, leaving Shepard and Abby to speak alone. He'd had an update from Mordin that the genophage cure would be ready very soon and needed to prepare Abby for the possibility that he would be on a mission before they could begin to learn more about their connection.

The blonde woman sat on the other end of the couch, her hands folded neatly on her lap as she listened to his reasons for his impending departure.

"Are we underway now?"

Shepard nodded. "We are. We'll be arriving soon and when the time comes, I'll need to meet with the leaders and help them with their fight. I'm sorry, I know we need to talk, but I've given my word and the Krogan people have given theirs. The war we're fighting can't succeed without their strength."

"I understand, truly I do. My fellow warden and I travelled throughout my homeland bringing other races together, others without whom our cause would have been lost. You must see to your duty, Commander. Do not apologize to me for doing so."

With a sigh, he stood. "I'm glad you understand my circumstances, Abby. I don't want to leave you here waiting, but you're right, this isn't a duty I can ignore. I promise you that we'll talk more once I return."

"I will be here. Thank you for explaining," she replied. She paused, then, seeming to consider his words. "You _did_ say we're underway, did you not?"

"I did."

She shook her head, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Simply amazing, ser, I feel no motion at all. I only hear a soft hum. I expect your ship is more of a marvel than your home, Commander."

"While I'm gone, would you be comfortable with lieutenants Cortez and Vega checking in on you? I expect Dr. Chakwas will as well."

"Certainly, I enjoyed their company and should be glad to have it again."

"Good. I'm glad to hear that," he replied, touching the door which instantly slid open. "Try and get some rest. If you need anything, just use the small communicator I gave you earlier. I'll come and see you as soon as I return."

"Thank you," she said softly, blinking several times. "Maker watch over you, Commander."

**xXx**

Later that day, Shepard was seated on the foot of the bed in his cabin, half a dozen datapads scattered around him, when a cup of coffee was pushed under his nose.

"Thanks," he said with a grateful smile, moving the datapads out of the way so Steve could sit beside him.

"Hell of a day," commented Cortez as he started to unzip one of his boots.

Shepard took a sip of coffee and rubbed the back of his neck with a groan. "Which of them aren't?"

Steve set his own coffee down. "Need a hand with that?"

"You don't need to ask twice," Shepard said softly, turning his back on Cortez, and Steve moved his hands to Shepard's shoulders, gently kneading the tense muscles.

"Abby seems to likes you," Shepard said.

"Ah, I think she realised pretty quickly that we weren't a threat to her."

"I agree with that, but she's taken quite a shine to you. Will you do something for me, Steve?"

"Anything, you know that."

"Well, Mordin's getting close to finishing his cure, and pretty soon I'll be heading for Tuchanka. We're already en route. Once you've dropped me off…"

"You want me to keep an eye on her?"

"Would you?"

Steve laughed. "Of course. I'm sure James will, too. He's taken quite a shine to _her."_

Shepard turned back to Steve, who paused his massage. "In what way?"

Steve shrugged and stroked Shepard's neck with his thumbs. "You know."

"He likes her? As in _likes_ her?"

"I think so. He doesn't turn bright red when I enter a room, that's for sure."

"Huh." Shepard again turned slightly away from Steve and relaxed against the pilot's chest, releasing a sigh. "You probably won't believe this, but Mordin and Chakwas found out I'm related to Abby."

Steve's hands stilled and he took a minute to answer. "Come again?"

"I know, right? It took me a bit to get my head around, too. Here, look." He activated his omni-tool and showed the doctors' findings to Steve, doing his best to repeat what they'd told him. By the time he'd finished explaining, the two men were facing each other, side by side.

"That's insane," Steve mumbled. "There's absolutely no way they're mistaken?"

"Those two? Are you kidding?"

Steve blew out a breath and frowned. "You know, James made a comment about you two looking alike, your colouring, especially your noses, but… I can't believe it."

"Crazy universe we live in, huh?"

Steve nodded. "Does Abby know?"

"Not yet, and neither does anyone else except the doctors and us. I figured I'd let Abby have one peaceful night before I dump all that on her. How am I going to explain what we're doing here, that soon we'll be orbiting a planet she's never heard of? Hell, I don't think she even knows which planet _she's _from. How do I explain the Reapers?" He shook his head and sipped at his coffee.

"Don't," Steve advised, and Shepard gave him a confused look. "Just explain one thing, maybe… what the Normandy is, that we're able to fly through the stars. You don't need to go into mass effect fields or eezo or multicore shielding, just reveal one thing. Then let her ask questions and answer them as honestly as you can. That way, _she _controls the flow of information instead of being bombarded with it all at once."

Shepard gave Steve a fond smile. "Well, now you're _definitely_ looking after her while I'm gone."

"I'd be happy to."

At that moment, Shepard's omni-tool pinged and he sighed before activating it. "Shepard here."

Dr Solus's face appeared on a small screen. "Shepard. Am in War Room with turian and krogan delegates. Need you here."

"Is there a problem?"

"No, no problem. Have synthesised genophage cure."

Shepard drew a sharp breath and straightened up. "Be right there." He quickly tapped his omni-tool. "Joker, ETA on Tuchanka?"

"'Bout an hour and a half, Commander."

"Can you shave any off of that?"

A short pause followed. "I can get you there in fifty minutes."

"Do it. Garrus, Kaidan, shuttle bay in–" He looked at Steve.

Recognising that Shepard had now donned his Commander's Hat, Steve pulled his boot back on, quickly stood and knocked back the rest of his coffee before setting his cup down. "I'll have her ready in thirty."

"Thirty minutes," Shepard finished before deactivating his omni-tool. As Steve turned to leave, Shepard stood up and touched his arm. "We'll have that uninterrupted evening someday, I promise."

"Just keep yourself safe. That's all I ask." Steve stepped close to Shepard and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"Anything for you, you know that," replied Shepard, smudging Steve's lower lip with his thumb.

"Good."

They shared a brief smile before stepping out of Shepard's cabin and into the elevator.

**xXx**

The timbre of the ship's hum changed and Abby, who was seated on a couch, laid aside the book she'd been trying to distract herself with to concentrate on the altered sound. Standing, she crossed the room and laid her palm against the hull, wondering briefly if they'd arrived at their location.

Quietly she offered a short yet humble prayer to the Maker, asking that he guide the commander and his companions in their actions and bless their mission with success. But her prayer reminded her of her circumstances and she sighed.

It had been easy to distract herself with her extraordinary surroundings, her curiosity constant, but now, left to her own devices for the night, she was finding it very difficult not to wonder what her arrival here and her connection to Shepard all meant.

Despite Dr. Chakwas's assurances to the contrary, Abby would not accept that she was alive. Even _if_ her Order was wrong - something she couldn't fathom given the history of the Blights - and she'd somehow managed to kill the Archdemon _without_ giving up her own life, the truth must be she was in the Golden City. Therefore, she was dead.

She must be, mustn't she?

The marvels at the commander's home had been nearly beyond her comprehension, and with a heavy sigh, she again struggled to quell the anxiety that churned in her belly. Shepard and his companions had been elusive and the commander had seemed as unsure of her arrival as she, though she'd adamantly fought against her own unease.

"There's nowhere else I can be," she whispered to herself, swallowing hard as she fought back the tingling of panic in her spine. "Nowhere else."

Travelling to his astonishing ship had nearly overwhelmed her, but she'd harnessed her nervousness, turning its energy into focus, and had not revealed to the commander and his companions that she was afraid. With a small smile, she thought of her father, knowing he'd have been pleased with her self-discipline.

She wondered what he would tell her now that it was beginning to slip.

She played with her plait, finally undoing it and running her fingers through the tangles as she paced the room. Her eyes darted around, the dozens of objects that were mysteries to her seeming to jump out at her. Everything here was so strange, so foreign to her and she wondered what else it could be that Shepard would show her, as he'd promised to do.

Closing her eyes, she drew a steadying breath.

Commander Shepard had saved her life, not once, but twice. That he claimed not to be a spirit or to know how she came to be here rattled her to her core, battering the confidence she held in where she was.

The Chant of Light stated that the Golden City had been built by the Maker for the souls of his mortal children to reside in after their living bodies had perished. It had been desecrated by the Magisters, who'd defiled it not only with their presence, but with their arrogance as well, its streets turning black when they'd entered. This had been the birth of the first darkspawn.

It was a fundamental lesson of the Chant, one used by the leaders of the Chantry, to remind its followers of the need for humility as well as submission. Had the Magisters not disobeyed the Maker, had they remained humble and grateful for their gift of magic, the Maker would not have abandoned His children and the Blights would never have been.

She remembered as a child, asking her tutor what the Golden City would have looked like, and they'd spent many lessons discussing the majesty of their creator. They'd searched the Chant for any kind of description, learning that it was a bright and beautiful place, but this had been lost, the Black City taking its place long ago.

A shiver of fear shook her frame.

Nothing in the Chant spoke of a second city, nothing in any of its teachings told of another place prepared for those faithful to the Maker. The only hope offered to His followers was that if they were faithful enough they would return to His side. Here she stood, untold wonders surrounding her, and she could not escape the knowledge that the Chantry taught: that the Golden City no longer existed.

So where _was_ she?

She shook her head, trying in vain to scatter the fearsome thoughts swamping her certainty. "No," she hissed, shaking her head again. "No. There can be no other answer. I _am_ in the Golden City."

Drawing several slow breaths, she closed her eyes and struggled to quell her panic. But just as she was beginning to master herself once more, the hum of the ship changed again, and her heart leapt inside her chest. With a strangled, choking gulp, she finally uttered the truth she could no longer avoid.

"How can I be here if the City is no more?"

Opening her eyes, she studied the glow of the door panel, and with a mask of determination, moved toward it. Gathering what was left of her courage, she left the room.

**xXx**

James and Steve were stepping off of the elevator just as Abby walked past, the _swoosh_ of the doors startling her. As they recognized her, she stopped, meeting their looks of surprise with a wild one of her own.

"Where am I? What do you call this place?" she demanded, her eyes alight with fear.

"Abby?" Steve exclaimed, his eyes widened with shock. "What's going on? Why did you leave your room?"

As James approached her, she backed away. "Abby, it's okay, you're safe! What happened?"

"Is this the Maker's home?" she yelled, her face contorted with a myriad of emotions.

"You're on the Normandy, Abby, you know that," Steve replied calmly as he neared her.

"That's _not_ what I asked you," she rasped. "Is this the Maker's home?"

James met Steve's glance and arched an eyebrow.

"It's not a difficult question! A simple yes or no will do!" she snapped. She waited but neither man spoke further. "That's a no, then, isn't it? He's not here," she concluded, backing away from them.

Suddenly, she darted past them and onto the elevator, slapping the glowing console at its interior.

"EDI!" James bellowed, moving slowly toward Abby, who had trapped herself inside the small room.

"The elevator is disabled, Lieutenant," replied the AI.

"Who was that?" Abby demanded, looking around her. "That was a woman!"

"Abby, please, I know all this seems like a lot, but you can trust us," Steve said quickly.

The scared woman's vivid blue eyes were clouded with tears. "No, _none_ of this is what I thought it was," she rambled in a frantic tone. "Who was that speaking?"

Steve offered a gentle smile. "Everything is fine, Abby, there's nothing to be worried about. Why don't we – "

"No! Who spoke to me?"

"It was EDI," James replied softly. He stepped into the elevator with her, but made sure not to block the exit with his large frame. "She's a computer, an artificial intelligence that's part of the ship."

"Correction, Lieutenant," EDI's calm voice said, and Abby's eyes darted around them, still not seeing a source for the female voice. "I _am_ the Normandy."

"Where are you?" Abby asked softly, blinking rapidly. "Why can't I see you?"

"The easiest explanation, Lady Cousland, is that I am the ship. Simply put, I am everywhere, though should you wish to speak with my physical form, you may do so at the helm. It is a pleasure to have you aboard. May I call you Abby?"

Abby's chin trembled. "In my world, if I encountered a voice, one whose owner I could not find, I would think it a demon."

"Demon?" EDI asked. "My understanding is that a demon is an evil spirit, devil or fiend. I am none of those things, Lady Cousland. My purpose is to protect the Normandy and her crew, and while this may sometimes entail deploying certain measures of calculated aggression, I do not believe this qualifies me as 'evil'."

"EDI?" James began quietly, seeing Abby's rising panic at their continued interaction, "maybe you could explain more to Abby another time, and, you know, _in person_."

"Yes, that may prove more effective," replied the AI. "I am available should any of you need my assistance."

James nodded, his eyes locked with Abby's. "Thanks, EDI, I think we're okay," he said. Abby's chin continued to quiver as he slowly reached his hand out to her. "Abby, I know this whole place has to seem crazy and I wish I could tell you how got here, but I can't. I swear, nobody here is gonna hurt you."

She shook her head, her blonde hair a wild cloud around her as her gaze locked onto James's extended hand. "Where am I? Where is here?"

"Abby, as much as we'd like to, we _can't_ explain things," Steve said gently. "Commander Shepard will come back and you and he can talk. I promise–"

"_Where am I_?" she demanded, cutting him off. "How is it that you _can't_ answer that question? Why will you not tell me?"

"There's a lot about our ship that you won't understand," Steve explained. "It's not that we won't tell you, it's that we're trying to make sure you're ready when we do."

"For what? Why would you need to ready me for anything? It's not a complex question, ser, and doesn't warrant a complex answer! I will _not_ ask you again; tell me where you've taken me!"

"We're orbiting over Tuchanka, the home world of the Krogan," James blurted out. "The commander is on a mission with their leaders."

"James, we're _not_ at liberty to explain things," Steve said pointedly. "The commander–"

"Isn't here," James replied tightly, his eyes not leaving Abby. "And she's scared."

"Lieutenant Vega, the commander and I had a _very_ specific conversation."

"Orbiting?" Abby repeated slowly, the fear in her eyes still obvious. "Stars orbit, moons orbit... but not ships."

"This one does," James said matter-of-factly.

She scoffed, shaking her head, causing a tear to slip down her cheek. "No, no they _can't_. One cannot orbit when one is in the sea."

"James," Steve said in a low tone. "_Don't_."

Abby looked slowly at Steve and then back at James.

"Abby, I'll tell you," Vega whispered sincerely, extending his hand to her again. "I can't answer all of your questions because I don't know how, but I _can_ show you where you are."

"James, this is a mistake," Steve argued. "It'll be too much for her."

She blinked, her gaze quickly darting to Steve and then locking onto James's hand. Slowly she took it and he held it, leading her off of the elevator toward the lounge, leaving Steve shaking his head.

"Damn," the pilot muttered under his breath, quickly moving to follow them.

**xXx**

They entered the lounge together, Steve and James flanking Abby who still clung to James's hand. Steve, having a good idea what James intended to show her, moved to the far side of the massive window, his arms crossed as he watched James reach the shutter control panel on the opposite side.

"Abby, behind this panel is a window," Steve began, "and what you're going to see outside of it is Tuchanka."

Tentatively, she released James's hand and moved to the center of the space, her eyes on the shutters. "All right," she said softly. "I'm ready."

James triggered the release and the shutters began to retract, slowly revealing a star-filled sky. She stepped forward, gazing up at the vibrant colors as they were exposed.

"Maker, it's beautiful," she whispered, moving to the glass, her palms pressing against it as she looked up.

The shutters completed their opening sequence and James arrived at her side, Steve joining them.

She smiled softly, her eyes aglow with the display around her. "How is it your sky is so vast? I've never seen – "suddenly she gasped, scrambling away from the window, grabbing James as she did. "There's nothing beneath us!"

Steve moved to the window as James kept Abby from running from the view. "What James told you in the elevator was true," he explained, gesturing behind him. "That orb below us is a planet called Tuchanka. It's the home world of an alien race known as the Krogan. We're in orbit above it. Our ship doesn't travel on water, Abby, it flies above worlds."

"Planet?" she whispered, her voice trembling.

"A celestial body, like a moon, only much bigger," Steve explained. "Some are uninhabited, while others have people living on them. The planet below us is where Commander Shepard is right now."

She gaped but took a hesitant step closer to Steve.

James, firmly at her side, elaborated. "People used to travel from one city and country to the next on water, but then, humans created machines that allowed them to travel in the air. Eventually, our people learned how to go beyond the blue skies and farther."

"Is this ship like a bird? Is it a creature? Is that how EDI was able to speak? The ship is alive?"

Steve shook his head. "No, it's not, and while it does have wings, they don't move like a bird's would," he replied. "What do the ships in Ferelden use to move them? What creates their momentum?"

"Sails of fabric," she answered softly. "The wind fills them and the vessel moves with it. If one were to travel the rivers, though, paddles are sometimes used instead."

"Our sails are called engines," James explained. "They produce our momentum, propelling us, and our helmsman, Joker – you remember him? – controls our direction and speed."

"With rudders?"

"No, not quite," Steve replied, "but there are panels that can be adjusted to aid in things like landing, or docking."

She nodded slowly. "What if we fall?"

"We won't," James assured her. "Where we are, above the clouds, is called outer space, and up here, it's different. There's no air, no wind, and nothing to pull us down. If our engines failed, we'd float, not fall."

Steve studied her for a few quiet breaths. "How are you feeling?"

Forcing a smile, she returned to the window and looked down. "I don't know," she confessed, her eyes moving from star to star. "I... A little over a year ago, I'd never left my parents' side, reared close to home, my life's path clearly before me. I learned a hard lesson when they died, I'd never known what a very ignorant girl I was. I had no idea of the way of the world or of the things in it. I only knew the perfect cocoon my family had kept me in. I _hate_ that feeling, realizing you know nothing."

She turned around and met their gazes evenly.

"The Chant of Light says the Maker created our world, He created us," she explained quietly. "I've spent my entire life being believing He is the center of everything and everyone," she continued as she turned and looked out again. "The last year I lived on Thedas was one filled with murder, abuse, lies and slaughter on a scale I cannot describe. The vile things I've seen and had to do... I believed He would save us and that somehow, some way, _we_ would manage to save _them_... I thought I'd begun to learn." Her words trailed off and she sighed. "Seeing all this, I wonder how I ever thought I was no longer that stupid little girl."

"You're not stupid, Abby," James gently argued. "We're just different, is all. I can't tell you a thing about your home, but I can listen, I can ask you to tell me about it. What we're doing right now is the same thing."

She glanced over her shoulder at him. "What you're doing is humoring a scared fool. I'm sorry," she whispered, shaking her head. "How could I have _ever_ thought this was the Golden City?"

Steve moved to her side and offered a gentle smile. "Look, you're no fool and there's a reason you're here, a good one, we just have to figure it all out. And as far as what you thought all this was, while I can't say I'm familiar with your Maker, I _am_ familiar with the need to hold onto what feels safe. I'd say that's instinct."

"Considering it all, I'd say you could teach us all a thing or two about keeping it together," James added. "I can't imagine waking up from some huge battle and having everything you've ever known flipped upside-down. Don't be so hard on yourself."

She nodded. "You're both kind. Thank you, I think I'm feeling much better."

Steve's omni-tool chimed softly and he checked it. "I'm sorry, Abby, I've got a few things I really should take care of so that I'm ready to retrieve the commander and his team. Would it be all right if I came to see you in the morning?"

"Of course, you must see to your charges," she immediately agreed, quickly adopting a more formal tone. "I'm grateful, Lieutenant Cortez. I appreciate your help very much."

"Please, call me Steve," the pilot replied. "I'll be back in the morning and we'll talk some more then, okay?" He moved toward the exit and met James's eyes. "James, I'll catch you back down in the hangar."

"You will indeed, my friend," James said before turning to face Abby. The lounge doors opened and closed and he smiled kindly. "You, uh, you gonna be okay?"

She drew a shaky breath but returned his smile. "I expect I'll be walking about in a constant state of amazement, mingled with a bit of panic now and again, but yes, I'll be all right. I barely reacted when Steve's arm began to glow, so, progress already."

"His arm? Oh," he chuckled. "His omni-tool. Yeah, I guess that would look a little weird. You'll be seeing a lot of those, almost everyone uses them. They're how we communicate with each other if we're not together, how we purchase supplies, that sort of thing."

"I expect that is a helpful thing," she replied and then sighed. "I'm sorry, James, I was in such a state. I'm normally made of stronger stuff, I assure you."

"I believe it," he replied, something warm in his voice. "You _did_ kill a dragon, after all."

She chuckled. "I suppose I did," she agreed, her smile fading as a thoughtful look came over her. "What was it that other gentleman said earlier, at the commander's home? 'Puff' something?"

James ran his hand through his hair, embarrassed that she'd heard Joker's snide comment. "Uh, that's just Joker, he's kind of a smart-mouth. Puff was a dragon in kids' stories a long time ago. A nice one."

"Oh."

"I'm guessing your dragon wasn't too nice?"

She shook her head. "No, actually, it wasn't. It was rather unfriendly and most eager to squash me under one of its feet, not that I let it."

James arched an eyebrow. "Just how big was this thing?"

She shrugged. "Nearly twenty meters from snout to tail, and its wingspan was nearly double that. The size wasn't the real problem, though; it was the fire it tended to blow on us all that was tricky."

With a shake of his head, he blinked. "You're pulling my leg."

"No, not in the least."

"You're amazing, you know that? You killed something that size? With a sword?"

She grinned again. "Not too amazing. I did die, after all. Or something like it, anyway," she reminded him. "Besides, I wasn't alone and that makes everything easier."

"Well, you're not alone now, either. Maybe that will make all this easier, too."

Silently she nodded, her gaze returning to the planet below.

"It's late, I should let you get some sleep," he began, touching a fingertip to her forearm for a moment. "Think you're ready? Can you sleep?"

"I believe so."

"Good," he whispered and moved to the shutter controls.

"Wait, please, leave it open," she requested. "I know I'm safe. I'd like to see all that I can."

"Okay. But if you need anything, just use that communicator the commander gave you. I can be up here in no time."

"Thank you."

He rocked on his heels, his hands jammed into the pockets of his fatigues. "I guess I should go, you need your sleep." He returned to the exit and opened the door, lingering at the threshold, watching her quietly. "Good night, Abby."

She turned to him, the glow of the planet below casting a light around her, her blonde hair loose around her shoulders. "Good night, James. And thank you."


	4. Good Intentions

**Good Intentions**

The mission on Tuchanka had taken far longer than Shepard had anticipated. He, Garrus, Kaidan, Wrex, Baraka and Mordin had landed on the planet a day earlier, but three of them had not been on the shuttle ride back to the Normandy. Wrex had remained on the planet with Baraka while they made plans for the future of the krogan people, now that they had a future.

And Mordin… Mordin would never be coming back.

Shepard now stood outside the Port Observation Lounge. He'd finished his debriefing with Hackett and had sent a very strongly-worded reply to the Salarian Dalatrass's spiteful email. Steve had sent him a brief note saying he'd understand if Shepard wanted to be alone, but if he wanted to talk…

Shepard had not yet replied to that one.

He did need to talk to someone, needed to distract himself from his anger and hurt over Mordin's loss. Someone with whom he could pretend everything was all right, who could allow him to rely on his façade of control until he could begin to believe in it himself.

Steve would catch up with him eventually, and Shepard wouldn't deny his partner the chance to offer him solace, but if he was honest with himself, at this moment what he needed was someone who needed_ him_.

He needed to talk to Abby.

He drew a few slow breaths and reached for the entry sensor, waiting a beat until the door slid open. He blinked, not expecting to find Lieutenant Vega on the other side.

"James? What are _you_ doing here?"

James shifted his weight slightly and moved aside, allowing Shepard entrance. "Hey, Commander. How'd it go on Tuchanka? Esteban said–"

Shepard charged straight past him and into the lounge, his nostrils flaring, his fists clenched at his sides. "What the hell are the shutters doing up?" he demanded, spinning around and fixing James with an icy glare.

James clasped the back of his neck, a nervous laugh rushing out of him. "Uh, yeah… about that…"

Shepard folded his arms. "Well? I'm waiting_._ And where's Abby?"

"She's in the, you know, ladies room," James explained, lowering his voice. "As I was about to say, Esteban asked me to stay with her until you got back from–"

"I _asked _you a question, Lieutenant."

"Right. You did." James moved closer to the window, where Tuchanka could clearly be viewed below. "Thing is, Abby was struggling with some questions while you were gone, and we didn't know how long you'd be. It just seemed… I dunno, wrong not to answer them."

"We?" Shepard stepped forward, coming toe-to-toe with the younger marine. "Who's we?"

The panel on the door chirped, and James froze for a second, unsure whether or not to answer it. After a minute, he headed for the door, feeling Shepard's eyes boring into him. He pressed the panel and the door opened, allowing Lieutenant Cortez to enter.

The shuttle pilot immediately registered the anger in his lover's eyes, and held his hands up in appeasement. "Shepard…"

"You _knew _about this?"

"It's okay," Cortez began, slowly moving closer to Shepard.

"No, Steve, it is _not_ okay! We talked about this! I wanted her to have just one night, one night before her whole world was turned upside down! Damn it, we _talked_ about this!" He placed his hands on his head and started to pace the lounge.

Steve, who knew what had happened on Tuchanka, realised the true source of Shepard's chagrin and kept his voice steady when he answered. "James was right, sir, and I agreed. It was the right thing to do," he said softly.

"Wait, no," James interrupted, his hand slicing through the air. "You don't need to defend me." He turned to Shepard. "Don't blame Esteban, sir. He tried to warn me off but she was scared, and starting to panic. She needed us to explain something, anything, and I couldn't let her be afraid like that. I hadto do _something_. I'm sorry, but telling her was inevitable, Commander. She's fine, now, and with all due respect, I don't know why you're so upset."

"Upset?" Shepard stalked towards James and jabbed him on the chest with his finger. "I'll tell you why I'm upset! I trusted you two to take care of her while I was gone, to ease her in, and I come back to find you've told her… what exactly _have _you told her? That we're being harvested by gigantic, fifty million-year old machines? And you think she was scared before?"

"No, sir! We didn't say anything about the Reapers, but did you really expect us to keep _lying _to her?" James retorted, backing off a step. "She thought we were on the sea, that you were captain of a friggin' boat or somethin'! Are you telling me we should have let her keep freakin' out?"

"Watch your tone, Lieutenant," Shepard warned, and James sighed, waving a hand in resignation.

"Adam, please," Steve broke in, coming up behind Shepard.

"Back off, Steve," Shepard replied, his voice deceptively calm. "This is not–"

A throat was quietly cleared from the far end of the room and all three men turned to face Abby, who was standing quietly, her hands clasped together.

"Ah, Abby, you're back," James began, and Shepard turned his back on all of them, hands on hips as he fought to regain his composure.

"Hey," Steve whispered to Shepard, laying a hand on his arm.

"You could have told me about this on the way here," Shepard hissed through gritted teeth. "I should have been prepared."

Steve gave an apologetic shrug, his eyes downcast. "It didn't seem like the right time, after... When _would _have beenthe right time?"

"Any time would have been better than _now_, and maybe then I wouldn't have come in here _yelling."_

"Commander," Abby said in a crisp, clear voice. "You're kind to have wanted to protect me, but I am not made of china."

Shepard slowly turned around, finding that Abby had stepped closer and had heard his and Cortez's conversation.

"She sure as hell isn't," added James with what sounded like pride, or admiration, in his voice.

"Right," Shepard mumbled, momentarily disarmed.

"Perhaps I misunderstand the situation," Abby began, "but you placed me in the care of these capable gentlemen while you were away. For the past day and night, your men have helped me a great deal. I'm afraid I lost my composure and allowed panic to get the better of me. I truly left them with no choice but to show me… this…" She moved to the window and placed a hand against the glass, sharing a smile with James.

"I pressed your men, Commander, and forced their hands. I was beginning to form my own answers to my relentless questions, answers which, clearly, were wrong. Your lieutenants saved me from my imagination and I'm grateful for their help. I may be speaking out of turn, but I do not believe they merit your censure."

All eyes turned to Shepard and he watched Abby carefully, finding no hostility in her demeanour, only grace and steady dignity. He slowly nodded before releasing a quiet sigh, and Steve stepped closer to him, again laying a hand on Shepard's arm.

"James and I have gotten to know Abby a little better while you were gone. She's a strong woman. We wouldn't have gone ahead if we didn't think she could handle it."

"Yeah," James echoed, "but… sorry. Y'know, for going over your head. And for the record, Esteban told me you wouldn't be happy about it."

Steve shook his head. "I did, but… it _was_ the right time. The right call. It wasn't about us disregarding your wishes, Adam, it just seemed natural."

Shepard watched both men for a moment before his shoulders and jaw relaxed slightly. "All right," he said quietly. "I always encourage those under my command to think on their feet, and it seems that it worked out okay on this occasion. Abby, I'd like to apologise for my outburst."

A small smile curved Abby's mouth. "There is no need. I know how it feels to carry the hopes, the expectations, of so many. You are a warrior, a champion of your people. Such status carries its own rewards, but is also a terrible burden… one I'm familiar with. I understand, Commander."

Their eyes met, and Shepard tentatively matched Abby's smile.

"Why don't we…?" James looked at Steve and nodded toward the door.

Steve watched Shepard for a minute before nodding. "Okay," he agreed before leaning closer to Shepard, "but you need to rest."

"I will," Shepard assured the pilot. "I think I'd like to get to know Abby a little first, though. She seems like an interesting person. Besides, I can't have you two getting the jump on me."

"Let's go," said James, heading for the door.

"I'm going to run a diagnostic on the Kodiak, and then you're getting some rest," Steve insisted, pointing at the commander. "Couple of hours. Don't make me come looking for you."

"Promise," Shepard replied with a soft look at Steve, who nodded and joined James at the door. "Hey, guys… thanks."

"No problemo," James replied as the doors opened. Before departing, he looked at Abby. "I can come back later, if you'd like. Maybe I could show you my work station? I think you'd get a kick out of the omni-bow I told you about."

"I'd like that very much. Thank you," she replied, smiling still.

James grinned and nodded once, turning to leave with Steve.

Shepard's eyes lingered on the door for a short time before he turned and faced Abby. "So… how you holding up?" he asked her, his weariness apparent in his voice.

She shrugged. "I'm well, truly. I've been learning a great deal."

"I know we don't know a lot about each other yet, but I take the responsibility of my crew very seriously, and it was with that in mind that I ordered the shutters closed," he explained. "I wasn't trying to hide information from you, Abby, I just wanted to ease you into things. I can imagine this is a lot to take in."

"I understand, Commander, and please, don't apologize. I know what it is to be accountable for others and I do appreciate your concern. I'd likely have done the same." She watched as he rubbed the back of his neck and sensed that he was still tense. "Commander, is your mission on Tuchanka complete?"

"It is."

"And was it successful?"

His lips drew into a firm line and he nodded once. "It was," he replied succinctly, "but not without cost."

"I'm sorry."

"Thank you. So," he continued slowly and she recognized he needed to speak of other things. "What did they show you while I was away?"

"Well, I've learned we're in outer space, an idea quite new to me, and that we're floating in a ship that's not sailing but flying. I now know there are many planets and many different people calling them home. I also spoke with EDI."

He blinked slowly. "I'd imagine that was, uh, rather unique."

She smiled. "To say the least," she agreed. "I meant it when I told you I lost my composure, Commander. I left this room and tried to use the, ah – Maker, what's it called? – oh yes, the elevator. EDI stopped me, or rather, she stopped it from working."

"Sounds like I missed quite a lot."

"Basically I behaved poorly, embarrassed myself a good deal, and your crewmen saved the day."

"Those two have a knack for that," he replied with a soft smile. "Well, I'm glad you're feeling better, and I'm glad Steve and James were here to help."

"As am I. Steve was very thoughtful, as was James. He's a good man."

"Steve or James?"

She averted her eyes for a moment. "Both. I meant both, of course."

With a nod, Shepard gestured to the couch and they both sat.

"I'm not always going to be available, so I'd like you to familiarise yourself with the crew. You also don't need to remain in this room at all times. You're not a prisoner. The reason I wanted you to stay here initially was because I didn't want you exposed to everything all at once. However, you seem to have taken what you've seen so far in your stride."

"Eventually, yes," she replied slowly with a smile.

"I've been trying to imagine how you must have felt when the guys opened the shutters. I think you're dealing with it really well, but I don't want any more shocks like that for you. I'm going to tell you a few things now, Abby, to prepare you for some of what you're going to see."

She sat up straight and nodded. "I'm ready."

"Okay. You're already aware that the Normandy is a ship that travels through space, and that we're at war. I know you're no stranger to battle yourself, but I want to reassure you that the Normandy is a very safe place to be. For the moment, the Normandy is not in direct conflict with our enemies. Rather, we transport people to war zones on planets, where the fight is."

"Like the planet you have just returned from," she stated.

"That's right. I also need to explain that the Normandy and its crew are part of an organisation called the Systems Alliance, which is based on my home planet, Earth. The Alliance is a human organisation. The race we're at war with is not human."

Again, she nodded, her expression thoughtful.

"However," he continued, "we're not at war with them _because_ they're not human. The Alliance has peaceful relations with several other non-human races and organisations. Some members of those races are aboard the Normandy, and are our allies." He watched her for a moment, wondering whether she would react negatively to that. He still knew very little about her background and had no idea whether she'd ever met a non-human life form.

She did not react negatively however, but smiled. "During the Blight, I encountered several people who were not human, and from an early age I was acquainted with the elves who worked at my family home."

"Elves?"

"Yes, they were employed as servants. As a child, I played with some of the staff's children. I have also encountered dwarves, wolf people, golems, abominations, and the darkspawn, who are corrupted humans, elves or dwarves."

"Not to mention, dragons," he commented as he sat back, appearing pensive. "Well. Maybe this won't be as difficult as I'd thought. I was a little concerned about you meeting the other species we have on board."

She dipped her head. "I cannot promise not to be surprised when we meet, particularly if those species are very different in appearance from us. However, I shall not scream and take to my bed," she said with a glint in her eye. "That would be discourteous, if nothing else."

He grinned, liking Abby more by the minute. "It sounds like you're ready, then. I have one particular person I'd like you to meet first. She's not that different from humans in terms of appearance. Except that she's, uh, blue, and has tentacles for hair. Otherwise, she looks just like you or me."

"Oh, is that all?" she joked, and Shepard laughed.

"That's all. Her name's Liara. She belongs to a race known as the Asari, who are a very peaceful, wise people. She's a good friend of mine and I think you two would get along and have a lot to talk about."

"I would very much like to meet her," she said enthusiastically.

"All right." Shepard looked up slightly. "EDI, I'd like to assign a security clearance to Abby."

"Proceed."

Shepard activated his omni-tool and entered a code. "Level five, with a slight alteration. Access to the shuttle bay only when Lieutenants Cortez or Vega are present."

"Should Lady Cousland have free access to your cabin, like Lieutenant Cortez?" asked the AI.

"No, EDI. Entry upon permission only, like the rest of the crew."

"Understood. Complete. Lady Cousland, you now have access to the Crew Deck, with the exception of private quarters, Life Support and the AI Core. Access to the shuttle bay when Lieutenants Cortez or Vega are present. Access to the Captain's Cabin."

"The Crew Deck?" Abby asked.

"We're on the Crew Deck now," answered Shepard. "This is where you'll find the crew when they're off-duty. There's also the med bay, Starboard Observation Lounge, the Mess–"

"There's a mess? A ship this astonishing must surely have someone who would clean for the crew?"

"No," he laughed. "It's called the Mess, but it's actually where we all eat."

"Oh!" she answered, looking confused, and Shepard gave her a kind smile.

"I know it's a lot to take in, but the Crew Deck isn't as huge as it sounds. The Normandy is a frigate and has a crew of 164 people. Between half and two-thirds of the crew are on duty at any given time, except at night, when a night shift operates. Sometimes the Mess and Crew Deck are virtually deserted, and at other times they're quite busy. Right now, there's a steady flow of people coming and going but there won't be a huge crowd in the Mess."

"I see," she replied thoughtfully. "So I can visit the Mess whenever I like?"

"You can," he confirmed, "but at first I'd like someone to accompany you so you don't get overwhelmed. There are also certain parts of the ship you don't have access to."

She held up a hand. "I understand completely, Commander. My only concern is, until I become accustomed to the ship's layout, that I might enter a restricted area without realising."

He shook his head. "That can't happen. Everyone on board the Normandy is assigned a security clearance. EDI is aware of each of them, and if you were to attempt to enter a restricted area, EDI would inform you and guide you to an alternative destination."

"I would also be pleased to recommend areas of interest aboard the ship which fall within the bounds of your security clearance," EDI stated.

Abby looked up, as Shepard had before. "Thank you," she said politely before looking back at Shepard.

"Only five crew members have the highest security clearance," he explained. "Me, Dr. Chakwas, Major Alenko, Chief Engineer Adams, and EDI, of course. We assign security clearances for security reasons, obviously, but also for people's safety. For example, I might have unlimited access to all areas of the ship, but I wouldn't go anywhere near the ship's engines, and the chief wouldn't allow me to, anyway."

"He wouldn't _allow _you?" she asked in surprise.

Shepard nodded. "I'm the commanding officer of the Normandy, but Adams is in charge of Engineering, the doc is in charge of the med bay, and Joker flies the ship. I can direct them but I wouldn't dream of interfering with their duties and areas of expertise. I have complete confidence in my crew."

"Then I am not surprised that the Normandy is such a marvel," she commented, sitting slightly forward and glancing at the door. Shepard noticed this and looked in the same direction before smiling at her.

"Excited?" he asked, and she chuckled.

"I cannot deny a certain sense of… anticipation," she confessed.

"Well, would you like to accompany me to the Mess?" he offered, standing up. "How long has it been since you last ate?"

She also rose. "I'm not particularly hungry, but I would be glad to accompany you, Commander."

"One more thing," he said. "You're not under my command, so you don't need to keep calling me 'commander'. My name's Adam, or some just call me Shepard. Whichever you feel comfortable with."

"Well, if it wouldn't be inappropriate, I think I would prefer 'Adam'."

"It wouldn't be inappropriate at all. You were the one who insisted I call you Abby, after all."

She glanced up at him, finding he was smiling. "Oh, yes. I'd quite forgotten about that."

He gestured toward the door. "After you, Abby."

"Thank you, Adam," she replied, this time both of them smiling as they neared the exit.

The door slid open and Shepard gave an exaggerated groan when he saw that Lieutenant Cortez was standing outside.

"Hello, Abby," the pilot greeted before turning to Shepard, hands on hips. "Hello, Commander. I see you're still here. And _not_ resting."

Abby covered her mouth to stifle a giggle. "Hello, Steve."

"I was just going to take Abby to the Mess," explained the commander, but Cortez shook his head.

"Cabin. Now," he said sternly before winking at Abby. "I'll take her."

Shepard brought his forearm up to his chest. "I'll just let Liara know that you're coming to see her."

Before Shepard's omni-tool lit up, Steve thumbed behind himself. "I can do that. Elevator's _that_ way."

Shepard sighed and lowered his arm. "What was I just saying about my crew, Abby?"

"That you have complete confidence in them," she answered, feeling mischievous.

Shepard folded his arms. "Okay. This is a conspiracy. I know when I'm beat. I'll be back later to check on you," he said to Abby. "In fact, would you be willing to join me for breakfast? I was hoping we could talk about where you're from, but as I'm being sent to my room, I suppose it'll have to wait."

She laughed. "I will look forward to it. Good night."

"Yeah, _Goodnight,_ Commander," Steve added.

"Goodnight, _Lieutenant,"_ Shepard said to Cortez as he started to walk away. "Your insubordination has been noted. I'll come find you in the morning, Abby."

They waited until Shepard boarded the elevator before Steve hooked his arm. "Well, Abby, I hope I'll do as your escort."

"It would be my pleasure," she replied, tucking her hand into the crook of his elbow.

Steve smiled before activating his omni-tool. "Hello, Liara? It's Lieutenant Cortez. Are you free for a while? Shepard's guest would like to meet you."

"Oh, yes, of course!" said Liara through the device. "Would you like to meet somewhere, or shall I await you in my office?"

Steve considered that for a second, deciding that Abby might find the level of tech in Liara's office a bit too much. "We're on our way to the Mess. Why not join us there?"

"I'll be right there," Liara breathed, and Steve deactivated the omni-tool.

"Well, Abby, are you ready?"

"Please," she gushed, practically bouncing on her feet.

They took a leisurely stroll along the corridor and past the elevator, encountering a few crew members on the way, some of whom gave the couple a friendly nod, while one ensign saluted the lieutenant as he passed by. Abby returned their greetings with a bright smile and a 'good evening'."

Just as they were about to enter the Mess, Steve hesitated when he spotted Garrus striding towards them and glanced at Abby, wondering at her reaction.

"Hello, Lieutenant," said Garrus as he arrived in front of them. "Who's your friend?"

"Hey, Garrus," replied the pilot. "This is Abby, a guest of Commander Shepard."

Garrus's brow rose a little. "Oh? You're the lady they found on the Strip?"

She smiled graciously and nodded as she considered his physiology. He was like nothing she'd ever seen before, and yet, standing next to Steve and in such welcoming surroundings, she did not feel threatened in the least.

"Hey, I heard you brought a fascinating weapon aboard," Garrus went on excitedly, crossing his arms and leaning casually against a bulkhead. "You know, we should compare notes sometime. I'm an expert in long-range weapons myself. So's Shepard. Well, he _considers _himself an expert but, between you and me, he's little more than an enthusiastic amateur and… I'm… guessing… I'm the first turian you've ever seen," he finished, realising he was rambling.

"Yes, ser, you are," she said genuinely, offering a finely-trembling hand to him. "It's an honour to make your acquaintance."

Garrus gently clasped Abby's hand and shook it before releasing it. "Are you _sure_ you're a friend of Shepard's? Because you're way too polite."

"He's kidding," Steve said. "I think."

"Yeah, think what you want, Cortez," Garrus joked before straightening up. "Well, I won't keep you. It was, uh, nice to make _your_ acquaintance, Abby. I hope we'll get chance to talk another time. You'll often find me hanging around here. Come say hello."

"Yes, yes I will," she replied, her eyes following the turian as he walked away.

"You okay?" Steve asked quietly. "Abby? Uh, Abby?"

Her head snapped around and she started to laugh. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to stare at him."

"I doubt he noticed," Steve said with a grin. "So, you just met your first alien. How do you feel?"

"I feel… fine," she answered calmly before leaning in a little closer and lowering her voice. "This is all quite exciting. And that gentleman, Garrus? He was very pleasant."

"He's one of Shepard's closest friends," said Steve. "Adam'll be pleased to hear you met him. Well, are you ready to meet Liara? She's just over there." He pointed out a table in the corner where Liara was seated, near to her office.

"She's beautiful," Abby whispered to Steve.

"Oh, she's gonna like _you,"_ laughed the pilot. "Come on."


	5. Routine

The following morning, Shepard called on Abby as promised, and they walked together to the Mess, which was almost empty.

"Where is everyone?" she asked as they took a seat at a table.

"I have a morning routine. I go for a run around the lower decks, shower, and then have breakfast in here when most of the crew have gone. Not that I don't want to mix with them, but usually it's the only quiet time I get."

"And I expect you would retire at a much later hour than the rest of the crew," she guessed.

"That's right. Except for last night, that is. I slept for ten hours straight. That's kind of a rare luxury."

"What'll it be, Commander?" asked Mess Sergeant Gardener from behind the counter. "The usual?"

"Just a minute, Rupert," he replied before facing Abby. "What do you normally eat for breakfast? What did you have yesterday?"

"Oh, I didn't partake of breakfast yesterday, as I was not very hungry. As for what I normally eat, well, not so long ago it was whatever scraps were left from the previous evening. If we were lucky, it was reheated stew. If we were _really _lucky, we would breakfast at a tavern. I rather like bacon."

"Bacon, huh?" asked Shepard, looking over his shoulder. "The usual," he called out. "Twice. Oh, and some tea for my guest. Coffee for me."

"Tea?" spluttered Gardener. "Whad'ya think this is, Buckingham Palace?"

"Rupert," said Shepard sternly, "I'm sure you'll find some. _Quickly_."

"Yeah, yeah," answered the sergeant, muttering under his breath as he disappeared out back.

"I hope I'm not putting him to any trouble," Abby said anxiously, and Shepard shook his head.

"Not at all. He's a little cantankerous, but you'll get used to him. Maybe." He sat forward and clasped his hands together. "So, how was last night? I hear you met Garrus and had a long talk with Liara."

Abby's face lit up. "Yes, indeed. Liara was fascinated by my story. She's going to research the history of several planets to see if they match up with my own history."

"That's great, but I don't want you to get your hopes up."

"That's exactly what I told her, Shepard," Liara said, appearing behind the commander. "Abby is no fool and understands that the chances of finding anything of use are slim, but that will not stop me from trying. Oh… I hope I am not intruding on a private conversation," she added.

"Of course not," Shepard replied. "Join us."

"Oh, thank you." Liara pulled out another chair and sat down between them. "Good morning, Abby. Did you sleep well?"

"Considering I was so excited, I actually slept like a baby, thank you," she answered. "And how did you sleep, Liara?"

"Quite well, though I must confess that my mind was racing a mile a minute after we'd spoken. I practically leapt out of bed this morning… Shepard, why are you laughing?"

His face dropped and he sat up straight. "I wasn't _laughing. _I was smiling. There's a difference. I'm just not used to hearing such polite exchanges between two people."

"Well, you are going to have to get used to it," Liara chided before sharing a smile with Abby.

"I'd just like to say how grateful I am to you both," Abby began, and Shepard waved a hand in dismissal. "I'm also grateful that you let me 'borrow' Steve last night," she said to him. "I don't imagine you spend enough time together as it is."

He gave her a sideways glance, his mouth upturning slightly. "Figured that one out, did you?"

"It didn't take much figuring out," she said with a shrug. "Unless, of course, you allow all of your crew to order you to bed."

"I don't," he replied, his smile growing. "Anyway, speaking of your story, we haven't really had time to talk properly."

"I understand how busy you are, Com… Adam. Please do not trouble yourself."

"I actually have a couple of hours free this morning, so I thought we could finally have a real conversation. Maybe it'll help us figure out what you're doing here. If, of course, you don't mind repeating what you told Liara."

"Oh, no, I don't mind at all," she replied as Gardener approached their table, carrying a large tray.

"Waffles and bacon," he said, placing two plates in front of Shepard and Abby. "Waffles and bacon… here you go, ma'am. Coffee. Tea," he added, setting down two pots and cups. "Enjoy."

"Tea?" Liara asked brightly. "I was not aware there was any tea on board."

Gardener groaned. "I take it that means you want some, too?"

"That would be lovely, thank you."

Gardener sighed and walked away, while Abby studied her plate curiously. "Never had waffles before?" Shepard asked her.

She prodded one of the waffles with her fork and shook her head. "What are they?"

"Flour, a little salt, eggs, milk and butter, mixed together and fried. They go really well with bacon. In fact, it's illegal on nineteen planets to eat one without the other."

She watched him for a moment, finding nothing in his expression. "Is this the 'dry sense of humour' Steve warned me about?"

"Maybe," he shrugged before drizzling his meal with maple syrup. "Some wouldn't call it a sense of humour at all."

"Is… that also a legal requirement?" she asked, pointing to the syrup bottle, which he passed to her.

"Try it without, first," he advised, and she took a tentative bite, her expression brightening.

"I think you like waffles," he declared, and she nodded in agreement before looking behind Shepard.

"Oh, good morning, Garrus," she greeted.

"Hey, there," replied the turian, taking a seat opposite to Liara.

"Why don't you join us, Garrus?" Shepard asked with a smidgen of sarcasm, folding his arms.

"I… already did. So, everyone, what's shakin'?"

"Well, before we were interrupted, Abby was about to tell us about her life in Ferelden," Shepard replied, his brows raised.

"That wasn't very polite, was it?" Garrus drawled. "Whoever interrupted you, send them to me and I'll straighten them out." Ignoring the fact Shepard was shaking his head, Garrus turned to Abby. "Are you going to talk about your bow? I have to admit, after I'd spoken to you last night, I snuck down to the armory for a peek. You know, my people once used very similar weapons. I'd love the chance to–"

"Garrus, Abby isn't here to talk about her bow," Shepard interrupted.

"Tea," said Gardener, placing a pot and cup in front of Liara before glaring at Garrus. "Don't tell me _you _want some as well?"

"No, I don't drink tea," Garrus replied. "I'll have some dextro paste. The blue one, if you have it."

"Why don't I just go check?" Gardener muttered, his voice growing quieter as he walked away. "Why they build a counter in here, when no one uses it, beats the hell outta me."

"Okay," Shepard said. "I think we're getting a little off-topic here. I have a bit of spare time, and I want to find out more about Abby. I'm sorry for all the interruptions," he said to her.

"I don't mind, really," she answered.

"Is that bacon I can smell?" asked someone from the far end of the Mess, and Abby giggled, noticing the look on Shepard's face.

"Welcome to the party, Kaidan," groused the commander. "In fact, is _anyone_ actually on duty today?"

"Well, sure, I'm on duty because you're not," the major replied as he neared the table. "I've always got time to appreciate the smell of Canadian bacon, though. Hey, Gardener," he called out. "How about some bacon and eggs?"

"And how about I juggle pots and pans while I'm at it," Gardener muttered acerbically from the back. "Not like I got anything else to do."

"I heard that, Sergeant," Shepard called out. "If the job's getting too much for you, we can look into early retirement. As you spent most of your career with Cerberus, however, I don't imagine pension plans are high on their agenda."

"Be right with ya!" Gardener replied with false chirpiness, and Shepard rolled his eyes.

Kaidan grabbed a chair from a neighbouring table and squeezed in between Abby and Garrus. "Is that tea you have there?" he asked the ladies.

"I wouldn't," Garrus advised.

Kaidan gave the turian a puzzled look before shrugging. "Right. How are you settling in, Abby? It seems like you've made some new friends."

She smiled broadly at him and leaned forward, addressing the group. "I've been quite overcome by everyone's kindness. To be honest, when I realised I wasn't where I first believed, I was afraid, but despite not knowing why I'm here, I do know I'm surrounded by good people. I'm not scared and I have you all to thank for that."

"No problem," Shepard replied. "It's good to hear you feel more at ease."

"And you're a good person, too," Liara added.

"All right," Shepard said with a faint smile. "Now that half of the crew's here, why don't you tell us about Ferelden, Abby?"

For the next hour or so, Abby told her new friends about her childhood at Highever and a shortened history of the Grey Warden order. They listened in respectful silence, only speaking to commiserate her over the death of her parents, and when she told them something they didn't understand.

She was starting to recount her experiences during the Blight when Lieutenant Vega entered the Mess and did a double-take at them before approaching their table.

"Oh, hey. Morning, everyone. Morning, Abby."

"Lieutenant," said Shepard briskly.

"Good morning, James," Abby replied, straightening up a little.

"I, uh, just came up to grab a bite for me and Esteban," he explained. "We got an early start."

"I know that, James," said Shepard.

"Cool," replied the marine, who made no move toward the counter.

"Um, would you like to join us?" Abby invited after a slightly awkward pause. "I was just telling the others about the Blight."

"Uh, yeah, that'd be great, I mean, if that's okay with you, Commander?"

"Why not?" he said morosely, resting his head on his hand. "Just don't keep Steve waiting too long for his breakfast."

"Oh, I won't," promised James, and he borrowed a chair from a nearby table, sitting between Kaidan and Abby.

"Okay," Shepard resumed. "You were telling us about your crew."

Abby laughed. "I wouldn't exactly call them that. They were my friends. Well, mostly."

"Was there anyone… special?" asked James. "Like, you know, a boyfriend?"

"Isn't that a little personal?" Shepard rebuked.

"Hey, I didn't mean nothin'," James protested, his cheeks turning pink. "I just figured it'd be kinda sad if she had to leave someone behind, is all."

"It's quite all right," she answered. "No, there was no one like that."

"What about the rest of your companions?" asked Shepard.

"Well... I was quite close to Alistair. He and I were good friends."

"You mentioned him a few times. That's the guy who was the king's son?" Shepard asked, and James let out a whistle.

"Wow, you were best friends with a prince? Hell, that'd come in handy if you found yourself in a fix. You do somethin' wrong, he could just snap his fingers and it'd all be taken care of, no questions asked."

"James," Shepard interjected, meeting the lieutenant's eyes. "Why don't we let Abby tell us in her own words?"

Realising that was _not_ a request, James held his hands up. "Sorry, sir. Abby. Please. Go right ahead."

Abby smiled at James briefly before resuming. "He _was _King Maric's son, yes, but he wasn't raised as a prince. You see, he was Maric's bastard and was leery of assuming the throne. Eventually, though, he came round to the idea, believing he could actually do some good. It was decided that he _would_ rule, but he hadn't yet been crowned when... well, when we parted ways."

Shepard nodded, and Abby took that as her cue to continue. "I travelled with quite an eclectic group of people, but they all had their own merits, some of which took longer to become apparent than others."

"How so?" Kaidan prompted.

"Morrigan," she said with a fond smile. "She was a swamp witch, daughter of Flemeth, the Witch of the Wilds. She and I did not exactly hit it off immediately. Oh, and Alistair _loathed_ her. I often found myself stepping in to settle disputes between them. And, of course, there was Zevran. He tried to assassinate us, but we became firm friends."

From the corner of his eye, Shepard could see James's head darting back and forth between him and Abby, his eyes bulging, but he did not speak. Shepard firmly subjugated a smile and returned his attention to Abby.

"You would have liked Oghren," she said to James. "He also liked a drink."

"Huh?"

"Well, Steve told me that you and he sometimes drink well into the night."

"Nah, it ain't nothin' but a little snifter, you know?" James claimed, fidgeting in his chair.

"Not what I heard," Garrus teased.

"Hey, it's just to help us unwind at the end of a long day," James defended. "Nothin' wrong with that."

"Of course not," Abby answered calmly, her eyes briefly moving to Shepard, who covered his mouth with his hand, his eyes dancing. "Then there was Wynne. She was a mage, as was Morrigan."

"A mage?" Shepard asked. "What's that?"

"Oh, forgive me," she said, searching for the right words. "They were humans or elves who were born with the ability to command the elements. Not everyone treated mages as favourably as they deserved, partly because their powers were feared. Most of them resided in towers, away from the rest of society, and were guarded by an order of holy warriors called the Templars."

"What kind of powers did the mages have?" asked Liara.

"I don't claim to know how it worked, but Morrigan could shoot thunderbolts from her fingertips, and Wynne could surround us all in a protective blue light."

"Hey, Loco, Liara and the major can do the blue light thing!" gushed James before his words were cut dead by a withering glare from Shepard. "Oh, right, I wasn't s'posed to… shit. I-I mean… rats. Oh, crap," he stammered, springing out of his chair, his face so red it looked ready to combust.

"Maybe _now_ would be a good time to get that breakfast, Lieutenant," Shepard advised sternly, shaking his head.

"Yeah, yeah. That's exactly what I was thinkin'. Uh… sorry, Abby, for what I said."

"I have heard much worse than that," she replied kindly. "I have a brother. At least… I hope he still lives."

"Tell us about him," Shepard said softly, reminded of his conversation with Chakwas and Mordin, and that he would need to tell Abby about their findings soon. James quickly moved to the counter, though he continued to watch the others.

"I will," she said with a hesitant smile as she looked around the table, "but now I am curious. Are you all mages?"

"I'm not, if it helps," offered Garrus.

At that moment, Shepard's omni-tool glowed and he touched it. "Excuse me, Abby. Shepard here."

"It's Specialist Traynor, Commander. I'm sorry to bother you, but you're needed in the CIC."

"On my way," he replied before deactivating the device. "I'm sorry, Abby, but I need to take care of this."

"That's quite all right," she replied as he stood up. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"It's kind of you to offer, but I'll handle it. James," he called across the room. "I have to go. Stay here with Abby until I get back."

"Yes, sir."

"I'll be back as soon as I can," Shepard told Abby. "Just relax for a bit. I'm sure James will show you around."

"Please, do not hurry for my sake. Maker watch over you."

"Thanks," he replied before quickly exiting the Mess.

"All right," said Kaidan, also standing up, "let's break this up. Commander might need us in a bit."

Everyone at the table rose and Liara, Kaidan and Garrus said goodbye to Abby, promising to talk soon. She answered them politely, her eyes still on where the commander had left, when James arrived at her side.

"He'll be fine," he reassured her before activating his omni-tool. "Hey, Esteban? Shepard was just called to the CIC."

"Okay, I'll run a pre-flight check just in case. Thanks for the heads-up. Cortez out."

"Will the commander be going on another mission?" Abby asked James.

"I dunno for sure, but when he's called to the CIC, it's pretty likely he'll be going somewhere. I guess we'll find out soon enough. I'm slated to join him on his next two missions. We take it in turns so we all get a fair piece of the action."

"But does the commander go on _every_ mission?" she asked in dismay.

"Oh, yeah, that's just how he rolls. He wouldn't ask any of us to do somethin' he wouldn't do himself." Sensing her anxiety, he bumped his arm against hers. "Hey, the commander's an N7. They don't get any better than that."

"The number on his chest," she commented thoughtfully. "Is it a badge of honour?"

"Yeah, I guess it is. N7s are an elite group of marines who've received specialised training. There's nothin' they haven't seen or can't handle. As a matter of fact, I've been recommended for the N7 program myself," he said with a casual shrug.

She looked up at him. "That's quite impressive. You must be very proud of yourself."

"Ah, well, I, uh," he mumbled, tutting loudly when his omni-tool glowed.

"Garrus. James. Report to the hangar immediately. Steve–"

"Already on it, Commander."

"Good job, Lieutenant. James, bring Abby with you. Shepard out."

"Let's go," said James, his tone more sober as they started to walk toward the elevator. "Hey, you can see my work station."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" she offered.

"Well, the commander's allowed you to be in the shuttle bay, so it can't hurt. We'll see what we can find. I'm guessin' you're bored out of your brain sittin' in that lounge all day."

They reached the elevator, and James stepped aside to allow her to enter first. "Shuttle Bay," he said once they were inside.

"I'm not exactly bored," she explained, "but I'm not accustomed to standing idle when my friends are in need."

"So, uh, is that what you consider us? Your friends?" he asked softly.

"I hope so," she replied, twisting her fingers together. "You have all been so kind, and I very much enjoy your company."

"Ditto."

"D… um, I beg your pardon?"

"Oh, hell, I gotta stop doin' that!" he laughed. "Sorry. I meant, well, we feel the same way about you. All of us, I mean. The crew."

She smiled and looked at the floor, and the elevator seemed to take forever to reach the shuttle bay. When it did, James exited first. "Just to warn you, it's _huge _in here."

She stepped out and her eyes immediately went upwards, her mouth falling open. James stood at her side, waiting patiently until she'd collected herself.

"You are a master of understatement, James."

"Hah, yeah, I don't get called _that _every day. More like a master of bull… uh, the other way round. Hey, you wanna see my work station? I gotta get suited up."

"Oh? Are we attending a soirée?"

"A what?"

"A social gathering?"

"No, I gotta put my armor on," he clarified.

"Oh dear, how embarrassing," she murmured, her cheeks flushing.

"Hey, you got nothin' to be embarrassed about," he reassured her. "You can't be blamed for not understandin' when all I do is talk shi… uh… _nonsense_. Wow, that was a big word for me. Think I'll need to lie down when I get back."

She hung her head, her shoulders quaking with laughter, and James grinned. "It's real nice to see you laugh, Abby. You've been through a lot."

"You remind me of Alistair," she chuckled before sighing. "His sense of humour. He always knew just what to say when I was feeling low."

"You must really miss him," he guessed quietly.

"I miss all of them," she replied just as Lieutenant Cortez jogged past them.

"Hey, Abby! Welcome to the Shuttle Bay!" he greeted with a friendly wave. "Sorry I can't stop to chat, but I gotta get my bird ready. I'll catch you in you a bit, okay?"

"Yes, of course! Good morning!" she replied before Steve disappeared inside the Kodiak. She looked around the hangar, then, appearing confused.

"You okay?" asked James.

"Steve mentioned a bird, but I don't see one."

"Oh! No, he means that," he said, pointing to the blue shuttle craft.

"What is it?" she asked.

"That's the Kodiak. It's what we used to bring you here from the Citadel without showing you outer space," he explained. "Only we didn't bring you through the hangar, 'cos of the size of the place. Didn't wanna stress you out even more."

"Of course, I remember now." She took a few steps closer to the craft. "Does it have an engine, then, like the Normandy?"

"Yeah. In fact, it's kind of a mini Normandy. You can get about a dozen people in there, but normally it's less. Esteban's getting it ready to drop us somewhere."

"But why not go in the Normandy?" she questioned. "Wouldn't you be safer that way?"

James shook his head. "To put it simply, the Normandy's huge, and the Kodiak can get us into places unseen, if you know what I mean. So, for certain things, it's actually safer than the Normandy."

"Oh," she replied, nodding. "Does Joker fly the Kodiak as well?"

"No, ma'am," he laughed. "Not a chance. The Normandy's Joker's baby, and the Kodiak's Esteban's. I can fly it, too, but… kinda not while Esteban draws breath sort of thing, y'know?"

She smiled. "I take it he's quite possessive of his 'bird', then?"

"Hell, yeah. Even Shepard wouldn't get a look in. And Joker? Forget about it! Esteban's the best. Don't tell him I said that, though."

She nodded. "So, Est- I mean, Steve is in charge of the Kodiak. What are your duties, James?"

He straightened up, his chest puffing out. "I'm the Arms Master, in charge of weapons and armor for the entire crew."

"The entire crew of 164 people?" she gasped.

"Well, not _every_ single one. And Esteban helps out sometimes," he confessed, his tone hushed.

"I understand," she laughed, just as the bay door opened and Garrus entered.

"We just changed course," the turian informed James. "Looks like we're headed to Kypladon in the Silean Nebula."

"Kypladon?" James repeated with a frown as Garrus moved to his foot locker. "What's there?"

"I think I can hazard a guess where we're going," Steve called from inside the Kodiak. "Time to suit up, James."

"I'm on it," he answered before facing Abby. "Wanna give me a hand?"

"I'd be pleased to," she agreed, glad to be useful.

James led her to his foot locker, where he crouched down and removed several pieces of armor, laying them on the bench to his side. "Careful," he warned. "Some of those are pretty heavy." When he'd finished, he stood up, amazed to see that Abby had arranged the pieces in the correct order, and was holding out his foot plates.

"Alistair also wore heavy plate, and I would assist him to don it before battle," she explained. "Yours is not very different, except the material is much lighter."

He stared at her for a moment, his mouth agape, before he quickly shook his head and took the foot plates from her. "What was his armor made of?"

"His first mail was crafted from bone and leather, but later he acquired a suit of steel."

"Steel?" he exclaimed. "That musta weighed a freakin' ton!"

"Not quite, but almost," she said with a grin, reaching for his greaves.

James nodded before looking at one of his hands, examining his fingernails intently. "So… Alistair musta been pretty ripped, huh?"

"Ripped?"

"You know, muscular?"

"I suppose so," she said thoughtfully, "although I never saw him disrobed. He was quite broad across the back, though, and he dwarfed you in terms of height."

"Really? How tall was he?"

"About six inches taller than you," she replied, and James's shoulders sagged a little. "Although… he wasn't _quite _as broad across the back as you."

"Oh, okay," he mumbled nonchalantly, bouncing a little.

"James! Less of the chatter! Shepard'll be here soon," Cortez advised, poking his head out of the Kodiak's hatch as Garrus climbed aboard, a huge sniper rifle strapped to his back. "You wanna explain to him why you're not ready?"

"All right!" he shouted back before lowering his voice. "I better hurry." He took another piece of his armor from Abby and strapped it on. In less than two minutes, he was fully suited-up. "Thanks for the help," he said to her.

"You're welcome," she replied as they approached the Kodiak, where they waited outside. "Do you know why the commander wanted me here? Am I to accompany you?"

"I doubt that," he scoffed, startling when Garrus tapped his shoulder.

"You _might_ want to think about taking a weapon with you, Vega," the turian pointed out, nodding at the large arms cabinet on the far wall. "I'm good, but I wasn't aware Shepard wanted me to act as your bodyguard."

"Yeah, I was gettin' round to that," James muttered irately, his face blood red. "Come on, Abby. I'll show you my work station while we get a chance."

Just as James was selecting a firearm, the bay doors opened and Shepard strode in with Traynor at his side. "You ready, James?" asked the commander, heading straight for his foot locker, where he proceeded to unload his own armor.

"Yes, sir," answered the marine. "What'll you be taking?"

"Viper. Paladin," he ordered as he started to strap on his leg plates. "Abby, this is Specialist Traynor."

"It's great to meet you," said the specialist enthusiastically, reaching for Abby's hand, while James unlocked the arms cabinet, selecting the commander's weapons.

"Steve," Shepard called out, "we're in orbit over Cyone. You should have the co-ordinates for the fuel depot on the northern continent."

"Yes, sir, I have them. Course laid in."

Realising how short time was, Abby decided against offering to help Shepard with his armor and waited patiently until he'd finished issuing orders. James assisted Shepard with the final pieces of his armor and handed the commander his weapons before nodding at Abby and boarding the Kodiak with Garrus.

"Right," Shepard began. "Abby, Traynor is going to give you a proper tour of the Normandy, or at least the places you have access to. After that, I'd like you to visit Dr. Chakwas. She's working alongside Liara in the hope that they'll find some answers about why you're here. I'd like you to be on hand in case they have any questions. Is that okay?"

"Of course," answered Abby with a glance at Traynor. "Are you the commander's squire?" she asked the specialist, who gave a confused smile.

"No, she's…" Shepard paused, trying to find an adequate description of Traynor's duties. "She sees to all the little things that would wind up becoming very big things if they're not taken care of. We don't have that problem with Traynor, however," he complimented. "I guess she's the seneschal of the ship," he said, remembering Abby's mention of the steward of Highever.

Abby dipped her head in Traynor's direction. "Then you play a vital role in the Normandy's operation."

Shepard nodded. "That she does."

"Ready when you are, Commander," Cortez prompted.

"I have to go," said Shepard, moving toward the Kodiak. "We'll talk again when I return." He hopped aboard and slapped the side of the vessel twice before disappearing as the hatch closed.

"Be careful," Abby whispered.

"We should leave now, Abby," advised Traynor, "as Lieutenant Cortez needs to open the external bay doors."

Abby blinked and followed Traynor out of the hangar, venturing a quick glance over her shoulder before the doors closed.


	6. Playing the Hero

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**Med Bay**

Liara and Abby were seated at a console while Dr. Chakwas stood behind them, watching with interest as several images flashed up on the screen.

"What are you looking for?" asked the doctor.

"Abby and I have discussed Ferelden and her culture in great detail," Liara said over her shoulder. "This is a database of non-indigenous artefacts discovered on Council planets."

"Non-indigenous?"

"In other words, items which have no apparent use or function on the planets on which they were found, which may indicate that they were used by ancient civilizations. Abby has been most helpful in identifying some of the artifacts."

"Oh?" said Chakwas. "Does that mean they might be from her civilization?"

Liara shook her head. "Not necessarily, only that Abby is familiar with certain things, such as cooking implements or weapons, which would otherwise remain a mystery to us. I have learned a great deal from her."

"Stop," Abby directed, touching Liara's arm, and Liara paused the display on an image of a small orb, crafted from exquisite silver filigree.

"Do you recognize that?" Liara asked.

"Yes, it's a pomander."

"Would you spell that for me, please?" asked Liara, and Chakwas leaned forward for a better look as Abby provided the correct spelling for Liara's records.

"What was it used for?" the doctor asked, and Abby smiled up at the other woman.

"That's a very fancy one," she said with fondness in her voice. "My grandmother owned a very similar one. They were filled with fragrant herbs or dried flowers and carried about the person. They could be part of a lady's toilette, or used for medicinal purposes. For the relief of a head cold, for example, they were filled with camomile or eucalyptus."

"Fascinating," whispered Chakwas before grabbing a nearby chair and sitting next to the two women. "What else have you discovered?"

"Abby has identified several different items and weapons," said Liara. "I have compiled a new database containing those items that are familiar to her. It does not mean that they came from her civilization, but it greatly narrows down our search and provides an accurate frame of reference. It is encouraging that Abby recognizes any of these items, as it means that some, if not several civilizations similar to her own exist, or existed in antiquity."

"We'll get to the bottom of it, Abby," reassured Chakwas, patting the blonde woman's hand.

"Thank you for doing this," Abby said to both women.

"No, thank _you," _Liara countered. "Without your help, many of these items would have remained a mystery. I cannot tell you how excited I am by these new discoveries."

"You've made a friend for life there, Abby," the doctor laughed before standing up, her omni-tool glowing. She activated it. "Chakwas."

"Lieutenant Cortez here," said the shuttle pilot, his voice strained. "I'm about fifty klicks away from the Normandy and I got people needing medical attention."

"Details, Lieutenant," Chakwas asked soberly as the other two women looked up in concern.

"Shepard and Vega, ma'am. They inhaled radioactive gas at the depot. Sending you the analysis of a sample of the gas now. Shepard's doing okay and can walk, but James is in pretty bad shape. I've stabilized him but he's gonna need your help. Shepard busted a couple of ribs as well, but I fixed them."

"What about you and Garrus?"

"We're okay. I was in the Kodiak, and Garrus doesn't seem to be affected."

Her omni-tool pinged. "Analysis received, Lieutenant. I'll be ready for them. Chakwas out." She entered a quick command into her omni-tool. "Major Alenko, this is Dr. Chakwas. Shepard's party is on its way back, ETA three minutes. Lieutenant Vega is seriously incapacitated and Shepard was also injured. Please meet them in the shuttle bay."

"On my way," Kaidan immediately replied. "How bad, Doc?"

"Cortez informs me that Vega and Shepard have inhaled radioactive gas. It's treatable, but from the sound of it, Lieutenant Vega may be out of action for a few days at least. I won't know for certain until I've examined him."

"Got it. Okay, I'll let you get ready. Alenko out."

"Ladies, will you excuse me?" Chakwas requested, turning back to face Liara and Abby, who were already on their feet.

"Of course," Liara said, heading for the door, while Abby remained rooted to the spot.

"Abby, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave as well," said Chakwas before noticing the look of anguish on her face.

"What's wrong with them?" Abby asked the doctor. "Why is James seriously incapacitated? What did you say? Radio…?"

Chakwas stepped closer to Abby and laid a hand on her arm. "They were exposed to a toxic substance. James's exposure was greater than Shepard's, and he will therefore require more intensive treatment, but both of them will be fine after a few days' rest."

Abby's posture relaxed slightly, Chakwas's poise and confidence reassuring her. "Can I help in any way?" she asked.

"The best thing we can do is leave the doctor to do her job," Liara advised, arriving behind Abby. "She really is very good at what she does."

Abby nodded slowly. "Yes, yes, I understand. May I wait outside?" she asked, nodding toward the window.

"By all means," replied Chakwas, who'd already activated her omni-tool and was examining a screen full of information.

"Come on," Liara instructed, and Abby followed her out, the two ladies positioning themselves next the window.

After several minutes, raised voices were heard from the vicinity of the elevator. Shortly after, Shepard and Garrus strode through the Mess and into the med bay, keeping the doors open for the other three.

Kaidan and Cortez then emerged from around the corner, both of them supporting James, who appeared to be unconscious, his feet dragging behind him as his friends struggled to hold him up. Neither Shepard nor Vega were wearing helmets, and from her vantage point, Abby could see that Shepard was sweating profusely, while James's face was puce.

"Get him in! Quickly!" Shepard ordered hoarsely, and the doors slid closed as Abby and Liara looked on.

Inside, James was hauled onto a bed, Shepard clutching its side to steady himself, and Cortez grabbed his arm, steering him to the next bed, where he sat down.

"Thank you, gentlemen," said the doctor as she stood over James, her omni-tool working. "Garrus, I'll need you to remain here."

"No, we'll get out of your way, Doctor," said the turian. "I'm fine. Take care of those two first, and I'll be back later. I know you won't let me get away without an examination."

"Don't think I'll forget," she replied as the major and Garrus exited the med bay, joining Abby and Liara by the window.

"How did you end up inhaling the gas, Commander?" Chakwas asked, not taking her eyes off James. "I thought your suits have warning systems built into them?"

"Yeah, they do," Shepard said, surprising her with his angry tone, "but warning systems are only effective if they're _acknowledged._ James and I both got a warning that the scrubbers in our helmets were reaching saturation, but he ignored it because there were 'just a couple more marauders to take care of'."

"He _what?" _Steve exclaimed, rubbing Shepard's back when he broke into a coughing fit.

"I had to haul his ass out of there when we should have been helping Captain Riley and Garrus, who were nearly overwhelmed by Reaper troops," Shepard spluttered. "We were damn lucky."

"So that was what all the shouting over the comm. was about?" Steve asked, and Shepard nodded before coughing again, wincing as he clutched his ribs.

"Commander," Chakwas began, moving to Shepard's bed.

"No, take care of him," Shepard rasped, pointing at James. "I want him fit and healthy, because I want him to _feel_ it when I tear him a new asshole!"

"Take it easy," Steve gently urged.

"He jeopardized the entire mission with his recklessness," Shepard went on, his face reddening, and laid a hand on his chest, panting. "First he crashes the Kodiak, and now this?"

"Adam, _please," _Steve whispered and Shepard looked up at him, seeing the anxiety in the pilot's eyes. He shook his head but ended his tirade, knowing how much Steve worried about him.

"All right," he huffed, deciding to save his harsh words for another time.

With Dr. Chakwas's examination complete, she administered a remedy to James before moving to Shepard's side. "Hold still," she ordered, and Shepard felt a chill come over him as she treated him. "You'll need to rest up for a day or two," she advised him.

"What about James?" Cortez asked with a glance at the stricken marine. "Shouldn't he have come round by now?"

Silently, Chakwas moved to James's bed, concern marring her brow as she examined his read-out.

"James?" Shepard said, standing up and moving to the doctor's side. "Doc? What is it?"

She gave no answer and frowned at her screen as Steve joined them at the bedside. He looked up, catching Abby's eye through the window, and gave her a grim smile before turning his attention back to James.

"Come on," Shepard urged, firmly patting James's cheek with his hand. "James!" he said more loudly, his worry obvious.

"Hey, Loco," croaked James, his eyes opening a crack. "So you do care, after all."

Shepard gave an exasperated sigh and pushed away from the bed, turning away from James, while Steve folded his arms, shaking his head.

"Good to have you back, Lieutenant," Chakwas said.

"Thanks, Doc. It's good to be back."

"I'll be in my cabin," Shepard ground out as he headed for the door. "I have reports to write. Steve, stay here with James. I'll be down later to help out with the Kodiak."

"Commander, I want to see you again before the end of the day," said Chakwas. "And you are not cleared for combat for the next thirty-six hours at least."

"Right," Shepard mumbled as the door opened.

"That's an order, Commander. I'll re-evaluate your condition tomorrow evening."

He sighed and turned back slightly. "Yes, ma'am."

_You okay? _Cortez mouthed and Shepard gave him a nod before stepping out into the Mess, quickly finding himself surrounded.

"How's he doing?" Kaidan asked.

"Okay, but he'll be out of action for a bit," Shepard replied before noticing Abby. "He'll be fine," he assured her, his anger slowly dissipating. "Abby, I need to go and take care of a few things, but can we meet up later? I'll come find you when I'm ready."

"Are you all right?" she asked, and he nodded.

"I'm okay. Stay with Liara for now, and we'll talk later."

"I will," she agreed.

"Shepard, Abby and I have made some progress in our search," Liara informed him. "When you have recovered, and feel ready, I would like to share our findings with you."

"Tell you what," Shepard said to the two women, "why don't you join me for supper in my cabin. It'll be quieter there. Nineteen hundred hours."

"We'll be there," Liara replied.

"Garrus, Kaidan, with me," Shepard instructed, and the men followed him out of the Mess. "Garrus, I need you in the armory today. Steve'll be on his own for a couple of days, so get everything straightened up down there."

"Leave it to me," Garrus assured him.

"Kaidan, you okay to hold the fort for a while longer?"

"You bet, Commander. As long as you need."

"Thanks."

Abby watched them leave and released a quiet sigh. "I feel so useless, Liara," she confessed. "I wish there was something I could do to help. I'm not used to this, just standing around, watching from the sidelines. Adam seems to have the world on his shoulders."

"His job is not an easy one, but he is made of strong stuff, and has a fine crew who support and respect him. And you're helping more than you can imagine," the asari reassured her. "Let's go to my office. I think you're ready to see it. There, we can access much more information than we can anywhere else on the ship. And that way, we'll have something concrete to present to Shepard later. How does that sound?"

Abby glanced back at the window, and saw that Steve was assisting James out of his armor just as the window shutters started to close. "All right," she agreed. "Anything to keep my mind busy."

~o~O~o~

When the ladies arrived at Shepard's cabin, Abby was relieved to see that Adam was more relaxed than he'd been earlier that day, and that he'd been resting. He invited them to make themselves at home and to help themselves to drinks and the canapés he'd had sent up. After some questions about Shepard and James's health, Liara cut to the chase and started to show Shepard some of the images she and Abby had been studying.

"_That's_ a nice shield," he commented, admiring a particularly fine artefact. "It'd look great on my wall, don't you think, Abby?"

Liara folded her arms. "Shepard, that piece is the property of the War Museum on Ontarom. And, before you ask, I do not think the curator of the facility would be prepared to 'cut a deal' with you."

"But you could put a good word in for me, right, Doc?" Shepard asked earnestly with a quick sideways glance at Abby, who was by now starting to understand his sense of humor, so said nothing.

"Absolutely not!" protested the asari. "I have a reputation within the scientific community and… oh. You are joking, aren't you?"

"Had you going there, didn't I?"

Liara shook her head before noticing that Abby was doing her best not to laugh. "I see you share Shepard's love of deadpan delivery, Abby. One would think that after three years on a human ship, I would have learned by now."

"Too easy, T'Soni," Shepard teased with a nudge to Liara's arm, and she shook her head again, finally smiling.

"If you two have finished ganging up on the asari," she replied with wide eyes, "I would quite like to continue."

Shepard discreetly thumbed at Liara, batting his eyelashes in an exaggerated way, and Abby covered her mouth with her hand.

"I saw that, Shepard," Liara reprimanded.

"Uh-oh. Busted," Shepard grinned and Abby laughed, delighted to be a part of things. "Okay," he said. "Show me what you've found."

"Well, see for yourself," said Liara, instructing her omni-tool to show several images of different artefacts. "Abby has identified a number of items I had never even heard of, as well as many items of clothing, weapons, tools, cooking utensils and so on."

"You used all of those things?" he asked Abby.

"I used similar things," she clarified. "It is obvious to me that they do not originate from Ferelden, but it is encouraging that those items were in use on other planets."

"How do you know they weren't used in Ferelden?" Shepard asked.

"The design and make of them are not quite right. And as for the shields, for example, I do not recognize the devices upon any of them."

"Devices?"

Abby glanced at Liara, who brought up the image of the shield Shepard had admired. "This design, here," Abby said, pointing out an emblem of two crossed swords. "Each noble family, each order or military unit, had its own device which would be painted or engraved upon their shields to identify them. So far, I have not recognized any of the devices Liara has shown me."

Shepard leaned in closer to the screen and frowned, falling silent for a minute.

"What are you thinking, Shepard?" asked Liara.

"Can you draw, Abby?"

"Why, yes," she said with a smile. "I don't know if I'm any good, but I used to enjoy painting and line drawing."

Shepard matched her smile with his own. "Liara, I think it's about time Abby had an omni-tool."

"You… want me to wear one of those things?" exclaimed Abby in dismay. "But I wouldn't know where to start!"

"An excellent suggestion, Shepard," Liara chimed in. "Abby, I will show you how to use it. You do not need to learn _everything, _but you will be able to communicate with it."

"And draw," Shepard added, remembering the image he'd once created of his vision of Abby which, he now realised, he hadn't saved.

"Well… I suppose I could," Abby mumbled uncertainly, "if you're sure I would be able to use it."

"You will have no problem assimilating an omni-tool," Liara declared confidently.

Abby raised her right arm and examined it closely, her brow wrinkling, and Liara and Shepard exchanged a glance.

"I am sorry, Abby," said Liara. "This is all… normal to us. You don't _have _to use an omni-tool. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"I also apologize," Shepard added. "I didn't consider how unusual this must be for you."

"No, it's all right," Abby replied. "I know that you would not do anything to harm me. I was merely… surprised. I do not fully understand how the omni-tool works. It's such a strange object to me."

"Well, I'll tell you," Shepard offered. "Short version. The omni-tool can be activated and used by voice or touch alone. You've probably seen some of us pressing buttons on it or speaking directly into it." He glanced at Abby, who nodded. "It can also be activated by moving the hand in a certain way," he added, wiggling his fingers to demonstrate, "Although that takes practise and it's not entirely necessary anyway."

"Oh, I see," she mumbled with a slightly embarrassed laugh. "I had thought that they were magical."

"Ah," said Shepard. "Is this to do with the discussion we had in the Mess? When you thought we were… uh…?"

"Mages," Liara finished.

Abby sat forward, an excited gleam in her eyes as she looked back and forth between the other two. "And… are you?"

Shepard shook his head. "Not exactly, at least not in the way you think. We can't command the elements and there's nothing 'magical' about us. We do have certain powers, though. And I want to make it clear that there's nothing dangerous about them, unless they're used in a combat situation."

"What kind of powers?" asked Abby, barely able to contain her excitement. "What can you do?"

"Well, let me see." Shepard pointed to the far end of his cabin. "Watch that coffee cup on my desk."

He concentrated hard, a faint blue glow emanating from his hands, and Abby watched in amazement as the cup slowly rose a few feet into the air before returning to its original spot.

"Oh, well done, Adam!" she exclaimed.

Liara stood up and moved next to Shepard, shaking her head in pity. "The poor commander probably needs a lie-down after that. I will show you how it's _really_ done."

"Show-off," Shepard teased.

With little effort, Liara again levitated the cup, but this time she moved it through the air, across the cabin and towards Abby, who tentatively picked it out of the air. "That's incredible!" she said with a huge grin. "How do you do it? I have seen magic and spells but never before have I seen such finesse, such control of one's powers!"

"It is something certain people are born with," Liara explained, "like your mages. We are known as biotics. My people, the asari, are born with biotic capabilities, while other races, humans included, develop biotic powers after exposure to a compound known as element zero."

"And who is best?" Abby asked.

"The asari," they replied together.

"Humans need a little help," Shepard elaborated, turning his back on Abby and pointing to the nape of his neck. She squinted and leaned in closer, spotting a tiny metallic stud which protruded slightly out of Shepard's skin. "That's a biotic amp," he explained, turning back to her. "Humans and other races besides the asari have implants to magnify their powers, but even with that, no race comes close to the asari. They're the best."

"So is everyone here a biotic?" Abby asked, and Liara shook her head.

"All asari are biotics, but there are very few human biotics, and even fewer among other races. Shepard and Major Alenko are the only human biotics aboard the Normandy. I am the only asari here. There are no other biotics on board at present."

Abby shook her head in admiration.

"I remember you mentioning that mages weren't always treated well by some people," Shepard said. "I'm guessing you weren't one of those people. There are some who still view biotics with suspicion."

"I judge a person by their actions, not their abilities or appearance," she stated firmly.

Liara sat down next to Abby and smiled. "You do not need to tell us that. We already knew."

Shepard grinned at the two ladies before sitting back and crossing his legs. "So, Abby. You think you can handle an omni-tool?"

"Yes, I think I can handle it," she replied with cautious enthusiasm.

"Come along, then," Liara said. "I will show you how to use the onmi-tool, and you can use it to draw some of the devices you spoke of. We will see if we can find any matches."

The ladies rose, quickly followed by Shepard, and Abby dipped her head. "Thank you for inviting me into your cabin, Adam, and for supper."

"But you haven't touched a thing!" he protested.

"Ah, I fear my upbringing is to blame," she smiled. "A lady never eats between meals."

"Then take a doggy bag with you," he offered. She pulled a face, and he laughed. "I mean I could wrap up some food for you to take with you. It's just a nickname. No dogs are consumed aboard the Normandy, I can assure you," he added, folding his hands behind his back and assuming a stiff posture.

She smiled warmly at him, and he grinned back at her. "No, I am quite replete, but thank you all the same," she replied. "I am certain that Steve will be pleased to assist with the food."

"You got that right," he joked.

Liara moved to Shepard's side and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Goodnight, Shepard."

"Nite, Liara." He drew back from the asari and frowned. "Actually… Liara, would you go and set up Abby's omni-tool? There's something I need to discuss with her in private."

"Oh, I don't mind if Liara stays," Abby said.

Shepard rubbed his forehead. "This is something personal, Abby. If you want to tell Liara afterwards, then you're free to, but I'd like you to have the choice."

"I will see you in my office, Abby," said Liara, already heading for the door.

"Thanks Liara." Shepard waited until she'd departed before gesturing to the couch, and Abby re-took her seat.

"This sounds serious, Adam."

He sighed and also sat on the couch, leaving a small gap between them. "I should have told you about this sooner, but with everything else you've had to wrap your head around, well, I didn't know when would be the right time. I don't want to keep this from you any longer."

"Very well," she said solemnly, mentally preparing herself.

"Okay… without going into too much detail, Dr. Chakwas and Dr. Solus – when he was alive – made a discovery that's quite hard to believe." He took a deep breath. "They discovered that… well, that you and I are related. We share a common ancestor."

She stayed quiet for a few moments before bursting into laughter. "Adam, that is quite a joke, but there is no one else here for you to waggle your eyebrows at."

"I'm not joking, Abby," he said seriously, and her face dropped.

"But… I don't understand. How can that be? How could you possibly know that?"

"We have the ability to trace another person's DNA," he explained.

"DNA?"

"DNA is the building blocks of who we are. You know how children look like their parents? Well, that's DNA. The parent passes their DNA down to their children, and so on."

He looked at her and, seeing that her smile had completely disappeared, he sighed. "I'm sorry, Abby. I wanted to explain this to you without using a bunch of scientific jargon. It's a very complicated science, and I don't claim to understand it all that much. The doctors, however – particularly Dr. Solus – do… did understand it. You and I have something in our makeup which proves that we're related. Liara or Dr. Chakwas could probably explain it better than I have. I guess I'm asking you to trust me on this."

"I do trust you," she mumbled, "but this is…" She shook her head, unable to find the words.

"I know," he said softly. "I didn't quite believe it myself, but they showed me proof. There's no way they'd lie to me and there's no mistake."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Abby glanced at him. "What does it all mean? And… how are we related?"

"I'm not sure what it means, Abby, but I'm thinking more and more that your arrival here was no accident. And, according to Dr. Chakwas, I'm descended from one of your siblings."

"But… I only have a brother," she replied, her eyes brimming with tears, "and his family was destroyed."

He nodded and laid a hand on her arm. "I remember you telling us. Abby, this means that your brother must have gone on to have more children."

"You mean he-he survived the Blight? Remarried?"

"It looks like it," he said, reaching for a tissue box when a tear slipped down her cheek.

"Thank you," she stammered, taking a tissue and dabbing at her eyes.

"I didn't mean to upset you," he said apologetically.

"No, no… I thought he must have perished, but… are you certain of this?"

He nodded and reached for her hand. "We have the technology to determine this. Your brother survived the Blight."

They sat together for a time, each with their own thoughts. After a while, Abby released Shepard's hand and reached for a canapé. "I have decided to break the rules," she explained.

"Help yourself," he encouraged, also reaching for a snack. After swallowing it, he cleared his throat. "What was your brother's name?" he asked gently.

"Fergus."

"Fergus Cousland?"

"Yes," she replied after swallowing her bite. "He was married to Oriana, and they had a son, little Oren. They were…" She sighed, shaking her head.

"Yes, I remember now. I'm so sorry."

"Thank you, Adam." She stood up and he followed her. "If you don't mind, I would like to retire to the lounge for a while. I promise I will call on Liara, I just… need some time to myself."

"Are you okay?"

She turned to him, her chin held high. "I have just discovered that my brother survived the Blight and had another family. I am more than 'okay'," she said with a faint smile. "And, even if he no longer exists, he lives on through you. I would like some time to remember him, and to reflect."

"Of course. I understand." He walked her to the door. "I'll see you to the lounge."

"Thank you, but I know the way," she replied before leaning in and kissing Shepard on the cheek as Liara had done. "Perhaps later, or tomorrow, I could tell you how Liara and I have progressed? I am more determined than ever to find some answers."

"I'd like that. Why don't you use your omni-tool to say goodnight to me and Steve a little later?"

"Oh, I would not want to disturb you," she began.

He smiled. "Abby, trust me, once Steve gets here I won't be doing anything more strenuous than lifting a cup of coffee. And then, _maybe."_

"Very well, then," she agreed, her eyes sparkling. "I am pleased to see that you are recovering well. I will pray to the Maker that James's health will improve as swiftly."

"I'm sure he'd appreciate that. Take care, Abby. You sure you don't want a doggy bag?"

"Quite sure, thank you," she laughed, and the doors slid open. "I will… 'speak' to you later."

"I look forward to it."

He waited until she'd boarded the elevator and the doors had closed before stepping back into his cabin. He then took a seat on the couch and activated his omni-tool.

"Steve? You still working?"

"Just tidying up. You feeling okay? Finished with the ladies?"

"Yeah, they just left, and I got some canapés here with your name on them."

"Nice. Any California rolls?"

"Well, that depends how long it takes you to get here. Unless you wanted to visit James first?"

A short pause followed. "No… it's okay. I'll be right there. Hands off my rolls."

Shepard briefly wondered at Steve's reluctance to visit his friend, but shrugged and settled back into the couch. "I make no promises. Shepard out."


	7. Discretion

**Discretion is the Better Part of Valour**

Cortez released a contented sigh and closed his eyes, allowing the water to cascade over his head. He rested his forehead against the cool glass of the shower stall, the powerful jet of water rinsing the suds from his back, when he imagined he heard faint music. Stepping to the side and away from the water, he wiped the steam off the glass and squinted, seeing the blurred outline of Shepard, who was shaving at the sink, and watched him for a minute.

"Are you _whistling_?"

Shepard, his back to the shower stall, shook his head. "Nope. That would indicate chirpiness, and as you know, I don't do chirpy."

"Riiiight," drawled Steve, grinning through the glass as Adam turned around, his eyes moving downward.

"You missed a spot," Shepard pointed out with a nod towards the lower regions of Steve's body, which were still covered by soap.

Steve looked down and shrugged. "Larger parts of my anatomy require more rinsing," he boasted, and Shepard laughed, turning away to resume his shave. "I'm not too proud to ask for help, though…"

"Damn you, Cortez. You _know _I have a galaxy to save."

"You weren't thinking of the galaxy an hour ago."

"No, I wasn't. I was too busy being taken advantage of while on _medical leave_, I'll remind you."

"Ha!" Steve scoffed as he turned off the water, having completely rinsed himself off. "Nothing wrong with you. I can personally vouch for your stamina."

Shepard smiled at the mirror as Steve stepped out, wrapped a towel around his waist and moved behind Shepard, resting his chin on the commander's shoulder. "You're healthy as a horse," said Cortez, looking at Shepard's reflection. "So, since you're still on medical leave, what are your plans for today?"

"I have a few people to talk to, but I should be able to spend some time with Abby, while I actually have the time."

"Good idea. I'm sure she'd appreciate that." Steve waited while Shepard splashed his face with water and towelled himself before turning around to face Steve. "I like this, you know," Cortez said, laying his hands on the commander's hips.

"Being normal?" guessed Shepard, inching closer.

"Yeah, and I aim for us to be as normal as possible, as often as possible. Even if we can only squeeze in a couple of minutes a day."

Shepard smiled. "I know you do, and I'm grateful. Having you move up here was one of the better command decisions I've made. Purely for the sake of your CO's morale, you understand."

Steve pulled a face. "Happy to be of service," he said flatly.

Shepard laughed, pulled him close and kissed him on the lips before Steve's laughter joined his own. "Want to join me for breakfast before you start work?" Shepard asked.

"Why don't we have it up here?" Cortez suggested. "You _are _still on medical leave. I'll get dressed and grab us something from downstairs."

"Sure, why not."

"Also, I was thinking of…" Steve paused before sighing, and Shepard frowned in concern.

"What is it?"

Steve reached for another towel and began to blot his hair. "I was thinking of maybe visiting James in sick bay, but I dunno." He stopped drying himself and leaned against the sink unit, the towel bunched in his hands. "I didn't mention it last night, because I wanted you to relax, but what really happened on Cyone? Did James not hear your order? Did he misunderstand?"

Shepard's face dropped and his nostrils twitched as he breathed in. "No. He didn't misunderstand. And he heard me loud and clear – he answered me before he passed out."

"Damn it," Steve hissed, shaking his head before throwing his towel to the floor. "Damn it!"

"I know he's your friend," Shepard began, "but we had a conversation, didn't we, when we first got together. You know I can't discuss this any further. I already said too much in sick bay. This is a disciplinary matter now."

"I know, I know," Steve replied, holding his hands up. "Idiot!" he growled, swiping the towel from the floor and walking into the main part of the cabin.

Shepard gave him a little while to cool off before exiting the bathroom, finding Steve dressed and sitting on a chair, pulling his boots on. He lingered in the doorway, folding his arms. "You still gonna visit him?"

"I don't think that would be a good idea," Steve muttered. "I might end up saying something I shouldn't."

Shepard nodded in understanding. "I can appreciate that. I was angry at first, too, but even I know James made a mistake. Don't worry, I won't be too hard on him."

Steve looked up. "Why not? If he disobeyed you then he deserves it!"

"Maybe, maybe not, but he may need a friend when the time comes. Try to keep things in perspective, Steve."

"Perspective? He could have gotten you killed!" Cortez argued, standing up.

Shepard sighed and moved to Steve's side. "But he didn't. Come on. We both know life's too short to dwell on what _might_ have happened." He laid a hand on Steve's shoulder. "Let it go. Be his friend, if for no other reason than I _can't _be right now. I have to handle this. I have to be his commander."

"I'll think about it." Steve sighed and headed for the door. "What do you want to eat?"

"Um… think I'll try something different today. I'm not in the mood for bacon. Whatever you're having." Steve nodded and the door slid open as he stepped out. "You gonna be okay?" Shepard called after him.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Steve replied with a shrug as he stood in the doorway. "Guess I'm not doing too good a job of keeping things 'normal'."

Shepard tilted his head to one side and smiled. "You're doing a great job. Get that breakfast in less than five minutes, and I'll promote you to Head of Morale."

"Is that a higher pay grade?"

"Sorry."

Steve finally smiled and shook his head as he headed for the elevator. Shepard watched the cabin door close before moving to his bed and sitting down, activating his omni-tool. "Traynor? Can we go over my itinerary real quick? I'd like to free up a little time this morning."

"I think we can manage that, Commander."

~o~O~o~

The efficient specialist was as good as her word, keeping Shepard's entire morning free. Major Alenko was on standby in case an away team needed to be assembled or if Hackett or Anderson got in touch, and EDI, Joker, Adams and Cortez all took advantage of the lull to perform system checks. The atmosphere on the Normandy was relaxed and quietly productive, and Shepard took the rare opportunity to chat with a few crew members as they passed by – usually he had little time for anything but a curt nod or grunt.

He entered the Mess, hoping to catch Kaidan, and was surprised to find Abby in there, seated at a table with Liara and Garrus. He smiled, glad to see that she was settling in, and joined the threesome, taking a seat at the table and wishing his friends good morning.

"Good morning, Adam," Abby greeted him in return. "I thought I would wait here for you today, and that we might break our fast together."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Abby, I've already eaten," Shepard said. "I broke with my usual routine today."

"Yes, I know," she replied with a smile. "Rupert told me that Steve had ordered breakfast for you both. Then he mumbled something about how he'd make more money if he turned this 'joint' into a… take-out?"

Shepard rolled his eyes. "That sounds about right."

"Either way, I'm very pleased to hear that you're taking it easy. Did you and Steve have a pleasant evening?"

"We did, thank you. You didn't say goodnight to us. Did you get your omni-tool?"

Abby nodded and shared an enthusiastic glance with Liara. "I could have said goodnight, but decided not to in case you were sleeping. Liara has been very helpful in showing me how to use the omni-tool."

Shepard folded his arms, wearing a faint smile. "Let's see it, then."

She sat up straight and cleared her throat before raising her right arm slightly, and her omni-tool lit up. "Um, Commander Shepard? Hello?"

Shepard unfolded his arms as his own omni-tool glowed. "Shepard here," he said seriously, and Abby chuckled. "What's this about?"

"I was wondering if you'd care to join me in the Mess, if you're not too busy?"

"On my way. Shepard out."

"Cousland out," Abby finished before laughing along with her new friends.

"I have also instructed Abby how to purchase goods," said Liara, "but she has no funds at present."

"That's okay," replied Shepard, entering an instruction into his omni-tool. "I'll put her on my expenses. Next time we visit the Citadel, Abby, you can go shopping. Maybe Liara or Steve will go along with you. They're into that kind of thing."

"Oh, are these your own funds?" she asked. "I would not want to–"

"No. I'm allocated a certain amount of expenses by Alliance HQ for entertaining dignitaries, things like that. I never use it."

"Yeah, visiting dignitaries eat what _we_ eat and like it," Garrus provided with a pointed look at Shepard.

"Damn straight," Shepard agreed before addressing Abby. "It's a pretty small amount. You won't be depriving the Alliance of war supplies or anything like that. Oh, and if you need anything, put in a requisition order with EDI."

"And if you need guns or armor, Vega's your man," Garrus said helpfully. "You know. In case Shepard gets outta line. It wouldn't be the first time."

"She _won't_ need anything like that, thanks all the same," Shepard replied, shaking his head. "Anyway, Abby, I was hoping we could spend the morning together, unless you've made plans? I'd like to talk to you in more detail about your experiences during the Blight. It'd be interesting to see if there are any parallels with my own experiences. We might not get the chance again once I'm back on duty."

"I would love to," she said eagerly, "and no, I have not made any plans besides meeting Liara for lunch."

"That's settled, then. Shall we go to the lounge? Less interruptions there," he said, looking directly at Garrus, who gave a rasping chuckle.

"Of course." Abby stood up, quickly followed by Shepard, and they said goodbye to Garrus and Liara before leaving the Mess.

"How are you feeling this morning?" she asked on the way to the lounge.

"Much better," he replied with a faint smile. "I'm hoping to be cleared for full duties by the end of the day."

"That's wonderful news. And how is James?"

"Dr. Chakwas informs me that he's on his way to a full recovery, although he'll need to spend a little longer in sick bay."

"Have you not been to visit him, then?" she enquired before her face fell a little. "I mean… I suppose there has not been enough time."

"Something like that. You seem to be settling in well," he commented, quickly changing the subject.

"Oh, I am. Your friends and crew really have made me feel very welcome," she said before halting, a troubled look crossing her face.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

She shook her head before looking up at him and sighing. "I have something to confess," she said heavily. "I'm afraid I heard your conversation when you brought James into the sick bay."

"Oh."

"I wasn't listening deliberately," she added hastily, "it's just that I was standing quite close to the window and–"

"No, I'm the one who should be apologising," he reassured her. "I'm sorry you heard that. It was unprofessional of me."

They shared a moment of silence before Abby cleared her throat. "What will happen to him?"

Shepard looked down the corridor and then gestured to the lounge door. "Let's go inside."

They entered the lounge and Abby invited Shepard to take a seat on the couch, which he did. She remained standing, however, her hands folded together. "Is he in serious trouble?" she asked quietly.

"I'll be having a discussion with James once he's cleared for duty."

"Oh. I'm sorry. I'm asking too many questions."

He shook his head and gestured to the chair next to him, waiting until Abby sat down. "No, you're not. I guess I can't blame you after what you heard. This is something that James and I need to deal with, and it would be inappropriate to discuss it in detail with anyone else. And, yes, I'm fully aware that I did just that in sick bay," he admitted with a wry twist of his mouth.

"I understand, Adam. Leading people you've grown close to can be a complicated thing. I learned that the hard way," she replied. "I would expect that travelling together, your meals and leisure time all shared, makes for a very close-knit group."

"It does," he agreed but waited for her to elaborate.

"I had a similar situation during the Blight," she explained. "We fought side-by-side. We slept, ate, shared our stories, and consoled one another, all in a small camp. No matter what our mission or where we were, at the end of the day, we all returned to one another. It was our safe haven in the darkness."

He nodded. "Sounds familiar."

"It gave us strength, that connection to one another, but it made it hard for some to submit to their orders as they should have. I can tell you I had more than my fair share of confrontations with Sten and Oghren. Battle can do that, blur the lines of duty and service where they otherwise would be clear."

"I hear that," he agreed before falling silent.

She watched him for a minute before turning towards him. "Would it be inappropriate if I asked about your mission on Tuchanka, now that a few days have passed? You appeared quite preoccupied upon your return, despite the mission being a success."

He hung his head a little and sighed. "I lost a good friend during that mission."

"Do you mean Dr. Solus? I… heard from someone else."

He nodded. "It's a long story. Basically, the krogan were infected with a disease which prevented them from reproducing, and their population was dwindling. Dr. Solus helped fashion a cure. Shortly before we left for the planet, I was contacted by an enemy of the krogan who promised me an army of scientists to help with the war effort… _if _I sabotaged the cure."

Abby's mouth opened, but she said nothing.

"I actually considered it briefly," he confessed. "My whole reason for being here is to accumulate war assets in the form of vessels, technology and people. The salarians would have made a sizeable contribution."

"But you decided not to sabotage the cure," she guessed.

He shook his head. "It took about thirty seconds of _considering _it to know I couldn't do it. The krogan leader is also a good friend of mine, and I believe his people will flourish under his leadership. They deserved a chance. But making that decision resulted in Mordin's death. If I _had_ decided to sabotage the cure, I think he might have gone along with it, after a lot of persuasion, and we'd have a team of brilliant salarian scientists as well as the krogan clans."

"But the krogan people would eventually have died out."

He nodded, his eyes glazing over. "Damned if you do, damned if you don't. That should be my epitaph."

She watched him for a moment longer before rising and joining him on the couch.

"During our travels, we visited a village called Redcliffe," she said. "We discovered that a young boy – a mage – had been inhabited by a demon, which sent hordes of undead to terrorise the village each night." She paused to take a breath, seeing his blue eyes, wide in her peripheral vision. "There were those who practised dark magics, and there was one such mage at Redcliffe. He offered a solution – he could end the demon's hold over the boy, but would require a life in return. The boy's mother volunteered."

She slowly looked at Adam, seeing pity and understanding in his eyes. "A decision had to be made quickly and I agreed. Damned if you do, damned if you don't," she said bitterly.

"Hey," he whispered, slipping an arm around her shoulders. "You saved the boy _and _the village, by the sound of it."

She gave him a quick smile, which faded almost immediately. "Alistair had something to say about it, though," she related. "I don't think I've ever seen him so angry. I feared he would explode at one point. I can't say I blame him."

"But he came round, right?"

"He did… eventually. We had a long talk. He didn't agree with what I did, but admitted he wouldn't have had the nerve to make the decision himself. He said he was glad one of us did."

"Sounds like he was a good friend to have. He disagreed with you but stood by you nonetheless."

She nodded. "He was my dearest friend. We kept each other whole, quite a feat considering we were facing an army of soulless creatures," she replied, her voice hushed. "I miss him very much."

"We'll do our best to find out what happened to him," Adam promised. "To all of them. I've tried to imagine how it would feel to be suddenly cut off from my friends, my whole way of life. I swear to you I won't stop until you have some answers."

"But you are already doing so much more than I could have hoped for," she said, her smile returning, "and you have so many other things to think about. You don't owe me anything, Adam."

"Sure I do," he replied innocently. "I've got to take care of my Aunty Abby."

Her face screwed up and she laughed. "Ugh! _Please _don't call me that again! It makes me sound so old!"

He looked at her sideways before clearing his throat. "You _are _aware that you're a thousand years older than me?"

She folded her arms, pushing her lower lip outward. "Well, I _had_ thought you a gentleman, Adam Shepard."

"I've never claimed to be one."

"And with good reason."

Their eyes met and they laughed again, Shepard pulling her closer and squeezing her shoulder. "Listen," he began. "There's another member of my crew I'd like you to meet. She's the most important of all of them, but she _is _rather unusual."

"Are you talking about EDI? I remember James saying that she has a body, and that she works on the bridge."

"That's right. She's always asking about you, but doesn't want to just show up at your quarters. She's very aware that you might find her appearance… different."

"What does she look like?"

"Her body's made of a flexible, mimetic alloy that… actually, let's just call it metal. She doesn't wear clothing, but she's not naked, exactly. She's covered up where she needs to be covered up."

Abby blinked. "Metal? She must be very strong."

"We haven't fully tested her body's capabilities, but I've seen her push a Mako onto its side to make room. I don't think she could _lift _one, though… oh, that's something else we'll show you when time allows. It's an armored vehicle weighing around six tons, or twelve thousand pounds."

She stared at him in disbelief. "You're… not joking, are you?"

He shook his head. "Oh, and you need to watch out for her sense of humor. She also likes to make jokes. I think you'll like her. I've just remembered that I need to go to the bridge to speak to her. Should I bring her back with me?"

"Yes, I would like that," she replied, and Shepard noticed that she seemed a little wary.

"There's nothing to be afraid of. But if you're not completely comfortable, that's fine. We'll leave it for now."

"Oh, no, I was merely thinking of Caridin."

"Caridin?"

"He was a golem, fashioned from steel, who we encountered in the Deep Roads. He must have been… four meters tall, and just as wide."

"EDI's about 5'9", and as wide as you."

"Oh," she laughed. "Well, in that case, she should have no trouble fitting into the lounge."

"No, she won't," agreed Shepard, standing up. "I won't be gone long."

Abby also stood up and glanced at the door. "May I visit James in the sick bay while you are gone?" she asked.

"Of course. I do need to ask you, though, not to repeat anything we've discussed concerning James."

She dipped her head. "I understand, Adam. You have my word."

He smiled. "Thank you. I think he'll be very happy to see you. How about we meet back here in… half an hour?"

"That sounds perfect," she agreed, and he gestured towards the door, allowing her to go first.

**xXx**

Abby walked into the med bay, pleased to see that James was sitting up and talking with Dr. Chakwas. She approached quietly, mindful not to interrupt the doctor, and waited to be acknowledged.

Dr. Chakwas turned to her as James smiled. "Hey, Abby!" he greeted.

"Good morning, Abby. I hope you're feeling well today," Chakwas added.

"I am, thank you," she replied, watching with interest as the doctor ran a medical scan of James's chest, while trying _not_ to notice his half-dressed state. "I, uh, I came to see how James was feeling. I apologize if I'm disrupting a treatment. Shall I go?"

"Not in the least," Chakwas replied, her omni-tool shutting down. "I've just finished a diagnostic of our lieutenant's lung capacity. He's all yours to entertain while I process this data."

Abby nodded to the doctor as she passed, returning to her work area across the bay. Turning back to James, she cleared her throat. "Do you, I mean, would you like me to give you a moment to dress?"

He glanced down at his naked torso and shrugged. "I'm good, she'll just be back in a bit to stick me with more stuff anyway."

"Oh, right," she replied, averting her eyes. "How are you?"

He arched an eyebrow. "Do you want me to put a shirt on? I wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable. I'm sorry, we're just in the med bay–"

"No, it's… it's fine, please. Are you feeling better?"

He reached behind himself and picked up a sleeveless undershirt, pulling it over his head and covering his chest.

"Yeah, I feel good today, breathing is a lot easier," he answered as he adjusted the bunched fabric. "Anything new with you?"

"Liara and I will be having lunch together today. I'm also going to meet EDI," she explained. "I'm glad you're better, James. I was worried for you."

"So that's why you came by, huh? Not just to see me with my shirt off," he joked, waggling his eyebrows and smiling. He was surprised at the deepness of her blush.

"Oh, well, I…"

He chuckled. "Sorry, Abby, I'm just teasin' you," he assured her. "You've probably already figured out I'm kind of a flirt."

She met his eyes evenly. "Oh, I've noticed."

They were quiet for a moment, their gazes locked until Abby smiled softly and glanced down at her hands.

He felt his heart skip a beat, acutely aware that she'd not rejected his modest advance. He tried not to show it. "So, uh, do you play any cards where you're from? Ferelden?" he asked, unable to resist leaning toward her. "Maybe you could teach me a game or two?"

"You mean games of chance?"

"Yeah, sure."

"We did, but I'm afraid I can't teach you any of them," she confessed. "My father didn't approve of me learning such games, since the only people I could have played with would have been the soldiers under Father's command, or the men at the pub."

He nodded slowly, his eyes still locked with hers. "I can't blame him for that. A woman surrounded by a bunch of men in a bar isn't a good combo, especially a woman who looks like you do. Sounds like your dad was a smart guy."

"Looks like I do?"

"Yeah, you know, beautiful."

She blushed again and he smiled at it. "Anyway, I guess that means you've never played poker?"

"No," she answered, resting her hip against the bed. "Will you teach me?"

"Have a seat," he said with a smile, patting the end of his bed.

~o~O~o~

"S'up, Commander?" Joker asked as Shepard stepped onto the bridge before leaning against the pilot's chair.

"Everything okay up here?"

"Yeah, we're just waiting for the diagnostic to complete. Not a whole lot going on."

"Good. In that case, as I'm still considered an invalid by Dr. Chakwas, I'd like to borrow your 'Mobility Assistance Mech'."

EDI swivelled her chair around, stood up and moved to Shepard's side. "That role is merely a cover to protect my true identity as an AI when I am on the Citadel. However, if you are in need of assistance, this body can provide aid."

Shepard grinned, his eyes dancing with mischief. "Oh, well, in that case, never mind."

EDI studied the commander for a moment. "I have misunderstood, haven't I? You were attempting humor."

"_Attempting?"_ exclaimed Joker. "Ouch, Boss."

Shepard laughed. "Something like that," he replied. "EDI, if you have some time, I'd like to introduce you to Abby. She's visiting James at the moment, but if you're free, I'll take you to her quarters to introduce you in a little while."

"That is acceptable, Shepard. I am looking forward to meeting her."

"I also wanted to talk to you in private," he said, lowering his voice. "I might need to begin Article 15* proceedings against a crew member, and I'd like your counsel when the time comes."

"Very well. Accessing Uniform Code of Military Justice. Complete. I am at your disposal when required."

"Any questions?" Shepard asked.

EDI glanced sidelong at Joker. "Yes, but I will wait until we are alone before I ask them."

"Oh? That's new, isn't it?"

"Not in this instance. I realize that this is a private matter regarding a member of the crew. On a related note, Jeff has begun teaching me how to exercise discretion when I am interacting with organics. It is apparently a desirable human trait."

"It is, though I'm surprised that it was Joker, of _all_ people, who pointed that out to you."

"Thanks, Commander," Joker grumbled from his chair.

"How's it going?" Shepard asked EDI.

"It is going well." She placed a hand on her elbow, bringing her other hand to her chin. "For example, earlier this morning, Jeff asked me if you had vacated your cabin. I replied that you had, but were unavailable. I did _not_ inform him, however, that you were unavailable because you were in the men's restroom on deck three, or that the duration of your visit was eleven minutes and forty-four seconds. I have observed that bodily functions are often a source of embarrassment or amusement among humans."

"EDI," an exasperated Joker interrupted. "That's _not _being discreet. That's bragging that you _are _discreet while being _in_discreet. Jeez."

"I do not understand how I am being indiscreet when Shepard is right here," she replied, and the commander palmed his face. "_He_ is fully aware that he was…"

"Taking a dump? Yeah, but_ I_ wasn't, until now, that is," Joker groaned, shaking his head. "Thanks for the awesome mental image, by the way."

EDI's expression remained unchanged as she considered Joker's words. "I see. My apologies, Shepard. Clearly, more study is required to fully master the art of discretion."

"That's… okay, EDI," mumbled Shepard, uncovering his face. "It's an improvement, anyway. Let's go find a quiet place to talk, and I'll apprise you of the Article 15 case."

"Yeah, like nobody knows it's James," muttered Joker.

"Lieutenant," Shepard warned, and the pilot held his hands up.

"All right! I was just saying."

"I'd recommend finding yourself a new teacher, EDI," Shepard advised as they left the bridge. "Otherwise, it's like the blind leading the blind."

"I heard that!"

**xXx**

Abby laughed gleefully, a beautiful smile on her face. "I believe, Lieutenant, that I win this hand," she announced, revealing her pair of aces.

With a slow grin, James nodded. "Yup, you've got me beat with that pair," he admitted, reaching for her cards and beginning to shuffle the deck. "Funny, that's the third win for you. You know more than you're letting on, don't you?"

"Me? I would _never_ mislead you, James," she answered with a sly smile. "I'm an honest girl and wouldn't know a thing about these sort of games," she finished before reaching out and taking the deck from his hands. She then began to shuffle them with a speed and agility second only to the dealers he'd seen at the Silver Coast casino on the Citadel.

He laughed, shaking his head. "Hustled, that's what's happening here. I'm gettin' hustled by the new chick."

She dealt another round, smiling as she fanned her own hand out.

"So, ah, Abby, I was going to ask you if you're feelin' any better about all of this? Being here?" he asked, watching her carefully. "Last time we talked you were, you know, dealing with a lot of, ah, _stuff_."

"By 'stuff' do you refer to my absolute and total panic attack the other night?"

He went still. "Uh, I wasn't trying to say _that_, I just–"

She shook her head. "Stop, it's fine, you're allowed to ask. I know I lost all good sense and reason for a bit, but you and Steve were a big help. And to answer your question, yes, I'm feeling much better."

"I hated seeing you afraid," he admitted. "I'm not trying to bring it all up, unless you want to talk about it. I just want to make sure you're okay."

"I am. I know I still have a great deal to work through, but I know I'm safe and that I'm not alone."

"No, you're not alone. I'm right here," he said, something new in his eyes. He blinked a few times and looked down at his hand, clearing his throat. "Uh, I mean, _we're_ right here, you know, the commander and the rest of us, if you need help or whatever."

"Well, thank you."

They quietly played their next round and this time he won, but as she began to shuffle the deck, he reached for the cards, taking them from her hands.

"Where'd you learn to do that?" he asked, fumbling with the cards. "I can shuffle, no problem, but that arching thing where they all sort from top to bottom? I can't do it."

"That's actually rather easy," she said, scooting up to him, their knees now touching as she faced him on the bed. She carefully took the cards and shifted his large hands, positioning the deck in them so she could show him what to do.

He leaned close, trying to focus on something other than how near she was to him.

"See? If you turn your thumb like this," she began to say, looking up and pausing, her eyes briefly moving to his lips. She shook her head slightly, her eyes moving back to his hands. "Um, if you, uh, just turn your thumb–"

"Abby?"

She stilled, her hand on his as she looked back up, meeting his eyes. "Yes?"

Silently he let the deck slide free of his grip and with a slow and deliberate motion, touched her face. He leaned forward and kissed her.

She kissed him back.

"Excuse me," said a familiar voice.

They broke apart, each blushing like embarrassed teenagers, as Dr. Chakwas arrived at James's bedside.

"This is a medical bay, Lieutenant, not a venue for a date," the doctor scolded good-naturedly.

"Oh, Maker," Abby breathed, clambering off the bed, the deck of cards spilling everywhere. "I'm so sorry, I'll clean that up!"

James, beet red, swung his legs over the side of the bed. "No, I'll get it!"

"No, _I'll_ take care of it," Chakwas argued, a hand on James's shoulder, preventing him from standing. "Nothing to apologize for, Abby, nothing at all. But I do need to scan the lieutenant and check his oxygen saturation levels, so I'm afraid we'll need a moment of privacy."

Abby met James's eyes, her mouth moving but no words coming out.

"Will this take long, Doc?" James asked Chakwas, his gaze on Abby, who was biting her lip and looking very uncertain of herself. "Abby was teaching me a new way to shuffle the deck."

"Is that what it's called these days?" the doctor quipped. "No more than ten minutes."

"I-I should really get going," Abby stammered, backing up and bumping against the adjacent bed. She looked over her shoulder and scooted around the bed. "I'm glad you're feeling better, James!"

She left the med bay quickly, not looking back as she did.

Chakwas scanned his neck and chest, but said nothing.

He slumped back against his pillows. "Shit."

_* A non-judicial punishment (NJP) in the United States Armed Forces is a form of military justice authorized by Article 15 of the Uniform Code of Military Justice. Non-judicial punishment or 'NJP' permits commanding officers to administratively discipline troops without a court-martial. Punishments vary depending on the severity of the infraction. The receipt of non-judicial punishment does not constitute a criminal conviction (it's equivalent to a civil action), but is placed in the service record of the individual, and is likely to have a negative impact on future promotion/career prospects._


	8. Back to Earth

**Back to Earth with a Bump**

Shepard and EDI waited outside the lounge, hoping that Abby had returned from sick bay. After a minute the doors opened, and they stepped inside.

"I see you've learned to use verbal commands to open the door," Shepard said as Abby slowly rose from her chair, her well-practised diplomatic smile in place. Shepard halted a few feet away from her, and EDI did the same. "Abby, I'd like to introduce you to EDI," he said, gesturing at his companion.

"It is good to meet you, Lady Cousland," EDI began, offering her hand.

Abby took a few steps forward, doing her best not to gawk, and touched EDI's hand, astonishment registering on her face as the AI's fingers wrapped around her own. "How do you do, EDI? It's a real pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"I 'do' very well. Thank you for your inquiry," answered EDI with a hint of amusement as she released Abby's hand.

"You're… warm," Abby stated. "I'm… oh, forgive me. It's just, I wasn't expecting that. I didn't mean to be rude."

"No apology is necessary. Many organics exhibit surprise that my exosuit feels warm to the touch. If you wish, I would be pleased to explain in detail how that is accomplished. I have noticed, however, that some appear distracted when I do so."

"How about another time?" Shepard suggested. "Abby's only just learned to use an omni-tool. She might find the internal workings of a gynoid infiltration unit a little…"

"Distracting," EDI finished. "Understood. I will exercise discretion on this occasion."

Abby's eyes moved rapidly between the twosome and, noticing this, Shepard smiled. "Well, that's enough technical talk. Don't mind us, Abby."

"Oh, not at all," she said politely, gesturing to the seating area. "Please, sit down."

"Thank you, Lady Cousland," EDI said as she took a seat next to Shepard on the couch.

"Please, call me Abby. May I fetch you a drink? _Do _you drink?"

"No, thank you. I do not require sustenance." EDI tilted her head to one side. "Do you feel well, Abby? You appear to be perspiring."

"No, I'm fine!" she quickly protested, but did not sit down.

"Are you sure?" Shepard asked. "You _do_ look a little flustered. Is it EDI? Is she making you nervous?"

"I will leave if you wish," said the AI, and Abby stared at them both in horror.

"It's fine," said Shepard, noticing Abby's reaction. "EDI doesn't take offence at things like we do."

Abby immediately took a seat on the chair next to the end of the couch where EDI was seated. "No! Please don't leave! It's not you, EDI, I swear. I just… um, rushed to get back here from sick bay. I was worried I'd be late."

"But your body language indicates that you may be–" EDI began to argue, but stopped when Shepard touched her arm.

"Let's just drop it," he whispered before clearing his throat. "Anyway," he said, forcing a cheerful tone, "how was James?"

"He appeared quite well," Abby replied, sitting up straight and noticing that EDI was watching her intently. "Dr. Chakwas was performing several tests on him."

At that moment, Shepard's omni-tool pinged. "Shepard here."

"It's Doctor Chakwas, Commander."

"We were just talking about you," he said with a smile.

"Oh? All good, I hope."

"Mostly," he quipped. "So what can I do for you?"

"I've cleared Lieutenant Vega for duty in the armory, and he's eager to return. He is _not _cleared for combat, however, until further notice. I'll reassess him on a daily basis."

Shepard nodded. "How long, Doc? Roughly?"

"I'd say forty-eight hours at the most, but twenty-four is more likely."

"Good. And what about me? I feel fine, you know."

"From what I've heard, you are going about your business as usual despite being on medical leave," the doctor said in a resigned tone. "Remember that _you_ are still not cleared for combat, either. I will see you this evening, when I expect to return you to full duties. _No_ combat until then," she added sternly.

"Got it. Catch you later, Doc." He deactivated his omni-tool and stared ahead, frowning slightly.

"That's very good news, Adam," said Abby, finally smiling.

"It is." He stood up, and Abby recognised the change in his demeanour. "Would you excuse me?" he asked them. "There's something I need to take care of."

Both Abby and EDI suspected the reason for Shepard's departure but, in the spirit of discretion, did not call attention to it.

"Of course," Abby said.

"I'll be back in a little while." Shepard nodded to them before heading for the door and leaving.

Abby waited until the door had closed before clearing her throat. "Well, EDI, would you like me to show you around?"

"I am familiar with the layout of the Port Observation Lounge. However, I am aware that many organic females take pleasure and pride in showing their acquaintances around their domiciles." She looked around the lounge. "I like what you have done with the place. It is very… cosy."

"Thank you!" Abby grinned, and they both stood up. "Would you like to see the statue Liara gave me? She told me it's from a place called Ilium."

"I would enjoy that," replied EDI. "Please proceed."

~o~O~o~

"Hey! Jimmy's back! _Yeah!"_ James announced loudly as he swaggered into the shuttle bay, pumping his fist. To his right, Steve was working on the Kodiak and looked over his shoulder briefly before returning to his task.

"James."

Vega frowned, wondering at his friend's cool reaction, before quickly deciding that poor Esteban was overworked as usual. He approached the pilot and peered over his shoulder for a minute or two. When Cortez still didn't look at him, James decided to cheer him up.

"You miss me, Esteban?" he asked, giving his friend a hefty slap on the back. Cortez immediately went rigid and James sharply retracted his hand.

"I managed, thanks." Cortez moved away from James, still not looking at him, and James felt irritation and hurt prick at him.

"Hey, thanks for coming to visit me in sick bay, by the way," he remarked, his sarcasm apparent despite his attempt to keep his tone casual. "I was only in there for, you know, nearly _two days_."

"In case you weren't aware, I've been on my own down here. Garrus helped out a little, but he has his own duties to take care of. I didn't exactly have a lot of time on my hands. But, as I said before, I managed."

James stared at Cortez's back, his mouth half-open. This wasn't what usually happened when James reported for duty. On a normal day, they'd shoot the shit for a while and then Esteban would tell him to get to work. Cortez wasn't his superior, but he ran a tight operation in the shuttle bay, and James liked to pretend he wasn't interested in doing anything. Cortez would then start nagging him, and James would 'reluctantly' start work. That was their routine, and James liked it.

Today, however, Esteban wasn't sticking to the routine, and James began to feel uncomfortable with the change.

"Maybe I should start work, then?"

"Maybe you should."

James waited another moment before huffing and walking to his work station, a very unpleasant feeling in his stomach. He glanced back a couple of times, finding Esteban hard at work, his back to James. He hadn't even _looked _at him.

After a few minutes of aimlessly shuffling items around his work top, James decided that he wouldn't be able to get anything done in this atmosphere, and walked back to the Kodiak, stopping just behind Cortez and folding his arms. "All right, what's eating you? If you're pissed about what happened on Cyone, you should know that Shepard wants to see me later, and I'm pretty sure he's gonna hand my ass to me over that."

Cortez continued to work with his back to James. "Good."

"Is that what this is about? That I was stupid and nearly got myself killed? I know that, Esteban, and believe me, I learned my lesson."

He was met with silence and, as he watched Cortez work, he noticed the pilot's shoulders tense.

"Hey, at least I didn't crash the Kodiak this time, right?" he joked, his voice a semitone higher than usual. "Okay, I know I nearly bought it, but–" He stopped abruptly as Cortez rose to his full height and turned towards him.

"What do you want, a medal for bravery?" asked Steve, his tone hard.

"Okay… at least now you're looking at me," James said, realising he'd need to tread carefully as he'd never seen Esteban lose his temper before, and didn't want to provoke him. He was obviously pissed about _something._ "Come on, let me have it. Say what's on your mind."

Steve watched him for a beat before replying, and it was obvious he was struggling to keep his cool. "You think I cared about the Kodiak when you crashed it?"

James held his hands up. "No, I didn't mean that, I know you musta been worried about me. I just meant–"

"You think I was worried about _you_?" Steve scoffed. "How about the three people you almost killed? Remember? Shepard, Alenko, Liara? You missed them by a few feet!"

James's brows met, anger flashing in his eyes. "Hey, I had to do something! That robot – I mean EDI – I mean, ah, hell, whatever! It was gettin' away with the data!"

"The Kodiak has cannons!" Steve reminded him, quickly closing the gap between them. "You should have pursued the other shuttle! Any IFS* cadet would have known that!"

"Look, Esteban, I had to think of something fast!"

"And were you thinking fast when you disobeyed an order from Shepard that almost resulted in you–"

"I didn't disobey him! I just… I just _suggested_ we should take care of all the Reapers before getting outta there!"

"That almost resulted in you and him getting _killed?" _Cortez resumed, his voice rising in volume.

"Come on, Esteban, don't you think you're being a little–" James began before Steve pointed a finger at Vega's face, startling him.

"None of the 'Esteban' crap, James. _Not_ today," the pilot seethed before turning his back and walking away. It was obvious he wasn't finished, however, when he halted and stood still for a few seconds.

"I know all about the 'talk' you had with Shepard when you first found out that he and I had hooked up," he said, slowly turning around, shaking his head at James's puzzled expression. "You know, the 'Esteban's already lost a husband, so don't you get dying' talk?"

James sighed. "You know about that?"

"Well, yeah, people who are together usually _tell_ each other things. You know what? I was really touched when I found out. I thought, 'What a great friend I have there. Someone who wants what's best for me'."

"Okay," James mumbled, bracing himself.

"Well, for someone who's so against Shepard getting himself killed, you seem to be doing your damndest to make it happen!" Steve accused, again pointing at James. "And you think I need to lose my friend as well on top of that? Is this all just a game to you? Because it isn't! This is about people's lives, James! Real people!"

James stared at Steve, realising that his laid-back, softly-spoken friend was losing his temper. Because of him. And he didn't like the way that felt. Finally, the potential consequences of his actions started to sink in, and he hung his head. "Hey, I…"

"You wanna play the hero? Go right ahead. It's your life. But _don't _bring Shepard in on your heroics," Cortez hissed. "I can't protect him once he's down on the ground, and that's one of the hardest things to take. But _you_ can. That's what you're _supposed_ to do. And that means not throwing your own life away when you're supposed to have his back! You think I want to lose either of you?"

"Yeah, I-I see your point, Est… uh. Steve."

Cortez slowly walked up to James and stood about a foot in front of him. When he spoke, his voice was quieter, but his blue eyes were intense. "I've finally made peace with Robert's loss and found happiness with someone new, something I thought would never happen again. You wanna completely fuck up my life, James? Just keep on the way you're going."

James watched in silence as Steve returned to the Kodiak. For a second he was tempted to follow him, but decided against it. "Sorry, man," he muttered, his stomach churning.

~o~O~o~

A little later, James was called up to Shepard's cabin via the intercom, but it wasn't Shepard who summoned him – it was Traynor. James was already nervous following the altercation with Cortez, but there had been something in the specialist's voice, something stiff and formal, that had put James right on edge. And she'd kept calling him _Lieutenant. _Hell, Traynor never called him that – it was always _James._

"_So, uh, what kind of mood's the commander in, Traynor?"_

"_That's not for me to say, Lieutenant. He's expecting you. I wouldn't keep him waiting."_

He arrived outside the cabin and, after a brief pause to collect himself, pressed the sensor at the side of the door, which immediately opened. He slowly walked in, finding Shepard seated on his couch, studying a data pad. James stood to attention and saluted, and Shepard glanced up for a second before returning his attention to his data pad.

"Take a seat, Lieutenant."

"Thank you, sir."

James sat in an armchair opposite to Shepard's couch, a small table separating them. His heart began to pound as it became apparent that Traynor was not there, as James had expected. So why hadn't _Shepard_ called him up? Was this an 'official' thing? Was Shepard distancing himself from James? Trying to intimidate him? A dozen different possibilities raced through James's mind, and none of them were good.

After a few minutes, Shepard laid down his data pad and looked up. "How are you feeling now?"

"Good, Commander. Got a lot done today. Although Garrus did a great job while I was gone. So did Esteban. Well, he always does…" He trailed off and shrugged.

"Glad to hear it," Shepard said before sitting up straight. "I've called you here today so we can discuss the events that took place during the mission on Cyone. This is a preliminary, informal discussion, and the first step before NJP* for disciplinary infractions is implemented. Do you understand so far?"

"I understand, sir," James replied around a dry mouth.

"Since we're aren't proceeding with formal punishment at this time, you won't actually need a representative, but I want you to know that if this escalates, you'll have one appointed for you. For now, EDI is acting as my advisor on UCMJ* code and procedure."

James nodded.

"Now, if you want someone here during our conversation, I'm willing to bend protocol on this occasion, but I strongly encourage you to say so now. You'll need them if this goes to the next step and it might be a good idea to have their advice now."

"Uh… if it's all the same to you, Commander, I don't need no one. I trust you, sir."

"All right." Shepard cleared his throat. "Lieutenant Vega, during the mission on Cyone, you disobeyed a lawful order from your commanding officer, resulting in serious injury to yourself, lesser injuries to your CO and leaving other members of the landing party vulnerable to attack. What do you have to say?"

"Sir… I didn't intend to disobey you," James began. "I just said that there were a couple more marauders around the corner and we should take care of 'em before heading back."

"So you didn't hear me order you to stand down?"

There was a brief pause. "Yes, sir. I heard you."

"And did you obey me?"

James stared down at his boots, slowly shaking his head.

"Did you believe that my order was unlawful? Incorrect? Unreasonable?"

"No, sir," James sighed, his eyes still cast downward. "None of those things."

"Then why?"

James closed his eyes for a second. "I was… kinda keyed up, you know?" he explained, opening his eyes and glancing up, finding a stony-faced Shepard looking back at him. "I guess I don't like leaving things unfinished."

"None of us do, Lieutenant. But that wasn't your call to make. I have a duty of care to my crew and your actions meant I very nearly failed. I heard the saturation warning in my suit and knew that you'd also have had the warning. I disengaged and ordered you to fall back, but you continued to engage the Reaper troops. I then ordered you to stand down _immediately_. I was very clear. You told me you'd be there – and I quote – 'in just a minute', at which point you collapsed. I then received a call from Garrus, who was on the other side of the facility with Captain Riley, requesting urgent assistance as they were overrun. As you were unconscious by that point, you won't have heard it. EDI can replay the mission logs from time index–"

James held up a hand, shaking his head. "That won't be necessary, sir. I'll take your word for it."

Shepard nodded. "What I should have done, James, was leave you for dead and go help the others," he said, a steely edge to his voice, "but I didn't. I dragged your fully-armored body for fifty yards, up steps and around equipment, all whilst trying to hold my breath, until we were clear of the gas. So I guess_ I_ didn't follow procedure properly either, huh?"

James remained silent, a deep frown carved into his brow, when EDI spoke.

"I would remind you, Shepard, that infractions of this severity usually warrant full Non-Judicial Punishment being brought to bear. A counselling session such as this would normally be bypassed. I would also remind you that this is the second occasion where it has been necessary to speak with Lieutenant Vega concerning disciplinary infractions."

"I'm aware of that, EDI, but we're at war and I need all the experienced soldiers I can get," Shepard replied before addressing James. "If I hadn't gotten to Garrus and Riley in time, they'd be dead, and their deaths would have been on me because I didn't respond to them in time. If I'd just left you, you would have undoubtedly been decorated for valor – _posthumously_. How the hell nobody died during that mission is beyond me." He leaned forward and fixed James with a hard stare. "When we're on the ground, we're supposed to have each other's backs. I'm supposed to cover you, or rescue you, if need be, from hostile forces. What I am _not _supposed to do is rescue you from yourself. You have no idea how disappointed I am with you right now."

Met with continued silence from James, he sat back and sighed, waiting a minute before resuming. "You're one of the finest soldiers I've ever served with, James. When all this is over, you'll be going to N7 school, and you'll no doubt be made XO of an Alliance ship upon successful completion of it. _If _you live that long. You're standing at a crossroads. Be sure you take the right path."

"Yes, sir," James mumbled, his voice catching.

Shepard picked up his data pad and made a quick note. "This counselling session will not be noted in your record at this time. If, however, you fail to comply with your superior officers' lawful orders again, war or not, I _will_ proceed with an NJP and this conversation will be added to the evidence.

I have no problem with my crew speaking their minds or even disagreeing with me on occasion. I'm not always right. But once I give a lawful order, I _require _it to be followed. Pull a stunt like that again and you'll be subject to full Alliance disciplinary procedures, meaning confinement for thirty days and reduction of rank. Furthermore, I will remove your name from the landing party roster, meaning you'll never be trusted with away missions again."

Shepard tossed the data pad onto the table and sat back, folding his arms. "I don't think I need to tell you, James, that those measures will be academic, as once that stage has been reached, you can pretty much kiss your career goodbye. Do you have any questions."

James took a deep breath before shaking his head. "No, sir."

Shepard stared at him for a minute longer before picking up the data pad and standing up. "EDI, this 'informal conversation' is over."

"Acknowledged."

"This is strike two, James. _Don't_ destroy everything you've worked for," Shepard said to Vega. "Dismissed."

James stood up, snapped a quick salute, and Shepard did the same. "Commander, I–" James began.

"_Dismissed_, Lieutanant."

James gave a nod and made his way out of Shepard's cabin on leaden legs. In a daze, he moved into the elevator, where he remained for several minutes, staring into space, after the doors had closed.

"Would you care to select a destination, Lieutenant?" EDI prompted.

"What? Oh, I, uh… Crew Deck," he mumbled.

Arriving on deck three, he stepped out of the elevator and stared at the door to Abby's quarters, a headache blooming inside his skull. Normally, when he needed to unwind or release some tension, he'd get drunk with Esteban, or seek Shepard out for a sparring session or workout.

They were his friends. And he'd let them down.

His stomach tightened as he continued to look at the lounge door. Abby was quickly becoming a friend as well, maybe more than that, considering her visit to the Med Bay. There was something about her, something that made him all too aware of her presence and made him want to protect her. He _could_ go and talk to her, knowing her gentle, refined voice and pretty smile would help put him at ease.

But he'd blown that as well, hadn't he? _Why_ had he kissed her?

At the time, it had felt like the most natural thing in the world and she'd kissed him back, right? But it'd been too soon, and when the doc had interrupted them... He sighed, running a hand through his buzz cut. Well, Abby had gotten out of there pretty damned fast, hadn't she?

Maybe he'd been wrong. Maybe it was just him and she hadn't kissed him back at all. Maybe he didn't know what the hell he was doing. Maybe she'd run because he'd screwed _that_ up, too.

He shook his head, his confidence shattered after the day's events. "Why the hell would a lady like _that _want me anyway?" he muttered under his breath.

Lingering in the corridor for a minute longer, he turned away from the lounge before heading for the crew quarters and the sanctuary of his bunk, hoping no one else would be there.

He needed to think.

_**IFS – Initial Flight Screening, a preliminary training school for military pilots.**_

_**NJP – Non-judicial punishment. Full explanation in chapter 7 footnotes.**_

_**UCMJ – Uniform Code of Military Justice, the foundation of military law in the United States. **_


	9. Lessons

**Lessons**

**Captain's Cabin**

"You okay?" Cortez asked Shepard after making them both a cup of coffee and sitting beside him.

Shepard took his cup, grunted and sat up straight on the couch, staring at his data pad for a moment before letting it fall to the side. "I spoke to James," he said quietly, taking a small sip of coffee.

"Yeah, so did I."

Shepard turned to Steve and watched him for a beat. "What did you say to him?"

"Just a few things he needed to hear." Cortez fell quiet and sipped at his own drink before sighing. "Doesn't mean I don't feel like a piece of crap, though."

"Yeah," Shepard agreed, and they said nothing further until they'd drained their cups. Steve silently took Shepard's cup from him and stood up, moving to the coffee pot and placing the cups down. He then returned to the couch but perched himself on the arm, leaving some space between them.

"How'd it go?" he asked Shepard. "If you're allowed to tell me, that is, and if you want to."

"I am and I do." Shepard patted the seat next to him, and Steve gave a faint smile before sitting down again, this time closer to Shepard.

"I know it couldn't have been easy for you," Steve observed. "Having to discipline someone is hard at the best of times, but when it's a friend…"

"I gave him a warning," said Shepard. "Procedure states that standard punishment for disobeying a lawful order is confinement and reduction of rank, but hell, James is too good a soldier to lose because of a stupid mistake. It's nothing to do with the fact he's my friend."

"I wasn't suggesting anything, you know that."

"I know." Shepard smiled and reached for one of Cortez's hands. "You know what I really wanted to do, Steve? I wanted to crack open a couple beers and tell him about some of the shit_ I_ pulled when I was Lieutenant Shepard. I don't know how I got away with most of it, but somehow I did."

Steve grinned, and Shepard shook his head ruefully. "You know, achieving N7 and being designated XO on the Normandy _made_ me," he went on. "I've never been a 'by the book' kind of guy, but for the first time I realized I needed to start setting an example to others – it wasn't about just me anymore. But with James I _had _to do things by the book. Me being 'one of the boys' wouldn't have helped him."

"You were doing your job," Steve reassured him. "He needed that wake-up call. And he's still _Lieutenant_ Vega. He must be feeling pretty lucky right about now. Let's hope he takes it to heart."

"I was thinking," Shepard began.

Steve frowned, placing a hand on Shepard's brow. "Want me to call Chakwas?"

Expecting a dirty look, Steve was delighted when Shepard laughed. "I walked into that one," he replied. "No, I was just remembering what a hothead I used to be. I had my own ideas about how missions should have been conducted, and didn't hesitate to let my COs know. I have absolutely no idea why Anderson wanted me as his XO. There were several other candidates, all with spotless records. I never disobeyed an order, though, and never got an 'official' reprimand, but I came close a couple of times. There were a few…'chats'."

"Maybe that's why Anderson wanted you," Steve guessed. "He could see your potential, or wanted someone who'd challenge him."

Shepard shrugged. "Maybe. Whatever the reason, he probably saved my career. I would have gotten in trouble eventually."

"What are you saying?" Steve asked. "You wanna recommend James for promotion?"

Shepard shook his head. "No. I need him to know he came _that _close to losing everything. Besides, he won't be up for promotion until…" He paused, choosing his next words carefully. "Did he tell you about…?"

"Being recommended for N7? Yeah. We're the only two people who know."

Shepard nodded. "I'm saying I want to give him a _taste_ of command again, to remind him of his responsibilities and duties to the mission and those under his command. Maybe it'll straighten him out. I know his last command went wrong despite his actions, and he lost a lot of confidence because of that. You know him better than I do, Steve. What do _you_ think? And put Cyone out of your mind when you answer. I know he's capable, but I need to know if he's _ready."_

Steve raised his eyebrows and blew out a breath. "He's certainly cocky, but that's not the same as confident. It's all a front. James and I talked about what happened with Captain Toni and his squad. He's accepted there was nothing he could have done to stop it, but it still eats away at him. I think he'd like the chance to put things right, you know? He can't bring those people back, but he _can _command a mission and have it be a success. I really think that's what he needs."

Shepard thought about that for a moment. "There's some Spectre business going down at the Citadel soon, and I wanted to take Kaidan with me instead of having him deputize for me here. I _could_ have James step in as acting XO. Should be an easy command for him if we're parked at the Citadel. It'd be a start, anyway. I just need to be careful I'm not sending out the wrong message – 'disobey an order, get acting XO'."

"No, I doubt he'd see it that way," said Steve, shaking his head. "I think he'd realize what you were trying to do. Beneath all the swagger, there's a pretty sharp brain in his head."

"Yeah, I know that." Shepard glanced at Steve. "You still mad at him?"

Steve fidgeted a little. "I'm trying not to be. But it's hard. When I think about what could have happened… I know," he said, holding up a hand when Shepard frowned. "I just need some time. We're friends and we'll get past it, but I swear, Adam, if he ever puts you in danger again…"

"I have a feeling he won't," Shepard declared confidently. "But rest assured, if he does, I'll kick his sorry ass from here to the Far Rim."

"I'd pay to see that," Steve chuckled.

"So it's decided, then," said Shepard, patting Steve's thigh. "Thanks for the advice. I should make you my full-time advisor."

"Am I gonna see anything for all these extra duties?"

"You're working for the Alliance, not Cerberus," Shepard stated with a raised eyebrow. "Wanna grab some dinner?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

Shepard nodded towards the door and both men stood up before leaving for the Mess.

**The following morning**

Abby stepped onto the elevator outside the crew quarters and quietly asked EDI for the hangar bay. It was very early, not quite 0600, but she'd hoped to find James awake.

She hadn't slept well; she'd had far too much on her mind for her to truly fall asleep. Everything about the Normandy was still such a wonder to her, its abilities and the beauty outside of its hull a constant revelation, but she had found its crew equally compelling.

Hence her long night.

She'd found it impossible to put James out of her mind since learning he may be facing discipline for his actions on Cyone. She agreed with the commander's reasons, knew as a leader of her own men that it had to be done, but that didn't lessen her worry over how James would had taken the news.

James was different from any other man she'd ever met, both in Ferelden and since her 'death'. He was a wonderful mixture of gentle and hard. An awkward description, she knew, but accurate nonetheless. He was a walking hulk of muscle, with power and strength in every movement, but also possessed a quick smile and a kindness and caring that shone in his eyes.

Two extremes, and their combination was something she was finding very hard to resist, even before he'd so boldly kissed her in the med bay.

She expected that James wouldn't take the 'talk' with his commander very well. Not because he'd believe Adam wasn't being fair, or was in the wrong, but because he'd disappointed the leader Abby knew he admired so much, and created a dangerous situation for those he cared about.

He was, in her humble estimation, a man determined to do what was right, but who wasn't experienced enough yet as a leader to realize his enthusiasm for the fight could still get the better of his sense. It was a hard lesson to learn, one only mastered through trial and error.

This was something she was very familiar with. She knew that the skill of battle came before the warrior gained the perspective needed to apply it correctly. She also knew learning that perspective was a wretched lesson.

It had taken her years of training to learn how to read her opponents, and that skill was something her father had demanded she perform without failure. One needed to understand what one's foe would do next; that was a critical component not only of surviving the fight, but of winning the battle as well. Would he swing high? Would he lunge?

Reading the enemy was vital.

Once she'd mastered this – many dozens of bruises and humiliating defeats later – her father had pushed her even further. He'd required that she and Fergus apply this learned sense of timing not only to themselves but to the men and women they may someday lead into battle: 'Don't just know what your own opponent will do; know what his _army_ will do as well'.

The elevator slowed and the doors opened, allowing her to step out into the massive bay. Her eyes immediately went to Lieutenant Cortez's station, which unsurprisingly was still empty, but as she moved into the main part of the bay, she didn't see James, either.

Wandering over to his work station, she frowned, thrown slightly that he wasn't where she'd hoped to find him. She looked at the workbench, stepping close and fingering a few of the complicated looking tools as she glanced around his work area. Her eyes were drawn to a small picture of James and an older man of similar looks tucked away on his desktop. She reached for it, smiling at the goofy grins shared by both men.

"Having fun, were you?" she whispered under her breath before putting the picture back in its place. She heard a grunt and looked up, not certain where the sound had come from. "Hello? James?"

There was a clatter of metal and she moved past the bench, spying a corridor in the stacked cartons, which she followed. "Hello?" she called again as she followed the path.

"Yeah! Back here!" answered James's familiar voice.

She reached the end of the carton maze and discovered James at its end, surrounded by what appeared to be a makeshift gym. "Hello," she said softly, a smile on her lips. She gestured around her. "This is rather cozy."

He didn't return her smile but nodded, the teasing light she'd grown to expect in his eyes not there. "Yeah. I'm not a big fan of working out with a crowd," he explained evenly. "You're up early," he finished, bending to pick up a dumbbell.

"You're right, I am," she answered, moving closer. "Though not any earlier than you."

"Is there something I can do for you?"

She paused, the tone of his question lacking its usual warmth. She decided to be direct. "No, not really. I just wanted to see you."

He grunted, counting off his reps under his breath, curling his arm rapidly.

"What does that one do for you?" she asked, pointing to the weight in his hand. "Is it hard? To do those?"

He finished his exercises and stood, replacing the weight in a rack. "Yeah, it is."

"Care to show me?"

He walked to her, an eyebrow arched. "Show you? Why?"

"Well, I haven't trained in ages, I wouldn't want to lose my strength," she replied with a shrug. "Besides, one never knows when a dragon might pop in."

He snorted, fighting a smile as he shook his head. "Abby, why are you here?" he asked slowly, finally holding her gaze.

"Because I want to be," she said sincerely, heartened that he'd finally begun to smile. "Now, are you going to show me how to do that exercise or not?"

He grinned, shrugging. "Yeah, I'll show you. Come on."

~o~O~o~

Liara was also up early, and had barely showered and dressed before Glyph was at her side, reeling off a long list of information the Broker terminal had received overnight.

Largely ignoring the drone, she sat at the terminal and began prioritizing her tasks for the day, when she noticed a winking light on her private terminal, situated to her right. "That's the search I left running overnight," she mumbled to herself.

"Yes, Dr. T'Soni," said Glyph, hovering close to her face. "The search has yielded seven positive matches."

"Seven?" she exclaimed, quickly standing and moving to the other terminal before switching it on. "What's the margin of error on the results?" she asked as she took a seat.

"Unknown, Dr. T'Soni. The accuracy of Lady Cousland's data is difficult to determine."

She nodded and looked at the screen thoughtfully. "Thank you, Glyph. Please continue to monitor the Broker terminal."

"At once." The drone drifted away from her and, as soon as the terminal booted up, Liara brought up the images her search had produced, along with Abby's corresponding drawings. She spent several minutes studying the search results before re-checking, not trusting her eyes.

"By the Goddess," she whispered, her eyes fixed on the first image. "I think we've found something."

She immediately stood up, ready to activate her omni-tool, when she remembered the early hour and decided that news like this would be better delivered in person.

"EDI, is Abby awake yet?"

"Affirmative."

Liara started walking quickly to the exit of her office. "Glyph, I'll be in Abby's quarters," she began before EDI spoke again.

"For your information, Liara, Abby is not in the Port Observation Lounge at the present time."

Liara halted at the door. "Where is she?"

"The shuttle bay."

"Is she with anyone?"

"She is conversing with Lieutenant Vega."

"Oh, I see." Liara walked back into her office, a hand over her mouth as she pondered whether she should interrupt them.

"Would it be helpful if I were to inform you when Abby vacates the shuttle bay?"

Liara sighed in relief. "That would be very helpful, EDI. In fact, would you ask her to come to my office?"

"Of course."

"Thank you," replied Liara, switching her private terminal off for the time being.

~o~O~o~

James directed Abby to recline on his weight bench and he stood over her, adjusting the position of her shoulders.

"Okay, don't move," he ordered, moving to his weights. He chose a small set and returned to her. "All right, now bend your elbows back toward the floor, just like I did. Then push straight up, but not too fast, got it?"

"Yes."

"All right, start with ten and then rest. Go."

She began the exercise as he'd directed, quietly counting with him. He leaned over her, gently touching her right elbow, adjusting her position, but otherwise didn't speak until she'd finished.

"Ten. Weights down, rest," he said, moving back to her. "That was pretty good."

"That was pretty _easy_," she argued, narrowing her eyes in mock annoyance. "I'm not a wimp, you know. Why are you taking it easy on me?"

He grinned. "'Cause you're a _girl_," he teased.

She sat up from the bench and crossed her arms. "You're ridiculous!" she laughed. "Come on, you aren't going to hurt me. I'm made of stern stuff, you know."

He chuckled, turning back to his weights. "That, I know," he replied, picking a larger weight. "So, how'd you train in Ferelden? I mean, here, we've got combat simulators, training squads, schools and stuff. How'd you learn to fight?" He held out the weight to her and she took it. "Just curl your arm like this," he instructed, watching her follow his directions. "Good."

"My father's captain of the guard gave my brother and me a broad education in weaponry and drilled us in various techniques. Once we'd shown a proficiency in a certain area, he selected the proper instructors in those skill sets and we trained in earnest."

"How old were you when that started? Like thirteen? Fourteen?"

"Six," she replied, continuing her exercises.

"Six?" he repeated, his eyebrows up in surprise. "You gotta be kiddin' me."

"No," she giggled, shaking her head. "Six is a very normal age to begin such training."

"Okay, then tell me what exactly they trained you in," he prodded. "Switch arms now," he directed, gesturing to the weight.

She did as he bid. "Fergus learned basic sword and shield, but eventually proved to be adept with weapons such as a maul or war axe. I was _awful_ with a shield, but I did very well with a weapon in each hand, so I learned to fight with both, one blade complementing the other. I'm also quite good with a bow."

"Two swords? Seriously? At six?"

"Yes, at six. Though I think I was eight or nine when I began training in two-handed techniques. Why are you so shocked by the age?"

"'Cause you were a kid! You shoulda been running around outside, you know? Pigtails and stuff."

She arched an eyebrow and stopped her exercise. "Pigtails?"

He grinned. "Sure. I bet you were pretty cute, too."

"Perhaps," she replied with a small smile. "Six is a very good age to start training. I was in line to inherit my father's title, at least, I was until Fergus married and had a child of his own. How could I have possibly led the people of Highever if I didn't know how to defend them?"

"I guess you've got a point," he admitted.

"Ferelden had been occupied for generations by a neighboring country," she continued. "My father and mother were part of the rebellion that freed us from it. War was a constant during their youth and obviously it proved a part of mine as well."

"So that's why you learned it all, huh? I guess that wound up being a good thing, considering you ended up saving everyone from those darkspawn."

She finished her reps and nodded, offering him back his weight. "Yes, I suppose it did."

He twisted the weight in his hand before sighing and moving to replace it in its stand. "Guess that's where you learned how to lead, too? That must have been helpful, having your dad be in charge of such a big place, so many people?"

"It helped," she agreed softly, watching him carefully. "I don't know that it made me any better at it. Leadership is something that's forged, something that's shaped through experience and error."

His back was to her, his eyes still on the equipment, but she saw his shoulders droop. "Seems like I've got the error part down pat," he said solemnly. "I screwed up big time the other day. I got too caught up in things and lost sight of the big picture."

"You're hardly the first," she replied. "I was guilty of that a few times myself."

"Yeah, but I'm guessing your mess ups didn't nearly get you or your commander killed."

She sighed, her eyes on his back. "My father was a genius at, well, everything, really," she began, sitting down on the weight bench. "He was a warrior of bravery and skill, an amazing diplomat – he could defuse almost every single situation he ever had to deal with. He was friend to two kings and at one point, the nobility of Ferelden even tried to make him one. He was aware of every single thing that went on in Highever, knew every family and could tell you how many heads of cattle were on our lands and how many bushels of grain we'd yield."

She paused as James slowly moved to face her, watching as he crossed his arms.

"Sounds like a good guy."

"He was. My mother was beautiful, kind, smart and could wield a sword like any man. My older brother was dashing and followed perfectly in my father's footsteps. I assure you, they were a _very_ tough act to follow."

"I can understand that."

"I thought you might," she replied kindly. "Anyway, in the span of a few hours my entire family was gone. There I was, absolutely numb from the pain of it and the next thing I knew, I was expected to end the Blight, the single greatest threat to Thedas."

"I'm sorry. I can't imagine how you got through that."

She shrugged lightly but he saw a heart-rending pain in her eyes as she moved to stand next to him.

"My point, James, is that despite having amazing examples before me, I had no bloody clue how to lead. I'd never been tested; I'd only ever had to give a few orders to my father's men. I didn't understand how to use people or their skills in fray, I had no idea how to rally or manage everyone. I made a complete mess of it; nearly the entire group took issue with me over something at some point."

"How'd you get through it? How'd you get better at it?"

"It took some time, but I finally learned to stop letting my heart get in my way when I was in battle."

"That's hard to do."

"It is, perhaps the hardest thing, actually. But I think it was the key," she said with a small shrug. "I learned to leave my fears, excitement, anger, _everything_, at camp. Then I could see what needed to be done, and not just for myself, but for those who were counting on me. I wasn't Abby – I was Warden Cousland, commander and leader against the Blight."

He studied her for a moment. "That helped?"

"It did. It was hard to learn to do, to leave _Abby_ behind, but it made it easier. _Warden Cousland_ could do what she had to and things got better," she explained, putting her hand on his forearm. "It gets easier, James. You learn from those kinds of things and Commander Shepard is a good mentor. Don't get lost in what happened. Take it for what it is and do _better_."

He sighed, looking down at her hand, which she hadn't moved. He shifted, catching it in his own and toying with her slender fingers, pleased that she didn't pull away. "You're right. I will."

"Good."

He smiled softly, her hand seeming to tingle in his. "So, that ah, that Warden Cousland sounds like a badass to me."

She grinned, squeezing his hand. "I expect Lieutenant Vega is as well."

"Maybe I should take _him_ along on missions and leave ol' James here for a while," he said. "He's kind of a screw-up."

She leaned close, her free hand catching his other. "I'm rather fond of him," she confessed softly.

He gently pulled her to him, so she was resting against him, as his heart skipped inside his chest. "Huh, really? Uh, why's that?"

"He's kind, he looks after me and he makes me feel safe. Plus, he's handsome and I can beat him at cards."

He blushed, looking aside as he held back a smile. "Handsome? Nah, he's covered in scars and tattoos."

"I like them," she whispered. "In fact, I like a lot about _James_."

His arms wound around her and she raised herself on her tiptoes, her eyes locked with his. "My turn," she breathed, kissing him lightly before stepping back. His arms dropped away from her waist and he looked dazed. "Thanks for the lesson," she said quietly before hurrying away.

He watched her go, his fingers on his lips, a grin spreading slowly across his face.

She'd given him a lot to think about, not just about how he could learn from his mistakes, but about _her_. "Thanks yourself," he replied as he ran a hand over his short hair.

Moving around his workout space, he cleaned up and locked the weights securely into place. Her advice was playing over and over in his mind and he realized she was right: he needed to learn to separate his emotions from his missions or he'd keep making dangerous choices.

The more he considered that, the more certain he was of what he needed to do.

He returned to his work bench and turned on his desktop, noticing the time. The day shift would be starting in a few more minutes and it was time to talk to both Shepard and Cortez. He needed to clear the air and make sure his commander knew James was taking what happened on Cyone seriously.

It was time to man up.


	10. Got Your Back

**Liara's office**

Liara slowly took a seat next to Abby, who was staring, slack-faced, at one of the terminals. "I… ran a search of artifacts bearing the designs you drew with your omni-tool," she said gently and deliberately. "This was almost an exact match." She paused and watched Abby intently. "You know what it is, don't you?"

Abby continued to look at the image of a dirty and battered kite shield, made of grey metal, which bore a flaming sword on its exterior. She nodded, unable to speak as she felt as though her throat would close up if she did.

Liara rose, returning a minute later with a small tumbler of water, which she passed to Abby. After drinking it, Abby gave her a thin smile and cleared her throat. "I do. It's a Templar shield," she murmured, her eyes wide as they once again moved to the screen.

"Templar?" Liara repeated with a slight frown. "I recall you mentioning… weren't the Templars something to do with the mages?"

"Yes, they protected the mages and people of Thedas from abominations."

"Abominations? What are they?"

"A mage who'd become possessed by a demon was called an abomination," Abby explained with a sigh, as though speaking was an effort. "I saw a few during the Blight. They were truly horrific."

"You had said the Templars kept the mages away from society."

"Yes, and that's why," Abby replied. "But the Templars were also something of an army for the Chantry. The entire Order was rather controversial for many reasons. Where was this found?"

"At a remote location. Abby, do you know if the Templars existed on other planets besides your own?"

Abby finally looked away from the screen, her eyes meeting Liara's. "Until I came here, I had no idea there was anything more than Thedas, the moon and the stars."

"Of course. I am sorry." Liara laid a hand on Abby's back and the two women shared a few moments of heavy silence. She drew away from Abby, still watching her, and activated her omni-tool, entering a command.

"Shepard here."

"Shepard, I need to see you in my office," said the asari scientist.

"Can this wait a bit, Liara? I'm kinda busy. Got a lot to catch up on."

"I appreciate that, but you told me you wanted to be informed if I discovered something pertaining to Abby's home."

"And have you?"

"Maybe. Abby has identified a shield belonging to the Templars, who were an order of warriors–"

"I remember. Where was it found?"

"On an asteroid in the Tikkun system."

"Tikkun? Are you sure?" he asked sharply.

"Quite sure. It was recovered by one of the mercenary gangs that go trophy hunting near the Perseus Veil. An anonymous businessman bought it for 143,000 credits last year. Its age has been verified as close to 2,500 years old."

A quiet huff was heard, followed by a brief silence. "Is Abby okay?"

"She's, well…" Liara glanced at Abby, who had returned her attention to the screen. "I don't quite know what to say."

"Give me ten minutes. Shepard out."

The glow of Liara's omni-tool waned, and she moved closer to Abby, wishing she knew what to say to her new friend. When dealing with cold, hard facts, she was at her most confident, but when faced with an emotionally charged situation – which she had the potential to exacerbate – she struggled. "Abby, that was not the only artifact found on the asteroid."

Abby's head snapped around.

"Would you like to see the others?"

"Yes," Abby answered immediately, lurching forward in her chair. "_Please_, Liara."

When Shepard walked in – seven minutes later – Liara was quietly pacing behind Abby. Shepard coughed quietly to announce his presence and Liara looked up, quickly glanced at Abby, and shook her head before looking back at Shepard.

He walked forward, stopping a short distance from Abby, and looked at the screen. On it was a large, battered piece of metal, the faded image of a griffon emblazoned across it.

"What's that?" he asked.

"Abby has told me that it bears the emblem of the Grey Warden order," Liara informed him. "At our best guess, it is part of a chest plate, or cuirass."

Shepard squatted next to Abby and looked up at her, unable to see her face properly as it was obscured by her fringe. "You're a Grey Warden," he stated, not knowing what else to say.

"Yes," she answered, something odd in her voice. "I _was."_

Shepard nodded towards the door and, understanding, Liara departed, leaving the two of them alone. Shepard stood up and took a seat in Liara's chair.

"I won't even pretend to imagine how you're feeling," he began, "but this is a start. We're here for you, Abby. We're your friends, and together, we'll figure this out. I promise."

"I can't… I don't know," she whispered. "This has all suddenly become very real, hasn't it? It's no longer speculation – I really _am _a thousand years old. The place I believed to be the Golden City really _is _a ship that flies through the stars. Everything I ever knew, my family, friends, everything I ever held to be 'normal' is gone. Does the Golden City even exist? Did it _ever _exist?" she asked him, fear and heartbreak in her eyes.

"I don't know," he said sadly. "I'm sorry."

"This-this place where those things were found," she stammered, "is it far away from here? Do you think…?"

He hesitated momentarily, but knew there was no way to sugar-coat his answer. "We can't go to that region of space at the present time," he sighed. "It's too dangerous."

"Why?" she asked, her voice wavering. "What makes it so?"

"The area's very unstable right now and I'm not authorised to take the Normandy there," he explained as gently as he could. "It may be that we'll be ordered there eventually, but… no. I can't promise you that. All we can offer you for now is our friendship and support. I wish we could do more. I'm sorry."

She nodded, and Shepard noticed that her hands were tightly meshed together atop the console. "I'm not ungrateful," she uttered before shaking her head. "I just… I feel so alone all of a sudden. So small."

"I _do _know how that feels," he said, covering her hands with one of his. "And you're _not_ alone."

"Thank you," she replied blankly, her eyes returning to the screen.

Shepard sighed, wishing he could give Abby more time. "Will you be okay here for a minute? I need to speak with Liara, and then I'll send her back in to you."

"Of course."

He released her hands and stood up before laying a hand on her shoulder and squeezing it. "Are you going to be all right?"

"Yes, of course I will," she answered without looking up. "Please, don't let me keep you."

Feeling helpless, he nodded and left the office, finding Liara in the Mess. He gestured to a table and they sat down together. "Tell me about this asteroid."

Using her omni-tool, she brought up an image of the Tikkun system which comprised a sun, four planets and an asteroid belt, which she zoomed in on. "Here and here," she said, pointing out two large bodies within the asteroid belt. "The smaller of the two is Etiel, where the artifacts were found. Its larger twin, Uriyah, is considered a dwarf planet in its own right. It is believed that Etiel broke away from Uriyah at some point, and that the two once formed a larger planet."

Shepard clasped his chin, a frown forming as he considered her words. "You said that the shield found on… Etiel? Was close to 2,500 years old. Chakwas speculated that Abby is more than a thousand years old, but it'd take longer than that for a planet to disintegrate, wouldn't it? I don't know, though. I'm not the scientist here."

She studied his face before mirroring his posture and resting her chin on her hand. "Under normal circumstances it would take much longer than a thousand years for an asteroid belt to be formed, but until we're able to land on Uriyah or Etiel, we are not in possession of all known facts."

Shepard glanced at the door to Liara's office and beckoned Liara closer, speaking quietly. "The age of that shield – if genuine – might indicate that Abby's much older than Chakwas originally estimated."

"It might, indeed," Liara agreed.

Shepard sat up straight, keeping one eye on Liara's office. "What else do we know?"

"Very little else is known, other than Eclipse is very interested in the system, and its members make frequent trips there."

Shepard shook his head. "That system's one of the reasons the quarians and geth have been at war for centuries. I'll bet not many of those mercs return."

"Correct. The ones who do return, though, often bring back spoils which are sold on the black market for vast sums of money. There is something else, Shepard," she said, using her omni-tool to zoom out, showing the entire system. "The usual warning buoys are there, but there are others, warning of an unspecified biological hazard. They are posted around Uriyah."

"Only it's in geth space, and we can't get to it," he said sourly. "Or is it quarian space? Who knows? Nobody knows where the Migrant Fleet is or what they're up to."

"I'll see what I can dig up," she said, shutting the image down and standing up.

Shepard also rose. "Thanks. Listen. We're headed for the Citadel and I won't be around for much of today. I need to see the Council, I have Spectre business to take care of…"

"I'll keep an eye on her," she assured him.

He patted her arm. "I appreciate it, Liara. While I'm there, I'll pay Aria a visit, see if she can shed any light on what Eclipse is up to, and whether or not they've been adding a couple thousand years to the age of their spoils."

"That would certainly increase their value," said Liara thoughtfully.

"And whether any of them have gotten sick since their return," Shepard resumed. "I'd like to know more about this biological hazard."

"That would be very helpful," she replied, glancing back at her office door. "I should return to Abby. She is in need of company."

He nodded. "Please tell her we're doing what we can. I want to help her, but I can't give her the emotional support she needs right now. I have to stay focused on the war."

"Well, I _can_," said Liara. "Do what you have to, Shepard. Abby's made a lot of friends and we'll be here for her when you can't be."

He leaned down, kissing Liara on the cheek, before leaving the Mess.

~o~O~o~

Shepard stepped out of the elevator and into the Shuttle Bay, pausing for a minute to listen. He was accustomed to walking in on laughter, bickering matches or heated debates, and found the utter silence that greeted him a little disconcerting. "EDI? Are Vega and Cortez down here?"

"Affirmative. Both are present."

"Thanks." He frowned and walked in, not seeing Steve in his usual place. He found James at his work bench, engrossed in some precision filing of a weapon part. Not wanting to distract him, Shepard waited until James stopped to change the implement on the end of his omni-tool. "Lieutenant?"

James jumped a little before straightening up. "Commander. Didn't hear you come in." He gave a quick, unnecessary salute, which Shepard returned. "So, uh… everything okay, sir?"

"Major Alenko and I will be conducting some business on the Citadel today. We'll be arriving in about an hour. While we're gone, you're acting XO. You up to that?"

James's mouth worked for a few seconds before he nodded. "You bet," he said seriously.

"EDI, change Lieutenant Vega's security clearance to level two until further notice."

"Understood," replied the AI.

Shepard nodded, looking around the hangar.

"He's down there, sir," Vega said, pointing to the far end of the bay. "If that's who you're looking for. He's working on the reserve Kodiak, wants to take it out for a spin to stir the engines. Maybe he could take you and the major to the Presidium in it? Uh… not that I'm telling you what to do."

Shepard sighed inwardly, recognising that Vega was still nervous after their talk in his cabin. "Maybe he could," he replied. "Come see me in the CIC in half an hour, I'll brief you."

"Will do," James said, watching as Shepard walked away and towards the Kodiak. Then, realising that he could catch the two of them together, he began to follow.

Shepard was explaining to Cortez that he wouldn't be available for lunch when James arrived next to them, standing a little way back. Steve paused and looked at Vega briefly. "What's up?"

"I wanna clear the air," James declared. "It's like a freakin' graveyard in here and I'm sick of it. And no, I'm not blaming you, Esteban. This is all on me." He sighed, shaking his head. "_Steve."_

"I'll leave you to it," said Shepard, but James stepped forward, holding up a hand.

"If it's okay, sir, I'd like you to stay. I wanna talk to both of you."

"All right," Shepard agreed, folding his arms. "Go ahead."

James blew out a sigh and put his hands in his pockets. "I guess I wanted to say sorry to both of you. You could have thrown the book at me, sir, but you didn't, and I appreciate that. I know I screwed up and I want you to know that nothing like that'll ever happen again."

"Words are easy, James," Shepard pointed out. "You need to back them up with actions."

"Sure. I know that," he nodded. "But words can also mean a lot, and what you said to me had a real impact." He met Shepard's eyes and straightened up. "The worst thing wasn't when you said I might be demoted or whatever, sir. It was when you said you were _disappointed_ in me. I _never _wanna hear you say that twice. I won't let you down again, I promise you that."

"Don't let _yourself_ down," Shepard replied. "You're a damned good soldier."

"Thank you, sir." He looked at Cortez. "Esteban," he said softly, and sighed. "… Steve. I'm sorry I let you down as well, buddy. I missed you, man. Hell, I been talking to myself all day. It sucks. I _would_ say it sucks balls, but I'm guessing you'd have something suggestive to say about that. Well, you used to, anyway."

Steve looked at James and shrugged.

James removed his hands from his pockets and shook his arms out. "Okay. That was all I wanted to say. I'll leave you guys to chat. I'll see you in the CIC, sir. Catch you later, Steve."

He turned his back on them and headed for his work station.

"That was a brave thing he just did," Shepard said quietly to Cortez, hoping to encourage the friends to reconcile.

Steve groaned and ran a hand over his hair. "Hey, James," he called out. "That's _Esteban _to you."

Feeling a warm glow in his belly, Vega slowly turned around. "Yeah?"

Shepard slapped Steve on the back and walked past James. "Half an hour."

"I'll be there, sir."

The lieutenants waited until Shepard had gone before James shuffled a little closer to Steve, again pushing his hands into his pockets. "So… I heard Shepard blew you off for lunch."

"That's an interesting choice of words, James," Steve said with a straight face.

"Ha! Yeah, it is… I was wondering if you wanted to do something when we get to the Citadel? Maybe grab a bite to eat? If you want, that is."

"Sure," Cortez answered.

James gave an exaggerated nod. "Great. I was thinking of maybe asking Abby to come along, just so no one thinks you and I are on a date."

"I don't have a problem with people thinking we're on a date," Steve said, his expression unreadable. "We _do _have a lot of making up to do, Mr. Vega," he purred with a slow wink.

"Screw you, man!" James huffed before hurriedly walking away, Steve's soft laughter following him. By the time he reached his work station, he was grinning from ear to ear.

Everything was back to normal.

~o~O~o~

After determining, with EDI's help, that Abby had returned to her quarters, James paid her a visit, entering the lounge when the doors opened. She was standing by the large window, looking out at the stars as the Normandy headed for the Citadel.

"How's it goin', Abby?" he asked cheerfully.

"It's so vast out there, isn't it?" she replied quietly without turning around.

He moved to her side and looked out. "Sure is," he agreed with a surreptitious glance at her. "You feeling all right?"

She turned to him, giving a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "You look happy."

He shrugged. "I talked to Shepard and Esteban. Got things squared with 'em."

"That's wonderful, James," she said, turning back to the window.

"It's thanks to you," he said softly. "You made me see things from their perspective. Guess I needed a little reminder that Jimmy Vega's not the only person who counts."

She lightly shook her head. "You do yourself a disservice. You're not that person at all."

He felt something warm flourish in his belly and longed to clasp her shoulders and kiss her again, but something in her voice stopped him. "What's wrong?" he asked.

She turned back to him, her eyes fixed on his chest, and didn't reply.

"Hey." He nudged her chin with his thumb, and she looked up at him.

"Liara believes she's found my home," she said dully before averting her eyes.

"Oh… shouldn't that be a good thing? You don't seem too happy."

She shook her head. "There's nothing left of it," she whispered. "It's just a ruined rock hurtling through space."

"But it can't be," he mumbled, his stomach clenching. "Where is it? We can take you there, right?"

"I don't remember where it was. Commander Shepard said we can't go there at the moment."

"EDI, where's Abby's home planet?" James asked, his brows meeting. "Why can't we go there?"

"It is not a planet, Lieutenant, but the remains of one. It is situated in the Tikkun system."

James thought for a moment. "Isn't that in geth space?"

"Tenure of the region is currently in dispute. At the present time, Alliance ships are ordered not to venture closer than 500,000 kilometres from the Perseus Veil."

"Ah, shit," he cursed, placing his hands on his hips. "Damn politics!"

He looked down, feeling a small hand rest against his arm. "Don't distress yourself, James. I'm grateful beyond words that Adam, Liara," she moved to stand in front of him, "and you have done so much already."

"I haven't really done much," he protested. "Liara's the clever one. And if Shepard can't think of a way around something, he'll punch his way through it," he chuckled.

She smiled, then, and he felt the same warmth spread through his core. "You've been my friend, James," she said. "And…"

"And?" he gently coaxed.

She hung her head and shrugged one shoulder.

"I'm good with 'and'," he joked, and she stepped closer to him, her head still down. "Come on," he uttered quietly, pulling her against his chest, his strong arms winding around her. "Hey, sorry for cursing earlier."

"When did you do that?" she mumbled against his chest.

"Y'know, when I mentioned politics. I said a certain word I probably shouldn't have."

"Do you mean 'shit'?"

He sprang away from her, holding her at arms' length. "You did _not _just say that," he laughed. "You did not–!"

"I'm afraid I did." She smiled weakly before her arms fell limply at her sides, and she sighed. "My father would have had kittens if he'd heard me speak like that. How I wish I could hear his voice again."

"I know." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and, together, they watched the stars for a little while longer. "I gotta go in a minute, Abby," he said apologetically. "Shepard's got some business to take care of, and he's left me as acting XO. That means executive officer."

"Well done, James," she said genuinely, giving him a fond smile. "I'm really pleased for you."

He nodded, forcing himself to look away from her lips while unconsciously licking his own. "You know, Esteban and I are headin' down to grab some lunch when we reach the Citadel. Wanna come with?"

"Are you allowed to leave the ship if you're in charge?"

"Oh, yeah. Shepard does it all the time. I just need to be reachable by omni-tool. I'll be on standby, that's all."

She sighed. "It's very kind of you to ask, but I fear I wouldn't be the best company. What I really feel like doing is hitting something."

"Now _that _can be arranged. I just had an idea."

She looked up at him, confused.

"I've been meaning to teach you the omni-bow, right?" he asked. "Well, how about a crash course? I promise it'll be fun."

"I don't know what I'm letting myself in for, but all right," she agreed.

"That's my girl," he replied. "I mean… ahah… gimme an hour and come down to the shuttle bay? I got a suit of tech armor just for you."

"Tech armor? What's that?"

"It'll protect you and light you up like a Christmas tree," he grinned. "But don't worry. You won't look as fruity as Esteban. _Nobody _does."

"Christmas tree? I'm sure I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about," she replied with warmth in her voice, "but it does sound like fun."

"Be there or be square, baby," he quipped, pointing at her before moving towards the door. "Wear something practical. Flat shoes and pants. Um… I guess you call 'em trousers."

"James?"

"Yeah?"

She walked up to him, positioning herself in front of him. "Thank you," she said, standing on tiptoes and kissing him quickly on the lips.

"What for?"

"For being you."

He cringed, moving a hand to rub the side of his face. "Now look what you made me do," he said, pointing to his cheeks, which were rapidly turning scarlet.

She looked up through her lashes, her eyes wide. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, like _that _was genuine," he laughed before sighing. "I really gotta go. You gonna be okay?"

She nodded, raising a hand to caress his cheek. "I am now. You have that effect on me, James. You make everything better."

"Yeah, uh, so do you," he stammered, glancing at the door. "I'll see you in the, ah… y'know. Shuttle Bay."

"I look forward to it," she replied.

He walked to the door and waved to her. "Later."

"Later," she said with a smile as he exited, the doors closing.

"Ah, hell," he muttered once outside, feeling his flushed cheeks and shaking his head. He headed to the restroom to splash some water on his face before hurrying to the elevator.

~o~O~o~

When James arrived in the CIC, he was informed by Traynor that Shepard was in the cockpit. James made his way there, finding the commander talking to Joker and EDI.

"What's wrong with your face?" Shepard asked James as he turned around. "You been running?"

"Or…" Joker began before shaking his head. "Nah, I'm not touching that one. Too easy. I've got _some _self-respect."

"I'm _fine_," James said with a hard look at Joker.

"Nice to see you wearing all of your uniform for once," Shepard commented.

"The shirt's a little snug around the shoulders," he complained, fidgeting slightly.

"Yep," Joker and Shepard replied together.

"Okay, James," Shepard began. "You've got yourself an easy watch."

Joker snorted loudly. "Oh, you _really_ wanna go there? Remember the last time you said that?" He sat up straight and deepened his voice to imitate Shepard's. "'Kick back a little, Joker. We'll be back soon. Make the most of the quiet time.' Yeah, _real _quiet," he added, reverting to his own voice.

"Joker…"

"Remember what happened next?" the pilot demanded. "We were _boarded by Collectors. _You know, just in case your memory's a little fuzzy? _Boarded by Collectors_ while the commander takes his senior staff on a pleasant little trip in the shuttle! Joker saves the day–"

"I believe_ we _saved the day, Jeff," EDI corrected.

"Details, EDI. Details," Joker sniffed. "The point is, we risked life and limb and when the commander's party arrived back,_ I _got the lecture –_ I_, not _we_ – from the Cerberus ice queen about letting the Collectors get their claws on _her _ship? You know something? I haven't mutinied. Not once. And I'm _still _waiting for my medal."

Shepard, Vega and EDI all watched Joker for a minute in silence.

"You done?" Shepard asked.

"Yeah, I think I got a few things off my chest. Thanks."

Shepard thumbed over his shoulder, and James followed him to the CIC, where they stopped. "As I was saying, there's nothing for you to deal with right now. Traynor will inform you if any emails arrive."

"You want me to read your emails?" James asked. "What if it's something personal?"

"My personal emails are in a separate folder. You won't have access to them," replied Shepard, and James nodded.

Shepard led them to his private terminal next to the galaxy map. "Traynor might inform you that Admiral Hackett's available to speak in the War Room. That doesn't mean you _have_ to speak to him. Hackett's a busy man and he makes himself available a couple of times a day in case we have anything to report. If there's nothing, there's no need to talk to him, so just let Traynor know. If, however, Admiral Anderson calls in, I want you to speak with him. Sometimes he just wants to chat. Remember, he's on Earth. Keep his spirits up if you can. Tell him some crappy jokes, anything."

James nodded. "I can do that."

"Other than that, I'd recommend visiting the Citadel while you can. Same goes for you, Traynor," he said to the specialist. "Ensign Deakin can cover for you. It'll be good experience for him."

"I might just do that, Commander," she replied brightly. "Thanks."

"I was thinking of taking Abby and Esteban to the combat simulator," James told Shepard. "When he's done dropping you off, that is."

Shepard folded his arms, an eyebrow rising. "You planning on having Steve along as third wheel, James?"

James gawked, his eyes almost bulging out of his head. "What? No! No, I wasn't… I just wanted to do something with my friends, you know? And maybe it'll take Abby's mind off of things."

"Relax," Shepard said with a knowing smile, and James groaned, realising Shepard had been pulling his leg. "Abby told you, then, about what Liara found?" the commander asked.

"Yeah," James answered quietly. "Sure wish the quarians and geth'd get their acts together."

Shepard nodded. "I know. That's something I'll be speaking to Hackett about. We need the quarians for the war, if they're not too busy throwing themselves at the geth. If we can locate the Migrant Fleet, I may be able to enter into talks with its admiralty. I'll keep you posted."

"Appreciate it, sir."

"That's 'need to know', Lieutenant. No point giving anyone false hope."

"Absolutely. I won't say anything to Abby."

"Good. Well, that's about it," Shepard said. "Any questions?"

"I'll probably have a bunch once you're gone, sir, but nothin' right now."

"You're acting XO," Shepard encouraged. "This is _your_ ship until we return. Anything comes up, like a distress call, get the Normandy outta here and take care of it. You only need to contact me if we receive orders from Hackett. Traynor or Deakin will inform you if that happens. If you're unsure of anything, EDI, Joker and Garrus are at your disposal, but I think you'll be fine." He activated his omni-tool. "You ready, Kaidan?"

"I'm in the hangar, Shepard."

"Be right there." Shepard deactivated the omni-tool and nodded at James before moving to the elevator.

"Sir?" James asked, walking alongside Shepard. "I just wanted to thank you for this," he said quietly. "It means a lot that you've given me a second chance."

"You're ready for it, James. Check in on everyone before you head for the Strip."

"Yes, sir." James saluted, and Shepard reciprocated before shaking James's hand and boarding the elevator.

~o~O~o~

Once James was satisfied everything was well on the Normandy and after changing into his armor, he and Abby met Cortez on the Sunset Strip after Steve had transported the two Spectres to the Presidium. They grabbed a quick drink and snack before heading for the combat simulator.

"How you finding the Strip the second time around, Abby?" Cortez asked her as she looked up at the bright lights and sky cars.

"It's not nearly as huge or terrifying as it seemed the last time," she replied with a smile. "Perhaps it's the two strong and handsome friends on either side of me."

"Well, that's never a bad thing to have, is it?" replied the pilot as James walked ahead to get a place in the queue. Cortez leaned closer to Abby and dropped his voice to a whisper. "You _do _realise that James has gone into 'Papa Bear' mode?"

"Has he?"

Cortez nodded. "He's trying to cheer you up and now he's wondering if this was a good idea after all, not to mention he's worried you'll get hurt in the sim."

"He's worried about me?" she asked quietly, a small smile on her lips.

Steve grinned. "Of course he is. Do me a favor, go easy on him in there, okay? He seems to have forgotten you killed a _dragon_."

"I'm sure James is a very capable fighter," she replied, doing her best not to laugh as she looked straight ahead.

"Oh, he is. He's also in for a hell of a surprise. So I expect."

They shared a smile and entered the simulator, James waving them ahead while he booked an arena. Steve led Abby down to the locker room, where they sat on a bench. He then produced two small boxes he'd been carrying, passing one to Abby.

"This is your tech armor," he informed her, opening his box, and Abby did the same. He then removed eight small black pads from the box and held them in his palm. "Take one of these and stick it on the nape of your neck."

She watched in amusement as Steve attached the pad to his neck and did the same with her own pad. "How does it adhere?" she asked.

"This set is designed for humans. Our body heat helps it stick," he explained. "Now place one on each shoulder, one just above each knee, one on your abdomen and the other on your back. Here, let me help you with that."

Once the pads had been attached, Steve invited Abby to stand up. "Now I'll demonstrate how tech armor works. Hit me."

She blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Hit me. Go on, take your best shot."

"Hit you? How hard?"

"As hard as you like. I promise you I won't be hurt," he chuckled. "Come on. We're in a fight simulator. There's no room for friendship here," he said with unconvincing severity.

"Oh, really?" she asked, laughing. "I just…?" She made a fist, aiming it at his abdomen.

"Yep. Right there." He straightened up, bracing himself. "Come on, Abby! You're not chicken, are you?"

Her eyebrows rose. "Chicken? All right, you asked for it…" She drew her arm back and slammed her fist against Cortez's abdomen. Instantly, his torso and her hand were enveloped by a glowing translucent barrier, and they both staggered back as the barriers collided, Steve grabbing her arm to steady her.

"What was that?" she exclaimed breathlessly.

"That was tech armor!" he answered before backing away from her. "I asked you to hit me, not to punch me through the wall!" He folded his arms, nodding. "I see your game, Cousland. Dirty fighting, that's your style."

"No it isn't!" she protested through her laughter, and Steve grinned, pleased to see her relax.

"Which is your shield arm?" he asked her.

"Oh, I don't use a shield," she replied, examining her hands.

"Now you do," he muttered quietly. "You're right-handed?"

She nodded, raising her left hand, and Steve attached the eighth pad to her wrist. "Let's keep this one in reserve for James," he whispered. "Just raise your arm to shield yourself, and the tech'll do the rest."

"Just for James?"

"Just for James. He's coming. Let's keep this to ourselves, okay? Be a nice surprise for him."

She nodded and smiled at James as he approached.

"Okay, I've set us up in a practice arena," Vega informed them. "There'll be targets in there so you can practice with your omni-bow, Abby. We can set up some combatants, but only if you feel ready," he said seriously. "Let's see how it goes." He activated his omni-tool and Abby's also glowed. "I'm uploadin' the omni-bow suite," he informed her. "There. You got your tech armor on?"

"Yes, Steve assisted me with that."

James moved behind Abby, looked at her neck and then glanced at Steve. "You sure you put it on right, Cortez?"

"Whatever," Steve mumbled, walking away from them.

"What?" James demanded.

"I'm 'Cortez' all of a sudden, Papa Bear?" Steve called over his shoulder, and James looked at Abby, shrugging his shoulders. She shrugged back, her face a picture of innocence.

They collected their weapons and entered the small arena, where James familiarized Abby with the layout and targets before explaining how to use the omni-bow.

"This is more like a crossbow," she said as the glowing weapon appeared in her hand. "Where are the bolts?"

James moved to stand behind her, and Cortez sat on a small platform to get out of their way. "Just point it like this," James said, guiding Abby's hands, and she took aim at a distant target. "That's it," he went on, moving slightly closer to Abby, his chest plate touching her back. "Now just pull back and let it fly."

She did as instructed, and a glowing bolt appeared, which embedded itself just below the bulls-eye on the target.

"Nice going, Abby!" Steve called.

"Thank you!" she replied, a smile of satisfaction pulling at her lips.

"Okay," James began quietly, positioning himself slightly to Abby's side and bringing his arms around her. "Just aim a little higher. Turn your hand to the side like this." He rested his right hand on hers, turning it a little, and moved his head next to her ear. "Try it now," he said softly.

Cortez rolled his eyes.

She let loose another bolt, which hit the bulls-eye. "Yes! Nice!" James exclaimed with pride. "Let's not hurry off though, okay? Let's try it a few more times."

"I _think_ she's got it, James," Steve commented dryly, and James stepped back from Abby as though he'd been stuck with a pin.

"Forget I was here?" Steve mumbled.

"Shut the hell up, man," James began before he stumbled forward, temporarily knocked off-balance. "What the-?" He glanced over his shoulder and then at his armored bottom. He slowly looked up, just in time to see a cackling Abby disappear behind cover. "Did… did you just shoot my_ ass_?" he shrieked.

Laughing, Cortez hopped off the platform and loaded a practice thermal clip into his pistol. "It's on, Mr. Vega," he challenged.

"What? What's goin' on?" asked James as Steve also took cover.

"I'd advise you to defend yourself, James," Abby called from her hiding place.

"You'd do well to listen to her, man!" added Cortez. "She's a dirty fighter, that Cousland chick!"

"I am _not!"_ she protested, an omni-bolt glancing off Steve's cover.

James quickly shook his head before ducking behind cover and slowly moving in Abby's direction, grinning when he spotted her bottom protruding from behind a platform. "Shoot _my _ass, huh?" he muttered, taking aim with his rifle.

From nowhere, a huge glowing shield appeared at Abby's side, James's shot bouncing off it. He leapt up, his face reddening in indignation. "Esteban, you goddamn cheat! You didn't say nothin' about shields!"

"Sure I did," Steve answered, taking a shot which hit James's shoulder plate, and Vega immediately ducked. "I told Abby all about it."

"All right, you two wanna play it like that?" James reloaded his rifle and hid himself from view, sidling closer to Abby's last location. Upon reaching it, he surged around a corner, taking aim at thin air. "Gotcha! I… Huh? Where'd she go?"

Cortez peered over his cover, not seeing her anywhere. "Abby?" he called, standing up. "Where are you?" He gasped, then, and the tech armor around his bottom lit up as an omni-bolt made contact.

"Always check your rear guard, Steve," she said, appearing behind him.

"All riiiight!" James hollered, punching the air.

"How the hell did you get over here?" Cortez asked in dismay, protectively clutching his right buttock.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out," she teased, tilting her head and looking at his butt in concern.

"That's it, you're going _down_, Cousland," Steve threatened, giving chase as she ran off.

"Damn right she is!" Vega agreed.

"I may be ancient, but I'm faster than the two of you!" she laughed, darting back behind cover.

"Not this time, sister!" Steve called out as he tried to ascertain where she'd gone. "A man's ass is his castle! You do _not _go there!"

"Wait, what?" Vega sputtered. "A man's ass is…? Huh, maybe yours is… or _Shepard's!"_ he taunted, cupping a hand to his mouth.

Steve stopped and slowly turned in the direction of Vega's voice. "Abby?" he asked quietly.

"Yes, Steve?" she replied around a snigger.

"Need a hand with this _zopenco_?"

She emerged from the shadow cast behind her cover and beckoned Steve to her. He sprinted to her side, crouching low. "Just cover your own ass, Mr. Vega!" he yelled. "Now we're _both_ gunnin' for you!"

"Traitor!" James accused, ducking as an omni-bolt whistled over his head. "Damn it!"

By the end of the session, James had been very soundly trounced by both conspirators. Abby joined him where he sat, bewildered, on the floor, while Steve took a walk around the perimeter of the arena.

"You let us win," she said to James.

"No, ma'am, I didn't," he answered, shaking his head.

"How's your bottom?" she enquired with a cheeky smile.

"My ass is fine, but I'm gonna need to beat a few dents outta my armor. Hey, I mighta cursed a few times back there. Sorry about that. I'm tryin' to be good."

"Why?" she asked. "I'm not a princess, as I believe I've proven well enough today. Besides, I don't want you to be someone you're not. I like you as you are, James."

He glanced at her, wearing a gentle smile. "Really?"

She reached for an armored hand and squeezed it. "Really."

"Okay, I'm gonna head back," announced Cortez, who'd heard their conversation. "Think I'm done being a third wheel."

"Hey!" James began to protest as Steve walked past them.

"Enjoy yourselves," Cortez said, smiling. "Just don't get killing each other in here. I wouldn't wanna be the one to explain it to Shepard. Later, Abby. Thanks for the match."

"Later," she said with a wave. "Thanks for cheering me up. Both of you." Steve winked at her, and she and James watched as he departed the arena.

As the doors closed, James huffed, suddenly unsure of himself. "You wanna go again?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "I'd like to stay right here."

"And do what?"

She met his eyes and shuffled a little closer. "I'll leave that up to you, James."

His stomach flipped over as Abby's eyes moved to his mouth, and he leaned in, their lips almost touching when his omni-tool pinged.

"Son of a bitch!" he cursed, quickly looking at Abby.

"Quite so," she agreed with a shaky sigh.

"Just gimme a second and I'll take care of this," he promised. "Hey, Normandy. Vega here."

"Sir, it's Ensign Deakin. We've been ordered to Eden Prime in the Utopia system."

James frowned and scrambled to his feet, holding a hand out to Abby. "Eden Prime? What for?"

"Unknown, sir. Details are to follow en route."

He pulled Abby up, making sure she was all right before answering. "Is it from Hackett?"

"It's from Alliance Command. There are no further details at the present time."

"Okay, thanks, man. I'll be right there. Vega out." He led Abby out of the arena and activated his omni-tool. "I'd better tell Shepard about this. I'm sorry, Abby, but we need to head back."

After a moment, a small screen appeared above Vega's omni-tool. "Yes, James?" asked Shepard. "Everything okay?"

"Commander, sorry to bother you, but we've been ordered to Eden Prime."

Shepard frowned. "Details?"

"Negative, sir. Details to follow en route. Sounds kinda mysterious."

"All right. Recall everyone to the Normandy and have Joker set a course. I'll be back before the pre-flight checks are through. Kaidan can stay here and conclude our business. We'll pick him up when we're done."

"You got it, sir."

"Well done, James. Shepard out."

_***Zopenco – Spanish for idiot, half-wit**_


	11. A Shared Burden

**A Shared Burden**

James was waiting outside the CIC when Commander Shepard rounded the corner of the airlock and James immediately stepped forward to greet him, a data pad in hand.

"Sir," James began, matching the commander's steps as they moved toward the War Room where Shepard would be able to speak directly with Admiral Hackett. "Here's the debrief we received from Hackett's staff. Joker has a course plotted and we're cleared to depart at your word."

"Do it," Shepard ordered, reading the pad until they reached the security scanner, not looking up as he spoke next. "Lieutenant, you handled the recall of everyone to the ship nicely. Well done."

James brightened, straightening up. "Thank you, sir. I appreciate your confidence in me. Especially considering how… "

A beep indicated the security scan was complete and Shepard instantly proceeded, effectively cutting James off as he hurried along with his commander.

"That's done with, James, and we won't discuss it again unless we _have_ to, which, you've assured me, we _won't_," Shepard said as he strode into the War Room, an eyebrow arched as he handed the data pad back to James. "Now, I need to speak with the admiral. I'll come find you later; I'd like to hear how Abby did at the Armax arena. Dismissed."

"Yes, sir," James nodded, turning to leave the War Room as the commander entered the video conference area. He cued up his omni-tool. "Joker, kick the tires and light the fires. Shepard says we're a go."

"Copy that," replied the pilot. "ETA four hours, twenty-one minutes. Joker out."

James felt the change in the ship as the FTL drive came online and the metal plates under his feet began to vibrate ever-so-slightly as he stood awaiting his clearance through the security station outside of the conference room. With a nod from the two young women posted there, he moved forward and entered the CIC again, making a beeline for the elevator.

A moment later, stepping off onto the deck of the hangar bay, he called out a hello to Steve as he returned to his work station at the side of the bay. To his surprise, Abby was seated on his work bench.

"Hey," he said, smiling at her. She was a little tousled from their matches earlier at the arena, a smudge of dirt still on her chin. "Thought you were hitting the showers."

"I was, but I decided I'd wait to speak with you first. I hope I'm not interrupting or keeping you from something."

He studied her for a second and stepped close. "Nope. I'm all yours."

Biting her lower lip, she held his gaze. "Good."

He felt something inside him change at her simple reply and for a moment they both just smiled at one another. A loud bang of metal on metal startled them both and Steve called out an apology to everyone on the floor, breaking the moment.

"Right. I just wanted to thank you for today," she said quietly, pushing herself off the bench. "I had a lot of fun and to be honest, it's the first time since I've arrived here that I felt like, well, like myself. You're really rather wonderful to have thought of it."

"Esteban helped."

She smiled softly. "Yes, he did, and I have thanked him as well." She shimmied forward and hopped down off of the work bench. "Since I'm sure you're busy, I'll let you get to work," she finished, walking past him.

"Hey, Abby? Uh, do you, I mean," he paused, nervously shifting his weight. "At the risk of embarrassing myself completely, I want to ask you something."

"Of course."

He cleared his throat, his eyes not quite meeting hers. "What… how, _if_ you were back in Ferelden, how would someone like me, you know, get a chance to, ah, spend some more time with you? I mean, just, you know, for my understanding. Of Ferelden."

Her eyes twinkled as she managed to contain her smile. "Ah, well, that would have been a tad complicated. You see, my father was rather well-placed and our family quite high-ranking in our society, so a specific etiquette would need to be adhered to. You would have been required to obtain my father's express permission."

"Then what?"

"If he felt you were acceptable, we would have closely supervised and pre-planned time together," she explained. "Someone such as a trusted friend of the family, or even my mother, would attend us when we met."

"Huh. That'd make it fun."

"Shockingly enough, no," she replied cheekily, her eyes still twinkling. "Why? Is it so very different here? How would, say someone such as myself, go about it if I wanted to spend time with _you_?"

A slow grin spread across his face. "Well, for starters, you wouldn't have to ask my pops, that's for sure."

"Good, one less step."

"Does that mean you're asking?"

She went pink and smiled. "I might be. Shall I seek out the commander for his permission?"

"Ah, hell no."

She giggled as he chuckled. "And is it bad form for people to simply ask the other person?"

"No, it's the _only_ form," he answered lightly, watching her closely. "Sounds like it's a little less complicated here than in Ferelden."

"It does, doesn't it?" she smiled. "Alright then, if I won't be breaking social decorum then yes, I think I am asking you. I'd like to spend time with you, James. May we do so?"

"A date, you and me."

She arched an eyebrow. "A date? Is that what it's called? That's an odd name."

"Yeah, a date. Where it's just you and me and we go out for some dinner maybe, or check out a movie together. Just us, no chaperone."

"Scandalous how things are done here," she teased. "Still, it does sound like fun, doesn't it? Yes, I am asking you out on a… what did you call it again?"

He chuckled. "A date."

"A date, then. What do you say? Can I tempt you?"

His eyes darkened. "Yes, that you most definitely can."

Again their gazes held until Abby backed away a step, her heart skipping a beat. "Good, good. I'd best go and clean up," she whispered. "I must look a fright."

"Nah, you're beautiful. Even with dirt on your chin."

Her hand shot up to her chin and she rubbed the smear there, spotting the dirt on her fingertips. "See? A fright."

"So when are we going on our date? Since you're doin' the asking."

Pausing, she shrugged, faking a casualness she didn't quite feel. "How about when you can, after this mission the admiral has sent you all on is completed?"

"Perfect," he replied. "Maybe we could check out this new restaurant I've heard about, back on the Citadel," he suggested as his omni-tool began to glow.

"Lieutenant Vega to the War Room. Liara, if you're available to join us, I'd appreciate it," called out the commander.

James tapped his arm. "Acknowledged, sir. Vega out," he finished and the tool became translucent once more. "I'm sorry, I need to go."

Abby nodded, walking with him to the elevator. "Of course."

They stood quietly together, each acutely aware of the other, soft smiles on their faces. She insisted that James go to the CIC first and as the elevator slowed, he leaned in and kissed her cheek lightly.

"See you later," he said quickly, stepping off and not waiting for her reply. "On our date."

The doors slid shut as she touched her cheek, the warmth of his lips still felt under her fingertips.

**xXx**

Liara entered the security checkpoint a few seconds after James. "Hello, James. How was your simulator match with Abby and Lieutenant Cortez?"

"Great, though Esteban and Abby fight like a bunch of sneaky bastards," he replied good-naturedly. "I tell you, Liara, Abby's pretty fierce with an omni-bow. I can see why the Wardens wanted her."

"Yes, so Steve said," Liara replied evenly. "Apparently, she is rather astute with her _aim_," she smiled. "If you'd like, I can ask Glyph to acquire a new shield modulator for any particular areas you found harder to protect."

With a shake of his head, he ignored the teasing suggestion as they were finally cleared through security and entered the War Room. Shepard was standing at the central console, his eyes locked on a holographic image of a planet.

"Eden Prime," Liara said softly as she stepped down to the console. "Where it all began."

Shepard nodded. "Yup. We've been ordered back. Apparently there's been some more Cerberus activity there."

"Why?" James inquired. "I thought the Alliance was letting the colonists oust Cerberus? We fed all that intel to their resistance before we revived Javik."

"Good question," Shepard replied. "And you're right, we did, but the data stream from that resistance movement went dark two days ago, and Hackett is very eager to know why."

"I agree something like this should be investigated, Shepard, but it hardly seems an appropriate mission for us," Liara commented. "Unless there's more to it."

"There is," the commander answered. "The colonists have held their own against Cerberus, so much so that the Alliance was able to place a science and recovery team back at the dig site near the main settlement. The last relay from their lead researcher indicated that they'd located what they deemed a 'remarkable find'."

"Prothean artifacts?" Liara queried. "The planet has always been a valuable archaeological resource for the study of their culture."

"That's where you were given the cipher, right Commander?" James asked.

"No, that came later, but this is where I received my vision of the Reapers, and where I first encountered Saren and the geth. Hackett is very eager to identify what's happening down there and what this 'find' is."

"Do you think it's connected to why the data stream dropped off?" James asked.

Shepard nodded. "I think that's a reasonable conclusion, given that Cerberus is as eager as we are to get any new data connected with the Crucible."

"If it's got Cerberus's attention, then it's worth something," James grunted. "Besides, it's a chance to take a few more of those bastards out, make a dent in their numbers down there."

"True enough," the commander agreed. "Let's just hope it's as simple as that."

"Right now, every single scrap of data we can yield from the protheans is critical in developing and understanding the Crucible. There's no telling what could be found down there," Liara breathed. "Did the admiral have any further details? How many troopers are down there? What will we be facing?"

Shepard shook his head. "There's almost no intel, so we're going in a little blind. Regardless, our mission is to find the science team and, if necessary, recover Alliance control of the dig site and any support buildings near it. After that, we'll have a better understanding of the situation."

"And if Cerberus has already removed this 'find'?" Liara asked, her tone hard. "If it is prothean, we're going to need it."

"Then we'll take it back," the commander replied. "We can't afford to lose anything else to Cerberus and who knows, whatever's down there may be the key to understanding the last few aspects of the Crucible. This is a critical mission. EDI? How far out are we from the colony?"

"At our current velocity, three hours and forty-nine minutes."

"I want to know when we're close. Keep me posted, EDI," he finished and then looked at Liara and James. "You two get to Liara's office and study up on the final few data feeds from the team down there. I've forwarded everything the admiral had to you, Liara. The more we understand about the find and the circumstances of it the more effective we'll be. We're going in assuming there will be resistance. Be ready."

"Yes, sir," James replied. "Anything further, sir?"

"No, that should do it," answered Shepard, glancing at the time glowing under the holographic image. "It's late. Have either of you eaten yet?"

Liara shook her head and James spoke. "No."

"Let's head to the Mess and grab something quick. We can go over the rest of this in Liara's office while we eat."

"Good, I'm starving," Liara agreed, moving toward the exit, leaving the men to follow her.

Shepard clapped a hand on James's shoulder. "So, I hear Abby's a wicked shot with the omni-bow?"

James laughed, realizing from the commander's tone that Steve had already shared with him how Abby had successfully shot him in his backside. "If the target's right, yes sir."

"You okay? Do you need Chakwas to ice it?"

James blushed, shaking his head. "Nah, I'm good, sir, but thanks for checking on my ass."

"Hey, I'm your commanding officer, James. I _care_," he joked, walking through the CIC and back to the elevator. "Come on, you can tell me all about it while we get some dinner."

**xXx**

The surface of the colony was beautiful. Lush and green, the colors across the horizon were vibrant and breathtaking, enhancing what was already an impossibly stunning sunrise.

Unfortunately, the billowing black smoke from multiple fires sullied the effect.

James was seated in the cockpit next to Steve, the protective shutters retracted as they made their final approach. To the pilot's shock they'd encountered no resistance whatsoever, so together they were taking advantage of the vista to relax before he dropped his crew mates into a potentially hostile location.

Steve glanced over at James. "You ready? We're two minutes out if you need to finish suiting up."

"Nah, I'm good," he replied easily. "Besides, the commander and Liara are talking about something and I got the sense I should skedaddle, you know?"

"Oh," the pilot said. "Wonder what's up?"

"Something about the quarians. I tried not to listen too much, but it sounded serious and they had their heads together. Figured I'd ride up here."

"Well, I'm glad for the company," Steve replied with a smile, his eyes trained on his console. "Commander!" he called over his shoulder. "We're over the landing zone. Looks good, sir, I'm not seeing or reading any active gunfire and those craters in the vicinity are too cold to be recent. Maybe made in the last few days but the heat's going out of 'em."

"Thanks, Lieutenant," Shepard replied, approaching the shuttle's door. "Set us down and stay out of sight until I get some idea of what's happening here."

"Yes, sir," Steve agreed. "Good luck. Be safe out there."

The shuttle hovered a few feet above the surface and the doors opened, Shepard cocking his weapon before he leapt down. James and Liara immediately followed and the shuttle quickly returned to a high altitude and was soon out of sight.

"Looks quiet, sir," James commented, looking around them. "Sounds quiet, too."

"It appeared so the last time we were here as well," Liara noted, her tone one of caution. "I believe we should proceed with care."

"We always do," Shepard replied, gesturing their direction. "Let's get moving."

**xXx**

Nearly three hours had passed and Shepard was radioing Steve who, once Shepard had confirmed there were no hostiles to contend with, had been ordered back to the Normandy. Now, having learned all he could from the settlement's leadership and, after locating the Alliance science team, he needed his trusted pilot to return.

"Right away, Commander," Steve replied to Shepard's request. "I'll head out right now."

Shepard, tucked around the side of a support building, took advantage of his privacy. "You doing okay? How's your morning been?"

"Good, Abby's here and she's been keeping me company while I update the merchandizing list and inventory on your support console in the bay. How about you?"

"Fine. This turned out to be nothing like I'd worried it would be. Seems the colony went dark because they were making their last efforts against Cerberus and were radio silent," he explained. "And they did it too, they cleaned house. Cerberus fled yesterday, but took a few pot shots on their way out and that's what's slowed up getting communications back online."

"That _is_ great news," Steve replied. "Those folks on Eden Prime are fighters, I'm glad they were able to shove Cerberus off of their colony. What about the science team?"

"That's one of the reasons I need you back here," Shepard explained. "They're here and they're fine. Turns out their 'find' is a new beacon. It's intact."

"Are you okay?"

Shepard smiled softly, touched by his lover's concern. "I'm fine, I promise. It's a lot smaller than the one I encountered. It's dormant, but it may not be once Javik gets near it, or it might stay that way, who knows. Regardless, it's leaving with us today and we're delivering it back to the Citadel, Hackett's orders. I've spoken with Javik, and while he's proudly reminded me he's a soldier, and _not_ a scientist, he's agreed to remain on the Citadel with it for a bit, assuming this thing does anything with him nearby."

"Makes sense," Steve commented. "I'm glad you're okay, Adam. Those nightmares –"

"Are better now that you're with me at night," Shepard said quickly, not wishing to focus on any potential side effects he might experience while they were relocating the beacon. "Wish you could see Liara though, she's like a kid in a candy store. She actually bounced."

Steve laughed and Shepard could hear Abby's softer giggle in the background. "Hey, if Abby would like to, why not bring her down to the surface with you? James is going to stay here until later. He's working with the colonist leaders, getting the details on Cerberus and their exodus. She could keep him company and explore a little."

Shepard listened as Steve posed the question to Abby, who very cheerily agreed. "We'll be right down."

Shepard smiled and tapped his omni-tool lightly. "Looking forward to it. Here're the coordinates for the landing pad where the beacon is. Shepard out."

**xXx**

It was early afternoon by the time Shepard, Steve and Liara departed the surface of Eden Prime. The leader of the science team had elected to travel with them, eager for the chance to speak directly with Admiral Hackett about their discovery. Liara and the young scientist would then spend a few hours preparing the storage area in the hangar of the Normandy for transport of the modest sized beacon.

They'd return by the end of the day and remove the beacon; the Normandy's crew would then deliver it and the science team's leader to the Citadel, where a more thorough study could be conducted.

James, standing with Abby at his side, watched the shuttle gently lift off and slowly bank before picking up velocity and quickly moving through the air, eventually becoming a speck against the warm blue sky.

Turning to her, he smiled. "Well, looks like we've got the place to ourselves for a while," he teased as he waggled his eyebrows.

She grinned. "Yes, I suppose we do," she replied, glancing around before her eyes met his. "What would you like to do?"

"First, I'd like to speak with that guy, Logan, the resistance leader I was told about. I want to make sure he can still meet with me with their reports, like his troops said. He's supposed to be coming in from another settlement but won't be here for another couple hours. I just want to solidify our times so I don't miss him."

"And second?"

His stomach rumbled. "Get something to eat?"

"Eat? Hmm. We're spending time alone and eating? Is this our date?"

He shrugged, his eyes twinkling. "Depends. Does hanging out in a ramshackle colony and getting grub from some hole-in-the-wall sound like fun?"

"As a matter of fact it does, but only because I find the company pleasant."

"Then it's a date," he said softly and then looked down at himself. "Though I don't know if full body armor is the right thing to wear on a first date. I usually try to look a little nicer than this."

"I think you look quite handsome," she said, nudging him as she stepped past, walking toward the cropping of buildings. She turned around, walking backwards and smiling. "Besides, you've not been on a date with _me_. Who knows? You may need it," she called out cheekily as he laughed and hurried to catch up.

They walked quietly together as they re-entered the main drag through the settlement, James nodding hello to the few fighters they passed by. He guided her through a small alleyway between two modular structures and it opened to a small courtyard, tables and chairs scattered around it.

"One of the locals said there's a guy back here cooking," he explained. "Street food mostly, fried noodles and some drinks, maybe. We could see if he's still serving if you want to."

"Certainly, of course," she replied, following him to a smaller building at the back of the courtyard. A dirty looking man was there, nodding politely to her as he spoke to James.

"I haven't got a lot to offer, Alliance," he said, shaking his head. "But I've still got some rice noodles and a few fried pieces of pork to toss into it. I got nothin' but water to offer you and it's only boiled at that."

"That'll do, sir," James replied politely. "Is there enough for two?"

"Yeah, assuming she don't eat a lot. Water jug is over at the end there. Grab whatever cups you can find. I'll bring you your food in a minute. It'll be fifty credits."

"Fifty! Are you kidding me?" James exclaimed, shaking his head. "Man, those better be some freakin' amazing noodles back there!"

"They are, 'cause you're hungry and I'm the only one in this town cooking," snapped the man before shrugging. "Unless you don't want it, or you think you'll talk somebody else into handing over their personal stores, it's fifty credits."

James scowled but nodded. "Fine. Thanks, I guess."

A few minutes later, James had confirmed his meeting time with Logan, and he and Abby were settled at a table near the mouth of the courtyard. The cook crossed from his hovel of a kitchen and respectfully placed Abby's bowl in front of her; he then dropped James's down in front of him and turned on his heel.

"Hey, yeah, thanks! Great service!" James called out sourly as Abby struggled to not laugh. With a roll of his eyes, he picked up his fork and dug into the noodles, his face twisting as he swallowed the first bite.

"Interesting flavour," she noted, taking a bite of her own. "Do they always taste so?"

"No. Usually they taste _good_."

With a gentle smile, she made a point of raving about her noodles and James chuckled at her false enthusiasm.

"They're pretty nasty if you ask me," he said, stirring them around in the plastic bowl.

"I think they're wonderful," she argued, taking a hearty bite. "Thank you for buying me lunch."

He smiled at her, watching her choke down her mouthful. "You're something else, you know that?"

"Oh? How so?"

He put his fork down and leaned forward, studying her. "Well, let's see. You wound up here, with all of us, after killing a dragon, and you're faced everyday with something new or weird to you. You've barely batted an eyelash at it all and –"

"Oh, now, James, you know very well that's not true. I would remind you of my first night on the Normandy, when we were orbiting Tuchanka. I batted several eyelashes then."

He shrugged. "Okay, sure, but even that was short-lived. You still listened, you still managed to work it out, to handle yourself. I just think that all things considered, you sittin' here, hanging out with me on an entirely new planet, smiling and joking, trying to make me feel good about feeding you some seriously disgusting noodles is... well, it's something. More than something. It's amazing, like you."

She blushed softly, pushing her bowl aside. "They could be worse. The noodles, I mean."

He laughed. "How?"

She looked thoughtful for a moment and then laughed as well. "I'm not sure, actually. But the water does help wash it down, so that's good," she said with a smile, sitting back. "James, where are you from? What's it like there?"

"Change of subject? Okay," he replied, pushing his bowl away as well. "Earth. West Coast of North America. I grew up on the California coast, crappy town called North Long Beach. It's a tough place, lots of crime, people messin' around with red sand, drug dealers, that kind of stuff. Mom took off when I was little, Pops was never around, and so my abuela raised me, and my uncle helped. They're good people, still got a couple of cousins there, or at least, I hope I do. Who knows with the Reapers landing."

"Have you heard from your uncle? Your... abuela?"

He smiled at her hesitant pronunciation. "That means grandmother, and she passed a few years ago. As far as my uncle and cousins, no, I haven't heard anything. Just gotta hope for the best, I guess."

"May I pray for them?"

"Yeah," he said slowly, touched by the sentiment. "My abuela would have liked that."

She nodded. "What else? When did you join the Alliance?"

"Right when I turned eighteen. Fastest ticket out of that place you could get, unless you were headed for lock-up, so I took it. I wasn't sure I'd be any good at this sort of thing, but I like it, the Alliance, living this kind of life. It's been good to me. Good _for_ me."

"I can understand that," she commented. "I embarked on my quest with the Wardens with much the same feelings, but somehow, despite logic indicating otherwise, I ended up making a rather decent warden after all."

"What do you mean, 'logic indicating otherwise'?"

She shrugged. "Well, I'm the second child of titled parents. My brother had a son, so my father had two heirs in place. My chances of inheriting his lands and titles were minimal at best."

He shook his head, his confusion showing on his face. "What does that have to do with it?"

Leaning forward, she braced her elbows on the table, looking thoughtful as she continued. "My family had a long history of service to the Crown and to our people, but that only remained possible as long as we were relevant to the political games played at court, and our connections to the other ruling families held strong."

"Okay, I'm with you."

"Fergus would have taken over Highever after my father's death and Oren after his. My place in line would have moved further back had Fergus had more children. Which meant, since I wouldn't lead the Cousland family or guide our lands, the most probable way of my aiding our position would have been through a strong marriage."

He sat back, frowning. "Like an arranged one or something?"

She nodded. "Of course. For families of our status, everything is arranged, negotiated and pre-contracted. My point is, becoming a warden, battling our way through my homeland and killing a dragon was a bit of a step outside of those expectations."

"But it worked out. You did it, you saved everybody and lived to tell the tale."

Her eyes were troubled for a moment but she quickly smiled. "So it would seem," she answered quietly. "Well, what shall we do next?"

He stood up, offering her his hand. "How about I show you the view from the ridgeline? It's pretty awesome and it's not a bad walk. You interested?"

"Very much so. Lead the way."

**xXx**

They walked to the vantage point and sat in the tall grass, taking in the view and sharing more stories of their youth. Eventually their conversation turned to her arrival on the Citadel, her first few days on the Normandy, his time in the med bay and the advice she'd shared after his warning from Shepard.

"That little talk we had, it really helped me out, you know?" he said softly as he reached out and brushed a curl of her hair from her face. "It sounds nuts, but with you, things make more sense. It's like I get a fresh perspective but wasn't aware I needed one. You're good at making me consider things I normally wouldn't."

"Oh, I hadn't intended to, I mean, I hope that's alright? I don't want to be pushing my opinions down your throat, I would never wish –"

"I like it," he interrupted. "I like a lot of things about you."

She pulled her knees up to her chin and studied him for a moment. "I like you, too, very much. May I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"Why did you kiss me that day? In the med bay? No one's ever done such a thing," she confessed with a smile.

"You've never been kissed?"

"Of course I have," she said quickly, her cheeks reddening. "I'm not a _complete_ prude, you know. I've just not had a man be so... direct before. It's different where I'm from!"

He grinned, chuckling. "You're awful cute when you're all pink like that," he teased, laughing when she hid her face further. "Come on, you're too pretty to hide."

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "You're a _flirt_ of the first order, Lieutenant."

"I can't help myself with you," he confessed.

"James!" she giggled, as she met his eyes.

"Alright, let's see. _Why_ did I kiss you? Honest to God, it shocked the hell out of me when I did that but I don't regret it, not for a second," he confessed. "I get around you and... I don't know, I feel like everything with you is easier, more natural. Does that make any sense? Kissing you was instinct. I didn't even think about it."

Her eyes turned back to the view before them as he scooted against her, turning so that he could put his arm around her waist. "Why'd you kiss me?" he asked, his chin now on her shoulder.

She turned ever so slowly to face him, their noses almost touching. "Because I wanted to."

"Oh," he breathed, his eyes locked with hers. "Simple."

"Yes, it is," she rasped as they came together, their mouths hungry for the other.

This kiss was altogether different from the others they'd shared; this kiss had heat and want in it. His tongue feathered across her lips and she opened her mouth, allowing him to kiss her fully. She clung to him as he drew her tight against him, each making soft sounds as they melted into the sensations this new level of connection rendered.

They parted, both struggling to do so, breathing heavily as they did. There was desire and lust and so much more in her eyes as he steadied himself, his forehead resting against hers as their hearts slowed. She placed a single soft kiss to his brow as she sat back slightly.

"Maker, James," she muttered through swollen lips.

"Yeah... yeah."

She smiled slightly, blinking rapidly. "I expect we'd best... I mean, perhaps you should double check the hour? I know you needed to meet with that fellow."

"Right. Good idea," he agreed, tapping his omni-tool and nodding. "You're right, we need to head back," he said, standing slowly and then offering her a hand, pulling her to her feet. "Does this end our first date?"

"I expect it does," she replied. "But you said 'first', so does that mean there shall be a second?"

"There can be fifty if you want, Abby. I'm all yours. You've got my undivided attention and then some."

She smiled slowly, glancing down at her boots before grinning widely back up at him. "If I were a more sophisticated woman this would be the part where I come up with some cheeky line, but I don't have one. So I'll just admit that I, too, am all yours, James."

He matched her smile. "Huh. Guess we're both in this thing neck deep then, aren't we?"

"We appear to be."

His omni-tool beeped, reminding them of his appointment back at the settlement. "We'd better get back," he said sheepishly. "Thanks for our date."

"Thank you."

They began the walk back down the hill, moving side by side as they navigated the trail. "Hey Abby, one last question. Do _all_ the wardens kiss like that? 'Cause that was one hell of a kiss."

With a laugh, she shoved him gently. "You're horrible!"

He grinned, grabbing her hand and hurrying with her back to the town.

**xXx**

Another hour passed and James and Abby met Shepard and Steve back at the dig site. The Normandy was ready to receive the beacon and a special crew chosen from the scientists was overseeing the loading of the artifact into the Kodiak.

James was quietly talking with Shepard, sharing the last of the details he'd learned from his meeting with resistance leader Logan, leaving Abby and Steve to chat.

Laughing at something Steve had shared, she paused, hearing a strange humming noise. "Is that... is that the beacon?" she asked, turning toward the ancient object. "Does it look different? Like it's got a mist around it? And can you hear that hum?"

Steve frowned, shaking his head. "It wasn't doing that earlier. Commander! Something's happening with the beacon!"

Abby crossed the area to it, her hands over her ears. "It's so loud! What's wrong with it?" she yelled over her shoulder.

Shepard and James were moving quickly to her as the beacon lit and began to glow. "Abby!" Shepard cried, beginning to run toward her. "Stop!"

He was too late.

It pulled her closer in, dragging her the last several feet and then lifted her straight into the air. Her muscles locked, her back arched in a sickening posture and she went rigid. James roared and ran forward, Shepard and Steve barely able to restrain him.

"It's hurting her! What's it doing?" he screamed, struggling against their holds. "Let me go!"

"No! Stop, James, listen to me! If we pull her free it could fry her brain!" Shepard argued fiercely. "It's communicating with her! It's in her head! We have to let it run its course, if we break the connection for her, she could die!"

James shook his head but stopped fighting to reach her, looking on helplessly as she remained suspended. Several members of the science team entered the area, some stopping and watching Abby, while others began working on their omni-tools, the beacon now beginning to hum at a deafening level.

Its light ceased and she crumpled to the ground, James reaching her mere seconds later. "Abby!" he cried as the beacon suddenly exploded. He covered her body with his, smoke and small debris raining down for a moment.

Pushing up, he touched her face. "Abby! Abby! Wake up!"

Shepard was standing over them both, his omni-tool running medical scans of his friend. Behind him, Steve was already speaking with Dr. Chakwas, notifying her of their medical emergency as the science team ran further scans.

"Nothing! It's dead!" called out one woman, shaking her head. "Commander, we're in the clear!"

"She's alive, James, but we need to get her to the ship and we need to do it now," the commander said rapidly. "Can you carry her?"

"Of course," James said in a strangled voice, cradling her gently as he stood. "I've got you," he whispered to her.

Steve ran ahead to the Kodiak and as Shepard and James boarded, Abby still limp in Vega's arms, the shuttle was ready for flight. James sat carefully, holding Abby as if she were made of glass, his face white.

"This happened to you, right?" he demanded of his commander, not looking up from Abby's ashen face. "Is that how it went down? What did it do to you?"

"Yeah," Shepard replied, his voice tight. "That's exactly how it happened to me. Don't worry, she's tough and Chakwas has already seen somebody like this before, she'll know what to expect and what to do."

"She's gonna be okay, right? That thing didn't just cook her brain, did it?"

Shepard stood, shaking his head. "It didn't cook mine."

"Okay," James whispered, his lips pressing gently to Abby's brow as he held her against him. "Okay."

**xXx**

Her stomach rolled as she shifted and she immediately stilled.

"Maker, that's awful," she whispered, not daring to open her eyes, even the slightest sensation making her want to retch.

"Lie still, Abby," instructed a woman's voice, one which Abby realized belonged to Dr. Chakwas. "I'll get you something for the nausea."

"She's awake? Is she okay?"

Abby was comforted to hear James, but not the fear in his voice. She opened her eyes and turned toward him. "I'm fine," she rasped and then promptly threw up.

James grabbed her and turned her onto her side as Dr. Chakwas hurried back, tapping her omni-tool rapidly.

"There, Abby, that should do the trick. Try to remain as still as you can, I want to run a quick scan," the doctor explained as she waved her arm over Abby's body. "Good. Your brain scans are still normal and the R.E.M. activity is over."

"So she's good?"

Chakwas smiled kindly at James. "Yes, she's 'good'. Abby? How do you feel? Are you ready to sit up now?"

Abby nodded and James gently cradled her, helping her to a seated position. "Maker, what a headache! What happened?"

"That beacon's what happened," James growled, his tone angry but his eyes filled with concern. "It picked you up, Shepard and the doc here think it tried to communicate with you."

"Are we correct, Abby?" Chakwas asked quietly. "Did it communicate with you?"

Abby closed her eyes and gruesome images filled her mind as fear overwhelmed her. She nodded. "I believe so."

"Machines? That's what you saw, wasn't it? Mayhem, slaughter, terror."

James and Chakwas turned to see Shepard standing near the door of the med bay, his entrance unheard until he'd spoken. His eyes were locked with Abby's.

"Yes," she whispered in reply. "Something... something like a war, but _so_ much more than that."

"Reapers," Shepard said coldly. "You saw the warnings the protheans left us."

"But, no, it _can't_ have been a message," she argued. "It was so jumbled, like parts of a story but not all of it. How could that possibly warn anyone? It makes no sense."

"No, it wouldn't. There's more to it, yes, but we already know what the protheans intended us to learn. I'm just sorry it happened, I should have been more careful," Shepard explained as he turned to Chakwas. "Is Abby alright? Any ill-effects?"

"None," Chakwas replied. "She seems to have had much the same experience as you did, though her stomach is a bit touchy. I've treated her for it, though."

"Yes, my stomach is fine now, thank you, Doctor. I apologize for the mess."

Doctor Chakwas's omni-tool was lit as she smiled kindly. "Nothing I've not seen before. This is something for your headache, let me know if it returns. Otherwise, if you feel up to it, I'd recommend you return to your quarters and rest."

Abby nodded. "What about the beacon? Are we still going back to the Citadel with it?"

"No," Shepard replied. "It destroyed itself after it engaged with you. The science team did get some interesting readings from it as it interacted with you but there's nothing for us to transport."

"I'm sorry," Abby said. "I didn't mean to –"

"Nothing to be sorry for, Abby. It doesn't appear that it had anything more to share with us than another warning and you didn't choose to be the one to receive it. It chose you."

"Yeah, it picked you up, it took control of you," James explained harshly. "It was horrible, watching it just snatch you up like that."

Abby frowned, placing her hand on James's.

"She's okay," Shepard said to James, his tone reassuring. "It's over, James. Why don't you walk her to her quarters? I'll stop by the Mess and get her something simple to eat and meet you there in a few minutes."

"Right, okay, good idea," James replied as Abby moved her legs over the side of the bed and he helped her to stand. "You good?" he asked her quietly and once she nodded, he wrapped his arm protectively around her waist and they left for her quarters.

As the med bay doors drew shut, Shepard turned back to Chakwas. "I'd like you to keep an eye on her, Doc. Find her something to do around here, maybe, but something that will let you watch her over the next couple of days. I didn't feel the full effect of my time with the beacon until a few days after I woke up."

"I remember and I agree with you, Commander, but for more reasons than those. Abby is ancient for a human and beyond that, she is, as she explained, 'tainted'. It's possible that she will react to this exposure in a far different way than you did."

Shepard sighed. "I hadn't considered that. I'm glad you're here, Karin. Thanks."

"Of course. Now, you'd best get some sleep yourself, Commander, once you've taken Abby some food. I'll log my readings of her brainwave activity and let you know if I see anything unusual. Good night."

"Good night," replied the commander who, heart heavy with worry for his friend, left for the Mess.


	12. Putting a Face On

**War Room**

"So it wouldn't have helped Cerberus to get their hands on that beacon anyway, since it contained no new data," Shepard reported to Hackett.

The admiral nodded. "Cerberus doesn't know that. Any loss of their troops or morale is a win for us. It sounds like the colonists really held their own. My guess is that once Cerberus learns the beacon was destroyed, they'll finally leave the colony alone."

"That would be my guess, too."

"So how _was_ the beacon destroyed? Did it interact with you?"

"No, sir. A civilian came under its influence. She was evaluated by medical staff and released, no worse for wear."

"Glad to hear it. Was there anything else, Commander?"

"Yes, sir. Liara believes she's located the Migrant Fleet through her information network."

Hackett folded his arms, his eyebrows raised. "That's pretty surprising. We've had some of our best people on this and all they've come up with so far are unconfirmed sightings or rumours. Is her intel reliable?"

"She assures me it is, sir, and I trust her judgement," Shepard replied, tapping his omni-tool as he spoke. "I've just transmitted you the findings. There were some unusual indicators which may explain why there's been so little word of the Fleet's movements. With your permission, I'd like to meet up with the Admiralty to determine where they stand on the Reaper threat."

"Permission granted, Commander. The quarians have been silent about the Reapers so far, but they can't hide from the threat forever – sooner or later the Reapers will come knocking on their door."

"Agreed."

"They have the largest fleet in the galaxy. Combining that might with their technical know-how, they'd be a tremendous asset to add to our alliance," the admiral continued, glancing down at his own omni-tool. "I'm looking at Dr. T'Soni's data now. Does this mean what I think it does?"

"Yes, sir. Liara believes those energy signatures are possible weapons fire."

Hackett sighed, shaking his head. "Get out there and make the quarians see they need to get on board with our efforts _now_. They're too important a potential ally to let slip through the cracks, no matter their vendetta against the geth, and you need to make them see that. This may be a hard sell."

"I'm prepared for that eventuality, sir. I'll just appeal to their better natures," Shepard said with a sly smile.

"I know you will, Commander. Be careful out there and keep me posted. Hackett out."

Keeping the comm. link open, Shepard radioed the bridge. "Joker. Take us back to the Citadel so we can pick up Major Alenko, then set a course for the Dholen system."

"Aye aye, Commander. Dholen? We gonna be paying Tali a social visit?"

"If she's around, sure, but the plan is to meet with the Admiralty," he replied, sounding less than enthusiastic.

"All play and no work, huh, Commander?" Joker commented dryly. "I remember those admirals weren't exactly the kind of people I'd hang out with. Except maybe at a wake or something."

"I'm not looking to make friends with them," Shepard said as he made his way out of the War Room. "I want them for one thing and one thing only."

"What, you're not even gonna buy them dinner?"

Shepard smiled and shook his head. "Not today. How long to Dholen?"

"Let's see… pick up Kaidan, back to the relay… six-and-a-half hours, tops."

"Roger that. I'm gonna catch a little shut-eye while I have the chance. Let me know when we're approaching the geth border."

"Will do. Pleasant dreams, Commander."

"Thanks, Joker. Shepard out."

~o~O~o~

**The Dholen System, post-destruction of geth dreadnought**

"Look who I found hanging around," Garrus announced as he strolled into the Mess, Tali at his side.

"Hey, Tali," Kaidan greeted, rising and offering the quarian his seat. "I heard you were on board. Good to see you again."

"You, too," she replied as she sat down, and Joker, Abby and James moved along to make room for the new arrivals. Garrus and Kaidan borrowed chairs from neighbouring tables and joined them.

"Tali, you know everyone else at the table except Abby," said Kaidan. "She's a friend of Shepard's. Well, she's our friend, too, now."

"Nice to meet you, Abby," Tali said with a nod.

"Likewise," Abby replied with a warm smile, offering her hand to Tali. "I've heard a lot about you."

"If you heard it from Shepard, don't believe a word of it," the quarian joked, shaking Abby's hand and releasing it. "So," she began, looking at Kaidan, "are _you_ and Shepard friends again?"

He nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah. It's past history. We put all that behind us."

"Hey," Joker butted in. "Sorry to crash the emotional reunion and all, but what's this I hear about Shepard throwing Admiral Gerrell's ass off of the ship?"

"He what?" Kaidan exclaimed. "Why?"

"Because that bosh'tet tried to destroy the dreadnought while we were still on board!" Tali huffed indignantly.

"I remember that part," said Garrus, sitting back and crossing his arms. "Hm. Ranks up there among my top ten most 'interesting' experiences. When we arrived back, Tali and Raan were arguing with Gerrell in the War Room when Shepard comes stomping down the steps, two at a time."

"Uh-oh," Joker muttered. "Was he wearing the 'angry face'?"

"Oh, yeah," drawled the turian. "He brought out the big guns."

James winced. "Man, I've seen the angry face enough times to know that admiral was _screwed_."

"Well, Shepard squares up to Gerrell," Garrus went on, "and the guy's so full of himself, he puffs his chest out and just assumes Shepard will understand because he's military. Shepard understood, all right. He understood how to pop him right in the gut."

"Then he yelled, 'get the hell off my ship'!" Tali recounted excitedly. "Gerrell didn't wait around to be told twice."

"Smart guy," James chuckled with a glance at Abby, who was doing a poor job of masking her concern. "Hey, what's up?" he whispered to her while the others continued the conversation.

"Is Adam all right?" she quietly asked. "He doesn't seem the type to lose his temper unless he's under a lot of pressure."

"Nah, he's good, he just doesn't take any crap, that's all," James reassured her. "That SOB nearly got 'em killed. Think I'd have done a lot more than punch the guy in the stomach. Are _you _all right?" he asked softly. "You know Shepard'll look into those asteroids just as soon as he's done with the quarians, don't you?"

"Oh, of course!" she answered, forcing a cheerful tone and ensuring she was laughing along with the others.

"It was fun to hear Shepard shout again," Tali confessed, "although in my official capacity as admiral, it was an… 'unfortunate misunderstanding that was quickly cleared up'. Like _hell_ it was," she sniggered.

"So what do you think of Legion being on board?" James asked Tali.

She shrugged. "It could be useful. Shepard and it are discussing a way for Shepard to enter the geth consensus and shut off the Reaper command signal."

"Whoa, just a minute," Kaidan exclaimed. "Isn't that a little dangerous? And why Shepard?"

"Yeah," James agreed. "Don't get me wrong, but why can't one of your people do it? Wouldn't it benefit the quarians as well?"

Tali sighed and fidgeted a little. "We don't _have _anyone to spare. Just about everyone who can hold a pistol is committed to the fight against the geth. And Legion believes that no other organic will be able to interpret the consensus in the same way as Shepard, given his knowledge of the Reapers."

"Kaidan, James," Shepard announced over the comm. "We've located the crash site of Admiral Koris's ship. Meet me in the shuttle bay."

"On our way," Kaidan replied, and he and James rose.

"Wanna help me suit up?" James asked Abby, who also stood up.

"I wouldn't want to slow you down," she answered quickly, following the men out. "This sounds like quite an urgent mission. I'll see you when you return."

James and Kaidan stepped into the elevator, James pausing before selecting a destination. "Sure you're okay?"

"Oh, yes. To tell you the truth, I have an interesting book I'd quite like to finish. Please, don't let me keep you. And be careful."

James eyed her for a few seconds, a small frown appearing before he nodded. "Shuttle bay," he said, and the elevator door closed.

She sighed and closed her eyes for a second, feeling wretched for lying to him. But had she really been lying? How could she tell James what was wrong if even she didn't know?

Dr. Chakwas had been excellent as always in her care after Abby's disconcerting experience on Eden Prime, and physically Abby felt well, but inside she was uneasy, nervous and watchful, almost as if she was waiting for something horrible to happen. She'd kept these feelings at bay, knowing that she could always go to Adam if things became too overwhelming. Yet now, his departure imminent, she felt more vulnerable than ever, but knowing James would worry about her, she was determined not to let him see her anxiety.

She shuddered slightly, hating feeling so uncertain of herself. Glancing around, she gave a grim smile as a burst of laughter came from the Mess. Finding the noise strangely offensive, she quickly entered her quarters and instructed EDI to secure the door. Then, ignoring the book she'd meant to finish, she went to the window and looked out at the stars, wondering if she was looking in the direction of her home.

~o~O~o~

**The CIC, later that day**

A pin would have been heard dropping in the CIC, where several of Shepard's senior staff were crowded around the QEC at Traynor's console. James, Kaidan and Shepard had not returned to the Normandy since departing almost eight hours earlier, and Shepard had called Tali and Legion to join him on Rannoch shortly after.

Scattered reports of their activities had filtered through to the Normandy, including the news that Shepard had successfully infiltrated the geth consensus and emerged unscathed, but the latest news had Shepard's closest friends and crew members scrambling to the CIC: the landing party had engaged a Reaper on the planet's surface.

"Their vehicle's stopped," Traynor informed the small crowd, her eyes glued to her monitor.

"What's he doing?" Liara asked anxiously.

"Has the Reaper broken off pursuit?" asked Cortez.

"No," Traynor informed them. "It's still –"

"Quiet, damn it!" hissed Joker as the comm. crackled into life, and Legion's voice could be heard.

"Shepard Commander, if it is your intent to flee, we advise haste."

"No! If we retreat now, the geth stay under Reaper control and the quarians are dead. This ends now!"

"Dear God, no," whispered Cortez, backing away a step.

Garrus moved to his side. "He doesn't have a choice," he said gently.

"EDI!" Shepard ordered over the comm., "I want the targeting laser synced to the whole damned fleet! Get back!" he yelled at an unknown person.

"Shepard Commander –"

"Now! You too, James! Get the hell back! That's an order!"

"Synchronisation complete," said EDI.

Then, the comm. went dead.

"Shit!" Joker exclaimed, jostling Traynor, who was standing next to him. "_Do_ something!"

"It doesn't mean anything's wrong," she said, her fingers moving in a blur over her console. "I've been having problems resolving the signal all day. I suspect the Reaper's proximity might have something to do with it. Blast it!" she cursed, slamming her palm against the console. "I've lost them."

"We're in low orbit," Joker informed everyone, hobbling away. "We might be able to see something out of the port view screen."

The majority of the crowd quickly followed him, but Cortez was rooted to the spot and, noticing this, Garrus remained at his side. "This is _Shepard_," he reminded the pilot. "He's faced down death more times than I have scars, and he's kicked its ass every damn time. He'll make it."

Cortez gave a single nod and slowly moved to Traynor's console, leaning against it, the turian joining him. A reverential hush fell over the CIC as its staff waited for what seemed like an eternity.

"There!" a crew member exclaimed, pointing out of the view screen as hundreds of quarian cannons' fire converged at a single point on the planet's surface, lighting up the black void of space around it.

"Direct hit," EDI announced, and a loud cheer went up.

"Wait!" Traynor shouted above the noise. "It's still standing!"

After a few muttered expletives from the crew, the silence returned, and the remainder of the staff in the CIC abandoned any pretence of working and joined the others at the window. This time, the wait was agonisingly long before EDI confirmed another direct hit.

The silence held, all eyes turning to Traynor. She looked up, slowly shaking her head.

"Come on, Adam!" Cortez urged. "Hold on, damn it!"

"Yes, come on, Commander!" Traynor joined in, shaking her fist, and before long a constant chant of "Shepard! Shepard!" filled the CIC.

"Direct hit!" EDI exclaimed, almost sounding excited. "The Reaper is falling! It is down!"

A deafening clamour exploded around the CIC, and many hugs, back slaps and high-fives were exchanged. Cortez slumped against Traynor's console, shaking his head with his eyes closed. "Thank you. Thank you," he repeated over and over.

"Hey, Cortez," said Garrus, clapping the pilot on the shoulder. "Think those legs of yours can make it to the hangar? Because I'm guessing Shepard will need picking up."

"Direct hit," EDI said for the fourth time.

"Huh?" Garrus muttered. "I thought the Reaper had been defeated?"

"Another orbital strike was called for," the AI informed him. "There was a weak energy signature still emanating from the Reaper. I am detecting no further energy output."

"Hm. Just making sure," Garrus guessed. "Let's go," he said to Steve, who'd recovered enough to follow him to the elevator.

~o~O~o~

"So let me get this straight," Joker began from his chair in the cockpit. "You got the quarians and geth to _co-operate_? Did I hear that right?"

"You did," an exhausted-sounding Shepard replied from the Kodiak, which was on its way back to the Normandy. "Traynor, I'll need to speak with Admiral Hackett upon our return, as soon as he's available. Priority one."

"On it now, Commander," she replied.

"Also, take Kaidan and James off the duty roster for the next twelve hours. They need to sleep."

"Aren't you forgetting someone?" Cortez asked sternly. "… Sir."

"Fine," Shepard grumbled.

"So how are Tali and Legion holding up?" Joker resumed.

"Tali's staying on the surface for a while. Legion's dead."

"Wow. Really?" exclaimed Joker. "You mean he stopped functioning? Blew a gasket? What?" he began before noticing the look EDI was giving him. "Okaaaay… getting some major stinkeye here."

"He's _dead_," Shepard reiterated. "He disseminated himself for the good of the collective. It's my belief he achieved true sentience before his death, so no, Joker, he did _not _just_ '_blow a gasket'. He did something that mattered. He'll be remembered as a hero."

Joker sighed, pausing for a beat before replying, imagining Shepard was wearing his angry face right about now. "Understood, Commander. Joker out."

~o~O~o~

**Captain's Cabin, early the following morning**

Shepard awoke with a start, his heart thudding rapidly in his chest. Not knowing where he was for a second, he fumbled for the light switch at his bedside and glanced to his left in a panic, seeing that Steve was lying beside him, softly snoring. His senses returning to him, he exhaled and concentrated on controlling his breathing, not wanting to wake his partner. "Damn," he sighed, the adrenaline that had surged through him slowly ebbing away.

He'd dreamed about the boy again. Why? Was this his mind's idea of a sick joke? A way to make him feel guilty for not saving the child, as if he needed to be reminded of that, and of all the others he'd failed to save?

He stared up at the ceiling, annoyed with himself for letting these dreams to get to him. And then, as happened so often, he thought of Ash, Mordin, Thane, Legion and everyone else he'd lost during his tenure as the Normandy's captain.

And people called him a hero.

He allowed himself to wallow in guilt and melancholy for a minute or two before deciding enough was enough, and he reached for Steve's hand, which was splayed across his chest.

"Ad'm?" Cortez mumbled, shifting slightly. Shepard sat up, gently draping Steve's arm over his pillow.

"It's okay. Go back to sleep," he whispered, leaning down and kissing Steve on the forehead. He then waited a minute until Steve's breathing had slowed before pushing himself up and sitting on the edge of the bed.

A glance at the bedside clock told him it was just after 4am, and he knew there was no point trying to get back to sleep. He'd just toss and turn, wake Steve, and would then be tetchy for the rest of the morning. No, better he start the day with a clear head.

He stood and shrugged on some slacks and a hoodie before heading for the bathroom, where he splashed his face with water and relieved himself. Then, checking that Steve was still asleep, he grabbed his laptop and left the cabin.

~o~O~o~

**Port Observation Lounge**

Abby had finally become accustomed to sleeping on a bed again, and a very comfortable one at that. Having spent much of the last two years sleeping on the ground or – on rare occasions, on a very ornate and beautiful bed in a royal residence that actually felt like sleeping on rubble – her weary bones had found a home in this wonderful bed, which looked basic but felt like a cloud.

The trouble was, her new-found love of luxurious furnishings had coincided with her experience on Eden Prime, and sleep had so far eluded her.

She'd climbed out of bed, knelt beside it and given thanks to the Maker for everything – her deliverance from death, her new friends and, it seemed, her new life. She had a lot to be grateful for, and needed to acknowledge that. The growing unease and edginess she'd experienced since returning from the planet was simply settling-in jitters, nerves or overheating of her blood, she told herself. Perhaps the food aboard the Normandy was a little too rich for her, and she needed more time to adjust.

Yes, she had a lot to be grateful for, she reminded herself as she snuggled down, hugging a pillow tightly to her chest. She closed her eyes, filling her mind with thoughts of her new friends, James in particular, and the Maker's love. Contented and spiritually replete, she drifted off, her body relaxing as sleep found her at last.

She awoke some time later, unsure of the hour but, as she was comfortable, she made no attempt to move. A small itch on her leg troubled her, though, and she tried without success to scratch it with her opposite foot. Annoyed that she'd have to leave her cocoon, she pushed herself up and reached down with her hand, recoiling when it made contact with something smooth and hard. Her breathing quickening at the unknown sensation, she tentatively ran her hand along it, finding it covered much of her lower leg.

"EDI? Would you bring the lights up, please?" she asked, waiting for a response that never came. "EDI?" she called again more hesitantly, unsure whether the ship's AI was given downtime like the rest of the crew. She reached for the small panel at her bedside, pressing it several times to no avail.

"What's happened to the lights?" she asked herself, and pushed the covers off her legs, straining to see in the pale light of the star field above her window. She swung her legs off the bed, stopping dead when her feet made a loud _thud _as they touched the floor.

"What–?" Her breath caught in her throat and she felt sweat bathe her. Something was terribly wrong but, too afraid to look down at her feet, she sat still, her heartbeat and breathing loud in her ears, all her senses on full alert as her eyes adjusted to the darkness. After several long minutes she dared to look down and immediately looked back up again, her heart leaping as it seemed her lower legs were covered by a dark, shiny film, which was slowly creeping upwards.

"EDI?" she asked again, and gasped as she spoke in a voice that was not her own. "What's happ –" she began, her voice deep, harsh and unnatural, and she raised her hands to her face, leaping up as cold, hard metal touched her cheeks. She went to run for the door but her movements were slow, jerky and cumbersome, her joints protesting under the crushing weight of her new metallic body. Racked with pain, she collapsed to the floor, no longer able to hold herself up.

The floor opened up beneath her and she frantically crawled away from the gaping maw of fire, machinery and death that threatened to consume her, barely able to drag herself along the floor, finally reaching the vanity and its large mirror, a mechanical rattle leaving her mouth as she gasped for the air she no longer needed.

She hauled herself up next to the mirror, forcing herself to look at what she'd become. Then, all doubts were driven from her mind, because she knew with certainty that the face of a dead god was looking back at her. And, in that moment, she knew _them_.

She _became _them.

She opened her mouth to scream, an ear-splitting, cacophonous foghorn tearing through her and out of her, so profound and forceful that for a second she forgot who she was.

"Noooo!" she wailed, blindly thrashing her arms as she clawed at the wall in front of her. "Where are the lights? Where are the lights? Please! Somebody help me!"

The lights in her quarters came on and she scooted into a corner, her eyes huge as she wildly slapped her arms and legs, which were once again made of flesh.

"Abby?" EDI asked. "Are you all right?"

"No!" she yelled, her breath coming out in gasps as she looked around and remembered where she was, _who _she was. "No! I mean… I-I'm fine, EDI. I th-think. I… _am_ I all right? Do I look normal to you? Tell me the truth!"

"Physically, you appear unchanged since the last time we spoke, but you seem to be quite distressed," observed the AI. "Should I call Dr. Chakwas or Commander Shepard? Both are awake."

"No! There's no need for that," Abby gulped, her heart rate finally slowing. "I-I'm fine, EDI, really."

"If I may make an observation, you do not appear to be 'fine'."

"I just… I had a nightmare, that's all. Something silly," Abby claimed with a hollow, insincere laugh, once again checking her arms and legs. "Look at me, a grown woman, getting all het up over a bad dream."

A short pause followed before EDI spoke again. "If you wish, I will bring this platform to the Port Observation Lounge. I have noticed that some organics seek out company during times of emotional upset, while others draw strength from solitude. I would be pleased to sit and converse with you if you require it."

Abby sighed, touched by the supposedly emotionless AI's concern. She stood up on shaky legs, smoothing her rumpled night gown. "You're so kind to offer, EDI, but I think I'll be all right. I just need a little time to collect myself, that's all. It really was nothing."

"Very well. This platform is available should you change your mind."

Abby moved to her bed, sitting heavily upon it. "Thank you, EDI. And for being a good friend."

"You are welcome, Abby. Do you require further assistance?"

Abby flopped back on the bed and stared out at the stars. "No. Thank you again."

"Would you like me to decrease the light level?"

"Um… not just yet. I'll take care of it. Goodnight, EDI."

"Goodnight, Abby."

~o~O~o~

Shepard entered the Mess and looked around. There were a few crew members in there, night shift workers who were taking their breaks, and they looked up as their commander sat down at an empty table. "Morning, all," he mumbled around a yawn.

"Good morning, sir," they replied before returning to their reading or eating.

Shepard liked the Mess at this time of night. The lighting was dimmed, and the very atmosphere seemed different. It wasn't unusual for Shepard to wander into the Mess during the night, and any crew there always left him alone. They seemed to respect that this was Shepard's quiet time, and kept any non-urgent issues to themselves until the day shift began.

He unfolded his lap top and booted it up, waiting a minute until his saved information on the latest fleet deployments appeared. He then headed for the kitchen and made himself a coffee.

On the way back to his seat, a small movement near the elevator caught his eye before it was gone again. He paused for a few seconds, wondering why whoever it was hadn't entered the Mess. Not convinced he was seeing things, he set his coffee down next to his laptop and rounded the corner, a little startled when he found Abby, dressed only in a thin night gown, standing next to the elevator and staring into space.

"Abby?" he said softly, not wanting to frighten her. She quickly turned around, plastering a smile on her face, but not before Shepard had caught the fleeting, haunted look in her eyes.

"Oh, Adam! I was just going for a walk to clear my head. What brings you down here? Well, not that you need to explain yourself to me, but you know what I mean."

He nodded, watching her carefully. "I know what you mean. Looks like you're an early bird, same as me," he said with an easy smile.

"Well, you are my nephew. Sort of," she joked, her smile appearing perfectly genuine, although there was an indefinable dullness to her eyes, which Shepard wasn't sure was because of the lighting or something else.

"Want some coffee?" he asked, thumbing towards the Mess.

"Oh, no, thank you. I've never quite acquired the taste for it. A little bitter for me."

"Tea, then?"

"No, I'm fine, really. I should go back to bed. I'll only be cross in the morning if I don't get enough sleep."

"Now I _know _we're related," he laughed. "I won't keep you, then. You know, if you're having trouble sleeping, headaches, bad dreams, anything like that, Dr. Chakwas would be happy to help out."

"I know that," she assured him, her smile fixed in place.

"And I'm here if ever you need to talk about anything, or if you're bored at night. I'm always up early."

"I will certainly avail myself of your and Dr. Chakwas's generosity should the need arise," she replied smoothly. "Goodnight, Adam."

"Goodnight," he replied, watching her until she'd entered her quarters. He remained where he was for a short time and then returned to the Mess, noticing that Dr. Chakwas, another night owl, was also up.

Upon entering sick bay, he was greeted by the doctor, who invited him to sit down. "Having trouble sleeping again?" she asked, taking a seat opposite.

He shook his head. "Nothing I can't handle. You?"

She arched an eyebrow. "Let me ask the questions, Commander. _Are_ you all right, or is this a social call? Because I really don't think I can handle Serrice Ice Brandy at this hour."

He gave a brief grunt of laughter before frowning and coming straight to the point. "Doctor, did your examination of Abby upon our return from Eden Prime show anything unusual? Any anomalies?"

"Apart from heightened adrenaline and cortisol levels – which I expected considering her experience – I found nothing of concern," she answered. "Why do you ask?"

"But that's exactly what you said to me after I activated the beacon on Eden Prime – 'nothing of concern'. And yet I was plagued for weeks by nightmares and feelings of impending doom, even before I had the cipher and knew what the hell it was I'd seen."

"You're concerned for Abby," Chakwas guessed. "Has something happened?"

"I'm not sure… she seems all right on the surface, but I get the feeling her parents taught her more than combat skills. She's an accomplished diplomat and is very good at hiding her true feelings. I could be wrong, but I think she might be struggling. I'm wary of pushing her, though, because I remember feeling antsy around that time myself."

Chakwas sat back in her chair, crossing one leg over the other. "Your symptoms improved once you'd received the cipher, isn't that correct?"

He shook his head, his disapproval clear. "I know what you're suggesting, but I'm not sure Abby's ready to assimilate absolute knowledge of the Reapers and what they represent. She's heard things about them, but I've instructed my senior staff not to go into too much detail. She's only just getting a handle on our world as it is."

"But receiving the cipher gave you a purpose, Commander. It made sense of your vision. Once you had it, there was no stopping you. You were completely focused."

"Yes, it did give me a purpose, but that was because no one believed me. I'm way too pig-headed to let anybody tell me 'no' or 'you're wrong'. Abby won't _have _the fight I did. All she'll have is this terrible knowledge with no outlet for it. My attempts to get the Council and even the Alliance to see the truth took my mind off of the worst of it. She won't have that."

Chakwas thought about that for a moment before nodding. "You could be right, Commander. _I'm_ certainly not going to tell you you're wrong, pig-headed as you are."

He managed a half-hearted smile. "You're one of very few people on board who _can _tell me I'm wrong, and I'll actually listen to. Am I? Is it right to keep her in the dark?"

"Right or wrong, I agree with you about not giving her the cipher – for now, at least," said Chakwas. "Although I'm afraid I don't know what the alternative is."

"Unless _I _tell her about the Reapers. They're not a mystery anymore, and we know as much about them now as we'll ever know. Maybe another person explaining it will be better than having it all enter her head in a rush."

"Not just 'another person', Commander. _You_," she smiled, patting his arm. "Abby's a remarkable woman and I'm certain she'll take the news in her stride."

"She will," Shepard replied thoughtfully," but will that knowledge stop the nightmares? I'm still having them even now, although they're nothing like they used to be. Right after I activated the beacon, they were terrifying. If Abby's going through the same thing…"

"Shepard," EDI said, joining the conversation, "I find myself experiencing a moral dilemma. I have information pertinent to your discussion, but I do not wish to be indiscreet."

"Did something happen?" Shepard asked. "Did Abby have a nightmare just now?"

"That is one possibility. I am hesitant to disclose full details without her consent."

Shepard nodded. "I think I can read between the lines. I appreciate the heads-up, EDI. And you were perfectly discreet."

"Yes, thank you, EDI," Chakwas echoed, her expression serious. "Why don't you talk to Abby later today, Commander, and we'll keep a close eye on her. I'll visit her for a chat and then we'll see if anything comes out. It could be that she doesn't want to trouble you with anything – she's acutely aware of the burdens already placed upon you."

Shepard nodded again and began to rise from his chair. "Sounds good, Doc. I'll talk to her over breakfast. Thanks for the advice."

She stood up and saw him to the door. "I don't suppose you'll go back to bed for a couple of hours?" she asked with mock sternness.

"Will you?"

"Don't be absurd!" she scoffed. "There's far too much to do."

"Yeah," he mumbled before returning to his laptop.

**Later that morning**

Shepard arrived at Abby's quarters, breakfast tray in hand, and pressed the entry sensor. He waited a minute, and was surprised when she came to the door instead of calling out her permission to enter.

"Morning, Abby. Again," he said with a smile, which she returned. "I hope I'm not disturbing you, but I thought I'd bring breakfast. We haven't had much chance to talk lately."

"How thoughtful of you," she said kindly, stepping aside to allow him entry. "Of course you're not disturbing me. I'm honoured you've taken time out of your busy day to spend time with me."

"Well, the quarian and geth situation is all but taken care of, so I'm no busier than usual," he replied, setting the tray down on a table, and Abby invited him to sit. As he did so, he observed that her bed was unmade and that thecarpet near the nightstand was stained by a spillage of some kind, which had been mopped up. Abby, though, was immaculately presented as usual.

"You must think me frightfully messy," she blurted, quickly walking to the bed and straightening it up. "I'm afraid I fell asleep in the chair after we spoke earlier. I awoke only a short time ago and thought I'd better make myself presentable. I didn't have time to tidy up in here."

"Can't say I noticed," he said nonchalantly.

"No, not until I drew attention to it," she laughed, returning to the seating area and sitting down opposite Shepard, her hands neatly folded in her lap, her posture dead straight.

"Did you manage to catch up on your sleep?" he asked, briefly glancing at the dark shadows beneath her eyes before pouring them both a cup of tea.

"Oh, yes. I suppose you have been up and about since then?"

"I have, but I got a lot done, which leaves me with a little free time. I've been meaning to talk to you."

"Oh?" she asked slightly nervously, taking her cup of tea from Shepard with a gracious smile.

"Well, as the Normandy's business in this sector is pretty much concluded, I thought we could take a look at the asteroids where the Fereldan artefacts were found. We're actually on our way there now."

She nodded, taking a sip of tea. "I see."

He sighed and set his cup down. "I'm sorry to just drop that on you. I didn't want to give you false hope while I was dealing with the quarians so I didn't mention it. But that's done, and I'm hoping we can finally find some answers for you, Abby."

"Oh, I didn't mean… I'm sorry. Please don't take my reaction for ingratitude or any –"

"Abby." He leaned forward and touched her arm, keeping his voice soft. "I get it. This is _big_."

"It is," she agreed, looking at her lap.

"Are you ready for this?" he asked, settling back in his chair, "because we might not find the answers you wanted. But I'm sure you're more than aware of that."

She looked up at him, her weariness apparent in every curve and hollow of her face, though her voice was steady. "I'm prepared. I know it's no longer the place I remember."

"You've been through a lot in your young life," he commented, feeling a surge of empathy and affection for her.

"So have you."

He cleared his throat. "Would you like some bacon?" he asked, taking two small plates off the tray and passing Abby some cutlery.

"Thank you. That would be lovely."

They ate quietly except for the occasional banal remark about Abby's quarters or the quality of their meal. They'd almost finished when Joker contacted Shepard. "Got the Tikkun asteroid field on sensors, Commander."

"Copy that, Joker. What's our ETA?"

"Forty-one minutes to the edge, but I recommend having Cortez take you the rest of the way."

"Why's that?"

"There's a lot of debris out there, Commander. Wouldn't want to scratch up the new Alliance paintjob."

"Got it. Shepard out." He activated his omni-tool. "Steve? We'll be departing slightly earlier than planned. Think you can have her ready in about 40 minutes?"

"She's ready now, sir. Standing by."

He smiled softly. "I should have known. Well done. James, Liara, EDI. Shuttle bay in 40 minutes."

His crew acknowledged his orders and he deactivated his omni-tool, returning his attention to Abby. "I'm bringing all the experts along for this one," he told her with a smile. "Liara the archaeologist, EDI the analyst and me… well, because I'm a nosy bastard."

She chuckled, then, and the sparkle in her eyes told Shepard it was genuine. "And how about James?" she teased.

"He'll be providing the eye candy."

"Oh, my Maker!" she shrieked, clapping her hands together, and Shepard laughed along with her. "You are such a wag! I'll have you know that some consider James's features to be quite distinguished."

"That's one way of putting it," he joked.

Still smiling, she shook her head reproachfully. "Adam Shepard, I renew my reservations over your status as a gentleman."

He beckoned her closer and she leaned in. "A word to the wise – don't waste your energy debating whether I'm a gentleman or not. I'm a grade-A scoundrel."

"I'm beginning to think that's true," she laughed, and Adam stood up, offering a hand to her.

"Why don't we find out what our illustrious lieutenants are up to in the shuttle bay? I know how much you like hanging out down there."

She took his hand and allowed herself to be gently pulled up. "Oh dear. Hanging around with the men in the shuttle bay? That makes me sound quite… 'fast'."

"Yeah, probably, but we scoundrels don't care about things like that. I accept you, Abby, loose morals and all," he solemnly vowed, before a slight quirk of an eyebrow gave him away.

She smiled again, bowing her head. "Would you think me terrible if I… oh, to the Void with it," she said, winding her arms around Shepard's waist and tightly hugging him. He brought his arms around her back and patted her shoulder a few times before releasing her. "Thank you, Adam," she smiled up at him. "You've really lifted my spirits."

"Glad to help," he replied, gesturing to the door, refraining from asking exactly why her spirits had been low.

They walked to the elevator, her arm through his, and the bright smile she gave him as they stepped inside told him that this was _not _the best time to talk to her about the Reapers. It would have to wait for another time.

"Let's go hang out with the men in the shuttle bay," he said with a grin.

"Yes, let's," she agreed, squeezing his arm. "Shuttle bay please, EDI."


	13. Home

**Home**

"Entering the asteroid field, Commander," said Cortez, bringing up several screens of information. "I have Uriyah and Etiel on sensors."

Shepard took a seat in the co-pilot's chair and examined the screens. "What have you got?"

"Extremely hostile conditions on Etiel, which'll present a challenge to any landing parties. My recommendation is to leave well enough alone, unless you need to gather data. There's nothing down there – no discernible landmarks or buildings, anyway. Eclipse did a thorough job of looting the place."

"What about Uriyah?" Liara asked from out back.

"Uriyah has very low atmospheric pressure, gravity is 0.165G and surface temperatures average minus 27 degrees Fahrenheit – nothing your suits can't handle. I can land us well away from any storm fronts or adverse weather systems."

"I'm sorry, I didn't understand the first part of that," said Abby, who was also seated in the rear of the shuttle with Liara, EDI and James.

"It just means the air's thin and the gravity's out of whack," James explained, "but you'll have a breather mask and your boots will automatically adjust. It'll feel a little weird at first, and you won't be able to walk very fast or run, but you'll get the hang of it. Just follow my lead," he said with a wink, and she nodded, feeling more at ease.

"Anything of interest down there?" Shepard asked Steve.

"I'm reading several landmarks and possible points of interest. I'll need to get closer to the surface to run full scans."

"Take us there," Shepard directed.

"Yes, Commander," answered Cortez, changing course, and Shepard leaned closer to the screens for a better look.

"What about the warning buoys?"

"We have the standard Alliance buoys which warn us not to cross the geth border, plus some others around Uriyah only, which are definitely _not_ Alliance – too old. Maybe quarian? They warn of…" Cortez paused and turned back to the others. "Abby, this might be difficult for you to hear."

"I appreciate your concern, Steve," she replied, forcing a thin smile. "I'm prepared for the worst. Please go ahead."

Steve faced the screens and gave a quiet sigh. "I'll read exactly what it says. 'This body is rendered uninhabitable and hazardous due to the presence of an unidentified mutagen. Organic life forms are advised to bypass this body in order to avoid potentially lethal exposure. If avoidance is not possible, all necessary life-preserving measures should be taken'."

"'_Organic_ life forms'?" Shepard repeated. "That doesn't sound quarian to me."

"I wonder if the geth left the buoys?" Cortez asked.

"It's possible. If my time in the geth consensus proved anything, it's how little we understand the geths' intentions toward organics. Any more details, Steve?"

"Yes, sir. According to whoever left the warning buoys, the planet used to enjoy a temperate climate but an 'event' – which is not explained here – almost destroyed its eco system. The core of the planet has been slowly cooling and eventually will freeze. There's still a very rudimentary eco system in place, but for all intents and purposes… well, the planet's dead. I'm sorry, Abby," he said over his shoulder.

She nodded silently and James, seated next to her, rested a hand on her back. "Commander," she ventured quietly, "do you remember when I told you about the darkspawn disease – the taint?"

"I do."

She rose and moved to the cockpit, Shepard immediately standing up, but she held up a hand and shook her head. "Well, I'm immune to it. If Steve could 'drop me off', I could ascertain whether or not the Blight was responsible for what happened to the planet."

"No," Shepard answered immediately. "First, we don't know for certain what happened down there. Second, I thought you and your companions ended the Blight?"

"We did," she said softly, her eyes cast down. "But that was the fifth Blight – there were four which preceded it. The taint destroys land, people, animals, crops and it lingers so nothing else can ever grow again on infected land. Perhaps… perhaps there was a sixth Blight, one that ended everything."

"That would certainly explain how the planet's eco system was all but destroyed," Liara added solemnly. "But wouldn't some darkspawn still remain?"

"It was said that there were seven Old Gods," Abby said quietly and partly to herself. "Perhaps, after the sixth Blight, the darkspawn died out without the population of Thedas to sustain them."

"What do you mean?" Shepard asked.

"The darkspawn came from the people themselves – humans, elves and dwarves were corrupted by the darkspawns' filth and turned into the very monsters they feared."

"Just like the Reapers," Shepard commented in disgust.

"Abby needs to know what happened, Commander," James said firmly. "Wouldn't we want to if it was Earth or Thessia or wherever? We need to find out, whatever the dangers are."

"That's why we're here, James. EDI. I want you to conduct scans of the planet's surface. Then we'll know if it's safe for the rest of us to set foot down there."

"An excellent idea, Shepard," the AI agreed, activating her omni-tool. "I have Abby's DNA and blood maps on file. I will run comparisons to determine whether any agents on the planet's surface correlate with them."

"Now orbiting Uriyah," Cortez announced.

"Take her down, Steve," Shepard ordered. "I want a level one bio screen in place over the hatch before it's opened."

Cortez quickly nodded and touched a couple of panels. "Bio screen is up. We'll be there in three minutes."

Abby returned to her seat next to James and the remainder of the trip was conducted in thoughtful silence, though James watched her carefully. Steve quickly and cleanly landed the Kodiak, and EDI waited next to the hatch. "Attenuating exosuit to low-gravity conditions," she called to Cortez. "I am ready."

"Opening hatch."

By now, all occupants of the shuttle save Cortez were on their feet. The hatch went up and EDI stepped through the bio field and hopped out, walking a short distance before crouching down, her omni-tool glowing.

Shepard, James and Liara stood with Abby as she took in the bleak, featureless landscape, all casting discreet glances her way.

"You okay?" Shepard quietly asked her.

She stared blankly ahead, no emotion registering on her face. "This is not my home," she mumbled, a frown forming. "I don't recognise this place at all."

"Shepard," Steve said from the cockpit, and the commander re-took the co-pilot's seat while he and Cortez held a whispered conversation.

"Scans complete," EDI reported from outside. "I have discovered trace elements of an unidentified agent which is present in a sample of the dust on the planet's surface. This agent is also present in Abby's blood and DNA. I have accessed several hundred other human DNA and blood maps belonging to the Normandy crew and other sources, none of which contain the agent. It is quite possibly unique."

"No, it's not unique, EDI," Abby said, sounding weary. "It's the taint." She wandered back to her seat and sat down heavily, James firmly at her side. She stared out of the hatch, not even noticing that EDI was on her way back. "This really _is_ my home, then."

"Damn, I'm sorry," James commiserated.

"Thank you." She leaned against him, unable to vocalise her feelings. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders while Liara sat on the bench opposite.

Shepard then entered the rear of the shuttle and assisted EDI to climb aboard. "Does this taint pose a danger to the rest of us, EDI?" he asked.

"Negative. While the agent found here matches that in Abby's chemistry, it is dormant. I would hypothesise that the lack of a diverse eco-system on the planet has rendered the agent harmless. There was insufficient life to sustain or nourish it."

Shepard nodded. "So organics are safe on the surface?"

"Correct."

"I appreciate the help, EDI," Shepard said before crouching in front of Abby. "Steve's completed his scan of the planet and discovered some ruins several klicks north of here. We can be there in about ten minutes."

"Thank you," she replied with an effort. "Does he know what the ruins are?"

"I can't say for certain," Steve answered from the cockpit, "but it looks like it could be the remains of a city or large town. There are remnants of a very large dwelling up on a hill, and hundreds of smaller settlements further down, spread out over a wide area."

"A large dwelling on a hill? That sounds like Redcliffe or Denerim," she said thoughtfully. "Can you tell if there was a lake nearby? Redcliffe was situated on the shore of Lake Calenhad."

"No local bodies of water except for the ocean. It looks like our town was situated near the coast."

Her stomach knotted as she remembered her coastal home of Highever, but that was not built on a hill, and she was almost certain she knew which city Steve was referring to. "I know this is a strange question, but… what color is the rock the town was formed on? Can you tell me that?"

"Sure," Steve answered as he brought up the information. "Let's see… quartz, feldspar… yep. Granite. Pale brown, actually, more like beige, according to my readout."

"Not red or salmon-colored?"

"No, Abby. Definitely beige."

She took a slow, deep breath and glanced at James. "It sounds like Denerim."

"That's where Alistair was made king, right?" asked James.

"You remembered."

"Of course I did. All that stuff you told me about's important to you."

"Ready to go?" Shepard gently interjected.

"I'm ready. Thank you."

Shepard pushed himself up and took his seat beside Steve as the Kodiak headed towards the ruins.

~o~O~o~

Steve landed the Kodiak at the foot of the hill, remaining on board as the others disembarked. They found themselves in a wide clearing which was surrounded by burned-out husks of small buildings. The crumbling remains of a stone wall circled the settlement, and a heavy wrought iron gate lay redundantly on the frozen ground not far from their position.

"That's the gate to the Alienage!" Abby exclaimed, surging forward as best she could in her mag-boots.

"Let's split into teams," Shepard said. "Abby with James, EDI with Liara. See what you can find. I'll take the perimeter. Steve, continue your scans. Everyone keep an open comm."

"Right away, Shepard," Liara replied as Shepard began to climb to higher ground, where he followed the stone wall, scanning with his omni-tool.

"This is definitely Denerim, then, Abby?" he asked.

"Yes. We're standing in Denerim Market," she replied over the comm. "Hundreds, maybe thousands, of people once lived around here. Up on the hill is… well, it's where the palace used to be."

"You mentioned the Alienage. What's that?" James asked.

"Well, when I told you that mages were locked away from the rest of society, the same held true of the elves."

"Why?"

"I don't know," she sighed as she and James stepped over the gate and into what was left of the Alienage. "They were considered second-class citizens. Places like this were deemed necessary to avoid strife between the elves and humans, but I found them distasteful. So did Alistair. He was always saying he wanted to do something about… oh, dear Maker…"

"Abby?" Shepard called.

"Holy shit," James muttered. "Is that who I think it is?"

"James? What is going on?" Shepard demanded.

"Found something interesting, Commander. You might wanna come take a look."

"On my way."

When Shepard reached the Alienage he found Abby and James standing next to a large, badly-tarnished bronze statue, which was missing its head. Although time and the elements had eroded the statue, it was clearly of a human male, who stood in a heroic pose, a shield in one hand and a broken sword in the other.

Shepard approached and looked up at the statue for a moment before he squatted to read the faded inscription at its base. "'Alistair Theirin, King of Ferelden, scourge of the Blight, champion of the elves and all other oppressed folk of Thedas. Here stands our tribute so that we, and future generations, will always remember and continue to pay tribute to him. Now he rests at the Maker's side, residing in the One True Kingdom. We will never forget'."

Shepard slowly stood up but remained where he was, waiting for Abby to speak. She said nothing, however, and James left her side, approaching Shepard. "Commander, let's take a look around."

"Good idea," replied Shepard, and both men split up while they conducted a brief search. Before long, Shepard found what they were looking for. "Here," he called out, having located the statue's head. Due to the low gravity he lifted it with ease, carrying it to the base of the statue. Fortunately, it just was heavy enough to be set down without floating away. After another, unsuccessful search for the missing part of Alistair's sword, they returned to Abby's side.

"Thank you," she said sincerely to them both and crouched next to the head, tenderly touching its broken crown.

"He was a good looking guy," Shepard commented, and James nodded his agreement. "And a hero to the elves, by the sound of it."

"I'm so proud of you, Alistair," she said with emotion in her voice as she stood up. "And to think, you were raised by dogs. Look what you accomplished."

"Raised by dogs?" James chuckled softly and moved to her side, taking one of her hands and looking down at the bronze head. "Thanks for takin' good care of her, man. Uh… Your Highness. Is that right?" he asked Abby, who managed a laugh.

"No, but it doesn't matter. He would have insisted you call him Alistair. He would have loved you, James. And he would have been a little in awe of you, Adam, but would have jabbered on about you incessantly when you weren't there. He was a big kid at heart."

"Sounds like that big kid got a hell of a lot done," said the commander.

"Yeah," James agreed. "Abby? Shouldn't there be something around here about you? You did kill a dragon."

"I don't really care about that," she replied evenly before sighing. "It's comforting, in a strange sort of way, that Alistair endured way beyond Ferelden itself. It gladdens my heart to know he wasn't forgotten."

At that moment, EDI and Liara entered the Alienage, and they spent a few minutes with Abby as she showed them the statue.

"Did you find anything?" Shepard asked the new arrivals.

"Nothing of note," Liara replied, "except we are yet to encounter any human remains. I find that very surprising."

"There are no remains because the darkspawn and their taint would have consumed everything," Abby explained in a grave tone. "And then, when there was nothing left, the darkspawn themselves would have perished. I just hope Fergus and Alistair didn't live to see it happen."

For a short while, no one spoke, each member of the party entertaining their own thoughts. Eventually, Abby broke the silence. "There was a Warden vault nearby. Could we take a look? I don't hold out much hope that anything remains of it, but…"

"Lead the way, Abby," Shepard invited.

Much to Abby's disappointment, the site where the Warden vault once stood was now a small crater, with nothing left to indicate it had ever existed. She stood at the lip of the crater, shaking her head, James and Shepard flanking her.

"What was kept in the vault?" asked Shepard.

"Records, artifacts, all kinds of treasures," she said sadly. "Thousands of years reduced to nothing. It pains me to see this. The Grey Wardens enjoyed a long, rich heritage and now… now it's all gone." She hung her head and sighed. "Unless Alistair moved the contents of the vault somewhere. But we'll never know, will we?"

"I may be able to help with that, Commander," Cortez said over the comm.

"What have you found, Steve?"

"Scans indicate a series of tunnels running beneath the site of the palace. There are several small rooms leading off them which might have been cells or guard barracks. There's also a much larger room which has six-inch thick walls made of lead. Could be the palace vault. I'm not saying the Grey Warden stuff will be there, but it might be worth checking out."

"Thank you, Steve," Abby replied. "Maybe I'll find some of Alistair's belongings there, if nothing else."

"Sending the navpoint to you now," said Cortez. "You'll need to go up the hill. There's a trail which starts a couple hundred metres to the east."

"I see it," EDI confirmed. "Navpoint received."

"There's something else," Cortez added. "Abby, this should interest you."

"What is it?" she asked.

"There's a _huge_ statue in the palace grounds. Some of it's broken, but I think it might be of you. It's a depiction of a woman in battledress slaying a dragon."

"Yes! I _knew_ it!" James cheered. "Way to go, Alistair!"

She bowed her head, feeling one of James's large hands at her back. "Looks like he didn't forget about you, either," he said softly.

"No," she murmured, looking up at him, their eyes meeting.

"Sorry I didn't warn you about the statue of Alistair," Steve went on. "I didn't realise who it was. If I'd known –"

"There's nothing to apologize for," she replied, still holding James's gaze. "You have been a wonderful help. All of you have," she said, turning to the others. "This whole experience has been made so much easier knowing I have such dear friends at my side. Thank you."

"You're welcome," Shepard said warmly, and his companions nodded.

"This way," EDI instructed and, following her directions, they reached the top of the hill a short time later. EDI entered the structure through a window, while the rest stopped to catch their breath and admire the ruins of the palace, the lower half of which was largely intact.

"They don't build 'em like that anymore," said Shepard, shaking his head in admiration.

"You actually spent time here?" James exclaimed, letting out a whistle when Abby nodded in confirmation. "You slept here? _Ate_ here?"

"Yes, all of those things," she smiled before a wistful look came into her eyes. "I wish you could have seen it in all its glory." She glanced up at the sky above the palace, her smile returning. "The Royal Standard snapping in the breeze… the king's heralds, dressed in their finery, announcing his arrival with bugles…" She laughed to herself before looking at James.

"That sounds pretty damned amazing," he whispered, something in his eyes she'd never seen before.

"It was. I wish you could have been there." She held his gaze for a moment longer before they heard Shepard and Liara step away from them, and they turned back to look at the palace.

"Abby!" EDI called from inside. "I have a visual on the statue! It is very lifelike!"

"Come on!" James exclaimed excitedly, and he and Shepard assisted the ladies through a window. They soon found EDI, who was standing next to the entrance to the palace courtyard. She didn't need to point the statue out to them, as it dominated their view.

"I have studied the plaque at its base," the AI told them as their eyes went upward. "It says, 'Abigail Cousland, Hero of Ferelden, Urthemiel's bane'."

"Whoa!" yelled James, moving outside to the far side of the statue and looking up. "That is one badass señorita! Take that, you son of a bitch!" he said to the dragon, which was being stabbed in the heart by a representation of Abby. "Or is it just 'bitch'?" he asked her.

"The Old Gods were believed to be male, but they were born of no mother," she clarified.

"Oh, okay, then," James shrugged before looking up at the dragon again. "Take that, you bastard!"

"Was the dragon really that big?" Liara asked, her eyes wide.

"No, it was bigger," Abby answered with a grin, and Shepard burst out laughing. Abby then walked to James's side, where he was checking out Statue Abby.

"Nice legs for a thousand year-old chick. Just sayin'," he said with a cheeky grin.

"They're not too bad, I suppose," she mused, "but my breasts aren't _that_ big! I would fall over if I was really built like that!"

"Now come on," James argued. "You gotta allow for artistic license an' all. They're _heroically _big."

"They certainly are," Liara added, smiling.

"Will you kindly stop talking about how heroic my breasts are?" Abby squirmed, self-consciously crossing her arms and laughing along with the others.

"I believe _you_ were the one who made the initial observation, Abby," EDI teased.

"Yeah, in other words, you started it," said James, and Abby thumped his arm.

"All right, everyone," a smiling Shepard interrupted. "EDI, did you find the entrance to the tunnels?"

"Yes. It is through here." She led them all to what appeared to have been a banqueting hall and walked to some rotting wood panelling on one wall. "There are several entrances to the tunnels, but this is the nearest."

Omni-tools glowing, the party examined the wooden panelling, searching for an entrance. "I think I've found something," Liara called out, and the others joined her. "Yes, it is a very simple mechanism." She pushed against a small, protruding piece of the wood, and one of the panels swung open. "A secret passage. How romantic."

Shepard activated his flashlight and stepped inside. "There are winding steps going down," he informed the others. "Be careful, they're pretty narrow on the left side. Steve, you reading us? We're heading underground."

"I read you, Commander. Be careful down there."

"Roger that."

Everyone activated their flashlights and Shepard led them down the steps. "This way," EDI said once they'd reached the bottom, pointing ahead. "Take care. The ground is uneven."

They walked past numerous small rooms, all containing bunks, storage chests and a few rusty weapons. "Looks like you were right, Steve," Shepard said. "This appears to be the guard barracks."

"The vault, if that's what it is, is approximately 400 metres ahead of you to the south," replied Cortez. "It's also below you. I'm reading a large steel door at the end of the tunnel you're in, which opens to another set of steps leading down."

"Copy that. Let's move, people."

"You ever been down here, Abby?" James asked quietly from the rear.

"No. I doubt even Alistair knew of the existence of these tunnels until he was crowned. If he _ever _knew about them, that is."

"We'll find out soon enough," said Shepard.

Shortly, they reached the door Steve had told them about and paused as EDI examined it. "I am unfamiliar with this type of lock. It is undoubtedly ancient, but quite intricate in its design. Scanning…"

"Just a minute, EDI," Abby said, stepping forward. She bent slightly and shone her flashlight on the lock. "This is a five-pin tumbler lock. I can pick it. I used to be quite good at things like this."

"That will not be nec –" EDI began, but Shepard caught her eye and shook his head.

"We'd appreciate that," he said, recognizing her need to feel useful.

Abby glanced around, examining the ground nearby. "I just need… oh, why didn't I bring my lock picking tools with me?"

"What do you need?" James asked.

"A long, thin piece of metal, like a hairpin, plus, well… something similar but with a handle or grip so I can apply torque to the lock. I doubt any of those are just lying around here."

"Well, I got my tuning tools here," said James, removing a small belt from around the top of his arm. "I always keep 'em handy. Some of them are pretty small." He unfurled the belt on the ground and he and Abby crouched next to it. "Any good?" he asked.

"Yes… yes, I might be able to use these," she said hopefully, selecting a couple of the tiny tools. "I should warn you, though, that they might break. I promise I'll be as careful as possible."

"Knock yourself out," James replied. "Plenty more where they came from."

"All right. Would you train your light on the lock please, James?"

"Sure thing," he answered, pointing his flash light where Abby needed it, and Shepard did the same.

"This might take a while," she warned the others. "I need to concentrate."

No one uttered a word as she worked on the lock, occasionally letting slip a mild curse word or tut. After several minutes, she looked up at James and smiled. "I think I have it," she announced. With a slight twist of her wrist a loud click was heard, and she stood up, handing the intact tools back to James. "It's unlocked," she declared.

"And you didn't even break 'em. Atta girl!" he cheered.

She smiled proudly. "I might need some help to actually open it, though. It looks like it's rusted shut."

"Allow me," EDI offered, stepping forward, grabbing the edge of the door and slowly pulling it open, though it took some effort even with the superior strength of her adopted platform. James squeezed an arm and shoulder behind the other side of the door to push, and after a few minutes they'd opened it enough to allow the party to pass through.

"The big door's at the bottom of the steps," Steve announced over the comm. "I'm reading a couple of indistinct outlines down there outside the door. It's hard to tell what they are from where I am, but I know what they _look _like. I'd recommend you scan for human remains."

"Confirmed," EDI said, her omni-tool working. "Two males, one human, the other… inconclusive. The human was 32 years of age at time of death, the other approximately mid to late-forties."

"Did they kill each other?" asked Shepard.

"There is insufficient data to determine that at this time. I recommend proceeding to the lower level."

"Let's go, then," Shepard ordered.

When they reached the bottom, EDI walked ahead to two skeletons which were seated on the ground, flanking each side of a huge lead door. They were weighted down by the plate armour they wore, which was in near-pristine condition save a little rust, and their bony hands still tightly gripped the hilts of their swords.

"These are royal guards," Abby stated, joining EDI to examine them. She ran a finger along a small device on one of the men's breast plates. "Yes. This is the Theirin family emblem."

"They were guarding the vault," Shepard guessed. "They didn't leave their posts, despite everything that was going on above them."

EDI tilted her head at the readout on her omni-tool before looking at the skeleton to the left of the door. "This one is smaller, yet is not human, despite being physiologically similar to his partner. He was not a child. Bone density suggests he was in his late forties."

"He was an elf," said Abby. "They were smaller than humans, but quite similar in appearance."

"I am collating data," replied EDI. "Dr. Chakwas will find this quite interesting."

"That's an understatement," Shepard said, crouching next to the smaller skeleton. "So you were a 'second-class citizen', huh? Not from where I'm standing, soldier."

"Damn straight," James agreed. "These were brave men. They didn't try to run or nothing, but stuck it out, 'cause they sure weren't trapped down here. They should be buried with full honours. Or… whatever your people used to do, Abby."

"We must build them a pyre. They are not at rest and have earned their place at the Maker's side. Only through Andraste's purifying flame will His children return to Him."

"We'll do that," Shepard promised. "Let's take a look at what they were guarding first, then we'll head to the surface and put them to rest."

"I appreciate that, Adam," she said, dipping her head. "They should be with their families."

Shepard rose and stepped closer to the door. "EDI?"

"It is a similar lock to the one we encountered above, but the door is much heavier. However, the other door was rusted shut, and there appears to have been little moisture down here. I am confident it will open once the lock is picked." She stepped aside and looked at Abby, gesturing to the door.

"I'll need to borrow your tools again, James."

"Got 'em right here, Chula."

"Is that my new nickname?" Abby asked as she took the tools and set to work on the lock. "Because you haven't given me one yet."

"I dunno," James shrugged. "You like that one, then, Chula?"

She arched an eyebrow. "I dunno," she mimicked. "What's it mean?"

"Why don't we leave the nicknames for now and let Abby concentrate on the lock?" Shepard chided, and James nodded, unable to repress his smile as he noticed a huge grin on Abby's face.

As before, she successfully picked the lock, but this time a few of James's tuning tools were sacrificed in the process. She stepped away from the door, suddenly feeling nervous and vulnerable as EDI opened it, but she smiled gently and kept a straight posture, something she'd learned from her parents. No matter the situation, the hardship or challenge, the Couslands always maintained a façade of forbearance, and above all, they were civilized. After all, if the second most powerful family in Ferelden could not project an image of civility, how could they expect anyone else to?

She noticed James's eyes on her and gave him a nod of reassurance, which he returned, but he did not take his eyes off her as Shepard, Liara and EDI entered the vault.

"Come on, Chula," he invited softly, offering his hand. She took it and they stepped inside, their flash lights joining the others'. "Madre," he whispered as they quickly glanced around the room. "Will you look at that."

On the left side of the room several storage chests were neatly stacked, and hanging on the rear wall were dozens of magnificently-appointed swords, as well as several shields, some bearing the scars of battle, while others appeared almost newly-crafted.

On the right side were gifts and treasures from noble families and foreign royalty, all labelled and carefully arranged. Rugs, chalices, vases, statues, pieces of fine crystal and trinkets of gold were among the treasures, as well as numerous scrolls pledging soldiers, horses, land and other chattels. Abby stepped forward to examine them, recognising some of the names of noble houses stamped upon them.

"A small pocket of civilisation in a ruined land," she said quietly to herself, looking around the room, and James met her eyes, nodding his agreement.

"Abby," Shepard began, "with your permission we'll help you examine these artifacts and records. We won't damage anything, I promise."

"None of this belongs to me," she replied. "You do not need my permission. I would be very grateful for your help, as I have always been."

Shepard nodded at her. "All right. Let's take a storage trunk each. Be _careful _with them," he warned the others.

"Remember who you are talking to, Shepard," Liara reminded him. "'Be careful'. Really."

"Sorry," he said, rolling his eyes as he and James started to lower the stacked trunks. Some of them turned out to be empty, while others contained smaller gifts, household accounts and palace staff records dating back to well before Abby was born. One particular trunk was eventually set aside from the others, and it contained very carefully-wrapped records documenting a brief history of Ferelden during the Blights.

"We'll take a stack each," Shepard directed. "You find anything interesting, read it out."

The party of five started to read in silence and it was a while before anyone spoke up.

"Oh, Abby," Liara said at length, "I have found a book entitled _The History of Grey Wardens in Ferelden_, written by a Brother Ferdinand Genitivi. You are mentioned."

A sharp intake of breath was heard before Abby cleared her throat. "Would you read it, please?"

"Of course," Liara replied. "'Abigail Cousland, Hero of Ferelden, fell during the battle of Denerim in 9:31 Dragon, her last heroic act to vanquish the archdemon Urthemiel, thus ending the fifth Blight and the terror of the darkspawn. She left no mortal body and it is widely accepted that the Maker, in His benevolence, intervened directly and immediately called her to His side'."

Liara paused and looked up at Abby, who was silent, her eyes fixed to the floor.

"And yet, you are here," EDI stated unnecessarily.

"Yes, she is," James said softly, a protective arm around her shoulders.

"Is there anything about a sixth Blight?" Abby asked.

"Not so far," Liara answered. "There _is_ an entry about your brother, though," she added, and Abby looked up, hope and desperation in her eyes. "I will read it," said the asari. "'The only surviving member of the Hero's family, Teyrn Fergus Cousland, was safely delivered following the battle of Ostagar. Demonstrating his sister's resolve and determination, he rallied the nobles of Ferelden to support their new king and assist with rebuilding Ferelden and providing alms to those left destitute or ailing following the Blight.

Having lost his wife and son at the hands of Howe the Traitor, Teyrn Cousland remarried after the landsmeet of 9:32 Dragon, taking Bann Alfstanna of Waking Seas as his bride. The Teyrn and Teyrna rebuilt Highever and were blessed with three children: a son, Diarmid, and twin daughters, Eleanor and… Abigail'."

"She was named after you," EDI said to Abby.

"And Eleanor after our mother. Thank you," Abby whispered, and Liara took that as her cue to stop reading.

"You wanna go up to the surface?" James offered. Abby touched his arm and shook her head, walking over to the wall where the swords and shields were hanging. The others watched as she removed a particularly fine sword and a shield bearing a large blue griffon on its exterior before turning back to them.

"Is there anything about Alistair?" she asked with dignity, her head held high.

"I have found something," EDI said. "I will read a short passage pertaining to the elves. 'The young king went against all popular opinion by freeing the elves and granting them their birthright, The Dales. Opposition was great, but King Alistair showed unusual tenacity, even stubbornness, and did not deviate from his plan. After the first few difficult years, a great number of Ferelden's elves once again made their home in The Dales, although many chose to remain in Ferelden, where they enjoyed the same rights and privileges as their human contemporaries'."

"What about the mages?" Abby asked animatedly. "Did he have any success with them?"

"Abby," Shepard interposed. "I can see how important this is to you, but we need to think about heading back soon, considering the preparations we'll need to make for the guards. I'd like to make a suggestion."

"Please do," she replied. "I have no wish to delay any of you."

"You're not," he reassured her. "We can give the guards the send-off they deserve while EDI stays down here. She can read much more quickly than the rest of us, and can process all of this information in a relatively short time."

"I would be pleased to," EDI agreed. "I will then be able to answer any questions you may have at a time of your choosing or, if you prefer, I will transfer the information to a datapad so you may study it in private. Would that suffice?"

Abby gave them a grateful smile. "That would more than suffice. Thank you so much."

"Is there anything you want to take with you?" Shepard asked. "We can arrange to have all of this removed to the Normandy if you'd like. It's no trouble at all."

"No, these gifts were not given to me," she answered decisively. "I will only take one of Alistair's swords and shields as mementos. I am certain he would not have minded." Shepard nodded, and Abby turned to Liara. "Perhaps when the war is over, you could return here and study our civilization in greater detail, if such a thing would interest you."

"I… would consider it an honor," Liara breathed. "I hope, when that time comes, you will accompany me. Although we are still uncertain as to how you came to be with us, and whether you wish to remain. Dr. Chakwas and I will redouble our efforts to find the answers you seek."

A huff was heard from James, and everyone looked at him, finding he seemed almost annoyed. "You know, Liara, science is awesome and all. I mean, if it weren't for people like you, we wouldn't have eezo or the mass relays, or everything else we take for granted. All I'm saying is, maybe science can't provide all the answers. Sometimes there isn't an answer. Sometimes, there doesn't _need _to be one. Sometimes, what's in our hearts, what's in our souls, is all the answer we need."

Everyone was silent for a minute before Shepard spoke. "Why don't you and Abby head on up to the surface, James?" he suggested in a firm, but not hostile, tone. "See if you can source any kindling material for our guards."

"Sure, Commander," James replied before facing the asari. "I didn't mean nothin', Liara. Just saying what's on my mind."

"And I respect that, James," she said steadily. James smiled and nodded at her before offering to carry the sword and shield for Abby.

Over the next few hours, EDI collated as much information as possible from the vault, which she secured before joining the others on the surface.

Shepard and James carried the royal guards to the surface, and a basic pyre was built for them using materials salvaged from the palace and surrounding buildings. Shepard showed Abby how to use her omni-tool to produce a flame and the pyre was lit, Abby saying a few words to send the brave men on their way. Lieutenant Cortez joined them for the small ceremony and they all sat upon the ground, sharing quiet conversation until the flames began to die down.

"It shouldn't be long, now," Abby informed her friends. "We can head back whenever you're ready."

"I'll prepare the Kodiak for our return," said Cortez, rising to his feet.

"I'll go with you," Shepard offered, also standing.

"One moment," Abby called, and James passed Alistair's shield to her, a small smile on his face. She rose, walked up to Shepard and held the shield out in front of her. "I would like you to have this, Adam."

"Wh… oh no, no, no. I can't accept that," he protested, completely flummoxed.

"I think it would look rather nice on your wall," she said with a warm smile.

"But it belonged to Alistair. I… no, I can't," he replied, shaking his head.

"I have his sword, and I have my memories of him. I need nothing else. Please, Adam. It would make me happy if you accepted this as a small token of my heartfelt thanks. You have no idea what today has meant to me. Please. Accept it with a full heart, for it is with that I give it to you."

Shepard's mouth gaped and he looked at Steve, who was grinning. He slowly nodded, taking the shield from Abby with great care. "I, um… thank you," he said quietly, and stared at his gift for a few moments. "Thank you," he said again before turning around. "Steve," he called, walking in the direction of the shuttle. Cortez, Liara and EDI followed him, leaving James and Abby alone.

"Never thought I'd see Shepard lost for words," James chuckled. "That was a great idea of yours, Abby. He loves shit like that. Uh… not that I mean it's shit. Oh, hell, I wasn't saying that."

He tutted, annoyed with himself, and Abby moved in front of him, taking his hands. "I know that. I think I've learned quite a lot about you today."

"Yeah?" he asked warily. "Like what?"

"When you said there doesn't always need to be an answer…"

"Hey, I realised what I said after I opened my damned mouth," he sighed. "I wasn't trying to make you lose hope or nothin'. Sometimes I speak without thinking. I'm sorry, Abby."

"No, you don't understand," she replied. "I happen to agree with you. If Liara and Dr. Chakwas can find an answer, then good. But, if they can't, it doesn't matter. There is nothing here for me to return to," she said, taking a look around, "but I will never forget this place, or its people. And, for whatever reason, I am now on the Normandy with my new friends. And that is not a bad thing. Look who I met. James Vega."

He looked into her eyes, her words and sentiments resonating deeply within him. "I'm real glad we met, too, Abby. I wasn't looking for anyone, you know? And I didn't think I needed anyone, either. But… now that you're here, I'm having a hard time remembering how I managed before. Y'know, before you came along."

She reached for him, pulling him closer and resting her breather mask against his. They closed their eyes, sharing a moment of togetherness, and James's frustration at not being able to kiss her eased as he lost himself in her tender embrace. He ran a hand down her back, frowning when it made contact with something sharp. He sprang back, laughing at the impish light in her eyes.

"Careful, you could have cut yourself," she teased, fingering the sword at her side. She smiled up at him, her eyes shining and her lips, maddeningly out of reach, parting slightly with an unspoken promise. "Later," she mouthed through her mask.

"Damn, Abby, I…" he began before laughing again, an unfamiliar but wholly sublime sensation coursing through him.

"Yes, I know," she whispered, and they stood together for a long moment, sharing and needing nothing but each other's company. "James? What's my nickname? What does 'chula' mean?"

"It means pretty girl," he replied softly. "Though 'pretty' doesn't quite do you justice." She smiled again and he felt his heart skip. "Does that smile mean you like my choice?"

"It does."

"Chula," he said, gently taking one of her hands. "Let's go home."

She wrapped her fingers around his and took one final look around before facing him and nodding. "Yes, James. Let's go home."


	14. Soldiering On

_We'd just like to say a huge thank-you to everyone for reading, alerting, reviewing or 'favoriting' our story. It's appreciated! :-)_

**Soldiering On**

**The Tikkun System, Perseus Veil**

"Cancel that," Shepard ordered Traynor as he leaned over her console. "And that. That one, too."

"Why, Commander," she teased, a finger at her mouth, "anyone would think you _dislike_ crew evaluations."

"Wasn't yours slated for later today?" he asked her, his indulgent tone doing nothing to disguise the fact he looked exhausted.

"Possibly…"

"Cancel it. In fact, cancel everything. Any new orders? Anything urgent?"

"No, Commander, nothing," she replied, giving him a wary look.

"Good. Joker, take us to the Citadel and step on it."

"Roger that."

"Council business?" Traynor asked, ready to fill out his itinerary. "Spectre conference?"

"Neither. We're taking the shore leave we were supposed to have before my clone intervened. I think we've all earned it."

"Very good, Commander," she said, and a few nearby crew members looked up from their stations, briefly smiling at each other before returning to their tasks. "I'll inform Admiral Hackett that we'll be in dry dock and I'll have the techs standing by at the Citadel."

"Thanks." Shepard stepped away from the console and moved towards the elevator, but stopped just before entering when he realised Traynor had followed him. "What is it, Specialist?"

She sidled closer to him, looking around before she spoke. "I hope you don't mind me asking, Commander, but are you all right? You look… well, for want of a better word, shattered."

He arched an eyebrow. "Well, I'm still in one piece, but I think we're all feeling the effects of the last few days," he answered readily, "hence the shore leave."

"It's a great idea," she nodded. "Just make sure _you _find time to relax, too, Commander."

"I appreciate your concern," he said, half-stepping into the open elevator, "but it's not needed. My life won't be worth living if I don't take some leisure time soon."

"Lieutenant Cortez?" she guessed, smiling.

"Right," he replied with a wry smile of his own as the door slid closed.

He stepped off the elevator and entered his cabin, immediately moving to the beautiful Grey Warden shield Abby had gifted him with, which he'd polished to a high shine and mounted on the wall above his bed. He stood back and studied it for a moment before slumping down onto the bed, his arms hanging loosely between his legs, his head bowed.

Traynor had hit the nail on the head: he _did _feel shattered. The campaign on Rannoch had been the latest in a series of gruelling assignments, and he was starting to feel the mental and physical effects. He was accustomed to ignoring those feelings and soldiering on, but lately he'd begun to feel like he'd spread himself too thin, and the very thought of _soldiering on_ was exhausting in itself.

His crew knew he had his 'grouchy' spells, but there was usually a damn good reason for them, and they quickly passed. Since returning from Rannoch, though, he'd felt permanently grouchy, and was finding it harder and harder to keep himself from snapping at people.

There was a handful of people on board the Normandy who knew Shepard well enough to see through him, and one of them happened to live with him. Last night, he and Steve had had what could almost be called their first serious argument. Shepard had been tired, irritable and had brushed off Steve's pleas for him to stop work and take some down time. Their exchange had ended with Steve snatching Shepard's data pads away and angrily threatening to beat him about the head with them if he didn't stop for just one minute.

It had been an empty threat, of course, but one that had given Shepard pause. Steve had always fussed over him, even when they'd just been friends, but this time there had been real hurt and worry in the shuttle pilot's voice, and that alone had been enough to open Shepard's eyes.

He straightened up and keyed his omni-tool.

"Yes, Commander?" asked Steve.

"Can you talk?"

"Hold on." Shepard waited a minute until Steve had found a private spot in the hangar. "All right. Now I can talk. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Shepard replied, stifling a yawn. "Are _you_ o–?"

"You don't _sound_ fine."

"Steve, relax. We're headed for the Citadel. We're finally going to take that shore leave."

There was a slight pause. "For real? No Spectre business? No running around after the Council?"

"None of that, I promise. Just you, me, dinner, a hot tub, candles and scented massage oil, in no particular order. No comm. and noEDI. I'll even switch my omni-tool off. Think you can handle that?"

"I think I could swing it, sure," answered Steve, his grin showing in his voice. "But only if I get to bring dessert."

Recognising the euphemism, Shepard smiled. "Will there be seconds?"

Steve chuckled. "Might even be thirds, if you play your cards right."

"Thirds? Wow. That's settled, then. Wait… someone's at the door." He leaned across his bed and touched the blinking panel at his bedside. "Who is it?"

"It's Abby. Do you have a moment?"

"Standby, I'll be right there."

"Oh, of course," she replied cheerfully. "I'll wait here for you."

"Thanks." He severed the comm. link to the door and returned to his omni-tool. "So… after everything, and you heading out first thing, we didn't get a chance to talk. We good?"

"Of course we're good. I just worry about you, you know that."

"I know, and I listened, Steve. I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too," Cortez replied quietly. "Now go get the door and come see me later, okay?"

"I will. Shepard out."

Feeling a little brighter, he rose and headed for the door, inviting Abby to enter. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the shield on his wall and she approached the bed, looking up, a soft smile on her face.

"It's come up lovely," she commented as Adam stood beside her. "Even Alistair didn't keep it that clean. It was always covered in mud."

"I still can't believe you gave it to me. I've never owned anything that belonged to a king before. You know, if you ever want it back, just say the word. I wouldn't want you regretting giving it away."

"I don't, and I won't be asking for it back," she said, taking one of his hands. "What you've done for me… I'll never be able to repay you. I…" She trailed off before shaking her head and clearing her throat. "Anyway, I came to see how you are today. Have you been sleeping properly? Eating?"

He released her hand and crossed his arms. "Have you been talking to Steve?"

"Not at all. I take my duties as Aunty Abby very seriously," she said, trying to keep a straight face, "and I don't think it's fair that Steve gets to nag you more than I. I'm simply trying to keep up, that's all."

"So now I've got you _both_ on my back. Well, that's just great," he complained, affecting a frown. "And is Nephew Adam allowed to enquire after his elderly aunt?"

She folded her arms to match his posture, her lips pursed. "He is, but if he knows what's good for him, he'll never call her 'elderly' again."

"Yes, ma'am," he said, hanging his head, and she laughed. "No, seriously. How are you holding up?"

"I'm fine. It was quite a cathartic experience, seeing Ferelden again… what was left of it, anyway."

He watched her for a few seconds. "You're really okay with it?"

"I'm really okay with it."

"And what about the beacon?"

"What about it?"

"When I activated the original beacon three years ago, there were some… after-effects. I was wondering if you'd experienced anything unusual."

"Such as?"

"Nightmares, for one," he said pointedly.

"I'm a Grey Warden, Adam. I've always had nightmares. I can cope with them."

He nodded slowly. "Nice dodge, Abby."

She blinked at his serious expression but quickly regained her composure. "Dr. Chakwas did say that my taint might have affected my own experience. I feel quite well, Adam, and should that change, you will be the first to know, I assure you."

"Okay," he replied, keeping his voice even to disguise his scepticism.

"Changing the subject," she said brightly, "I wanted to ask your permission about something."

"Oh?"

"I just wanted to say thank-you to everyone for, well, for being such good friends."

"You don't need to do that," he began.

"Will you let me finish?" she teased, and he nodded. "I was thinking of holding a social gathering in my quarters. Nothing too lively, just, well I don't know how you do things around here. Maybe a little music, food, conversation? Or would that be too pedestrian?"

"A party?"

"Is that what you call it?"

"Yeah, I was planning to throw a party on the Citadel before you and I met, but plans changed. What would you call it, then?"

"Well, the only social get-togethers I ever attended were the ones my parents held at Highever. They usually entailed sitting up very straight, wearing a serene smile and listening to my father's friends waffling on about the bloody Orlesians again. They were old enemies of Ferelden. Oh, and one of the families would invariably bring along a snooty brat who I was supposed to make eyes at just in case a potential marriage was on the cards. That's about the sum of my knowledge of 'parties'."

"That sounds like _anti-_fun to me," he commented, wrinkling his nose. "How'd you deal with the snooty brats?"

She leaned closer and lowered her voice. "While Mother and Father weren't looking, I'd eat with my mouth open, or use the pudding spoon for the soup course. And I'd _slurp._ They'd turn their prissy little noses right up at me."

He shook his head. "Aunty Abby, I'm shocked and dismayed. And there was me thinking you were a lady."

"Oh, I am. Just a choosy one."

"Resourceful, too," he grinned. "Permission granted, and I think we can make your gathering a little more fun than that. For starters, in this universe we have something called 'booze'."

She grinned at him, her eyes sparkling. "We had booze in Ferelden, too."

"Then we're already halfway there. But I'm going to get you some help. I know someone who might be at a loose end." He cued up his omni-tool. "Tali, are you busy right now?"

"Not really," she replied, sounding bored. "Everyone in Engineering's been nice, but they don't need any help. Why?" she asked suspiciously. "You don't want me to do something crazy with you, do you? Because I think I'm all crazied out for one lifetime."

"You've met Abby, right?"

"Sure, I spoke to her in the Mess before we left for Rannoch."

"She needs help planning a party. Nothing too crazy, I promise."

"Great! Will there be booze?"

"Absolutely. She's staying in the Port Observation Lounge and the crew bar is in there too, though the cabinets are locked up tight. You know anyone with decent enough tech skills to crack the locks?"

"Tell her I'll be right there!"

~o~O~o~

"Got it!" Tali announced triumphantly, unlocking the drinks cabinet in Abby's quarters with her omni-tool. "Have a seat," she invited, patting a bar stool, and Abby hopped on, watching as Tali removed several bottles of brightly-coloured concoctions and set them on the bar. "So what's your poison, Abby?"

"Um… I'm rather fond of mead, but red wine will do at a pinch."

Tali quickly lined up two large glasses and scanned the bottles. "Okay. I don't think we have those. How about this?" she asked, holding up an exotic-looking bottle containing a florid, gloopy liquid. "It at least _looks_ red, or maybe it's purple."

"I think it's a very pretty color. It matches your mask," Abby complimented genuinely.

"I was wondering when that would come up," Tali chuckled. "Thank you for not staring at it, anyway. Most people do, even those who've met quarians before."

"I wouldn't dream of staring at it," Abby replied as Tali filled their glasses.

"Really? You're not even going to ask me about it?"

"Well, no… I hope you don't mind, but after I met you I asked EDI to, um – upload? Some information about the quarian people to my omni-tool. EDI showed me how to do it. I've met several different species on the Normandy, and I've read up as much as I can about each of them. So, you see, I know exactly why you wear a mask and envirosuit."

"Oh," Tali mumbled in surprise, not expecting that answer. "And what do you think of the quarian people?"

"You have a rich and fascinating history. In fact, if you don't think the suggestion insulting, I find myself identifying with the quarians more than any other race I've encountered."

Tali moved to Abby's side of the bar and climbed onto the bar stool next to her. "How so?"

Abby shrugged. "In many ways, actually. I won't bore you with it."

"Of course you won't, I'm sure it's a great story. Tell me what happened to you."

Abby eyed her for a moment, seeming to consider Tali's offer to share her thoughts, but she hesitated. It wasn't a natural thing for her to share her more intimate feelings with someone she didn't know, and placing such trust in someone unfamiliar could be folly. But there was something about Tali, something that assured her the quarian woman's prodding was due to both genuine interest and concern. Besides, Abby thought, it would be nice to make a friend in someone who'd also been displaced from her home, and therefore may well truly understand her.

"Abby?" Tali asked quietly, bringing her back to the present. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, of course," she replied with a soft smile. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to become distracted. Are you quite certain you want to listen to my ramblings?"

Tali nodded. "Sure I'm sure. I've never heard a human compare themselves to a quarian before, at least not in public."

"Why ever not?"

She sighed. "Most other races look down their noses at us. Maybe it's because we're nomads who live off whatever we can salvage. Or maybe they just don't understand us."

"Or maybe they're just plain ignorant," Abby said in indignation, reminded of the elves of Ferelden. "Do you know what I think, Tali? It's their loss."

"Damn right it is!" Tali raised her glass before putting it down, jumping off her seat and rummaging behind the bar. "Here," she said, passing Abby a straw and returning to join her.

"What's this?" Abby asked.

"An emergency induction port," Tali said solemnly, placing it in her drink, and Abby did the same.

"What do I do with it?"

"You put it in your mouth and suck," Tali instructed, giving a demonstration.

Abby raised a hand to her mouth and sniggered. "I'm not sure I should… it looks quite, well, indecent."

"I hadn't thought of that," said Tali. "Wait a minute… for you to think this indecent, you must have some idea in your mind of what _makes_ it indecent. What exactly _do _you have in your mind?"

"I couldn't possibly say," laughed Abby, covering her face with her hands and shaking her head.

"Ha! And James told me you were such a lady," Tali teased, prodding Abby's knee.

"I am!" she protested through her giggles. "Mind you, you're the second person today I've tried to convince of that."

"Being a lady is overrated," proclaimed Tali, taking a large draw from her glass. "Come on! Keep up!"

Abby tentatively placed the straw in her mouth and, squeezing her eyes closed, drew some of the liquid into her mouth. Her eyes snapped open. "It makes the drink go into my mouth," she mock-gasped, closely scrutinising the straw. "You have such wonders at your disposal here."

"Cherish your emergency induction port, my friend," Tali counselled sagely. "Now, come on. Tell me about yourself, and then we have a party to arrange." She held up her glass again. "Keelah se'lai."

Abby raised her own glass. "Keelah se'lai. What does it mean?"

"It means, 'By the home world I hope to see one day'."

A lump came to Abby's throat but she held her smile in place, her vision blurring for a second. "I'm so pleased for you, Tali. I heard that your people will soon be returning to Rannoch."

"Thank you." Both ladies took a drink, Abby unaware that Tali was watching her very closely through her mask. "My full name is Tali'Zorah vas Normandy," the quarian imparted.

"Your people take the name of the ship they serve on, don't they? Did you serve aboard the Normandy, then?"

"Sort of. I was never officially part of the crew, but I 'helped out' a few times, like I'm doing now. It's another long story, which I'll tell you about one day, but the name was given to me by my own people as an insult. What they didn't know is how proud I am of it, which is why I chose to keep it. The Normandy will always be home to me, no matter where I am, and it's thanks to Shepard that I even have the option of choosing my name. If there's something my people have learned over the years, 'home' is where you find it."

"I'll drink to that," said Abby, tapping her glass against Tali's.

"Now, you seem to know my story, Abby. Tell me yours."

"Why don't we arrange the party first?" Abby suggested. "We might need some time to plan – I have no idea how to throw a party, not like they have here, anyway. Any ideas?"

Tali laughed. "The last person you should ask is a quarian. We're not exactly party animals."

"EDI, can you help?" Abby asked.

"Please specify the nature of the event."

"Well, there isn't one, really. It's a get-together for friends. You're invited, too, EDI. Bring your platform along."

"Thank you, Abby. I look forward to attending. What is the occasion?"

"Um… well, there's no occasion, really. I'd just like us all to have a bit of fun."

"I see. I will extrapolate elements from all known human, turian, quarian and asari celebrations."

"I wouldn't bother with the quarian ones," Tali quipped. "We want to have fun, remember? Just stick to the human ones – they know how to enjoy themselves."

"Very well. Processing."

~o~O~o~

**Port Observation Lounge, a few hours later**

Tali and Abby stood back, admiring their – and EDI's – work. "Okay… we have human snacks and dextro snacks," said Tali. "_Plenty _of booze. Music, lights, balloons, a seating area and a small area for dancing. Now all we need are people. The invitations have been sent and everyone should be here soon. Let's see who's unfashionable enough to arrive first."

"Do humans still dance at social gatherings, then?" Abby asked. "I rather enjoy the remigold."

"I'm not sure I'm familiar with that," Tali mumbled.

"Oh, it was a very popular dance in Ferelden. A group of participants join hands and form a circle, and go back and forth while singing a popular hymn or song."

"Hmm… dancing these days is more of an individual thing," the quarian said thoughtfully. "Each individual 'style' – if you can call it that – is unique, although the Normandy has its very own dance attributed to its captain. It's called the 'Shepard Shuffle'."

"Really? Adam has his very own dance? How wonderful!"

"I'm not sure I would call it 'dancing' exactly, but yes, it _is_ pretty wonderful," Tali supplied. "We will need to get him really, _really_ drunk for him to do it."

"I can't imagine Adam drunk," Abby said, smiling, "although I'm certain I'd like to see him have fun. He needs it."

"Oh, he _will._ Do you know how many drinks it takes for Shepard to get really, really drunk?" Tali asked, and Abby shook her head. "One," she whispered behind her hand.

"One? How come?"

"I don't know whether you heard or not, but Cerberus rebuilt him after he died."

"I did hear something about that, yes," she replied seriously.

"Well, they gave him new organs, including a brand new liver. Alcohol has the same effect on him as it would on a two year-old. And he forgets that. Every. Single. Time._"_

"I can't see it, but I suspect there's an evil grin lurking behind that mask," Abby guessed, and Tali steepled her fingers before they laughed.

The door panel chirped, then, and Tali rushed to the door. "Let's see who's first. My money's on Garrus or Liara. Ready?"

Abby nodded and took a deep breath, hoping her party would be a success. "Ready."

Tali pressed the panel, the door sliding open, and Garrus entered, clutching a bottle. "Hello, ladies," he said. "I heard there was a party."

"Come in, Garrus! Welcome!" Abby greeted, taking his arm and leading him to the bar. "You look very handsome," she complimented him.

"Yeah, um, so do you," he replied awkwardly, looking at her figure-hugging dress, loaned from Liara. "Hm. Not handsome. You know, the female equivalent, whatever that is."

"Thank you!" she replied graciously. "May I pour you a drink?"

"No, I'm good. I brought my own. Joker told me I'm supposed to bring either a bottle or a scented candle. I figured I couldn't drink a candle, so..."

"He meant as a gift for the hostess!" Tali chided, shaking her head.

"Oh. Sorry. Here you go," he said, offering Abby the half-bottle of turian brandy.

"Why don't we share it?" she suggested.

"Now that idea, I like," he agreed, looking around the lounge. "I'm… not the first one here, am I? Oh, crap. It's usually T'Soni."

"I'm here," announced Liara as she breezed through the open door.

"Were you waiting for me to arrive?" Garrus accused. "How did you get here so fast?"

"I saw how eager you were to be the first, so I didn't want to steal your thunder. Oh, Abby. You look beautiful," she said to her friend, passing her a posy of flowers, and the two ladies exchanged a hug.

"Yes, _beautiful_," Tali said pointedly to Garrus, whose mandibles flexed.

More guests arrived soon after, and before long the mini dance floor was full. Abby stood next to her small pile of hostess gifts, arranged on a table, as she waited to greet more of her guests. She watched the individual dance styles in amusement before she spotted James and Steve entering the Lounge, carrying a keg of beer between them.

"Okay, _now _the party's here!" James loudly called out, his eyes roaming the room. When he caught sight of Abby, his face dropped, along with the keg as it slipped from his grasp.

"Are you trying to break my foot?" Steve complained, hopping back, before he noticed Abby walking towards them, wearing a brilliant smile.

"Hello, there," she said to her friends. "Thank you for coming."

Steve let out a whistle. "Damn, girl, now I see why James dropped the keg on my foot! Lookin' good!" he exclaimed, kissing her on the cheek. "Hey, is Shepard here yet?"

"No, not yet," she replied, biting her lip as she noticed James's face turn as red as her dress.

"I'll be back in just a little while," Steve told her before EDI, who was standing nearby with Joker, caught his attention.

"He is in the CIC," she informed Cortez.

"Thanks, EDI."

"Narc," Joker teased, rolling his eyes when the AI gave him a blank stare.

James watched Steve depart and turned back to Abby, not quite looking directly at her. "So… how's the party goin'?" he asked casually, fingering his collar. "You like beer? I like beer. A lot. S'why I brought a lot. Heh," he laughed before blowing out a long breath and looking around the room. "Smooth, Vega. _Real_ smooth," he muttered to himself.

"Is beer the same as ale?" Abby asked, stepping a little closer to him, "because I do like that."

"Yeah, yeah… I guess it is," he answered with an exaggerated nod. "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"

She nudged him with her elbow. "What do you think of my dress, James? It's one of Liara's."

"Yeah, I can see that. Those asari sure can dress to kill." He nodded again several times, trying not to stare at her sculpted shoulders, her swan-like neck and oh, just the tiniest hint of cleavage, which he'd never seen before due to the modesty of her everyday apparel. "Nice. Yeah. Nice," he managed, his voice rough.

"'Nice'? James Vega, is that the best you can do?" she joked, hands on hips, knowing full well the effect her dress was having on him.

"You're a cruel, cruel woman, Abby Cousland," he whispered, leaning closer and catching her scent of vanilla flowers. "You're the most beautiful sight I've ever laid eyes on. You could make a blind man see."

"Oh? Then why can't you look at me?" she whispered back.

"'Cause if I do, I might have to kiss you right in front of all these people," he replied, "and that would not be very ladylike. Well, you know what I mean."

"But you'd be doing the kissing, not me," she replied and then walked away to attend to her other guests, giving him a quick backward glance and what he suspected was an eyebrow waggle.

"Maldición," he breathed before shaking his head and dragging the keg to the bar.

A short time later, Cortez returned with Shepard, Major Alenko and Traynor, who'd been in the CIC with the commander.

"Captain on the deck!" Steve announced while Kaidan and Traynor presented Abby with a small gift. "And I have it on good authority that he's planning on busting some sweet moves on the dance floor!"

"The hell he is," Shepard protested with a hard look at Steve, which softened considerably when the pilot winked at him.

"Guess I'll have to find myself another dance partner, then," said Steve, moving to the small crowd in the centre of the room. "Enjoy yourself," he ordered, pointing at Shepard. "I'll be watching."

"Yeah, yeah," Shepard teased, waving Cortez away and turning to the hostess. "You look amazing, Abby," he complimented, presenting her with an ornate bottle containing golden liquid.

"Is this what I think it is?" she asked in excitement.

"Closest I could get to actual mead," he explained, "but I'm told it's made from honey and is so sweet it'll make your teeth itch."

"Oh, thank you! I must open it and share it around!"

"No, this is for you, that's the whole point of bringing a gift," he explained with a glance at the keg, shaking his head as a small queue began to form next to it. "It's actually from me and Steve. I heard you like it so he picked up a bottle last time we were on the Citadel."

"Well, in that case I'll keep it for a special occasion," she smiled and they watched as Tali joined the others on the dance floor. "A little bird tells me you have a special dance all of your own," she said in a conspiratorial whisper, her eyes shining with mischief.

He groaned, rolling his eyes. "And would that 'little bird' happen to drink using an emergency induction port?"

"I'm not at liberty to say."

"Uh-huh."

They glanced at each other and laughed before their eyes returned to the dance floor. "So, you feeling okay?" he quietly asked.

"Are you?"

"I asked first."

"I feel fantastic," she assured him. "What could be better than all of my friends gathered around and enjoying themselves? Thank you for letting me hold this… 'party'."

"Thank you for hosting it. You're doing a great job."

"And how are _you_ feeling, Adam?"

"Oh, I think they're trying to get your attention," he said, pointing at the dancers, glad for the distraction.

"Abby! Get over here!" Tali shouted, waving over to them.

"And bring Shepard with you!" Cortez added.

"I'm good right here," he answered firmly, giving Abby a gentle push. "Better see to your guests."

"I'll get to see the Shepard Shuffle sometime!" she called over her shoulder before joining her friends.

"Wait… the Shepard _what_?"

"Hey, Commander," said Kaidan, appearing at his side. "You dancing?"

"You askin'?"

Kaidan chuckled and took a sip of his beer. "No, I think I'm good here, too. It's a great party. Abby seems to be enjoying herself."

Shepard watched his 'aunt' squeeze herself between Tali and Cortez, throwing her head back and laughing when they bumped their hips against hers. "Yeah. Maybe a little _too _much."

"What do you mean?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing. Nothing. You gonna stand there all night, Alenko, or are you gonna grab me a beer?"

"Since we're on shore leave, and I _am_ the ranking officer on board, it seems to me you're the one who should be getting _me_ a refill, Commander," he hinted, waving his empty bottle.

"And it seems to me you can cram it, Major," Shepard joked. "We're not on shore leave _yet. _Come on, let's get in line before the keg's tapped out."

~o~O~o~

The party was in full swing, and by now it was well known that Shepard had not only reached his one-drink limit, but was halfway through his _second _beer. James watched from his spot next to the view screen as his commander ambled around, wearing a bleary smile, but still resisting all attempts to get him to dance.

Then, James's eyes moved to Abby, who had only left the dance floor to greet any new arrivals or to ask everyone if they had an emergency induction port to go with their drink. She looked absolutely stunning, and he was more than a little embarrassed by his tongue-tied display when he'd first set eyes on her. Hell, the only thing he needed to make it worse was to have drooled all over her.

Not for the first time, he asked himself why the hell someone like her would go for someone like him. But, as her eyes searched for him and she gave him a secret smile from among the crowd, his heart leapt in his chest and he knew that question didn't even matter anymore.

And that was because maybe, just maybe, his need to look after her – and the fact he thought constantly about her, about her smile and her laugh – meant more to him than he was entirely prepared to admit. Maybe Abby Cousland was more than just a beautiful girl who made him feel good.

Maybe a lot more.

He sighed, not yet willing to fully evaluate what his heart was already accepting, and met her eyes as she smiled, shaking his head at her beckoned offer to join her on the dance floor. As she turned back to the crowd, something else struck him and he frowned.

He was worried about her.

He loved the fact she worked a room so well, and the sound of her laughter, the sight of her dancing, the sheen of her hair when it caught the lights and the way _that dress _tightly hugged every glorious curve brought joy into his heart, but was there just a little shrillness to that laugh? Was that smile just a little forced? Was she dancing just a little too energetically?

He wanted to dismiss his doubts, wanted to believe that everything was as it seemed, but something wasn't quite right. And he was damned if he could put his finger on it.

He looked at Shepard again, who was half-heartedly fighting off Cortez's attempts to pull him onto the dance floor. Shepard had lost his family at a young age, just like Abby, and they'd both activated a prothean beacon. Shepard, of all people, would be concerned about her, but James hadn't once seen his commander watching Abby, even before he'd drunk one-and-a-half beers.

Maybe he was imagining things?

And then, James had seen it: Shepard's eyes had moved slowly and carefully to Abby and lingered on her for just a moment, and James knew what that look meant. Even Shepard, who was wasted on one-and-a-half beers, was worried about her.

"May I have this dance, ser?"

James whirled around, finding Abby standing behind him, holding a perfectly-manicured hand out to him. "You look so far away, James. Please say you'll dance with me."

He shrugged, warmth spreading through his core as he looked into her eyes. "Guess I could manage that," he grinned, and allowed himself to be led to the small dance floor. Once there, Abby took one of his hands and placed it on her hip, clutching his other hand with her own.

"I don't care if we're out of time with the music, this is how I want us to dance," she smiled up at him, and he leaned down, nuzzling her cheek as they slowly began to move.

"All right, damn it!" Shepard grumbled to their side, and Garrus climbed up onto a chair, calling for everyone's attention.

"Listen up, people!" he called out, and everyone turned to him. "Shepard threw down on Rannoch, and now he's going to _party_ down on the Normandy! Remember where you were on this night… you're about to witness that which cannot be _de_-witnessed."

"Tha's not even a word, Vakarian," Shepard slurred before he was nudged forward by Cortez. "You are in _so_ muzj drouble," he threatened his partner, his eyes half-closed as he pointed vaguely in Steve's direction.

"Duly noted, now dance!" Cortez ordered.

Shepard pulled a face at him before bending his arms, clamping them closely to his sides and wiggling his shoulders as though he had an itch on his back.

"There it is! The Shepard Shuffle!" Tali whooped, and Abby and James broke off their own dance to watch the spectacle.

"It _is _wonderful!" Abby exclaimed in delight, clapping her hands and moving to Shepard's side along with Steve, mimicking Adam's jerky movements. "I love the Shepard Shuffle!"

Before long, the other dancers followed suit and Adam chugged down the rest of his second beer, hoping to block out the humiliation. It quickly took effect, warming his very bones, and he began to realise that his crew mates were not laughing _at_ him, but _with_ him. He started to laugh, not knowing why, and felt Steve's arm wrap around his shoulders, knowing his pilot was delighted to see him finally having fun.

~o~O~o~

The night at an end, Abby positioned herself next to the door as she thanked her guests for attending and was rewarded with countless hugs and kisses. Shepard had long since been dragged away by Cortez to get some sleep, and now only Tali, James, Liara and a few others remained.

"Great party, Abby," James commented, his hand on her back as they lingered by the door. "You need a hand cleaning up?"

"No, I think we're fine," she said, looking around. "The Normandy crew are remarkably tidy. I suppose it comes with being in the military?"

He nodded. "You got that right. They wouldn't leave your quarters in a mess, anyway. They love you."

"Do they?" she asked, looking up at him.

"Yeah," he replied softly. "They all love you."

"And I love them, James. Every one of them."

Their eyes held for a moment and James, remembering there were other people around, cleared his throat. "So, I was wondering… when we reach the Citadel, you wanna grab some dinner, catch a movie, somethin' like that?"

"Another date?"

"A _real _date," he answered. "Nice food, too, not some shitty noodles."

"The noodles were delicious," she insisted, which caused him to scoff, "and the company was first-rate. You could take me to the waste compactor and I would still have the best time."

He shook his head, tickled by the compliment. "You know, you look… well, I'm not always the best with words, but what keeps coming to mind is 'breathtaking'."

"That's much better than 'nice', isn't it?" she smiled, wrapping her fingers around his arm.

"Yeah," he chuckled before his expression grew serious. "Hey, Chula, you know, a lot has happened since we met. I'm here if you need me. You know that, right?"

"Of course I do, and I'm very grateful." She glanced around, seeing that no one was looking, and before she could turn around she was pulled tightly against James, his hand at her cheek to turn her head, and she was lost in a sea of sensations as his lips connected with hers.

Then, too quickly, he pulled away, leaving her breathless. "I'll see you when we get to the Citadel, Chula," he promised with a lopsided smile.

"How long will that take?" she asked anxiously, hoping it would not be too long before she saw him again.

"EDI?" he asked. "ETA on the Citadel?"

"One hour, thirteen minutes and sixteen seconds."

"Think you can cope that long?" he joked.

"I can, but I don't know about you," she replied, and they both laughed. "Go and get some sleep," she advised him.

"You too."

She held her smile, trying not to think about bed and the possibility of another nightmare. "Goodnight, James."

"Good _morning_, Abby," he corrected, feathering her cheek with his fingers before leaving the Lounge.

She watched the door close and looked around, seeing Tali, Liara and a few others clearing away the food. Feeling tired but not wanting to sleep, she helped out and bid her friends goodnight before making her and Tali, who'd remained behind, a soft drink each, complete with emergency induction ports.

They took a seat on a couch, legs tucked beneath them, and recounted the evening's events. "I can't thank you enough for your help," Abby said to her newest friend. "It was a wonderful night."

"Happy to help," replied the quarian, watching as Abby quickly glanced at her bed, and the data pad on the night stand. "What's that?" she asked.

"Hm? Oh, it's just a data pad."

"I can see that," Tali teased. "What do you like to read? You know, I could recommend a few, uh, 'romantic' novels, if you need any ideas for James." Expecting Abby to laugh at that, Tali was surprised when she gave no reaction at all. "Oh… bad idea, huh?"

"No, I'm sorry, Tali," Abby sighed. "It's just… well, I don't have any racy novels on that data pad. It actually contains the answers to what really happened to my home planet."

Tali nodded. "I heard about your trip there. What does it say?"

"I don't know. I haven't read it yet."

"Oh. I can understand that. You want to know and yet, in a way, you don't."

"That's about it, yes."

"So you planned a party to take your mind off it," Tali guessed shrewdly, looking at Abby, who did not respond. "And now, the party is over, and the data pad is still there."

Abby nodded, raising a hand to massage her brow. "I don't know if I'm ready to read it yet."

"Then don't. Why not sleep on it?"

Abby's eyes quickly flitted to her bed, and the fleeting anxiety in them did not go unnoticed by Tali. "Yes, maybe later."

"It's past 2am and you should sleep, but you look pretty comfortable right here," Tali said. "You want me to stay? To tell you the truth, I don't think I can make it to the Crew Quarters."

"Of course you can stay," Abby replied, smiling and feeling strangely relieved. "Why don't you have the bed? I _am _comfortable here."

Tali placed her drink down and hopped off the couch. She then walked to Abby's bed and grabbed the pillows and comforter before returning to the couch.

"I'm fine here, too," she said, passing Abby a pillow, making herself comfortable on the couch and draping the comforter over her and Abby's legs. "This reminds me of my time on the Neema, the ship I served on after completing my Pilgrimage. A suite this size would have housed up to twenty quarians, and we all slept close to one another. But I guess you already knew that, having studied my people," she said, a smile in her voice.

"Actually, I didn't. Tell me more," Abby invited.

Tali shook her head. "I will, but I remember you promised to tell me about _your_ people and home world. I wouldn't want to bore you by talking about quarians all night."

"Oh, you wouldn't be, really," Abby began.

"I insist," Tali replied sweetly.

"All right," Abby agreed, suspecting she knew what Tali was up to, and also suspecting that they were going to be very good friends.


	15. Hot Water

**Hot Water**

**The Citadel, Silversun Strip**

"_Now_ what are they arguing about?" Shepard asked Traynor as they stood outside the apartment, watching ten of their friends, all of whom were dressed up for a night out.

"I believe they're debating where we should actually go. The current favourite is the casino, although the combat simulator's a close second."

Shepard shook his head and sighed. "I thought it'd be nice for us all to do something together."

"You could always order them to," she joked.

"No, we're on shore leave. I don't want to be issuing orders. Wait a minute…" A sly grin came to his face and he stepped forward, clapping his hands twice to gain everyone's attention. "Why don't we all get something to eat?" he asked his friends, knowing the mention of food usually piqued their interest.

"But Abby and I were going to try out the shooting range," Garrus whined.

"And James and Grunt were planning to go head-to-head in the sim!" Joker exclaimed. "I got bets going here!"

Grunt stepped closer to James and flashed him a feral grin. "I'll squeeze your puny friend 'til he squeaks like a varren's chew toy," he half-joked.

"That right, Plates?" asked James, squaring up to the huge krogan, who'd joined them after Shepard had settled a dispute with C-Sec.

"That's right, Shorty. Heh heh heeeh."

"Look, no one is doing any _squeezing_," Shepard insisted. "I just want us all to spend a little time together, as friends. You can all do whatever you like later on."

"That an order, Commander?" Kaidan teased. "Because I seem to recall –"

"Only if it has to be," interrupted Shepard, folding his arms. "Come on, guys, let's go back to the sushi bar. I seem to remember a certain quarian saying she's always wanted to go there," he said with a faint smile at Tali, who dipped her head.

"But couldn't because you trashed the place?" Garrus asked. "Have they even fixed it up yet?"

"I didn't start it, if you'll recall. Anyway, the sign's back up."

"Seriously, Commander? What about my bets?" Joker complained with a plaintive look at Kaidan. "Can't you overrule him or something?"

Kaidan shrugged. "Actually, I'm in the mood for sushi myself."

"Ah, crap." Joker huffed and started to limp ahead. "You're totally buyin' if you're screwing me outta my chance to make a profit tonight, Shepard," he said with a pointed look at the commander. "And we still haven't discussed that whole bait thing."

"That went well," Shepard said evenly as everyone except Traynor and Cortez followed Joker, who was still muttering to himself.

"Well, Tali and Major Alenko seemed enthusiastic at least," said Traynor. "You _do _know Joker's not going to let you get away with it, though, don't you?"

"I'd be disappointed if he did," Shepard answered, and Traynor smiled before catching up to the others.

"I'm looking forward to us having a meal together, too," Steve said, sidling closer to the commander. "Just don't forget you promised me the hot tub _and_ a massage with no interruptions. Or did you plan on ordering me to do something else?"

"Oh, I haven't forgotten," Adam answered with a grin, "and maybe tonight _you _can be in charge. _If_ you can take the responsibility, that is."

"I can handle bossing you around for a change, sure," Steve chuckled. "And we'll definitely need some food before I assume my new job. I've heard it can be quite energetic."

"That it can." Shepard winked at Steve before nodding towards the end of the Strip, and the laughing couple made their way to the sushi bar.

When they arrived outside, however, they stumbled upon another argument.

"We can't _all_ sit with Shepard," Kaidan was telling his squabbling friends. "There are twelve of us, and the tables only seat four apiece."

"Shepard is my battlemaster," Grunt declared imperiously, "and my krantt will eat with me," he added with a nod at Garrus.

"No arguments here," said the turian, nodding back.

"That leaves a spare seat," James pointed out, and Grunt positioned himself in front of the marine, pushing his jaw out.

"The drell was also part of my krantt. Take his place and invoke the wrath of Clan Urdnot."

"Fair enough," James shrugged, "though it has to be said that Abby here is a guest of honour, and she's pretty good friends with me and Esteban. That's _four _with Shepard_." _

"No, all wrong," Joker disagreed, shaking his head. "Shepard'll want those of us that've been with him from day one, through thick and thin. That's me, Liara and Garrus. Sorry Kaidan, but, you know, Horizon."

"Let's not forget the bridge staff," Traynor chipped in. "The ones who run the show behind the scenes. That means me, Joker and EDI."

"Right!" Joker agreed. "Two votes for me! I'm in!"

Another argument broke out and Steve and Shepard, who were standing a little way back, looked at each other. "You're going to wind up upsetting someone," Steve observed.

"Then I may as well go the whole way," he answered, placing his hand on Steve's back, and together they joined the others. "Steve and I are on a date," he announced. "We're glad to have you with us, and we're sure you'll find tables _nearby_." To his side, he noticed Steve's head turn toward him and saw the gleam of the pilot's teeth.

"Wait, you just strong-armed us into eating with you," Joker argued, "and now you're gonna dump your oldest and most loyal friends?"

"No, it's fine," Garrus stated with a casual wave of his hand. "Makes sense, actually. There'll be plenty of room at their table if another _clone_ shows up."

"Room for two, in fact," Kaidan said thoughtfully, stroking his jaw.

"_Very_ funny," replied Shepard, bending slightly when Cortez whispered something in his ear. "One of our crewmates has suggested we push the tables together. Would _that_ stop the arguments?"

There was silence, and several pairs of eyes moved shiftily from side to side.

"Who gets to sit at the head of the table with you?" asked Liara, and Shepard groaned.

"There _is _no head of the table, but okay, if you insist. Steve on one side of me, Abby on the other. James next to Abby because they're also on a date. Tali next to Steve because she missed out on dining here before. Anyone else on a date? No? Then the rest of you can play One Potato, Two Potato or whatever to decide. I'm hungry." He started to walk down the steps to the restaurant, noticing there wasn't a huge queue this time.

"But that'll take forever!" Joker moaned.

"Better get started, then."

A smug-looking James hooked his arms through Abby's and Tali's, leading them down the steps behind Steve, while the rest eschewed the potato game and very unceremoniously pushed their way in line.

When Shepard reached the bottom, he waited patiently while the concierge was booking a couple into the restaurant. Once finished, the Frenchman plastered a smile on his face and turned around. "Good evening, Com… ah…" His eyes bulged and he reached behind himself, pressing a small button beneath his desk.

"Problem?" asked Shepard.

"Not at all," the man laughed, a shrill note in his voice. "It is, uh, good to see you again, Commander… and you 'ave brought your friends this time! So many friends…"

"Yeah, I thought you could probably use the custom after what happened the last time," said Shepard charmingly. "Looks like you've started to fix the place up. Doesn't seem as busy as before, though."

"That is no doubt in part due to the fact we are now known as the restaurant 'oo serves a side order of random violence," said the concierge, mopping his brow with a handkerchief as two ushers appeared at his side.

"Ah. That's unfortunate," Shepard commented. "Well, we'd like three tables, preferably pushed together. Would that be okay?"

"For you, Commander, of course," the concierge replied insincerely, deciding it would be unwise to throw a Spectre out on his ass. "Les mettre dans le côté merdique," he hissed at the ushers, waving his arm with a flourish. Shepard eyed him suspiciously for a second, but nodded ahead, indicating his friends should follow him.

"Anyone speak French?" he whispered behind him.

"Doesn't 'merde' mean shit or shitty?" Steve replied quietly. "I'm sure he said something like that."

"Or maybe he meant 'murder'," James speculated. "That's kinda what happened here last time, right?"

Noticing the look of alarm in Abby's eyes, Shepard patted her arm. "It was self-defence, actually."

"Yeah, with a human shield!" Joker shouted from the back. "A _crippled _human shield!"

"EDI, can you turn his volume down or something?" Shepard called up the line as they were led around to the rear of the restaurant.

"I am working on it," she quipped.

As they were being seated, Shepard's omni-tool pinged, and he briefly read the start of a message before setting the device to Silent.

"What was that?" Steve asked him.

"Nothing important," he whispered. "The Asari Councillor wants me for something. She can wait 'til tomorrow."

"You sure?"

He nodded. "I promised you I wouldn't be running off anywhere, and I intend to keep my word," he said, and Steve gave him a warm smile. "They know where we are if something urgent comes up. Otherwise, I'm incommunicado."

"Thank you," Steve murmured, squeezing Adam's hand beneath the table.

"So, what do you think of the place, Abby?" Shepard asked her as they looked around.

"It's… interesting," she replied, trying not to look too dismayed at the ruined, patched-up room they were in. "Yes… interesting. The décor is really… uh… fascinating," she offered, forcing a bright smile.

"You know, Commander, I'm sure that huge crack in the ceiling wasn't there before," Joker noted as he looked up, flinching when a drop of water fell into his eye.

"All adds to the charm," Shepard smiled. "Hey, look, Abby, Tali," he said, pointing at the large illuminated fish tank to their side, which was also cracked but, unlike the ceiling, was taped up. "We get to choose what we're eating from there. Well, what most of us will be eating. They do cater for quarians and turians, Tali – I checked."

"Thanks, Shepard," replied Tali, craning her neck for a better look. "Uh… not that I'm an expert on fish, but shouldn't they have _two _eyes?"

"What the f –" James began, his words stopped by a swift kick under the table from Shepard, who glared at him and nodded to the two women. "Oh, yeah, right," James mumbled. "Uh, not all of 'em have two eyes, Tali."

"Are you sure?" she asked, peering at a deformed-looking creature which looked like it was struggling to stay afloat.

"Yeah, it's the, ah, Cyclops Fish," Shepard claimed. "Very rare and expensive."

"Delicious," James added, smacking his lips.

"Cyclops Fish?" Abby questioned, an eyebrow raised. "Really."

"That's right," answered Shepard, squirming slightly. "You're catching on."

"I certainly am," she grinned.

At that moment, a waiter arrived and hovered close to Shepard until his conversation with Abby had ended. "Are you ready to order, monsieur?" he asked in a poor imitation of a French accent.

"Yeah, I'll have…" Shepard quickly scanned the menu, looking for what he'd planned to order when he'd last visited the place with Joker. "A Philadelphia roll for me, no onion. California for you?" he asked Steve, who nodded.

"Ah," the waiter mumbled apologetically. "I am sorry, monsieur, but zey are off ze menu."

"Okay, then. How about rainbow rolls?"

The waiter grimaced, shaking his head.

Shepard fidgeted in his seat, shooting daggers at his friends farther down the table, who were whispering behind their hands. "Futomaki? Maki? Inari?" he asked. The waiter cleared his throat before shaking his head again. "Do you actually have _any _sushi on the menu tonight?" Shepard demanded, his annoyance – and embarrassment – clear.

"How about canned tuna?" Joker called, ignoring Shepard's icy glare.

"Oui, oui!" the waiter said excitedly. "We could prepare you a really beautiful tuna salad."

"I have canned tuna at my apartment!" Shepard snapped before remembering he was entertaining guests. "Okay… do you at least have quarian and turian food? If not, we're taking our business elsewhere."

"Everything on ze dextro menu is available," the waiter declared proudly with a small bow, and Garrus and Tali begun to study their menus with interest.

"What about the House Special?" asked Shepard, realising he'd just trapped himself, and his friends, at this dive which, before the _incident_, had been one of the most exclusive venues on the Citadel. "There's a huge sign at the front _promising _a House Special every night."

"Man, I hope the House Special's canned tuna," Joker commented. "I _love _canned tuna."

"I heard places like this serve up varren covered in fish sauce," Grunt pitched in.

Shepard looked up at the ceiling, a pale blue aura surrounding him, and the crack in the ceiling widened as a small amount of water fell on Grunt and Joker, wetting their heads.

"_Not _cool, Commander!" Joker wailed, shaking himself off, while Grunt snickered at the pilot's wussy display.

The waiter bent down next to Shepard and lowered his voice. "Look, pal, we just got a delivery of somethin' out back. It smells fishy, looks pretty and we can jazz it up all you want."

"What is it?"

"Beats me, but we got it cheap, and it's guaranteed not to contain parasites or worms. Take it or leave it."

"I don't think s –" Shepard began before Tali cooed at something on her menu.

"Dextro protein tempura," she said wistfully. "My father once had that at an admiral's dinner. I always wanted to try it."

The waiter arched an eyebrow at Shepard, who gave him a murderous look. "_Fine_. The rest of us will have the House Special. You'd _better _jazz it up," he threatened. "Now, what about drinks?"

"We 'ave water," the waiter sniffed, reverting to his fake French accent.

"That's it?"

"Bottled or tap?" Kaidan asked innocently.

"Or bath?" EDI added. "Dish? Pond?"

"Is it recycled?" teased Traynor.

Shepard looked up again, but his move was pre-empted by Kaidan and Liara, who immediately threw up a barrier over the ceiling. No water fell, but several hairline cracks ran along the glass.

"If recycled piss is good enough for the krogans, it's good enough for the rest of you," growled Grunt, and Shepard looked in horror at Abby, finding to his relief that she was giggling. "You'd _better_ have alcoholic water here," Grunt said with a menacing look at the waiter, who almost jumped out of his skin.

"Uh… y-yes, sir, w-we can arrange that. I-I'll just…" He rushed around the table, hurriedly took Tali and Garrus's orders, and then darted out back.

"I'm sorry about this, Abby," Shepard began, but his guest couldn't reply as she was laughing so much.

"Please… don't… ap-ap-apuhuhu…" she stammered before completely losing control of herself and howling with laughter. James looked on, a delighted grin on his face.

"Glad to see _someone's_ grateful for my hospitality," Shepard said with a pointed look at the others.

"That statement is erroneous," EDI piped up. "This evening's entertainments are being paid for out of the Alliance expense account, not your own pocket, Shepard."

"_Thanks_ for clearing that up, EDI," grumbled the commander, giving a reluctant half-smile when Steve nudged his leg and whispered 'hot tub'.

"Here's to the Alliance expense account!" Joker toasted sarcastically, holding his bread roll aloft. "Seeing as we don't have a _drink_ yet."

Most of the others also held up their bread rolls and tapped them against their neighbours'. "To the Alliance expense account!"

Shepard crossed his arms, his eyes going back and forth between Steve and Abby, the only ones so far not to have joined in with the toast. He saw Abby's hand slowly move and then freeze when he looked at her. He looked back at Steve and when he returned his gaze to Abby, her hand had moved infinitesimally closer to her own bread roll. This game went on for a while, Abby and James's laughter getting louder with each turn. Eventually, Abby made a grab for her roll.

"It's only polite to salute the host," she teased, thrusting her roll into the air. "To the Alliance expense account!" she called, and the rest of the guests – Steve included – joined her in a second toast.

Shepard's eyes went to the ceiling directly above Abby and she gave him a look of mock fear, her hands pressed to her cheeks, before he relented and started to smile.

"To the damned Alliance expense account," he grunted, picking up his roll and throwing it at Joker, grazing the pilot's arm.

"Cheap shot!" Joker exclaimed, throwing the roll back at Shepard, hitting the commander squarely on the nose. Shepard blinked, momentarily stunned, and a tense silence descended over the table. "Shit, Commander, I…"

"Food fight!" Tali declared, and within seconds countless chunks of torn bread were flying across the tables.

By the time the waiters emerged from the kitchen with the drinks, everyone, even Shepard, was laughing, and the place looked like a massacre in a bakery. The two waiters exchanged a resigned look before carefully moving aside the piles of crumbs, setting down eleven glasses of water and one glass of neat vodka for Grunt.

"Now we can have a proper toast," Shepard said, holding his glass up, but he frowned when he noticed something floating in it. He set it down, cautiously peering over the rim.

"Looks like our drinks come with complimentary scales," Garrus noted.

"And algae," Steve added in disdain.

"Think I've found that eye of yours, Tali," Grunt announced before shrugging and knocking back the entire contents of his glass. Traynor, to his side, clamped a hand over her mouth and turned away, retching.

"I've had enough of this," Shepard decided and he started to rise, but at the same time the waiters appeared again, carrying two beautiful plates of food for Garrus and Tali. Shepard groaned inwardly and took his seat again as Tali sincerely thanked him for such a wonderful treat.

"Wonder what they've got in store for us?" James pondered.

"Hey, Cortez," Joker called over. "Heard anything from the Normandy?"

Steve shook his head. "Not yet."

"We are _not_ talking shop," Shepard interjected. "We're on shore leave. _For real_ shore leave."

Joker shrugged. "I know, Commander, but Cortez and I were talking about maybe sneaking back a little earlier, just to make sure those techs don't get too handy with our systems. Adams is in, too, and EDI goes without saying."

"_Nobody_ is going back early, understand?"

"Killjoy," moaned Joker.

"Oh, here comes our food," Liara breathed, clutching her growling belly as the waiters pushed out two trolleys and produced ten plates of something pink and iridescent, _jazzed up _with a lemon slice and sprig of parsley.

Another silence fell over the table, broken only by the clink of cutlery as Tali and Garrus savoured their meals.

"Uh, Commander?" James mumbled, poking the pink, quivering blob with his fork. "I'm pretty sure this is hanar. Don't touch it, Abby," he warned.

"It can't be," Shepard said with a frown. "EDI?"

The AI cued up her omni-tool, bringing up an analysis of the food on their plates. "It is not hanar, but originates from the same family."

"Is it a sentient species?"

"Negative."

The guests continued to stare at their plates, the silence again shattered by a loud belch from Grunt, who'd tipped his blob down his throat. "You gonna eat that?" he asked Traynor.

"E-excuse me," she stammered, shooting up from her chair, looking decidedly green around the gills. "I've just remembered something… I really should…" She clutched her belly. "Thanks for dinner, C-Commander!" she managed before running out.

Liara looked down at her own plate and also pushed herself up. "I should check on her," she said, rushing for the exit.

"And then there were ten," Joker remarked snarkily, his eyes widening as Shepard began to emit a blue glow. This time, nobody stopped him and Joker was once again drenched with water from the leaking ceiling as the crack in it lengthened. "Oh, come on!" he complained, shaking himself off.

"You were so eager to toast the Alliance expense account, Joker," said Shepard, "so I think _you_ should be the first to sample our meal. Wouldn't want to offend your host." He crossed his arms and stared down the pilot.

"Yeah, come on, Joker!" Kaidan joined in, "the honour of first tasting should go to you."

"Uh-uh," said Joker, shaking his head. "I got my Mobility Assistance Mech here. EDI, taste my food for me. You know, in case it's bad for my bones."

"I do not possess gustatory sensors," replied the AI, "therefore, a 'taste test' would be pointless."

"Doesn't matter. Just put some of it in your mouth so I know what the texture's like."

EDI examined her plate, glanced at Shepard and then back at Joker. "I believe the expression is, 'Kiss my intergluteal cleft'."

Everyone else with the exception of Joker and Shepard burst out laughing, and the commander leaned forward, pointing at the pilot. "Eat, Moreau," he ordered.

Joker raised his eyebrows. "'Moreau', huh? Wow. Kinda like my mom calling me 'Jeffrey' when I was acting up."

"My amp's getting twitchy," Shepard threatened.

"And mine's flickering," added Kaidan with a lopsided smile. "I might not be able to pull off a barrier this time."

"How the hell can a biotic amp flicker?" Joker asked in annoyance.

"It's an L2. They do that."

Joker shook his head and the rest of the guests began to bang the table in unison, chanting "Eat! Eat! Eat!"

"Damn it," he whimpered, realising he was out of options. "Okay," he groaned, cutting a slice and putting it in his mouth.

He began to chew, and the chanting stopped as his friends studied his face for a reaction. To their surprise, he nodded and began to cut his food into pieces. "It's actually pretty nice," he said casually.

"Oh, good!" Abby exclaimed enthusiastically, reaching for her fork, but Shepard touched her wrist, shaking his head.

"Hold that thought," he quietly told her before reaching for his cutlery and cutting a piece of blob, which he held on his fork close to his mouth, some of his friends doing the same. With narrowed eyes he carefully placed it in his mouth, followed by a few other diners at the table.

"What the hell?" Kaidan spluttered, spitting his mouthful out onto his napkin. "It tastes like… oh, God, I can't even…"

Shepard also spat out his morsel of the Saltiest Substance known to Man, his eyes streaming. "Water!" he bellowed, and the waiters rushed out of the kitchen door. "_Clean_ water!" he growled as he got to his feet, and they quickly scurried back to the kitchen. "Joker, open your mouth," he commanded. "You didn't react the same way as the rest of us."

"That is because he ate a piece of lemon peel," EDI provided.

"Oh, nice going, _Mom_!" Joker complained, folding his arms. "What the hell happened to discretion?"

"I am on shore leave," she explained simply.

"You _are _going to try this, Joker," Shepard promised as Kaidan also rose to his feet.

"No, I'm good, really," replied the pilot, looking decidedly nervous as the commander and major were surrounded by a blue aura.

"We insist," said Kaidan, and both biotics concentrated on the plates, Joker letting out a squeal as nine pink blobs rose into the air and headed straight for him.

"Not fair!" he yelled, scrambling from his chair and slipping on a puddle of water behind him, flailing on the floor as the blobs attached themselves to his face. "Waaagh! Get 'em off of me! I can taste salt! I _hate _salt! I totally have a sweet tooth!"

"What do you think, Major Alenko?" Shepard asked as the rest of the guests looked on in amusement. "As the ranking officer and all."

Kaidan brought a hand to his chin and seemed to ponder Shepard's question. "Well… as the ranking officer…"

"Get _on_ with it!" screamed Joker. "I can't take the saltiness!"

"It's my considered opinion that… hm… no, maybe that wouldn't work. I should reconsider…"

"Damn it, Kaidan!"

"All right, I've made a decision," announced the major. "Think I'll put it to the vote."

"What the… seriously?"

"My vote is that it's a damned waste of good food," Grunt opined.

"Commander?" Kaidan asked.

"Grunt's right," he answered. "It'd be nice if at least one of us enjoyed our meal."

"I enjoyed mine, Shepard," Garrus said, and Tali also added her own endorsement of her meal. "My vote is go with your heart," the turian teased.

By this time, Joker had successfully detached the blobs from himself and was sitting up on the floor, wiping fish-scented slime off his face and giving Shepard a decidedly black look.

"Let me help you clean up," Shepard offered with a wicked grin, his eyes moving to the ceiling.

"Oh, no, Commander! Come o –" Joker began before his words were literally drowned out by a deluge of water. "Okay! You made your point, Shepard! I don't wanna play anymore!"

"Adam," Steve warned, leaping to his feet," I don't like the look of that ceiling."

All eyes went upwards to the glass ceiling, which was by now covered in several large cracks, most of which were directly above the diners.

"Everyone under the tables!" commanded Shepard, grabbing Steve and bundling him to the floor, and James did the same with Abby, their friends following. Joker struggled on the slippery floor but was pulled under a table by EDI, just in the nick of time as a loud crash was heard and water pooled around their knees and hands.

"Your water, monsieur," one of the waiters was heard to say, along with another crash as a tray was dropped to the floor.

"Shit! _Shit_!" the other waiter cried. "Sir! You'd better get in here! It's happened again!"

The ten friends crouched beneath the table, several nervous sniggers bursting forth, as squelchy footsteps were heard rapidly approaching their location. Then, there was a long, weighty silence, followed by a strange screeching sound.

"Why?" wailed the manager, falling to his knees. "Whhhhhyyyy?"

~o~O~o~

The drenched diners waited outside, watching as the restaurant's sign was taken down for the second time. Shepard had stayed inside where he, the manager and several C-Sec officers had been talking for almost an hour.

Some of the friends had gone to dry off but Tali, Garrus, James, Abby and Steve had remained, and Liara had rejoined them after hearing about their activities.

"Sounds like you had fun," she said to James, who nodded, his eyes searching for Abby.

"Not sure if Joker appreciated it, but yeah, I thought it was pretty funny," he chuckled. "Excuse me a sec, Doc," he said, having spotted Abby leaning on a railing a short distance away.

He slowly approached her, noticing a faraway look in her eyes as he neared. "Hey."

"Oh, hey!" she answered, spinning around and grinning. James smiled back at her, but at the same time his stomach knotted and he didn't know why. "I haven't laughed so much in ages, James. I do feel for poor Joker, though."

"Don't worry about him. He and Shepard go way back. They're always messin' with each other," he said, moving closer to her. "You okay?" he asked lightly. "Tired?"

"No, I'm fine," she replied, not meeting his eyes. "Oh, Liara's back!" she exclaimed upon spotting her friend. "I wonder how Samantha is?"

"Let's go ask her," James suggested, watching Abby carefully as he followed her.

At that moment Shepard exited the restaurant, accompanied by four C-Sec officers, and briefly chatted with them before joining his friends. "Well, it's safe to say the Alliance expense account has been tapped out," he told them. "For about the next two hundred years. Oh, and we're barred for life."

"Kinda figured that out, Commander," James commented. "Well, I'm still hungry. Anybody wanna go for noodles? _Nice_ noodles," he added in an aside to Abby, who nodded her agreement.

"You go on ahead," replied Shepard, turning to Steve. "Ready to call it a night?"

"Absolutely," answered the pilot.

"You all got places to stay?" Shepard asked his friends, who all nodded. "Abby? What about you?"

"She'll be staying with me and Tali," Liara replied. "We've already booked a hotel suite."

"We know you and Steve want that apartment to yourselves," Tali teased.

Shepard laughed briefly. "Well, I hope you all enjoy the rest of your evening. Sorry the meal was a bit of a… washout."

"Seriously, Shepard?" Garrus groaned before turning to James. "Hey, Vega. How about we find the rest of you some food and then have a little tournament in the sim? And you still owe me a match, Abby."

"Why don't we all go?" Tali suggested, and the rest of them agreed.

"Have fun," Shepard said, and he and Steve bid their friends goodnight before heading to the apartment.

~o~O~o~

After changing into dry clothing, Steve and Shepard made themselves a quick supper of grilled cheese sandwiches, which they ate at the island in the centre of the kitchen.

"Sorry it wasn't quite the dinner we had planned," Adam said apologetically.

Steve smiled. "I don't care what we eat. I'm just glad we got a little time to ourselves."

"Amen to that."

"Abby had a blast, anyway," Steve noted. "She's really settled in, quite a feat considering our, uh, _eventful _lifestyle."

"Yeah," Shepard mumbled, a slight frown forming. "Steve, do you think she seems a little… distracted? Troubled, even?"

Steve thought about that for a minute. "Can't say I've noticed. Do you think she does?"

Shepard shrugged. "I dunno. Just a feeling. It's probably nothing."

Steve watched Adam for a moment before taking one of his hands. "You've got a night off. That means not worrying about everyone else. Now, I _believe_ you promised me a dip in the hot tub, not to mention a massage."

"I believe I did," Adam grinned. "Let me get the door."

Steve hopped off his stool and kissed Adam on the cheek. "Don't be too long," he whispered, turning and heading for the rear of the apartment.

"Oh, I won't." Adam also got off his stool and walked to the main door of the apartment, where he used the panel to lock it. Just as he was heading to join Steve, a light on his omni-tool began to blink. "Damn it," he growled under his breath, craning his neck to ensure Steve wasn't watching him. He quickly keyed the device, bringing up a text-only message from the Asari Councillor:

_Commander Shepard, I've been trying to reach you all evening. I need to speak with you at your earliest convenience. I know you're docked at the Citadel and I will answer your call whatever time you reply. Please contact me as soon as you're able. This is very important._

"Well, that's a no-brainer," he said quietly to himself, remembering the politican's refusal to attend the summit he'd held with the turians and krogans, something _he'd_ considered 'very important'. "Sorry, Madam Councillor, but I have an appointment with a hot pilot in a hot tub."

He removed the omni-tool from his arm before tossing it onto a nearby couch and turning off the lights at the front of the apartment.


	16. Awakenings

**Awakenings**

**The Ascension Hotel, The Citadel, 3:40am **

She awoke in an unfamiliar place, to unfamiliar sounds and smells. Lights blinked in her vision, too quickly for her eyes to latch onto before they were gone and she was left alone, frightened, in the blackness. A voice called her name, a voice she thought she knew but she didn't dare to trust anything. Where was she? Who was calling her? And how did they know her name?

"Abby? What's wrong? Come on, it's me! It's Tali!"

"Go away!" she yelled, her voice deep and guttural. "Leave me alone!"

"Wake up!" the voice called, more urgently this time. "Liara! I can't wake her! Something's wrong with her!"

She knew the names; she knew the voices, but they weren't the same as her… not any more. She'd changed – _improved_ – and they didn't understand. They didn't _want_ to understand. All they wanted to do was harm her and she knew she could silence them in a heartbeat. All she had to do was open her eyes.

She did so, slowly, and found a woman with no face looming over her, the blackness snaking out of her in gossamer-fine tendrils, so seductive and beautiful as they caressed Abby's face, inviting her to join them, to be damned with them, to know the eternal void as they did.

"No!" she snarled, grabbing the faceless woman by the shoulders. "_You're_ the blackness!" she accused, and instantly she knew, instinctively, what had to be done. She released the woman and arched her back, her arms flung above her head as her body came apart, its bones splintering and cracking, blood and lymph leaking out of her as she became a conduit of rage and hatred, her malevolence concentrated into a red beam of death which thundered out of her, annihilating everything in its path.

It was quiet. The woman with no face was gone.

And then she was screaming and thrashing around, her arms held at her sides by warm hands. "Abby! Snap out of it!" commanded Liara, her voice harsh with worry and fear.

"EDI! The lights!" Abby wailed, her voice and body trembling. "EDI! Why won't you answer me? Where are you!"

"Turn the lights up," Liara instructed Tali, who raced to a small panel on the wall. "You're safe," the asari assured Abby, who'd slowed her struggling, her eyes still squeezed closed. "The lights are on, now. The blackness is gone."

"W-Where's EDI?"

"EDI isn't here, we're in the hotel, do you remember?" Liara asked softly, panting slightly from the effort of restraining her friend. "It's over, Abby, you can open your eyes. It's just me and Tali, your friends. We would never hurt you."

"T-Tali?" Abby whispered, daring to open her eyes and finding Liara's kind face, marred with lines of concern, above her. "What have I done?" she shrieked, sitting bolt upright and clasping Liara's arms. "I-I killed her! I… oh, Maker, no!"

"Abby! I'm right here!" Tali exclaimed, sitting down next to her on the bed. "I'm safe! Nothing happened to me!"

Abby gawked at the quarian, blinking several times, not trusting her eyes. She raised a hand to touch Tali's mask, finding it felt solid, _real_. "But I…"

"You had a nightmare," Liara explained as Abby's lower lip quivered, her face crumpling as two nights of broken sleep caught up with her.

"Now I can see why you didn't want to go to bed last night," Tali said softly, resting a hand on Abby's shoulder.

"No, I'm okay, I've always had nightmares," Abby quickly protested, "and I'm getting enough sleep, I know I am, I'm fine, really," she said, her words tumbling out in rapid succession. "It's only since we went to Eden Prime that they've really been bad, but I can cope with it, really, I can."

Liara stood up, closing her eyes for a second before opening them and sighing. "Of course. I should have known. I'm so sorry, Abby. I should have anticipated this."

"What? Anticipated what?"

"Shepard also had nightmares after his experience on Eden Prime, and I believe he played down the true horror of them. I think… there may be a way I can help you, but I'll need to speak with him first."

"No," Abby breathed, scrambling out of bed, standing up and facing Liara. "I won't have Adam involved in this. He has enough to worry about."

"He would want to know about this," Tali said in support of Liara.

"I can help you," Liara reiterated, "or at least make the nightmares less terrifying. I gave Shepard what's known as a cipher, which helped him understand his vision and make sense of it all. I can give it to you as well, but I won't do it without Shepard's knowledge. He would be furious if I left him out of this."

"Then I won't have it," Abby declared stubbornly.

"But you cannot go on like this," argued Liara. "Shepard told me that he went for weeks with only two or three hours' sleep per night, because he couldn't go back to sleep after experiencing a nightmare. He had them every night, Abby, sometimes several times a night. Is that what you want? Every night? For weeks?"

Abby exhaled slowly before shaking her head, her shoulders sagging. "No. I don't think I could live like that."

"Then you must allow me to give you the cipher."

Abby sat back down, Tali at her side as Liara began to pace. "Will you not budge, Liara? Will you insist that Adam be involved?"

"I'm afraid I must," answered Liara.

"Then… please wait until shore leave is over," she appealed. "I want Adam to have a rest. He looked so exhausted when he returned from Rannoch."

Liara looked at Abby doubtfully.

"Please," she repeated. "He and Steve are spending some precious time together, and James and I have made plans for tomorrow… well, I suppose it's today, now." She held her hands up to prove they were no longer shaking. "I'm fine. I know it was a nightmare and that it wasn't real. Maybe I'll be a bit tired for the next day or so, that's all, but I can hide it. I don't want Adam or James to worry about me. When shore leave is finished, I'll do whatever you want."

Liara was quiet for a minute as she considered Abby's words. "I agree that Shepard needs a break, but…"

"I'm not going to budge either, Liara. I'm sorry. I'm so grateful that you want to help me, but I'm not going to let a few silly dreams ruin everybody's shore leave. Please tell me you understand."

Tali watched Liara and leaned forward. "_Liara_, she's not asking for much."

Liara studied Abby for a quiet moment, finally nodding once. "I do understand, of course I do, but I will ask you to do me a favor in return. If anything else happens, or the dreams worsen, you'll notify me immediately. We won't wait, regardless of shore leave. Do you agree?"

"That sounds reasonable," Abby replied. "Very well, then. I give you my word, Liara. Now give me yours that you won't tell Adam about this until we return to the Normandy."

"If nothing else occurs, then yes, you have my word. Reluctantly given, but genuinely nonetheless."

Abby let out a heavy sigh as Tali squeezed her hand. "I care about Adam, and James, and don't want to worry them unnecessarily."

"Yes, I can see that," Liara replied. "It is good to know that you are so protective of Shepard. I just hope it's not to your own detriment."

An awkward silence hung in the air before Tali stood up. "I think we could all do with a drink," she said, moving to the kitchen area. "A strong one."

"Let me help you with that," Abby offered, rising and joining Tali, leaving Liara to her thoughts.

**Shepard's apartment, a few hours later**

Adam had brewed coffee and was frying bacon when Steve entered the kitchen, scratching his head and yawning.

"Well, good morning," Adam greeted, smiling at the bleary-eyed pilot, who smiled back and moved to his side. "I didn't want to wake you. You were snoring like a krogan with bronchitis."

"Yeah, well, this 'being in charge' thing is pretty tiring," chuckled Steve as he peered at the contents of the pan. "I like mine crispy, by the way."

"I _know _how you like it." Shepard winked, turning his head slightly, and received a peck on the cheek for his trouble.

"Need me to do anything?" Steve asked.

"Let me think... how about you grab some coffee, sit there and look sexy?" he teased, pointing at one of the stools next to the central island.

"That, I can do." Steve went over to the coffee pot and poured two cups before taking them to the island and sitting down. "You showered yet?" he asked Shepard, who was only wearing a pair of pajama pants.

"Can't you tell?"

"I can, that's why I asked," joked Steve, laughing when Shepard turned around and gave him a mock-glare.

"I thought we could, uh, conserve water by showering together," Adam explained. "You know, for the good of the galaxy. And you've very considerately removed all of your clothes except for your briefs. Your very _tight_ briefs," he added happily with another backward glance at Cortez.

"Actually, I put them _on_ to come out here in case any passing sky cars got an eyeful and crashed. Now, what were you saying about conserving water again? Because, as you know, I'm very conscientious about that kind of thing."

"Yeah, same here," Shepard replied unconvincingly. "Want pancakes?"

"Sure." Steve's attention was caught by a winking green light from one of the couches near the main windows. "Uh… I hate to tell you this, but your omni-tool's going nuts."

Shepard let out a soft sigh. "I know. I'm trying not to think about it, at least until after breakfast."

"Think the asari councillor's still after you?"

Shepard transferred the bacon to a plate and shrugged. "Probably."

Steve watched Adam for a minute and could see by his posture he wasn't completely relaxed. "Maybe you should answer it."

Shepard turned around and quickly glanced at the couch before looking at Steve. "I promised you –"

"– An uninterrupted night, and a terrific night it was. Thank you for that. Now go answer it. I know it's playing on your mind. It's fine, Adam, really."

Shepard frowned, knowing he'd have to deal with it eventually. "You sure?"

Steve nodded. "Go on. I'll start the pancakes." He hopped off the stool and, carrying his coffee, moved to the cooktop.

"Thank you." Adam wrapped his arms around Steve's neck and kissed him soundly before stroking his cheek and moving to the couch. With another sigh, he picked up his omni-tool, fitted it to his arm and cued it up, immediately receiving instructions to standby. After a few seconds, the face of the asari councillor appeared on a small screen above the device.

"Commander, where have you been? I've been trying to reach you all night," she said, sounding impatient.

"You've reached me now," he replied dourly, irritated by her tone and doing nothing to hide it.

"Yes, yes, I have," she began, deliberately softening her voice. "Would you… like to get dressed first?"

"No. What can I do for you?"

She watched him for a second and sighed. "I would prefer to speak with you in person. Can you meet me in Councillor Udina's office?"

He shook his head. "I'm on leave and I just woke up. You're going to have to give me more than that."

"In that case, Commander, I apologize for disturbing you, but this is a matter of the utmost importance." She paused and glanced from side to side. "I have information that could greatly improve your chances of acquiring the Catalyst."

His face dropped, his heart skipping a beat. "What kind of information?"

"As I'm sure you can appreciate, I would prefer not to discuss it over this channel."

"Right," he nodded. "Where do you want to meet up?"

"I'm at Udina's office now, Commander. I'll tell my aides to expect you."

"Okay. I'll be there soon. Shepard out."

He deactivated the device and stared ahead for a moment, hearing the soft padding of feet behind him.

"Something important?" Steve asked cautiously.

Shepard turned around to face him. "Yeah, it could be. I need to go. I'm sorry."

Cortez nodded. "Go get a quick shower, and I'll have a bite ready for when you're done."

Shepard grabbed one of Steve's hands and started leading him to the shower room. "No… we can still shower together, although I'm afraid a shower's all I've got time for."

"Hey, I'll take whatever I can get," Steve quipped, raising a strained smile from Shepard as they left the kitchen together.

~o~O~o~

James had long ago recognized that women and the Alliance didn't mix all that well, at least not for him.

In his humble opinion, he wasn't the best at multitasking and both women, and the Alliance, required a high level of that. Admitting that he could only be good with one but not both, he'd made a choice a few years ago, one that had simplified everything. Flings were great but love just didn't fit into his plans.

It'd been tricky at first, because habits can be hard to break, and women were one of his favorite habits. He knew though, that while he loved women – and he did _love_ women, the way they walked, the way they smelled and the way they felt in his arms – he wanted success in the Alliance more, so ultimately, choosing to not get involved in relationships wasn't that hard a decision for him.

At least, not until Abby Cousland had come along; now his decision was slowly killing him.

He'd kissed her in the Med Bay and she'd kissed him in the lounge. There'd been shared moments since, each wonderful and staggering, and there was a definite heat building between them, but it was more than sexual tension.

It was, he'd begun to realize, love. And not the kind where you make eyes at each other and fall into bed, only to have things fizzle a few weeks later. No, this… this was the kind of love that changed things.

The kind that changed _everything_.

That was when he'd started to panic, when he'd recognized she was important to him, more than anything he'd ever thought to look for. Not that his panic had managed to slow things down between them. Panic was oddly easy to ignore when she was smiling at him, because damn, he loved that smile. Instead of running for the hills, like his panic told him to do, he'd found himself tripping over ways to make her grin, or to hear her laugh, or for _any_ excuse he could find that may result in a chance to kiss her.

So, despite knowing full well he was falling for her and despite the promises he'd made to himself to always put his career first, he'd still happily tossed himself off the proverbial cliff.

It wasn't something he could have prevented, even if he'd wanted to, which he _didn't_. The situation wasn't improved when he realized that she seemed to feel the same way about him. Now, it seemed, they were both in deep, but he knew neither one of them regretted it.

When they'd docked at the Citadel the day before, Shepard had been hell bent on making sure everyone got some real shore leave. It had been a great twenty-four hours so far, from the farcical night out at the sushi place, to a chance to redeem himself at the Armax arena.

Shepard hadn't been able to join them there, despite his intent to and, predictably, his plans for a day off had been foiled. The asari councillor had requested an urgent visit, so the commander had been forced to leave, but Steve and the rest of the crew had made the most of the time and everyone had really had fun.

After their rounds were through, James had seen the perfect chance for him and Abby to spend the rest of the day alone together and, sneaking off, he'd shown her around the Citadel.

They'd spent the afternoon in the wards, her hand in his, and he'd watched her beautiful eyes light up with each new discovery. It'd been an amazing day, one of the best of his life, but then Cortez had buzzed his omni-tool and his day with Abby became a lot more complicated.

"_Hey man, listen. We're going to be recalled soon, the commander's still sorting out the details. Shepard wanted me to tell you not to bother heading back to the ship, he wants Abby to have some fun while she still can. I'm transmitting you the pass key code for the door to the apartment; you two can stay there. Shepard's transferring some credits to you for Abby to spend on a souvenir or something."_

"_What's going on?"_

"_I don't know all the details, but he's adamant that you two enjoy the rest of the day, or longer, if it works out. He's got a few things left to do on the Citadel, and with Liara, before we're wheels up anyway, so no sense in spoiling a chance for you and Abby to have a break."_

"_Okay, sure, thanks, but what about everybody else?"_

"_If they're needed between now and our departure, Traynor will get the update and let everyone know. In the meantime, everyone else will stay on shore leave and will be recalled when it's time."_

"_Any idea how long?"_

Steve shook his head. _"No, but it can't be too soon, since he's not recalling everyone yet. Now, quit talking to me and spend time with Abby. I'll be in touch when I have to be, and until then, don't do anything I wouldn't do."_

James had gaped at his friend, his mouth moving slowly. "_Uh, are you… we're supposed to spend the night?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Together?"_

Steve arched an eyebrow. _"Yes, Vega, that's the idea."_

"_And the commander's cool with that?"_

Steve shot James a strange look. "_Yeah, I mean, if Abby's okay with it, then that's up to you two. Shepard just wanted you to know that she can stay at the apartment and you're welcome as well."_

"_Uh, okay, yeah. Right."_

Steve had slowly grinned. "_James. Are you alright? There are three bedrooms and it's about a two-thousand square foot apartment, it's not like you'll have to share a sleeping pod or anything. And you can always go back to the VOQ, you know."_

"_Yeah, right, I know that,"_ he'd replied, blushing. "_Okay, thanks, Esteban. I'll, uh, I mean, we'll see you guys when you get back."_

Now, hours later, it was getting late and he was walking Abby to the apartment.

"It should be interesting," she commented softly as they rode the elevator up. "I've only been there once and I was a bit in awe the entire time."

He grinned. "Yeah, I was thinking about that earlier. I remember how you ignored us all and focused on the windows."

She smiled gently in return. "Yes, I can't imagine how I missed seeing you until later," she replied, taking his hand. "It must have been that dragon I'd taken to the head."

"Must have been."

She leaned in and slowly kissed his cheek, looking up at him from under her lashes. "Thank you for showing me around today," she whispered, staying close.

He leaned in, his lips hovering just above hers, their noses grazing. "Sure thing," he breathed as his mouth took hers in a kiss. Her arms wound around his thick neck and she opened her mouth, allowing him to taste her.

The elevator stopped.

He opened his eyes as the doors slid open behind her and he broke the kiss.

"James?" she rasped, still wrapped in his arms.

"Time to get off," he said with a smile, gesturing to the open doors.

She glanced over her shoulder and giggled, still not letting go of him. "Oh, right."

He kept his arm around her waist as they went to the apartment door and he opened it. As the door slid shut behind them, she walked over to the windows, placing her hand against the glass.

He watched her for a moment, remaining near the keyboard of the piano, and saw how the neon lights cast a glow around her. "You're beautiful standing there, Abby."

She slowly turned to face him. "James, may I tell you something?" she asked as she approached, moving to the piano, her fingers trailing lightly across the keys.

"You can tell me anything," he replied huskily. She stopped right in front of him and he could smell her perfume.

"I can't stop thinking about you. I want to be with you all the time. I worry when you leave for a mission and I miss you when you're gone. I know it may seem mad – we've only known each other for a short time – but I feel if I don't say something I may burst."

His heart skipped a beat as he reached for her, pulling her to him.

"It's not crazy, Abby, I... I feel the same way," he admitted as he cupped her chin, tracing her lips with his thumb. "Sure, we just met, but when you're with me, everything'sright. _We're_ right." He picked her up and gently set her on the keyboard, the piano emitting several soft notes.

She pulled at his waist, bringing him to stand between her thighs, his hands bracing against the glossy black wood.

"I want you," she breathed, turning her head and kissing his wrist as he cradled her cheek. "Please, James, I want to be yours. Don't leave, stay with me tonight."

They kissed again and he ran his hands up through her hair, gently grasping a handful and tilting her head back, exposing her neck to his lips. He trailed kisses down her jaw as she pressed herself against him, eager for his touches.

Laying her back against the piano he moved his mouth to her collarbone and she whimpered as his hand cupped her breast.

"James," she moaned, moving her body against his weight. She wanted his touch but something occurred to him and he pulled away.

"Abby," he panted, trying to focus despite her pulling at him. "Have you been with a man before?"

She met his eyes and he helped her sit up.

"Abby, have you been with a man?" he repeated, his eyes searching hers.

She shook her head. "I'm… I have… I am not without some experience," she confessed, her eyes lowered.

He turned her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes. "You know what I'm asking, don't you?"

She nodded. "I don't care. I want _you_, James. Stay."

His body ached at her words but he still held back. "Are you sure?"

Again she nodded. "Yes, James. I want it to be you. I want to belong to _you_."

He rested his forehead against hers, his eyes shut tightly as he reined in his desire. "To each other, we'll belong to each other," he growled. He opened his eyes and scooped her up. "But not on a piano, not the first time."

Turning, he carried her to the bedroom at the back of the apartment, where he gently laid her onto the bed. She pulled him down with her and he braced himself over her, carefully aware of his size. She parted her legs and he settled comfortably against her, her hands winding around his middle, bringing him into a kiss.

She was pulling at him, trying to free his shirt from his waistband, her fingers finally freeing his cotton shirt. She grazed her fingertips against his warm skin, every touch seeming electric to him.

"I want to see you," she whispered against his lips.

"Tell me you're sure," he rasped, lifting his head. "Tell me again."

"I want you to make love to me, James," she breathed as his mouth took hers and they surrendered to their passion.

**xXx**

**The following morning**

His omni-tool was softly pinging, pulling them from their sated sleep. He stretched a long arm over to the nightstand and picked up the device, reading the message from Traynor.

It was time to head back to the Normandy.

"Are you okay?" she whispered, kissing his brow.

He laughed quietly and raised his head, kissing her once as he rolled her onto her back. "I'm the one who should be asking you," he replied, smiling down at her. "Not the other way around."

She matched his smile, realizing that she'd slept peacefully, with no nightmares. "I'm wonderful."

"God knows that's true," he chuckled, watching her blush as he braced his elbows and adjusted his weight so she wasn't pressed into the mattress. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, you took very good care of me," she whispered, caressing his face. "And now I know what all those poets were always going on about," she confessed with a cheeky grin.

He grunted in pleasure, kissing the corner of her mouth. "Flatterer," he teased as she giggled.

"Hardly, I feel amazing," she argued. "Even if I could tell you were holding back. You didn't have to."

"Yeah, I did, but next time… next time it'll be a lot better for you."

"Better?" she replied, shaking her head. "I guess one really can die of pleasure," she finished in a sultry tone, kissing him.

He rolled them over again, now cradling her in his arms. "Abby?"

"Hmm?"

"We need to get back."

"Is that what your message was?"

"Yeah," he replied softly. "But before we go, before this is…" he snorted softly, not sure what to say. "I feel like we're in a bubble in here, I don't want to leave."

She smiled softly, kissing the side of his chest. "I wish we could stay."

"Look, I don't know a lot about Ferelden, but I do know… I mean, I understand what this, ah, what we just did, and you choosing me..." he paused, studying her as he tried to tell her how he felt. "I know this is… I know what you've given me, Abby."

Her eyes fluttered shut, her naked body soft in his arms. "You're who I'm meant to be with," she breathed, her eyes slowly opening again. "I can't explain how or why I know that, but I do, James. It's one of the few things I'm certain of. How or why I'm here? Maybe I'll never know, but you, Maker, I know I was meant to find you."

His nostrils flared as he struggled with the emotions her words stirred in his chest. Resting his forehead against hers, he caressed her cheek.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."


	17. Behind Every Great Man

**Behind Every Great Man...**

**Thessia, Parnitha System**

Following two hours of intense fighting, and after witnessing several asari commandos give their lives to aid Shepard, EDI and Liara in reaching the temple, the threesome finally arrived at its entrance. While Liara and EDI worked on gaining access to the ancient monument, Shepard took a step back and glanced at the trail of slaughter left in their wake.

He looked back at the temple, hoping that whatever lay inside, whatever it was that might unlock the Catalyst and complete the Crucible, would give the commandos' - everyone's - sacrifices meaning.

It would mean that finally the cycles would be broken, and all those who'd given their lives would be remembered. Civilization would go on and, although the Reapers wouldn't go down easily and many worlds would need to be rebuilt, at least there would be people around to do it.

He sighed, glancing over at his two companions, who appeared to have almost gained entry to the temple. He knew he shouldn't put all of his hopes into the artifact the asari councillor had mentioned during their meeting, but she'd hinted very strongly at its importance without saying it outright. Shepard was certain she knew more than she was letting on, and right now that very fact was giving him hope, even though he knew it shouldn't.

He was done seeing good people die. If this artifact could prevent just one more senseless death…

"Shepard," EDI called over. "We have bypassed the force field. Ready to enter the temple on your command."

"Lead the way, EDI," he replied as he joined the ladies, and they walked inside together.

**The Normandy, Port Observation Lounge**

Abby gazed down at the battle below, the beautiful hues of Liara's home planet mutilated by the horrific scene unfolding before her. The flurry of battle ships, cruisers and support ships engaged with the staggeringly massive Reapers inspired nothing short of awestruck terror in her heart.

Her head was throbbing. The pain had been steadily growing over the last two hours, her stomach now rolling with nausea each time she blinked her eyes and the throbbing unrelenting. Resting her forehead against the cool metal of the frame of the window, she closed her eyes and inhaled slowly, seeking to ease her agony but finding no relief.

Opening her eyes, she whimpered at the brightness of the room and moaned. "Maker, please," she whispered, stepping back, roughly rubbing the center of her forehead with the ball of her hand, the sickening pressure nearly too much to bear. Her eyes screwed shut as she again felt nauseous, a new dizziness overtaking her.

A vision flashed before her mind, one that she instantly realized was related to the nightmares she'd been experiencing since Eden Prime. Machines surrounded her, the sounds of the movement violent and grinding, metal on metal screeching and screaming inside her head.

She cried out and fell backward against the arm of the couch. Opening her eyes, the images faded, though the monstrous noises still echoed in her ears as her vision returned. Staggering to the bar, she reached for the small sink there, stumbling as she grasped the faucet, cold water rushing out.

Splashing water on her face, she panted, her heart hammering in her chest as she slowly looked up, spying her dripping features in the reflection of the shiny countertop. Trembling, she saw her cheek was torn, metal glinting from beneath the flesh.

"I'm awake, I'm awake!" she whimpered, trying to regain control of herself.

The machines thundered around her, the smell of blood and heat seared her nose and the ground beneath her feet shook as the red-eyed monsters above her looked down. She screamed, slapping her hands over her ears as they deafened her with their noise.

Her senses overwhelmed, she fell to her knees. "I'm on the ship," she panted, closing her eyes tightly against the onslaught of it all. "I'm on the… it's not… " she rasped, her voice weak. "EDI… help…"

~o~O~o~

**Temple of Athame**

Having reached the altar of the temple, Shepard stepped forward to examine an artifact set beneath a gigantic statue of the goddess Athame. While he concentrated on that, Liara gave a brief explanation of the deity's doctrines, while EDI scanned the local area.

As she did so, the AI briefly glanced at Shepard, noticing that he did not appear to be paying attention to what Liara was saying. Taking a step closer, she also observed that his eyes were closed and that he was in a state of deep concentration – or was struggling against something.

"Shepard," she called, quickly moving to his side and grabbing his arm. The commander staggered back, steadied by EDI's other arm around his waist, and blinked several times as though dazed.

"Thanks," he mumbled, looking up at the statue and catching his breath.

"Shepard? Are you all right?" asked Liara, rushing forward.

Without looking at her, he shook his head, tension apparent in his shoulders. "There's a prothean beacon here," he rasped.

"What? There can't be," scoffed the asari. "Are you certain?"

"It's not something you forget," he replied, tightness in his voice as he turned around. "What is this doing here, Liara? Why are your people hiding it?"

"I… don't know," she answered hesitantly, sensing his anger.

"The asari councillor knew about this, didn't she? Why didn't she come to me with this sooner? The information contained in this beacon could end the war!" he exclaimed, while EDI moved next to the base of the statue, her omni-tool working.

"The beacon's presence on the asari homeworld would explain asari superiority in fields of science, technology and many other areas," the AI postulated.

"Yeah," Shepard grunted, turning his back on Liara, knowing none of this was her fault, but that fact did nothing to ease his frustration. "EDI, let's see what this panel does. The information here doesn't belong to the asari – it belongs to everyone."

"Shepard, we don't know everything," Liara began defensively just as EDI's scans caused the panel at the base of the statue to light up, and a fine trembling was felt beneath their feet, quickly increasing in intensity.

"Fall back!" Shepard ordered, ushering EDI off the raised platform they were standing on. They moved to a safe distance with Liara, watching as a large crack appeared in the statue, and waited until the trembling had ceased.

"There are other artifacts here," said Liara, looking around. "Perhaps if we activate them in a similar way…"

"Spread out," he directed his companions, and they began their search.

Several minutes later, all of the artifacts had been activated and Shepard, Liara and EDI watched as the giant statue finally crumbled, revealing the beacon in its entirety.

"EDI," Shepard began, "I want you -"

"One moment," she interrupted, her attention elsewhere as she took a step away from her two companions. "Abby is in need of medical assistance on the Normandy," she informed Shepard, turning back to him.

"What do you mean? What happened?"

At the same moment, a shimmering green sphere rose from the beacon and gravitated towards Shepard, halting in front of him. Slowly, the sphere metamorphosed into a humanoid shape, and Shepard stepped forward to meet it. "Inform Dr. Chakwas," he ordered the AI, knowing he couldn't afford to be distracted now.

"Done," answered EDI.

"Good," he replied, turning to face the prothean VI. "Now, what _are_ you?"

~o~O~o~

**The Normandy**

James was knocking on the door of the lounge, concerned that Abby hadn't answered his message on her omni-tool. She should have been expecting him, as they'd planned on grabbing a quick bite together when he'd finished with a few upgrades to his armor, and he'd sent her a note over twenty minutes ago.

"Abby?" he called out, knocking against the metal door again before stepping back, his hands now shoved into his pockets. "Hey, uh, EDI? Is Abby in there?"

"Out of my way, Lieutenant!"

James spun around as Dr. Chakwas hurried toward him. "EDI!" she barked. "Open the door!"

"What's wrong?" he demanded as the doors slid open. "What's happening?"

Dr. Chakwas ran past him, not answering. "Abby?" she called, James behind her.

"Where the hell is she? What's going on? Hey!"

Chakwas moved around the room, rounding the bar and dropping to her knees, her omni-tool coming on. "She's here! Abby! Can you hear me?"

He flew to them, sliding to Abby's side, his hands grabbing her shoulders. "Abby! Wake up!"

"Stop, James, let me run these scans," Chakwas said stiffly. "She's alive, but let me get her vitals without you shaking her!"

"Doc!"

Abby began to tremble, slightly at first, but the motion grew more violent, until she was jarring even James, who was holding her tightly. He pulled her into his arms as she quaked, Chakwas running scans.

"It's a seizure, James, be careful not to restrain her, it could get worse."

"A seizure? What the hell is happening? Abby!"

His eyes darted back and forth between Abby and Chakwas, the doctor frowning at the readout on her omni-tool as Abby's motion slowed. "I've administered a sedative," Chakwas informed James, who nodded absently, his eyes glued to Abby. "I'm detecting some unusual activity in the hippocampus and anomalous readings in her EEG."

"In English?" he demanded.

Chakwas conducted a further examination of her patient, who remained unconscious, before answering. "Abby's readings are very similar to those found in Commander Shepard before he received the cipher from Liara, but Abby's reaction is much more severe."

"Doc!" he exclaimed in exasperation.

"In short, she's stable for now but I believe she needs Liara's intervention, and urgently. EDI, when is the landing party due to return?"

"The landing party is preparing to depart the planet's surface."

"I meant what's their ETA?" Chakwas asked impatiently.

"Pretty damn soon, I'd guess," Joker broke in. "We just picked up Cerberus signatures in orbit but they jumped to FTL before we could get a fix on them. Bastards beat us to the punch. Shepard's in full 'Strong and Silent' mode, so I'm not askin'. He's pissed as hell, I figured that much out."

"I'll get Liara when they're here," James rasped, lifting Abby into his arms. Chakwas led the way out of the lounge, directing James to place Abby onto a bed once they'd entered the med bay. Gently, he laid her down, stroking her cheek. "I'll be right back, Chula, I promise, don't you worry, okay? Doc's got you," he whispered unsteadily. Turning to Chakwas, he straightened up. "Take care of her Doc, I'll be in the shuttle bay," he stated as he hurried out of the door.

~o~O~o~

James stalked the hangar, his eyes moving to the external bay doors which had just started to open. This meant Cortez had started his approach sequence, and if James knew his friend, it'd take exactly one minute and fifteen seconds before the Kodiak touched down, just as regulations recommended.

"Bend the rules just this once, Esteban!" he implored the empty bay, squinting to see the tiny blue dot among the stars that was slowly growing bigger. "Come on!" he shouted.

He knew that the mission on Thessia hadn't gone well, but didn't know the details, nor had he hung around long enough to hear them. Abby was in trouble, and no matter what had happened on the surface, he knew Shepard and Liara would rush to her aid. They _had _to.

If only Esteban would stop being so fucking precise for once in his life!

He activated his omni-tool and connected with the Kodiak, not even waiting for Steve's face to appear before he spoke. "Esteban, step on it! I need… what the hell?" he exclaimed as the comm. link was broken.

His omni-tool began to vibrate, then, and he retrieved a text-only message, sent from Cortez:

_Knock it off, James. Now's not the time._

"Son of a-!"

What was going on? Had something happened on Thessia? Had someone been hurt… or worse?

The anxiety that was already burning his stomach intensified and it seemed to take forever before the Kodiak penetrated the barrier on the external door, finally landing.

The hatch went up, and Shepard almost knocked it off its hinges as he jumped out of the shuttle. "Sir," James began, trying to catch his attention.

"Not now, James! Joker, get us the hell out of here," he growled, striding towards the elevator.

"Don't need to tell me twice, Commander. Anywhere in partic –"

"I don't _care_. Just _do_ it."

"Right. Setting course for the Athena relay. Maybe I'll punch in 'mystery tour' and see what comes up, huh?"

"Lose the wisecracks and get us out of here, goddamit!" Shepard exclaimed angrily. "Now!"

"Aye, aye, Commander," Joker replied soberly before cutting the comm.

An uneasy silence settled over the hangar and James's eyes moved back and forth between the elevator – where the commander was waiting, his forearm covering his face as it rested against the bulkhead – and the Kodiak, as EDI stepped out.

"Hey," James quietly called. "What's going on?"

"One moment," answered the AI, who turned back toward the shuttle and waited for Liara to step out.

"Shit," James muttered, shocked by Liara's demeanour, her cornflower-blue skin much paler than usual. He quickly approached the Kodiak but stopped slightly short of the two ladies, not knowing what to say or what the hell was going on.

"I will escort you to your office," EDI offered, and Liara blankly nodded, her eyes glazing over.

"You okay, Liara?" James asked in concern, looking across the bay as the elevator door closed and Shepard departed.

"Yes, thank you, I'm…" she looked up at James, confusion and desolation in her eyes. "There's nothing left… nothing at all," she said in a fractured whisper.

"Come with me," EDI directed and Liara nodded again, following the AI away from James. He watched them for a moment, not unsympathetic to Liara's obvious upset, but Abby's condition took precedence in his mind and he rushed forward, stopping in front of them.

"'Scuse me, Liara, I don't know what happened and I'm sorry, but Abby needs your help."

She halted and blinked several times, her mouth slack. "I… don't think I can… I don't…"

"Liara," James said more firmly, clasping her arms. "You can call me a heartless bastard all you want when this is done, but whatever you're going through, I need you to put it aside for now. _Please_. Abby had a seizure," he told her, his voice catching, "and the doc says you're the only one who can help her. She needs the cipher, and Chakwas says you're the one who could give it to her."

She looked up, meeting James's eyes, and nodded slowly. "Yes, yes, I understand. I… I want to help. Just tell me where to go," she mumbled.

"Right this way, Doc," he said softly, hooking her arm through his.

~o~O~o~

A short time later, James returned to the hangar, frowning when he noticed that Cortez wasn't working on the Kodiak, which he always did immediately after returning from a mission. James walked up to the craft and raised the hatch, peering into the cockpit. Cortez was still in his seat, his arms folded as he stared up at the ceiling.

"That you, James?"

"Yeah." He stepped inside and took a seat in the co-pilot's chair.

"I thought you'd gone."

"I did, I went to sick bay, but Chakwas kicked me out," he answered, desperate to blurt out what had happened to Abby, but he'd noticed an odd note in Cortez's voice, and that his pilot friend was slumped in his seat like he had the weight of the galaxy on his shoulders.

"I know I'm distracted, man, and I probably will be for a while, but you okay? I mean, what the hell happened down there?" James asked, his eyes flitting back to the hangar doors, his mind still on Abby.

Cortez shook his head. "It's bad, James. Real bad. Thessia's lost. The Reapers are there in droves. It's gone, man, just gone." He shook his head again and sighed.

"Gone? What do you… you mean all of it? What about the commandos? The scientists?" James demanded, and they shared a few moments of silence, Cortez failing to provide an answer. "But… did Shepard find the artifact?" He watched Steve for a beat and then leaned closer, nudging his arm. "_Tell_ me they found the artifact, Esteban."

"It was another beacon," Steve mumbled disconsolately. "Yeah, they got the information from it. Then the Illusive Man and his indoctrinated goon took it off them and destroyed the temple. They were lucky to get out in one piece."

"The fuck?" James gawked at Steve, getting no further information from the pilot. "We're going after them, right?"

"No. They're gone. It's over." Steve leaned against the arm of his chair and rested his head on his hand, closing his eyes.

"The hell it is!" James argued and then he heard Steve let out a shaky sigh. "Hey," he said, lightly punching Cortez's shoulder. "We'll figure something out. We always do."

"Try telling Adam that."

"No. No. Shepard will _not _give up," he insisted, grabbing Cortez's wrist and forcing the pilot to look at him. "This is not his damn fault." He then released Steve's wrist, dismayed at the sadness in his friend's eyes.

"I know him," Steve said quietly, almost inaudibly. "He'll take all this on his shoulders. Those commandos gave their lives, on _his_ orders, for _nothing. _ One of the most important planets in the entire galaxy is gone, and the information contained in the beacon would have provided the key to the Catalyst – information Cerberus now has. This could cost us the war, James, and he'll blame himself for all of it."

"Then you need to set him straight! Go talk to him, man!"

"No… I can't. He's…" Steve turned slightly in his chair, facing James. "Have you ever watched someone you care about while they're sleeping?"

"What?"

"Have you? Just answer the question."

James paused, recalling doing just that when he and Abby had spent the night together. With a jolt, he'd realised how, for the first time in his life, he'd felt responsible, even frightened, for someone other than himself. "Yeah, yeah, I have. Why are you –"

"Well, they're… _there_, you know? But _not_ there. They're right next to you, but you can't reach 'em. _You _know they're safe, and if anything were to happen, you know you'd be there to protect them, because when they're like that, they're completely yours. But at the same time they're in a place where _you _don't exist, maybe where you never existed. Where you _can't_ protect them from whatever terrors they might be facing. It's one of the most beautiful and horrifying things a person can witness."

"Hey, come on," James mumbled, Steve's words hitting home.

"I can't reach him," Steve said softly. "When he's like this, he gets this look in his eyes… I saw it after Tuchanka. He won't let me in. He won't even hear me when I speak. You never see that side of him, James, but I do. I know how much he'll punish himself for every one of those wasted lives. I really think this might be…"

He closed his eyes for a second and sighed. "From this point onward, every single person killed by the Reapers will be on Adam's conscience," he went on, his voice hardening. "No, it's _not_ his fault, but he won't see it like that, and I sure as hell won't be able to persuade him otherwise. I'm supposed to be there for him and there's not a damn thing I can do to help him!" he said angrily, bringing his fist down on the console.

"Hey, man, listen!" James urged. "Don't lose sight that none of this is your fault, all right? None of this is your doing and the truth is, Shepard probably wouldn't have gotten this far if it wasn't for you keepin' him steady. He's… he's got a lot of people watching him, a lot of things beyond his control that people out there want to make him accountable for. Now, that's not right, and it sure as fuck isn't fair, but it is what it is and I think… no, I _know_, he'd have been lost without you."

Steve groaned, raising his head a little. "That's great, James, and I appreciate you saying that, but it doesn't do me any damned good right now, does it?"

"It does if you _remember_ why I'm telling you this," James argued softly. "Don't underestimate what you do for him. And don't let that Cerberus piss ant convince either of you that this is a lost cause. Don't give them any more power than what they've already taken. Find him, Steve, and help him get his head back on straight. Make him _hear_ you, man, help him remember who he is."

Steve shook his head, a half-hearted laugh escaping his lips. "And just who is he, then?"

"He's Commander fucking Shepard, the only thing the Reapers are afraid of. Cerberus can go fuck themselves and Shepard _will_ save the goddamn day. You can take that shit to the bank."

Steve felt a genuine smile tug at his lips and he nodded. "The galaxy according to James Vega, huh?"

"Damn right."

With a soft sigh, Steve thumbed towards the hatch. Both men stood, stepped out of the Kodiak, and walked with determination towards the elevator. "EDI, where's Shepard?" asked Cortez.

"He is in service shaft J25."

"Huh? Where's that?" asked Steve, and his omni-tool pinged. He keyed it, bringing up a 3D schematic of the Normandy's service tunnels.

"He is here," EDI supplied, a red dot appearing on the map.

"Is he okay?"

"Life signs are within normal parameters."

"Wait… I know where that is," Steve said, examining the schematic closely. "It's accessible via the old armory, off the CIC. Look, it goes down past the Crew Deck and terminates behind the engine core."

"That room's being used for storage, right?" James asked Cortez as they stopped outside the elevator.

"Yeah. Am I authorised to access that part of the ship, EDI?"

"You are authorised to enter the CIC storage room, Lieutenant. You are _not_ authorised to enter shaft J25 without the commanding officer or chief engineer's permission, as it constitutes part of the engine core, and access is therefore restricted."

"Well… would it be okay if I ask Shepard when I get there?"

"Under normal circumstances, no. However, I suspect that discretion is called for on this occasion. I will… 'look the other way' if you promise not to sabotage the ship's engines."

"I give you my word. You're the best, EDI," the pilot said with a glance at James.

"Get goin' Esteban, I'm going back to the med bay whether Chakwas likes me there or not. I'll see you later."

"Okay. And James? Thanks, man," Steve said sincerely as they stepped into the elevator.

~o~O~o~

Steve picked his way down his fourth ladder, feeling a gentle vibration through his feet and hands as he neared the engine core.

"Who's up there?" an angry voice demanded from below, and Steve froze on the ladder, his heart thudding.

"It's me," he replied softly, and a long, loud sigh was heard. "Requesting permission to join you in Engineering, Commander."

Shepard gave no reply and Steve, deciding to take a risk, continued to descend until he reached the bottom. Shepard was sitting on the floor of a small junction, his knees brought up to his chest, his elbows resting on them. He didn't look up as Steve slowly approached, and neither man spoke at first.

After a minute, Steve crouched next to him. "Whatcha doing?"

"Pouting. Wanna join me?" Shepard replied in a flat tone.

"Sure." Steve sat on the cold metal floor next to Shepard, mirroring his posture. He listened carefully, trying to discern Adam's breathing pattern over the soft thrum of the engines, and it was a pattern he recognised: the same restrained one Shepard used when he'd awoken from a nightmare and was trying not to disturb Steve, unaware he was already awake.

Steve knew no matter what he said, no matter how much support and comfort he offered, that at this moment Adam was the loneliest man in the galaxy. But he had to try, even though he already knew the outcome. "Do you want to –?"

"No," Shepard replied abruptly and then took a deep breath. "No," he repeated in a softer tone. "Not right now." He turned his head a little towards Steve but didn't look at him. "How'd you get down here? You don't have clearance to be in Engineering."

Steve shrugged. "I negotiated with EDI."

"Right." Shepard's head fell back and his posture slackened slightly. "How's Liara?" he asked listlessly.

"Ah, she's… I'm sure she's okay. I mean, after all, she's got people looking out for her, right?"

"Yeah. I'll bet," said Shepard, and Steve was dismayed to hear a touch of bitterness in Adam's voice. He listened again, detecting a change in Shepard's breathing pattern and he waited, knowing he wouldn't need to prompt his partner to elaborate – something was coming, and Steve would allow Shepard to say it in his own time.

"Well, Thessia's gone, and I have to tell the asari councillor that. I also have to tell Hackett that I lost the Catalyst."

"Cerberus _stole_ the Catalyst," Steve reminded him, but Shepard scoffed, shaking his head.

"When I fuck up, Steve, I fuck up big, don't I? _I_ ordered those commandos to their deaths, and for what? So Cerberus could hand us over to the Reapers, that's what. How many lives have I thrown away now that I've handed Cerberus the key to our victory? How many deaths mean nothing, how many sacrifices will go unnoticed because of me?" he hissed, jabbing his chest with his thumb.

Cortez reached for one of Shepard's hands, but the commander moved his aside. "Adam…"

"So who dropped the ball with Earth?" Shepard asked angrily. "Did _you_ get a name? 'Cause I sure as hell didn't. No, you know why no one knows who was responsible for the Reapers' invasion of Earth? Because no gives a crap, _that's _why. Oh, they'll give a crap about Thessia, but where was all the wailing and chest-beating when Earth was occupied? Where, Steve?"

Shepard pushed himself to his feet and turned his back on Cortez, tightly gripping the ladder, his shoulders rising and falling. The pilot very slowly stood up but kept his distance, feeling helpless and heartbroken at seeing his man brought so low. He then took a deep breath, slow, burning anger coiling tightly in his stomach.

"I'm going to say one thing, Adam, and then I'll shut up," Cortez began, steel in his voice, "because I know no matter what I say, you'll crucify yourself over this, and it's not right. _ If_ the asari hadn't taken so long over this, _if_ they hadn't kept the beacon hidden, then things wouldn't have gotten this bad. I know that doesn't help, but the truth is, the asari government is responsible for Thessia's loss, not you. _They_ failed and you risked your life trying to fix _their_ mistake."

"Not that any of that matters now," Shepard mumbled, his voice quiet and uncertain.

Cortez took a few tentative steps closer to Shepard. "I need you to be strong, Adam. This isn't over yet. I need you to fight! If _you_ give up we may as well surrender to the Reapers right now!"

Shepard bent slightly at the waist and hung his head, his hands still on the rung of the ladder. "I don't know. I… look, you should go. I need to work this out in my head before I talk to anyone. I don't want you to see me like this."

Shepard heard quiet footsteps and straightened up as he felt Steve's presence behind him. "Too late," murmured the pilot, gently laying a hand on the commander's shoulder, flexing his fingers as he felt Shepard tense and then relax at his touch. Steve stepped closer, his chest touching Shepard's back, and he leaned against him, his forehead resting against the back of Adam's head. "These are the bad times," he whispered, "but they pass, and you're not alone. You'll never be alone."

"I… I know." Shepard shook his head, taking a few long breaths. "You should go, Steve," he said quietly. "I have to go up there and tell the 'important people' what I've done. I can't… I can't be _me _right now, can you understand that?"

"But you _are_ being 'you'. Thank you for not shutting me out," Steve said, clutching Shepard's shoulders and turning the commander around to face him. Shepard sighed and looked at Steve's chest. "Remember the conversation we had on the Citadel that one time?" Steve asked. "You said, 'No one is giving up. Not me, not you'. I listened to you then. Now listen to _me_. I'll die before I see you give up, Adam Shepard, and that's because I'll never give up on you. Can you understand _that_?"

A deep frown appeared on Shepard's brow, and he nodded but didn't look up. "I understand."

Steve squeezed Adam's shoulders. "We need you. We can't do this without you. There are people who care about you. People who love you. People who worry themselves sick over you."

"I know."

"And right now,_ I_ need you. Abby needs you."

"Abby? What does she have to do with anything?"

"You're one of those 'important people' to her, Adam, and she needs you," he reiterated, and Shepard slowly started to look up. "She's in trouble."

"What kind of trouble?" asked Shepard, finally looking into Steve's eyes.

~o~O~o~

Liara left the med bay the moment she'd known the cipher had given Abby the aid she'd so desperately needed. Visibly upset throughout the process, she'd spoken little to her crewmates, eager to seek the solace of her office.

No one had followed her out.

Chakwas had declared Liara's efforts to give Abby the cipher a resounding success, pleased to see that Abby's vitals had stabilized as well as the subsequent end to the erratic electrical activity within her brain. She would, the faithful healer promised, recover completely, once Abby had rested properly, of course.

James was now speaking softly to Abby who, while not yet entirely coherent, was at least awake and responding to familiar faces and simple directions. She clung to James's hand, holding him close to her, his presence clearly needed, but Shepard noted that the bulky soldier hadn't made any effort to leave her side anyway.

In fact, he seemed to be holding onto Abby as tightly as she was him.

With a quiet sigh, Shepard felt a small glimmer of hope bubble inside of him at the sight. He hadn't known many victories lately but maybe, just maybe, he could count James and Abby's obvious love for one another as one of them.

"I'll leave you to it," Shepard said quietly to Chakwas, not wanting to disturb the lovers, and headed for the door. He stepped out of sick bay, spotting Steve rising from a chair at a nearby table in the Mess.

"Is she okay?" Cortez asked as he moved to Shepard's side.

He nodded. "She will be."

"And you?"

"I'm…" He looked into the shuttle pilot's eyes and held them for a moment before nodding towards the main corridor. Steve followed him and together they waited for the elevator in silence.

When it arrived, they stepped inside and the doors closed. "CIC," Shepard said, and a quiet whirr was heard as the elevator began to ascend. "Wait. Halt."

Both men felt their equilibrium shift as the elevator stopped, and Shepard turned to Cortez, just watching him for a minute, his expression placid, but there was something in his eyes Steve couldn't quite fathom.

"Adam?"

Shepard didn't speak but continued to watch Cortez, his breathing slowing. Steve waited, and although he didn't feel threatened, he wondered what Adam was going to do. And then Shepard stepped closer to him, backing Steve against a wall, and kissed him slowly and deeply, causing Steve to let out an involuntary moan.

They remained locked in a tight embrace for several long minutes, their hands tenderly roaming each other's faces, arms and backs, both in a place where only _they _existed, and where the Reapers, the war and the egregiousness of it all could never intrude. Eventually Shepard broke the kiss but remained close, resting his forehead against Steve's.

"You made me believe," he rasped, his thumbs stroking the pilot's face. "I almost gave up. I came so close. Three years, Steve, I've been at this, and I just… I was done. I lost hope, just for a little while. But you made me believe again, and belief is greater than anything the Reapers, or Cerberus, can ever throw at us. I owe you everything. You _are _everything."

Steve hung his head slightly and let out a soft huff, momentarily unable to speak.

"I've gotta go talk to those important people now," Shepard whispered, and Steve nodded.

"You can do this," he encouraged.

Shepard took a step back and once again held Cortez's gaze. "I believe you. Thank you." He released Steve and straightened up. "Resume," he said, and the elevator once again began its climb.

They reached the CIC and the elevator door opened. "I'll come find you later," Shepard said to Steve, his fingers brushing against the pilot's hand. He then stepped out, picking up his pace as he turned right.

"Traynor, I want all senior staff in the War Room in fifteen minutes," he ordered as he walked. "You too. We're going after those bastards. This galaxy isn't big enough for them_."_

"Yes, sir!" she answered firmly, her fingers working her console. Behind her, a proud smile appeared on Cortez's face as the elevator door closed.


	18. The Final Companion

**The Final Companion **

**The Normandy, Iera System**

It was just after crew changeover and dinner in the Mess, and very few people were around, except for those who actually worked in there or were passing through on the way to their own work areas. Cortez was the only person actually seated; he'd tucked himself away in a corner, his back to the other tables, and was nursing a coffee while reading a data pad.

"Hey, you avoiding me or somethin'?" James asked from behind, and Steve half-turned before shaking his head and once again facing the table.

James pulled out a chair and sat next to his friend, glancing at the data pad in Steve's hands. "Whatcha reading? Anything fun?"

Steve sighed and pushed the pad away from himself. "No... I can't get into it anyway."

"Not enough pictures, huh?"

"Something like that."

"You talked to Shepard yet?"

Steve did a double-take at James, surprised by the question.

"Come on, Esteban, Shepard's been driving himself into the ground since we left Thessia. I know I haven't seen him visit the hangar, and since that's where you've been spending most of your time..."

"He... he didn't come to his cabin last night," Steve said quietly, not looking up.

"He didn't come to bed?"

Steve nodded. "EDI told me he was in the War Room, and had fallen asleep at one of the terminals. She offered to wake him, but I told her no. I haven't seen him since dinner yesterday, and he spent most of that working at the table."

James rolled his shoulders and watched Steve for a moment. "He's under a lot of pressure."

"Yeah. Too much."

"But hey," James began, forcing enthusiasm into his voice, "we saved his friend, Miranda, and now we get to whup Kai Leng's indoctrinated ass, right? I'd sure like to meet that SOB in person," he growled, cracking his knuckles. "We're just waitin' on the Alliance now for the final go-ahead to assault Cerberus HQ."

"How's Abby?" Steve asked, sounding weary.

"She's doing great. Well... between us, I think so." Cortez looked at James, who shrugged. "She _seems _to be doing great. I've been, you know, keeping her company. At night, I mean. She hasn't had any more nightmares, but a couple times I've caught her seeming kinda distant. Soon as I ask her about it, she fixes that smile... hell, maybe I'm reading too much into it. We're all tired."

"That we are," Steve agreed.

"Want some more coffee?" James offered, and Cortez shook his head.

"There's some left if you want any."

"I'm good."

The two friends sat back in their chairs and shared a few minutes of contemplative silence. Suspecting Cortez wasn't going to be the one to break it, James tried to think of something to say and then his eyes lit up as an idea took shape.

"You know what we need, Esteban?"

"_Besides_ someone hitting the kill switch on the Reapers and six months' leave on a secluded paradise?"

James snorted. "Yeah. _Obviously. _No, I mean a poker game! How long's it been since we all sat down together and just shot the shit? And Abby's one mean poker player. She'd get a real kick out of it. You in?"

"If _you_ taught her to play, then yeah, I'm in. Guess I won't be needing to bring too big a purse."

"Funny," James said sarcastically. "Oh, hey!" he called, spying Garrus strolling down the steps leading from the Main Battery. "Poker, twenty-one hundred hours, Starboard Lounge. Interested?"

"You playing, Vega?" smirked the turian. "Sure. I could use a laugh."

Hearing a quiet chuckle from Cortez, James huffed. "Yeah, you'll be wearing that smile on the other side of your face, Scars," he threatened. "Oh, wait, you _can't_, 'cause the other side of your face don't work right."

"Trash talking?" Garrus drawled as he headed out of the Mess. "Sure sign of nerves. Cortez, save a seat for me. Vega's bad luck rubs off on me when I sit next to him."

Before James could formulate a response, Garrus was gone. Needing his ego massaged, James cued up his omni-tool and called Abby. "Hey, Chula? I'm getting a poker game together in the Starboard Lounge. You up for it? There's a lot of people could do with cocky smiles wiping off of their faces, and my money's on you, honey."

She giggled. "I'm sure I don't know what you mean, James. I'm new to games of chance, as you know."

"Riiight. Whatever you say," he laughed. "Meet me there in about an hour? You can help me set up if you want."

"I'd love to. See you then."

"You got it, Chula. And remind me _not _to play against you."

"I make no promises. Cousland out!"

James deactivated his device and glanced at Cortez, who was smiling at him. "I'm glad you found Abby, James," he said with sincerity. "You seem really happy together."

"Thanks, man," James replied with a grin. "So, you gonna ask Shepard? I figure he could use a break."

Steve's face fell ever-so-slightly, and he quickly nodded. "EDI, where's... never mind." He activated his omni-tool and waited a minute until Shepard answered.

"Steve? Everything okay?"

"Yeah, just wanted to let you know that James is getting a game together in the Starboard Lounge. Wanna come with me?"

Shepard smoothed his hair down with his hand and sighed. "I'll try. Go on without me if I'm running late."

James noticed Steve's nostrils flare and the pilot stood up. "Excuse me a sec," he said to James before leaving the table and stopping a short distance away. "Where are you?" he asked Shepard.

"CIC. Why?"

Steve's jaw clenched as he realised he couldn't have a completely private discussion with Shepard. "I really hope you'll find the time to make it," he said as evenly as he could, noticing Shepard's eyes narrow slightly.

"What time?" asked the commander, realising Steve wasn't making a request.

"Twenty-one hundred hours."

Shepard nodded once, his eyes on something to his side. "I'll be there."

"Are you all right?" Cortez whispered.

"I can't do that right now, Lieutenant," he replied briskly, and Steve noticed that Shepard was standing close to Traynor. "I'll meet you at twenty-one hundred hours."

"Okay," Steve said slowly. "Hope to see you there. Cortez out."

James noticed the light of Steve's omni-tool fade, and leaned back in his chair. "He coming?" he asked, pretending he hadn't heard their conversation.

"I think so," Cortez mumbled. "I'm... heading up to the cabin to change. I'll see you later, okay?"

"Sure thing," James replied, watching his friend leave without giving a backward glance. He waited until he was certain Steve had gone before activating his omni-tool again. "Chula, it's me again."

"You just couldn't wait, could you?" she teased.

He gave a half-hearted laugh. "Damn straight. Hey, you doing anything right now?"

"James? You sound so serious all of a sudden. What is it?"

"Oh, nothin', just got a little something on my mind. You got a minute? Or thirty?"

"Of course, I'm in my quarters."

"Okay. Be right there."

~o~O~o~

After a few more invitations had been sent out, the places at the poker table were mostly filled. Shepard had told Traynor to take a break and sent her along with a very specific message for Cortez, stating that he might be a little late but he _would _be there. Therefore, as the first game began, a seat was left vacant next to Cortez, with Garrus in the seat to his opposite side.

James appointed himself dealer, and smiled to himself as he dealt the cards, happy to see his friends gathered together. Traynor was to his left, followed by Garrus and Cortez. Then there was the empty seat reserved for Shepard at the opposite end and Kaidan, Joker and Abby were to his right.

Tali and Liara had politely declined James's invitation, citing a heavy workload. Tali had suddenly found herself in demand in Engineering, and Liara had rarely been seen outside her office since returning from Thessia, although she'd had plenty of visitors, who'd just happened to be 'passing by'. The asari scientist had briefly visited with Abby during that time, although the details of their conversation were not known to James, and he hadn't asked.

James wasn't stupid. He could see that Liara and Shepard hadn't been the same since returning from Thessia. After Traynor had pinpointed the route Kai Leng's shuttle had taken, James had accompanied Shepard to Sanctuary and, during their confrontations with Cerberus troops, he'd seen his commander fight with a fervour and brutality he'd not witnessed before. He'd always respected and rated Shepard as a combatant, but he'd seen something in Shepard's eyes as he'd ended each hostile's life that, for just a second, had frightened him.

But now, back on the Normandy and enduring an agonising wait as the Alliance diverted ships to Cronos Station, where the Illusive Man was believed to be holed up, Shepard's passion and zeal were conspicuously absent – he was there but _not _there, as Steve had so eloquently put it.

James had relayed his concerns about Shepard and Cortez – the two most important men in his life, his brothers – to Abby, who had not seemed surprised in the least. Of course, she'd been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. They were coming to the end, and whether they were left standing at that end was uncertain. Abby knew what it was like to stare into the abyss, to have the weight of so many people – people she cared about – on her shoulders.

She hadn't said so, but James knew that she had plenty of advice for his CO, and would impart it, if it was welcomed, before they met their end. For his part, James had privately resolved to keep Steve's head above water by any means possible.

And then there was Abby to think about. Since receiving the cipher, her nightmares had ceased, and she appeared settled, centred, at peace – but she was holding something back, of that, James was certain. Whether that something was meant for Shepard, or was related to their mission, James didn't know. After all, Abby and Shepard had shared something very personal by interacting with a prothean beacon, and neither had talked openly about their experiences during this campaign. If Liara knew what they'd seen, she wasn't saying anything, either. James had decided against pushing Abby for an answer, opting instead to simply observe.

One of the advantages of being a brash, rough-around-the-edges jarhead was that no one would have him pegged as a people-watcher, but he was a consummate one and, considering he didn't know many hard facts, he'd picked up on a hell of a lot.

He'd joined Abby in praying last night, something he hadn't done in a long while.

"You going to stare at that deck all night, Vega, or are we going to play some poker?" Kaidan teased good-naturedly.

"Yeah, the cards won't be any kinder to you just because you make eyes at 'em," Joker joined in.

"I've got Lady Luck at my side tonight," he replied with a glance at Abby and Traynor, "two of 'em, in fact, and tonight, me and Esteban are gonna represent. Isn't that right, my friend?"

Steve shrugged, a reluctant smile pulling at his lips. "Not sure exactly what we're going to represent, but sure, I'll give it a shot."

Garrus chuckled to himself. "Meaning if Cortez wins, Vega's losses are negated because you're 'representing' him?"

"Sounds about right to me," Steve replied wryly.

"You guys need to have a little faith," Vega complained, chugging down some beer. "Traynor, you wanna start?"

"Am I too late to be dealt in?" Shepard asked from the door to the lounge, and a light came to Steve's eyes as James indicated the empty chair with his hand.

"Just about squeezed in, Loco. Have a seat."

"Thanks." Shepard edged past Kaidan and Joker before sitting down next to Steve and briefly looking at the pilot. James observed one of Steve's hands move below table level, and a moment later, Shepard's hand also moved down. James noticed that the other occupants of the table had either not seen – or were ignoring – the fact that Shepard appeared to struggle with his emotions for a second when Steve had squeezed his hand. A quick glance at Abby confirmed that she had also witnessed this. Both men's hands were then returned to the table top, and James dealt Shepard his cards.

"I'm in," Traynor declared, throwing ten into the pot.

"I'll see you," said Garrus, and Cortez did likewise.

Shepard took a deep breath and roughly cleared his throat. "Here's your ten," he said, throwing two chips in, "and ten more."

"Oh, ho, a confident showing from the boss," James teased, laughing at the deep frown on Kaidan's brow.

"I'll see you," the major groaned miserably, apparently unhappy with his cards.

"Twenty," Joker said, "plus fifty." He added his chips to the pot and looked at Shepard, both men staring, unblinking, at each other.

"Oh dear," Abby mumbled. "Does that mean I need to add seventy?" she asked James, who bit back a smile.

"Yeah, if you wanna stay in the game."

She sighed and counted out her chips before adding them to the pot and shaking her head.

"Don't forget to _represent_, Mr. Vega," Steve reminded him, and James scowled before seeing Abby's bet. He then removed the top card from the pile and dealt out three further cards – the 'flop' - which all players could see.

Traynor examined her cards for a few moments before scooping up a small pile of chips. "I'll see you, James, and raise fifty."

"Damn it," Garrus muttered, throwing his cards to the table. "Fold."

"I'm in," Cortez added, seeing Traynor's bet.

"Whatcha got?" Joker taunted the commander.

Not taking his eyes off the pilot, Shepard threw in one hundred and twenty, followed by another hundred, and James let out a long whistle.

"Seriously, Shepard?" Kaidan moaned. "Could you _not_ use me as a buffer for your and Joker's rivalry?" Grumbling under his breath, the major counted out his chips and saw the bet, before throwing in a cheeky thirty. "How 'bout a nice even two-fifty?" he said to Joker, who tutted.

"Would I get a CAT-6 if I call a superior officer an ass?" he asked no one in particular.

"Why not try?" Kaidan invited with a grin. "Might just be worth it."

"Kaidan, you're a certified ass... ault on my eyes, you handsome devil," Joker said, raising a few laughs.

"Never knew you felt that way, _Jeff,_" Kaidan joked huskily, waggling his eyebrows at the pilot, who nearly fell off his chair as he scooted away.

"Guys, guys," James began, "what you do in your own time's up to you. We got a couple of ladies present here. Keep a lid on it, huh?"

"Always suspected," Garrus piped up. "Remember the days before EDI, Shepard? Must have been lonely in that cockpit. Funny, I remember Kaidan being there a lot."

"Major Alenko is still a frequent visitor to the cockpit," EDI added over the comm., "but Garrus is almost a permanent fixture there."

"Ha! How d'you like _them_ apples, Vakarian?" Joker retorted.

"No need to fight over me," quipped Kaidan, holding his hands up. "There's enough Alenko for everyone."

"Joker," interrupted Shepard, "I notice you haven't made a bet. Quit flirting and put your money where your mouth is."

"Crap," muttered the pilot, tossing his cards down. "I'm out."

Abby raised a finger to her mouth and glanced expectantly at James. "Does this mean I don't have to bet? I remember you mentioning something like that."

"That's right," James agreed, leaning closer to her and lowering his voice. "Funny, _I _don't remember mentioning that. Damn hustler," he teased before sitting back and winking at her.

"Lucky I asked," she said, ignoring Cortez's knowing smile. "I believe I will... check?"

"I believe I will, too," said James, affecting a posh voice, and his action was followed by Traynor and Cortez.

"Just so you're familiar with the rules, Abby," Shepard began pointedly, "if I make a bet now, you need to see the bet or raise. If I _don't_ make a bet, you don't have to, either."

"Oh, yes, James also mentioned that," she replied innocently, knowing he was on to her. "Thank you."

"Good, just wanted to make sure," Shepard replied, counting out some chips. "Two-fifty... and two-fifty more."

"_Totally_ bluffing," Kaidan mumbled, "but I fold."

"I agree, he is bluffing," Abby said, adding her chips to the pot. "Here's five hundred. Show me your hand."

"Gladly." Shepard turned his cards upwards and placed them flat on the table. "Three of a Kind."

"Ah, damn it," Joker groused, crossing his arms.

Abby's face fell. "Oh. Well, I fear I can't match that. All I have are these..." She placed her cards down next to the flop, arranging them in numerical order, and Shepard's expression soured as the last card was laid out.

"You've gotta be kidding me."

"Straight!" Joker announced in triumph. "Buuuuuurrrrrn!"

"Wahoo!" James screeched, jumping to his feet and punching the air. "Lady Luck for the win! Aw, yeah!"

"Hey, I had Two Pair," Kaidan protested, showing his cards. "I think that should at least be acknowledged."

Shepard half-smiled and tapped the table. "Well played, Abby... for a 'beginner'."

"Yes, congratulations," said Traynor, reaching across the table to shake Abby's hand. She then sat back and touched her ear, holding a hand up to everyone else, who fell silent. "Commander... Admiral Hackett on the QEC for you. Priority one."

Shepard shot to his feet, quickly followed by Kaidan, Steve, Traynor and Joker. "Let's go," he said to Traynor, effectively dismissing the rest of his crew. "EDI, General Quarters. I want this ship loaded for bear."

"Acknowledged," replied the AI, and everyone's omni-tools pinged as the order was sent.

"Abby, I need to ask you to return to your quarters," Shepard said as they filed out of the lounge and headed for the elevator.

"Can I do something to help?" she asked, not wanting to impose but feeling she had to offer.

"I wouldn't mind some company," Garrus said, and Shepard nodded his agreement as he, Steve, Traynor, James and Joker entered the elevator.

"Good idea. CIC. Shuttle Bay," he said, his expression grim as the doors slid closed.

~o~O~o~

**Two hours later**

"Joker, ETA on Cronos Station?" Shepard asked from his cabin, where he was seated on the edge of his bed.

"Thirty-five minutes, Commander, five less than when you asked me five minutes ago."

Adam sighed. "Yeah, okay. Thanks."

"You doin' okay, Shepard?"

There was genuine concern in Joker's voice, and Shepard paused before answering. "I just want this done, Joker. We all do."

"Yeah. You know we're all with you, right? Always have been."

Shepard felt something rise inside him and he fought to keep his voice steady. "I know. Appreciate it." He cut the comm. link, not trusting himself to speak further.

He'd played with the idea of asking Steve to join him for a while, but Joker's simple and heartfelt words had exposed just how fragile Shepard was feeling, and he needed to regain his focus. In little under an hour, he and his team would be assaulting the Illusive Man's base, where they _had _to find the Catalyst data. If they didn't...

He rose and headed for the bathroom, where he splashed his face with water and did some breathing exercises Dr. Chakwas had once taught him for dealing with stressful situations. He'd shrugged them off at the time but right now, he'd try anything. He _had _to get that data – the entire galaxy was counting on him.

He cued up his omni-tool. "EDI, James, Kaidan, Garrus. Shuttle Bay in thirty minutes."

His most trusted people.

He couldn't risk Liara because she was fighting her own personal battle. Wasn't that what he was doing, though? Could he trust himself? If someone else was commanding the Normandy, would they trust Shepard, deem him fit for combat?

"Not if they were doing their job, no," he was forced to conclude, but who else was there? He rested his hands on the washbasin and stared at his reflection, giving himself an internal talking-to.

His door chimed, and he sighed, hanging his head. Then, his heart picked up its pace as he wondered if it was Steve. In one way, he hoped it wasn't. Just seeing Steve would remind him that he was mortal, fallible, that he possessed feelings and emotions and those, he couldn't allow to get in his way. Not now.

But a small part of him, the part he kept tucked away in the deepest recesses of his heart, ached for it to be Steve at the door. _Needed _for it to be him.

He blotted his face with a towel and called for his visitor to enter. He exited the bathroom, surprised to come face-to-face with Abby.

"Abby? What can I do for you?"

"Actually, I came to ask you the same thing."

"I... don't follow," he mumbled.

She moved further into the cabin, venturing a glance at Alistair's shield before she sat on one of the couches. She then looked at Shepard, saying nothing, until he joined her and took a seat on the couch opposite.

"Talk to me," she encouraged.

"About what?"

"Everything."

He frowned and watched her for a minute, not sure what to say. "Abby, I appreciate the-"

"I know you can't talk to your crew mates because you don't want to destroy their spirit," she interrupted, sitting forward and clasping her hands together. "You need them to see you as confident, fearless... invincible. But you're not, you're just a man, and they know that. But they haven't seen what you and I have seen, lived what we've lived. I _know _how you're feeling, Adam. I know how lonely it is, how terrifying. I know what it is to feel the walls closing in around you, to know every action you take ripples outwards, reaching and affecting many others, maybe even harming those you care for. This is not a burden one person should bear alone. I'm here. Use me in whatever way you can."

Her words had a startling effect on him and he covered his mouth and nose with his hands, the lines on his brow deepening with every unsteady breath he took.

"Talk to me," she said gently, rising and sitting next to him, but taking care not to touch him. "I am family, after all. I still don't know why I'm here, but maybe _this _is why, who knows? Share your burden with me, please. A wise man once said, 'A person whose head is bowed and whose eyes are heavy cannot look at the light'."

"And who was that?" he rasped.

"My father."

He uncovered his face and looked at her, seeing a knowledge and wisdom in her eyes he hadn't noticed, or appreciated, before.

"'No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another'," he quoted softly. "Charles Dickens. I read a lot of his stuff when I was a kid. I, uh... my mom would read to me at bedtime."

"What a wonderful memory. Your mother must be... must have been... a joy to you."

"Yes, ma'am," he whispered.

They shared a brief silence before Abby touched Shepard's back, once again gaining his attention.

"You don't think you can do this," she began, "but I _know _you can."

He inhaled and shook his head. "It's not that... Abby, let me ask you a question. Since you got the cipher, have you been having recurring dreams? Not nightmares, not about machines or fire or death. Just something mundane that you can't quite make sense of?"

"As a matter of fact, yes, I have," she answered in surprise, and Adam turned towards her.

"What did you dream about?"

She shook her head. "It's not exactly mundane, but it's something that really happened, only… it's different, and I don't understand the change."

"How is it different?"

"Well, during the Blight, we encountered the guardian of a temple which housed a holy relic. While I was there, I… I don't know if I dreamed it or if it was real, but I saw my father. He told me several things, most of all how proud he was of me." She paused, struggling with her composure. "Then we said goodbye for the final time." Shepard laid a hand on her arm, but she drew a deep breath and continued. "Recently, I've dreamed of that conversation several times, but each time, my father says something different. He says, 'Fight against what your heart wants. Embrace that which is ugly and monstrous. Choose pain. Choose death and sorrow and loss. It is your only salvation'."

"Does that mean anything to you?" Shepard asked, frowning.

"No," she said quietly. "It's almost as if my father isn't speaking at all, like the words are someone else's, but it _is _his voice. He did not say that to me when we originally entered the temple. In my dream, when he says it, he's so insistent, so passionate, like it's something that absolutely _must _be done. But that's not the only thing… when he says it, he seems to be looking over my shoulder, as though he's saying it to someone else. I can't think what it could mean."

Shepard nodded thoughtfully but said nothing.

"And what about you, Adam? I take it from your question that you're also experiencing a recurring dream?"

"I am, but it's a lot more straightforward than yours."

"Tell me, please."

He sighed and looked down at his hands, raising them slightly. "I've been having the same dream for the past three years, but only recently have I got its meaning. I dreamed... there's a pair of hands, and they're holding a long, thin object. Since I was reinstated on the Normandy, the object's become more distinct each time I dream about it. It's a placard to be placed on the memorial wall on the Crew Deck. The hands are Steve's."

"I don't understand," she said, confused. "You can only see the hands? How do you know they belong to Steve?"

"The skin tone's right, and the dream's so clear now, I can see his fingernails, every blemish and imperfection on his skin. His hands are very distinctive, quite elegant for a man. And he would be the one to set the placard on the wall."

"Is there a name on the placard?" she asked, fear entering her voice.

He nodded. "It finally came to me the night we returned from Thessia. It says... 'Commander Shepard'."

They fell silent again, and it was several minutes before Abby spoke. "You believe you're going to die."

"I've always believed that's a possibility, whatever situation we're going into. You _have _to have that fear – without it you get cocky and make mistakes." He glanced at her, seeing that she was nodding. "This time, though... there's a certainty about it, an acceptance. It's like a companion, always with me. I feel it around every corner, just out of sight, waiting."

"Adam..."

"It's okay," he said thickly, patting her hand. "If it's going to happen, there's nothing I can do about it. If I fail in getting the data, defeating the Reapers, whatever, this crew _will_ succeed. It's Steve I worry about the most. I don't know if you're aware, but he already lost a husband."

She quietly gasped, bringing a hand to her mouth. "I didn't know that. Dear Maker."

"So you can understand why..."

"Yes, yes, I can. I'm so sorry."

"I can barely look at him," Shepard mumbled, "knowing what I'm going to do to him. To all of them. They're my _family, _Abby."

"You don't know anything for certain," she said firmly.

"But I do. I feel it, deep down inside. It's driving me hard to finish this thing, but I know I won't be there at the end." He looked into her eyes. "I'm sorry, Abby, I needed to share this with someone. I'm sorry it had to be you."

"That's what I'm here for," she said, wrapping her arm around his back, "but I don't believe our futures are set in stone. You'll find a way back to Steve, to all of them. You love them too much to leave them."

His shoulders sagged, and she squeezed him before releasing him and standing up. "From what EDI told me, we have about half an hour before we reach our destination. Whatever you believe, you should spend every minute you can with him. He's awfully worried about you."

"I know," he sighed.

She reached down and touched his cheek, raising his head slightly until their eyes met. "I will remember your dream, Adam, and I will repeat it to you when this is over, and you _will _be there to hear it. Promise me you'll remember mine. Maybe it means something? After all, it started immediately after I'd interacted with the beacon. It could be a message of some kind."

"Embrace that which is ugly and monstrous," he repeated. "Choose pain, choose death and sorrow and loss."

"Now spend some time with Steve," she advised.

"I will. Thanks, Aunty Abby," he said in a weak attempt at humour.

She clasped both sides of his face and kissed his brow before straightening up. "The Maker always walks at your side, even if you do not hear his footfalls."

He nodded and bowed his head, finding she was gone when he looked up.

After a few minutes of reflection, he activated his omni-tool.

"She's prepped and ready, Commander," Steve said without preamble. "Standing by for your orders."

"That doesn't surprise me," Shepard said softly. "Steve, would you like to join me in the Starboard Lounge? We have an escort and we'll be rendezvousing with the rest of Fifth Fleet shortly. I thought maybe we could watch them go by together. I heard you like that kind of thing."

"I do," Steve replied, not caring who heard him, "just as long as we're together."

"Always," he murmured softly.

"Race ya."

To his own surprise, Shepard laughed. "You're on." He cut the comm. link and leapt to his feet, frail hope blooming in his belly.


	19. Incursion

**Incursion**

**Anadius, Horsehead Nebula**

Shepard was seated in the co-pilot's chair aboard the Kodiak, Steve to his left, with EDI, Garrus, Kaidan and James in the rear. The external bay doors were open but the team had not yet departed the Normandy, and they listened to the comm. chatter between Joker and Fifth Fleet as they waited for an opening through Cerberus's 'welcoming committee'.

"We're as close as I can get us," Joker announced. "Looks like our guys are punching a hole through their defences. Standby."

Steve glanced at Shepard, who indicated Cortez should respond. "Copy that, Joker. Standing by."

A few minutes passed before Joker spoke again. "Looking good, Cortez. Cerberus is regrouping here," he said, the co-ordinates immediately appearing on one of Steve's screens. "That's your best shot, right there."

"Got it," Steve replied, his hands working the screens.

"Hey, guys?" Joker added. "Take care of her?"

"I can take care of myself, Jeff," answered EDI.

"Fifth Fleet, this is Normandy Incursion Team," said Steve over the QEC. "Ready to depart on your go. We'd appreciate it if you'd take some of the heat off us."

"This is Captain Dawn Jenkins of Arcturus Bluetails. Roger that, Incursion Team. Ready to provide support. You are clear to proceed."

"Understood, Captain," Cortez replied. "Departure in T-minus twelve seconds."

"That's Corporal Jenkins's sister," Shepard said with a backward glance at Kaidan.

"Huh," Kaidan mumbled, remembering their squad mate who'd fallen at Eden Prime three years ago. "Richard would've been proud today."

"Yes, he would. So would Ash. Maybe they'll send us a little luck."

"Clearing bay doors," Cortez announced as the Kodiak penetrated the barrier, heading straight for Cronos Station.

"With all due respect, Commander, we don't need luck," James said confidently. "We've got each other, _and_ we've got these bad boys," he added, stroking his heavily-modded shotgun. "Cerberus won't know what hit 'em."

Garrus smirked. "With an attitude like that, Vega, The Illusive Man might just piss his pants and run."

"Hell, I hope not," replied James in dismay. "That asshole's due some serious payback."

"Brace for evasive maneuvers!" Steve warned as the Kodiak pulled hard to starboard, and everyone in the back grabbed hold of the rail above their heads as they were jolted back and forth.

"Steve, bogey on our ten!" Shepard exclaimed. "Bluetails! Where's our support?"

"I see it," Steve replied, his voice icy calm, his concentration unbroken as he deftly evaded the hostile and returned fire.

"Bluetails here, with you now, Incursion Team," a voice broke in over the comm. as several small fighters surrounded the Kodiak. "Sorry we're late. Drawing their fire."

"No harm done, Bluetails," Steve said. "We appreciate the assist."

"Come and get us, you brainwashed fucks!" one of the pilots cried, and Steve chuckled as he and Shepard watched their escorts break formation, taking off in several different directions. Then, his laughter abruptly stopped when two of the fighter pilots' transponder signals vanished off his radar.

"Damn it!"

"Cover their left flank!" ordered Captain Jenkins over the comm. "Incursion Team, we have eyes on an open cargo hatch, aft. Transmitting navpoint now."

"Received," Shepard replied, assisting Steve as the shuttle pilot's attention was firmly on his radar. "New course laid in."

"Confirmed," Steve said, acknowledging the change. "Fifth Fleet, we're going in. Gonna have to make a low pass. Everyone hold on tight!"

"Give 'em hell for us," Captain Jenkins urged. "Wish we could join you."

"You're already with us, Captain," Shepard answered. "Just keep yourselves alive out there."

"You too, I.T. Good luck."

"Okay, coming in hot!" Steve exclaimed as the station rushed towards them. "All hands brace for impact!"

~o~O~o~

Abby stood next to the huge view screen in her quarters, as she always did when one of her new friends, especially James, had embarked upon a mission. She'd prayed before they'd set off, and breathed a sigh of relief and gratitude as she'd watched the Kodiak successfully reach the distant space station, although it had done so at considerable speed. The fact that several enemy vessels had subsequently gone after the Kodiak – and had quickly been chased off by the Alliance's Fifth Fleet – told her that Steve had landed safely, at least she hoped so.

Watching James head into danger was nerve-wracking but she had to admit it excited her a little, too. She'd gone down to the shuttle bay to wave him off and seeing him fully 'suited up', as he called it, his firearms in their holsters and a belt of grenades strapped around his waist, had made her stomach flutter just a little, but it wasn't James's accoutrements that did it – it was his confidence, his absolute self-belief.

His swagger.

James didn't have the same pressures on his shoulders as Shepard, and saw every combat situation for what it was, not considering the bigger picture like his CO had to. That would come later in James's life, when age, experience and rank taught him the many lessons that were still to come. For now, though, James saw Cerberus as ants to be crushed underfoot, and had departed with some stirring words and fire in his belly, while some of his companions, especially Shepard and Kaidan, had been in a more taciturn mood.

James's confidence, however, was not blind. He had good reason to believe in himself and his friends, and their many victories in the past fortified that confidence. James's swagger was well-founded and well-earned and it made Abby believe that not only would he be safe; it also made _her_ feel safe.

She'd seen another side to him, though, a side she was certain Adam or 'Esteban' weren't privy to. He was thoughtful and intelligent, though he tried very hard to play down that aspect of himself. He also had a spiritual side, one that was revealed in fleeting glimpses but was there nevertheless. He made her laugh and possessed an enthusiasm and passion for life that was infectious. What was more, he had a heart the size of a planet.

All of those things, wrapped in muscle and infused with testosterone, made a man Abby had found very hard to resist, and one she'd grown to love in a very short time.

Her feelings were strong and true, there was no denying that, but she was forced to wonder how long this happiness would last, and how James would be affected if it didn't.

Liara and Karin's investigations into Abby's presence in this universe had been put on hold while they devoted all of their time to aiding Shepard, and she had no arguments with that – she'd never intended to obstruct their mission. As Abby's technical knowledge was limited to basic use of her omni-tool, however, she had to conclude that she was no closer to an answer, and would remain so for the near future.

EDI had been very helpful, reminding Abby of the datapad she'd filled with information gleaned from the vaults beneath Denerim Palace, but so far Abby had been reluctant to read it. She suspected whatever she discovered would not be pleasant, and had made the excuse to herself that she was too busy keeping an eye on Adam and James to study it.

Now, though, with nothing to do but wait and worry, she felt ashamed that she was quailing over the contents of a datapad while James and the others were risking their lives for the sake of so many.

"EDI," she began, not giving herself time to change her mind, "I think I'm going to read the data pad you so very kindly made for me."

"I did not in fact construct the data pad, but merely uploaded information to it," EDI corrected, and Abby smiled.

"I walked into that one, didn't I?"

"Indeed you did. If you wish, I can provide detailed schematics on the construction of a data pad, as well as information on sourcing materials, should you desire to fashion one yourself. However, you would need a data pad to read the schematics, which would decrease their usefulness."

Abby moved away from the view screen and sat on her bed, the data pad to her side. "You're trying to make me laugh, aren't you?" she guessed.

"Yes. I observed that you have appeared restless since the departure of the Incursion Team."

"I hope your platform will be safe, EDI. I prayed for you, as well."

"Thank you. You should not worry unduly. If my platform is destroyed, I will continue to exist on the Normandy."

Abby picked up the data pad and examined it, but did not switch it on. "I know, but I've become accustomed to speaking with you in person, as it were."

"I understand. Many of the crew have echoed your sentiments. I have full confidence in my platform's capabilities, as well as those of my squad mates."

Abby nodded, her eyes still on the data pad.

"I regret that I cannot be with you 'in person', but I am still here," EDI said. "Would you like me to read the information you are looking for? I do not require the data pad, as the information is stored in my memory files."

"Yes, I'd like that, EDI. It's nice to hear your voice. Thank you."

"You are welcome. Please specify your inquiry."

"Uh… well, what I really want to know first is how Thedas was destroyed? Was there another Blight?"

"Should I read directly from the source, or would you prefer a conversational style where I can provide the information in a more personable format?"

"Conversation, definitely."

"Very well. The scholar who predominantly wrote of the fifth Blight and the Grey Wardens' actions during that time – Brother Ferdinand Genitivi – does not write of any further Blights, presumably because he expired before any occurred. I can find no written evidence that such an event took place, but that does not mean a sixth Blight did not occur, only that no records existed within the Denerim vault. Although there is no empirical evidence available, the fact the 'taint' remains on the planet, and the lack of life or a sufficient eco system, point to an environmental catastrophe of some kind. I am sorry I cannot provide more than supposition."

"That's all right, EDI."

"Additionally, the fact there were no human or animal remains would seem to lend credence to your hypothesis that a sixth Blight_ did_ occur. 'There are no remains because the darkspawn and their taint would have consumed everything', to quote you directly, Abby."

"Yes, I did say that. Well, at least Alistair and Fergus never witnessed it. That's something." Abby fell quiet, and it was a few minutes before EDI spoke again.

"I have numerous entries pertaining to Alistair Theirin, if you would like to hear them."

Abby brightened a little, and released some of her tension in a sigh. "Yes, I'd like that."

"I will begin with a summary written by Brother Ferdinand Genitivi. 'King Alistair's story is a true rags-to-riches one. The offspring of a lowly serving girl and one of Ferelden's most beloved kings, Alistair's heritage, as well as his upbringing, gave him the common touch, which endeared him to his subjects. Indeed, to his dying day, Alistair could often be found in one of Denerim's many taverns, taking a beverage with his bodyguards and whoever found themselves lucky enough to have patronised the establishment that particular night.

His popularity was not universal, though, and he frequently found himself at odds with the nobility, who opposed his plans for the mages and elven folk. Thanks to his famous stubbornness, he prevailed, and after years of wrangling, he brokered new laws that had far-reaching benefits for the previously overlooked denizens of Ferelden.

Once crowned, he no longer served as a Grey Warden but continued to enjoy good relations with the Order. In the year 9:61, at the age of 49, he entered the Deep Roads for his Calling, and was never seen again. His legacy is that of a Ferelden forever changed, and only history can judge whether that change was favourable or not. Among the magi and elves of Thedas, however, he remains a hero to this day'."

Abby sat quietly, absorbing what EDI had told her.

"Should I continue?" asked the AI.

"Yes please, EDI. Tell me everything you know about him."

~o~O~o~

**The CIC, later that day**

Shepard emerged from the War Room silent and sombre. He lingered around the Galaxy Map and his private terminal for a minute, taking a quick look at everything, perhaps a final look.

Traynor worked at her console but kept a discreet eye on him. The Normandy crew was accustomed to seeing Shepard fired up, to hearing him gruffly bark out orders, and that was fine. Even when things were going badly and their commander was angered, that was also fine. They knew it wasn't personal, and that Shepard drove himself so hard that on occasion he needed to vent some of the frustration and tension that had built up inside.

Even when he was shouting, that was fine, too, because there was something his crew could do about that – they could follow his orders and do their very best for him. It was when he was quiet, though, that the crew felt uneasy, because they didn't quite know what to do. Should they approach him and offer assistance, or just leave him be?

And what was going to happen next? Would he get angry or remain quiet, which would be even worse?

Kai Leng was dead and the Illusive Man's base destroyed. The crew knew that, but none except the Incursion Team knew what the next step was, and no one but Shepard knew what had been discussed in the War Room.

Thankfully Adam Shepard was not an indecisive man, and on this occasion he allowed himself only a short time to reflect before he headed for the cockpit.

As he entered, Joker and EDI turned in their chairs to face him. They seemed to know there was to be no banter, no exchanging of jokes, and waited patiently for his word.

"Set a course for Earth, Joker."

With a single nod, Joker turned back to his console and began entering instructions. "Earth, here we come. ETA seven hours, forty-nine minutes."

"Can't we get there any faster?"

Joker shrugged. "Well, we _could _if you want to totally blow off orders _and_ the fact we're supposed to hit Earth with the rest of the united fleet, and just take on the Reapers by ourselves. Your call."

"Point taken," Shepard replied dryly. "She's all yours, Joker."

"Aye, aye, Commander."

Shepard felt the familiar hum beneath his feet as the Normandy entered FTL, and he rested against Joker's chair, thinking about what he was going to say to his crew, aware that EDI had not turned back to her console and was watching him.

"Everything okay, EDI?" he asked.

"Yes. I have catalogued the numerous samples of Reaper tech we found on Cronos Station and sent the information to Alliance Command, as well as the evidence of Cerberus's experiments on the refugees and their subsequent transformation into husks. If the Illusive Man can be located, there is now ample evidence to convict him as a war criminal."

"He won't get that far," Shepard said quietly but with determination. "I've got orders to kill him on sight. Wish I'd done it after we destroyed the Collector base."

"You're doing it now, Commander, that's what counts," said Joker. "Kill him a second time from me, will ya? And make it hurt."

"I'll do my best." Shepard leaned in between Joker and EDI, resting his hand on the console. "Guess I'd better talk to the crew."

He cleared his throat and opened the comm. before straightening up. "This is Shepard. As you're all no doubt aware, we've taken out Cerberus's base of operations. While there, we acquired intel that will help in the fight against the Reapers. We're now en route to Earth, and will arrive there in just under eight hours.

We all have jobs to do, and I know you'll do them to the best of your abilities. You're the finest damned crew in the Fleet, and I'm proud to have served with each and every one of you.

Now, make _yourselves_ proud. We're going home. This is _our _territory. Let's show those Reaper bastards what happens when they outstay their welcome."

Hearing a loud _hooyah! _from the CIC, he paused, hearing a few more.

"And for those of you not from Earth," he continued, "we're proud to call you our allies, and grateful you're with us. This war has affected every race across the galaxy, and many planets, many homes, have been lost. Earth isn't lost _yet_. Earth is where this war _ends."_

A loud cheer went up in the CIC, and Shepard waited until it had died down. "All departments, readiness reports in one hour. Shepard out."

"Well, you convinced _them_," Joker said quietly, referring to the crew in the CIC.

"That's the idea," Shepard replied, turning to leave.

"Even if you're not convinced of it yourself?"

Shepard turned back, stared intently at Joker for a second, and once again went to leave before EDI spoke.

"Shepard, I would remind you that agreed to visit Dr. Chakwas."

"What for?" Joker asked, turning his chair around.

"Shepard experienced a severe headache while we were collating Reaper tech aboard Cronos Station," EDI provided. "It was not debilitating enough to keep him from combat, but it was remarked upon by most members of the Incursion Team. Lieutenant Cortez was particularly concerned. Shepard agreed to seek medical attention once back on the Normandy."

"It's okay, EDI, the headache's gone now," Shepard assured her. "Probably my amp or lack of sleep. I appreciate the reminder, though." He looked at Joker. "Get some rest. EDI can take the helm. EDI, perform all necessary system checks and diagnostics. I'll be relying on you both once we reach Earth, and I need you at your best."

"You gonna get some rest too, Commander?" Joker asked. "You can't function on adrenaline alone."

"I will. I just have a few things to take care of first."

Joker started to speak again but Shepard had already left the cockpit and was quickly walking away.

Joker and EDI glanced at one other, holding each other's gazes for a moment before they turned back to their consoles.

~o~O~o~

When Shepard entered the shuttle bay, at first he couldn't see Cortez or Vega. He stopped to listen and, after a minute, the sound of quiet bickering reached his ears from the far end of the bay. He allowed himself a small smile and walked in the direction of the reserve Kodiak, past the battered shuttle which had crash-landed on Cronos Station.

"Hey, Loco!" James greeted him, and Steve, who was beneath the raised shuttle craft, quickly pulled himself up and walked up to Shepard, looking him over.

"What did Dr. Chakwas say? Did she give you something? How's the headache now?"

"It's gone, Steve," Adam assured him truthfully, leaving out the small detail that he hadn't visited the doctor. "How are you two doing down here?"

"Figured we didn't have time to fix up A1, so we're getting A2 ready," Steve informed him. "She just needs a little tweaking. Should be ready in about an hour."

"Good. How are things in the armory, James?"

"All done, Commander. Beat those dents outta your chest piece, and all firearms are tuned up and as good as I can get 'em."

Shepard nodded approvingly. "Well done. Go spend some time with Abby. Steve and I will finish up here."

"But, Commander," James began to argue.

"That's an order, James. Stay with Abby and get some sleep. Report back for duty in six hours."

"Right," James mumbled. "I mean, yes, sir. Esteban, make sure Shepard gets some sleep, too."

"_Way_ ahead of you there."

"Clock's ticking, James," Shepard reminded him.

"Yeah, I'm goin'. Thank you, sir." James reached for Adam's hand and shook it, then slapped Steve's arm and departed the hangar.

"You sure you're okay?" Steve asked Shepard once they were alone. "You look a little better, but I was worried about you there for a while. You need to get some sleep."

"Let's get finished up here, then," replied Adam, slipping an arm around Steve's waist and kissing his cheek. "You need to sleep, too. And as for whatever else happens once we're upstairs… I'll leave that up to you."

Steve shoved a small implement into Shepard's hand and nodded at the Kodiak. "What are we waiting for, then?" he teased with a wink, immediately setting to work while a smiling Shepard joined him.

~o~O~o~

"Oh, James!" Abby exclaimed as Vega entered the Port lounge.

"Hey, Chula," he replied with a soft smile, kissing the top of her head as she hugged him tightly.

"I hadn't expected to see you again tonight," she said, standing back and cupping his face with her hands. "Are you all right? I know you told me when you returned that you weren't injured, but I know you," she went on, examining his arms and clucking when she found several bruises. "See? I wouldn't call _that_ not injured."

"Just a few battle badges," he smiled, amused by her fussing. "You know, you're startin' to remind me of Esteban, the way he buzzes around Shepard."

"Well, someone has to worry about you," she said, taking his hand and leading him to a couch, where he sat down. "How long do I have you for?"

"Six hours," he answered, and she blinked in surprise. "Shepard ordered me to get some sleep and spend time with you."

"That was very thoughtful of him," she said, sitting next to him and snuggling up to his chest. "What do you have planned for our six hours, then?"

"I was thinkin' of grabbing some chow from the Mess, eating it here, and you can tell me what you found out about Alistair on that data pad."

She looked at him in confusion. "How did you…? Oh. EDI."

"She mentioned it on the way back. It wasn't a secret, was it? Hey, you don't have to tell me if it's private."

"Oh, no, it's not private at all! In fact, I wanted to tell you but I thought you had more important things to think about, and didn't want to –"

"I can think about Earth when we get there," he interrupted. "Right now, Chula, nothing's more important than you." He glanced at her warily. "Was everything okay? There wasn't nothing bad about him, was there?"

She smiled softly. "No, James, it was all good. I'm… very content with what EDI found."

"That's great," he whispered, nuzzling her hair with his nose. "Well, let's eat, and you can tell me all about it. What'll you have?"

"Surprise me. Nothing heavy, though. It is rather late," she replied with a smile as he kissed her nose and stood up.

"You got it. Be right back."

"Oh, and James?"

He turned around. "Yes, Chula?"

She rose from the couch and looked down, toying with her hands. "Did Commander Shepard order you to get a particular amount of sleep, or specify a time?"

"No, he didn't."

She looked up, directly into his eyes. "Good."

His stomach flipped over and for a few seconds, he was torn between staying and leaving. "I'm gonna get our food _real_ quick, got it?" he promised, pointing at her. "You stay right there."

"I'm not going anywhere, Amado."

"Hey!" he laughed, tickled pink by her nickname for him. "Where did you…? EDI?"

"EDI," she grinned.

"Gonna have to thank EDI when I see her," James said, again turning for the door. "I'll be just a couple minutes, okay?"

"I'll be waiting," she replied, waving him off as he sped out of the lounge.

~o~O~o~

**Later that night, approximately 2:30am**

A pair of fair-skinned hands clutched the long, thin placard. Quiet murmurs could be heard among the small group assembled at the Memorial Wall, but no one had dared speak aloud so far, deeming it disrespectful to do so. When it was clear the holder of the placard was struggling, though, Garrus took a hesitant step forward, laying a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Want someone with you?"

"No. Just a second, damn it," Joker said in irritation before removing his SR-2 cap, the first time many of his crew mates had seen him without it.

"Okay, big guy," Garrus said softly. "Take your time."

"Yeah, thanks." Joker sighed and gave Garrus an apologetic look. The turian nodded before stepping back to join the others.

"Here goes," Joker began heavily, walking forward, where he raised the placard and pressed it to the wall. "Someone to keep you company, Ash," he said, wiping a small speck of dust off the placard bearing EDI's name. "That's it. It's done."

His friends joined him to offer condolences, and to share their memories of EDI. Only Shepard stayed back, and when Joker had finished talking to the rest of the crew, he turned, his eyes briefly locking with the commander's.

He then walked past Shepard without saying a word, replacing his cap as he stepped onto the elevator.

One by one, Shepard's crew turned to look at him, an unspoken accusation in their expressions. They began to depart in silence, none of them speaking to him, leaving only Garrus behind.

"I, uh…" Garrus mumbled, unable to look Shepard in the eye. "You shouldn't blame yourself. It doesn't matter what they think."

"What do _you_ think?" Adam heard himself say.

Garrus shrugged. "Doesn't matter what I think, either. Won't bring her back. I… I gotta…" He pointed towards the Mess and quickly walked away, shaking his head.

"Adam. Adam! Wake up! It's okay, it's just a dream!"

"What? I… what's… EDI?" Adam blurted out in a panic, quickly extricating himself from Steve and sitting up on the edge of the bed. "EDI!"

"Yes, Shepard?"

Adam failed to respond and Steve propped himself up, watching his lover's back, his heavy breathing, the rise and fall of his shoulders.

"Is there something I can assist you with, Shepard?" EDI prompted, and Shepard rubbed his forehead hard, as though attempting to eradicate a headache.

"No. How long before we reach Sol?" he grunted, the reality of their situation returning to him, though remnants of the unpleasant dream still lingered on the edges of his mind.

"Two hours, thirty-three minutes."

"Two…? Damn it, EDI, we were only five hours out when I went to bed! What's the hold up? What the hell's Joker doing?"

"Jeff is sleeping, Shepard. I am in control of the helm, and the Normandy is on schedule to rendezvous with the vanguard of the united fleet at the appointed time. It would be inadvisable to increase our velocity, as doing so would countermand Admiral Hackett's orders. It would also place the propulsion system under increased stress, which would require maintenance the crew would not have time to undertake before reaching Sol."

Shepard placed his head in his hands, letting out a soft groan, his headache fading. "No, don't increase our velocity. Just… keep doing what you're doing. I'm sorry."

"No apology is necessary," EDI replied before the comm. was cut.

Steve brought his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, knowing by now it was better to let Adam speak when he was ready. This time, however, all that came from Shepard was silence, and Steve continued to wait.

"I'm taking a shower," Shepard muttered after a few minutes, springing up and walking towards the steps.

"Adam, wait." Steve kicked the covers off himself, stood up and slowly approached Shepard as he halted and turned around. "It's the middle of the night. Come back to bed. Please."

"No, I can't sleep. I don't _want_ to sleep." He pointed at his cabin wall, in the direction of Sol. "You think those people on Earth are getting any sleep? Those who are still alive, that is?"

His eyes met Steve's and they watched each other for a moment. With a sigh, Adam backed down from his belligerent stance, the worry and pity in Cortez's eyes disarming him. "Steve… I'm… I'm sorry. I just want this done. I need to get out there where I can _do _something. I don't know how to do anything else. All this waiting around is driving me crazy."

"What did you dream about?" Steve asked gently, but Shepard shook his head, a clear refusal to answer in the stubborn set of his jaw.

Steve's hand wrapped around Adam's and he was led back to the bed, where both men sat down.

"We don't need to sleep," Cortez murmured. "Let's just sit here for a while."

"I'm probably not the best person to be around," Shepard argued, feeling wretched for taking his fear of failure out on Steve, on EDI… on everyone.

"You're the only person I want to be around." Steve wrapped an arm around Adam's waist and pulled him close, Adam sighing and resting his head on Steve's shoulder.

"I couldn't have done any of this without you," Adam said softly. "How you've put up with me I'll never know. You're a goddamn saint."

"Shh," Steve intoned, pressing a kiss to Adam's temple. "We're in the home stretch. Soon, this'll all be over."

"One way or another," Adam mumbled, snaking his arms around Steve and not letting go.


End file.
